


Apartment 7B

by EndovaElixabete



Category: Persona 5, Persona Series
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drama & Romance, Fluff and Angst, I at least know a little bit about NYC, I'll tag the characters as they appear in the story!, M/M, Ratings and Warnings will change as time goes on, This is set in New York City
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-31
Updated: 2018-11-04
Packaged: 2019-03-11 18:35:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 31
Words: 102,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13530183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EndovaElixabete/pseuds/EndovaElixabete
Summary: It's warm. Too warm for Ryuji's liking. It is fall, after all. But as he lay there in his studio apartment on this warm morning before dawn, a familiar scent hits his nose. Cigarettes. He hates cigarettes. And he's determined to let his neighbor know his exact feelings on them. But who is this guy greeting him with a warm smile and the promise of coffee? That... Wasn't how he thought this would pan out. He certainly didn't think that maybe he'd have a future with this annoying, sassy, rude, beautiful man living in the apartment just below his own.Nor did he expect to get dragged into so much trouble because of him either.





	1. Cigarettes

**Author's Note:**

> Terrible summary, I know. I apologize!
> 
> I'm not sure if I'll continue this story or not. I would like a bit of feedback though. I do have a lot of ideas for this! And I would love to continue. If anyone seems to like it, then I'll be sure to try and keep up with it! Updates may tend to be slow though.
> 
> Enjoy!

It was far from a glamorous way to live. 

Living in a shitty apartment due to the unbelievable amount of money that had to be spent on rent on any place to live in this godforsaken city wasn’t exactly Ryuji Sakamoto’s idea of luxury. His job at the convenience store wasn’t all that charming or beneficial to his pockets, but when your English was a little tight and you were too stubborn to head back home with your tail tucked between your legs, you got what you could get. 

Ryuji was not someone who gave up easily either.

But when it was slow and he didn’t have to deal with crazy racists, drunks, or druggies, the job wasn’t… The worst. Asking people to repeat themselves a couple of times wasn’t so bad if the customer was a halfway decent person. Normally no one minded having to speak a little more slowly to the (obviously) foreign blond. Even if they did complain about it under their breath. 

But what he hated most was the assholes that insisted on talking on the phone through their entire transaction.

“Would you like a bag? Cash or card? Credit? Debit? Have a nice night!” 

There was never an honest response from any of those dickwads. And not to mention they were often the most irritated when asked to repeat themselves.

Ugh.

Slipping in through the small metal-framed door that held large glass panes covered in heavy metal bars after stuffing his keys into the lock, Ryuji took a few steps into the building. The sound of the door slamming behind himself was so monotonous that he barely paid it any heed. There was no need to. He was used to the sound. A loud thud. The click of the lock taking effect again. It wasn’t anything special.

He dragged his feet through the dingy lobby of the lowest floor of the apartment complex. The once cream-colored walls were stained a dark sepia from years of dust and dirt accumulation. The place was in dire need of a paint job. 

And a scrub down.

A long-forgotten (and very obviously plastic) plant sat in the far corner of the room to the right of the staircase. It’s (what used to be) bright green leaves were caked with dust and grime. He swore he noticed a familiar orange tint of someone’s long night at some of the nearby bars the first week he’d lived in this place, but apparently someone (one of the shittiest janitors he’d ever imagined, probably) had the decency to at least clean that part up. But if you were going to clean up the bottom leaves, you might as well clean the rest of it, right? Ugh. Lazy piece of shit custodians.

The elevator was caked in grime as well. In fact, some days Ryuji thought twice about taking the gross piece of machinery up to his floor and instead opted to maybe take eight flights of stairs up to his small apartment.

Maybe.

Unlikely.

Eight floors was a shit ton of stairs. And after a long night of work, Ryuji really didn’t want to slaughter the hell out of his feet even more than they’d already been slayed. Poor things. Ryuji really needed a new pair of sneakers. 

Deciding today was one of those days that he’d risk sickness by taking the elevator and pressing the grody buttons, Ryuji took a moment to lightly punch the button beside the slimy green doors. The light immediately turned on to signify that his request for the small, tight moving room had been accepted. And then he waited. And waited. Hell, it was probably coming from the top floor. Why was there only one elevator in a building that held ten flights of apartments? What a dump this place was.

Taking off the black cap they’d allowed him to wear during his shifts, Ryuji then rubbed his slightly-sweaty face on the back of the sleeve of his sweat jacket. It was probably a little too warm to be wearing his sweatshirt home like that (especially on the train. It got hot down there!), but he hadn’t really thought about that when he’d left work that day. He really couldn’t wait to get home and take off this disgustingly sweaty red-and-black polo they’d forced him to wear every night of his life. But a uniform was a uniform, right? It wasn’t like he had the privilege of choosing what he wore to work.

He slouched, shoving his free hand into his pocket while he used his hat as a fan to try and cool his face and neck a little. Just a few short minutes and he’d be back in his apartment and relaxing on his couch. Shit. Should he check his mailbox? And what was taking this elevator so long?

Wondering for a moment if he should actually check for mail, the bleached-blond male turned to face the metal wall-hanging. It was situated at the bottom of the stairs and right in front of the door to the outside. He didn’t even have to search for which one belonged to his place anymore. Two rows down from the top and second one in. Apartment 8B was where he resided. 

But just as he contemplated actually removing his keys from his pocket and sorting through them to find the one for his mailbox, Ryuji heard the all-too-familiar double-ding noise that meant the elevator had gotten to his floor. Great. He’d just check it later. The need to go home was far greater than the need to check for some flimsy pieces of paper reminding him to pay his bills or whatever. It wasn’t like he got any good mail, after all. No one wrote him. Ever.

He slipped into the elevator without a second thought. No regrets, right?

Pressing the button for the eighth floor, Ryuji leaned back against the corner of the elevator with a low groan. He continued to lazily fan himself for a few moments longer before letting that hand fall to his side. Running his fingers through his hair rather roughly, his eyes fell closed.

“Man…”

He was tired. Not like it mattered to anyone aside from himself. But, god, he was too tired to even bother thinking about a shower before he went to bed for the day.

The “double-ding” resonated through the narrow hallway and the elevator, and Ryuji shoved himself away from the wall and dragged his feet across the tiles. The hallway was carpeted, and Ryuji was sure that it hadn’t been vacuumed in quite a few years. It was caked in certain areas, and what was once probably a vivid chocolate-brown diamond-shaped pattern was now just… Mud. It looked like mud. Especially in the dull light of the hallway. 

Down past the first apartment, 8A, Ryuji walked, and towards the end of the hall to his own place.

Fishing his keys from the pocket of the sweatjacket they’d been deposited into after entering the building, He placed his hat back onto his head, backwards, and then began sorting through the small stack of keys on the ring with both hands. It wasn’t difficult to find which key belonged to the apartment. And then it was promptly stuffed into the lock and the door was open and just _finally_ Ryuji could be comfortable and at home.

Or as comfortable as he could be in a place like this. It wasn’t exactly _cozy_ , but it was better than living on the streets. Living was so expensive in a place like this. A small, poorly managed studio apartment should not cost as much as it did, but what could you do?

Thus was the life of convenience store clerk in the city that doesn’t sleep.

It wasn’t like he was a millionaire. And he really didn’t feel like one either. 

Once the door was open, the blond felt himself heave a sigh of relief. His hand reached out to absently turn on the light switch, and the unprotected bulb flickered on after a few short moments. The door was shut and Ryuji’s shoes were kicked off and to the ground somewhere that he did not pay attention. His socked feet hit the worn out carpeting and he could feel the stress melting away.

It was a poor excuse of a home, but it was home. It was the one place in this stupid country that Ryuji could feel happy and relaxed, and he couldn’t wait to finally have a few moments to himself. It may not have been well-decorated or filled with expensive items, but home was home, and Ryuji was going to allow himself to relax.

Off came his purple sweatshirt and it was tossed onto the foot of his bed. His hat joined it, landing atop the jacket with a dull thud, and then his work shirt was next. The black jeans he wore would join them soon, as would his plain white undershirt. But that would be after a much needed shower. 

And with that, Ryuji spread his arms out wide and flopped backwards onto his bed. His legs dangled over the edge and his feet lay flat against the ground, and for the first time since he’d left for work that afternoon he could take a long, fresh breath.

His eyes fell closed and a smile weaved onto his face. Soon, after being able to will up enough energy, he’d heave himself out of the bed to take a shower. But for now he’d spend his time resting on the bed for a few minutes in as much silence as he could. It may have been four in the morning, but this was still New York City, and it was never truly quiet. Thankfully though, he was on the eighth floor, which meant it was much more quiet this high up than it would have been in the apartments closer to the ground level. The once loud car noises and shouting fell dull on his ears, and he took yet another deep breath.

Even with his window slightly opened, it was quiet enough for him to try and rest well. Ah, this was nice. Finally some peace and quiet. Finally he could have some time to himself. He could soon take a shower, eat some cereal, maybe play a little bit of a videogame, and then he could head off to sleep. Most of the people in the building worked during the daytime, so the complex would be relatively quiet after a certain point in the morning. 

That was if the kids upstairs weren’t stomping around.

But he was tired-- oh so tired. His eyelids were heavy. That, paired with his slow breathing, was making him feel even more at rest, and he could swear that he’d be falling asleep soon. Hell, maybe even now. But he really should get dressed properly for bed. And he really did have to eat something. He hadn’t eaten since before work the afternoon before. But the bed was so comfortable…

Okay, so maybe he could, in theory, just fall asleep. And that idea was looking more and more like the obvious choice by the second.

In the distance he could hear the familiar blaring of a car horn, but he continued to rest in the half-warm room in silence and semi-darkness. That was until a certain scent hit his nose.

Ryuji was awake in an instant. Wide awake. Really? Now? It was faint at first, but the more time passed, the stronger and stronger the smell was becoming. There was no mistaking it’s source. 

The familiar scent of cigarette smoke was filling his small apartment. And Ryuji knew exactly where it was coming from. Sitting up on his bed with a growl, he leaned forward and onto his legs, hands dangling in front of himself. Really? Just when he was getting to relax.

That guy in apartment 7B was the worst. The absolute worst.

Every day-- every. Single. Day. Ryuji had to deal with the horrible stench of cigarettes filling his home. And it always happened in the morning. The early morning. He seriously couldn’t wait until Ryuji was sleeping before he decided to burden everyone with his stupid cancer-sticks? It wouldn’t have been bad if it wasn’t the apartment right below himself. But the smell rose, and Ryuji could always smell it inside his apartment. It was horrible, and he always found trouble sleeping because of it. The damn scent gave him headaches.

And he was tired of it. Especially after a long and stressful shift at work.

And it really didn’t help that his bed was situated just against the window that the smoke would be coming from. 

The scenario infuriated Ryuji. It’d been six months of this bullshit, and he was going to put an end to it. Right now. What better time than when he was so angry? Maybe it’d get his point across better, right?

Kneeling atop his bed, Ryuji reached for the window that was sitting slightly open and grasped the frame. His knees were on his pillow as he shoved the window open further with all his might. There was no screen, which was probably why he’d always find flies in the apartment after leaving the window open for the long hours of the night while he was away, but that thought was pushed to the back of his mind as he gripped the windowsill with both hands and thrust his head outside. 

He looked down, through the grates of the fire escape. There was a male sitting on a chair just below the grates. His black hair was frizzy and it stuck out in various area. It was like he’d just crawled out of bed. There were a few flower pots set around his chair, and in his lap sat a cat. A black and white cat. They seemed to be enjoying themselves in the early morning, but Ryuji was more focused on grabbing that cigarette out of this asshole’s hand and shoving it down his throat. He didn’t do that (he couldn’t reach), but he sure as hell wanted to.

“Hey!” He yelled, attempting to get this guy’s attention. And it worked. The male (and his cat) glanced up at Ryuji with what seemed seemed to be looks of shock. Really? Had he startled them? Good. But for the first time Ryuji noticed that the other male was wearing glasses. Thick-rimmed glasses that took up most of his dumb face. Not that he cared. Because he didn’t. He was too angry about the cigarette to care about this guy’s looks.

“What’s the big deal?” He asked, his eyes narrowing at the sight of his anger. This guy sure did look comfortable regardless of his making everyone else uncomfortable. Must be nice. Ryuji wished he could be that carefree as well.

But the guy just looked confused. Really? Was he that shocked? Then again, Ryuji was yelling at him out of nowhere. Anyone was bound to be pretty shocked in a situation like this, huh? But Ryuji was just so focused on his anger that he really didn’t care about this guy’s feelings. Besides. It wasn’t like he’d been caring about Ryuji’s feelings up until now either.

Even if he didn’t know them until now. But that didn’t matter. Ryuji was angry.

But then suddenly the guy was smiling, and he gave Ryuji a small wave. “Good morning.”

What? What in the world was he getting at? Good morning? That was not the response Ryuji had been expecting.

And it startled him. Blinking a few times, the blonde then shook his head. “The cigarette. Put that shit out.” He demanded. But he also felt like he was being incredibly rude. Not greeting him like he did the blonde? Frowning, Ryuji huffed. “A-and good mornin’.” He was not going to be the asshole in this situation.

The guy sure did look confused again. He looked down at the cigarette in his hand almost as if he’d never even noticed it there. Um. Was he an idiot?

But then he looked back up to Ryuji, motioning to it with his free hand. “This?”

Yeah. That. Was he an idiot? Then again, he may have just been completely stunned since he’d probably just woken up. It was just after four in the morning. Ryuji was sure that no reasonable human, aside from himself, was awake at the moment. Not in this timezone at least. 

“Yeah. That. Shit stinks. I can smell it in here.” It was like he had to explain everything to this guy. Yes. Cigarettes smelled bad. And he wasn’t the only one that could smell them. And he had a cat! Wasn’t that bad for the poor thing to be breathing in too?

And it was almost like he had no idea what he was even doing out on that fire escape. Regardless, he pushed the cigarette out of view, and Ryuji assumed that he was stomping it out in an ashtray or something. The smell still lingered, but he did wave the smoke out of his face, then looking back up at Ryuji again as if looking for approval.

Well… That was far easier than Ryuji had ever thought. The thought there might have been a fight at some point. Hell, this guy just rolled over and exposed his stomach for Ryuji, didn’t he? He didn’t fight back at all. 

Maybe Ryuji was just hoping for him to be a jerk so that he could take his anger out on something. He had made him pretty angry, after all.

But Ryuji didn’t know how to answer. Not when this guy was looking at him like an expectant puppy. 

“Er, thanks…” He mumbled, to which he received a nod.

Okay. Now what?

Did he just slink back into his room? Did he try to start up a conversation with him? Honestly, the first option sounded best. He had a shower and some dinner to get to, after all. It sounded like a great option. And he was about to do it when he heard the other male speak again.

“Coffee?” Huh? Coffee? Looking back down at him, Ryuji noticed that the black haired male was holding a coffee mug. He must have been enjoying his morning routine when Ryuji bothered him. He felt bad. This guy was just trying to enjoy his morning before heading out to work, huh? It sure seemed like it.

But then Ryuji was reminded of just how much he hated the scent of cigarette smoke, and he didn’t feel bad for disturbing him anymore. Not. At. All.

But was he offering Ryuji a cup? That was weird. He’d just yelled at him! What was he offering him coffee for? Ryuji didn’t even really like coffee at all. It was bitter and heavy. And it didn’t even wake him up. Or maybe he was just already filled with a lot of energy, and it couldn’t really help. Either way, it was still pretty gross.

But he was wide awake now. And his apartment was completely empty save for himself. He didn’t have anyone to talk to. He didn’t even talk to anyone outside of his business adventures. The last time he’d talked personally with someone was a few days ago with his mom. They did do a lot of calling through different programs on the computer. God, he missed her. It was too bad she was still in Japan…

But was a conversation with a stranger really for the best? Sure, it added a bit of companionship outside of his work adventures, but… This guy had really pissed him off earlier.

Still, the idea of sitting in near silence alone in his apartment was not really all that appealing. And so, with a groan, Ryuji slipped through the window, gripping onto the grates above his head to help him. He didn’t want to fall. 

Maybe this weird stranger could provide him with a bit of entertainment though. If only enough to satisfy him through a cup of coffee.


	2. The Weird Guy Downstairs

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here we go-- at it again, huh? This story is actually inspired by a song. If you can guess it from various points in the story, I would be very surprised. If you have any guesses to what the song may be at any point, I'd like to hear it!

The trip down to the apartment below was a short one. Ryuji stuffed one hand into his pocket as the other gripped onto the railing for added stability. It felt like it had rained earlier in the morning (or maybe even last night), so the fire escape was a tad slippery along the edge. Regardless, he took the few short steps down a floor and came face-to-face with the other male’s cat. Where had its owner gone? Ryuji knew he’d seen him.

Perhaps he’d just left to go into the apartment to get another cup of coffee. One for Ryuji. Great. He still didn’t like coffee, but it was conversation. A little bit of companionship wasn’t bad, right?

“Hey…” He muttered towards the cat. It was sitting on the small chair that the male had been sitting on earlier, licking at one of its front paws. He must have been abandoned in his owner’s attempt at hospitality. 

He was a cute cat. As cute as cats could get. Ryuji was more of a dog kind of guy. But cats weren’t bad. Black with white patches, the cat had a yellow collar around his neck, and Ryuji swore that he could see bright blue eyes. That was if he could trust the dull light coming from inside the other male’s home. Ryuji couldn’t really see inside. There were dark curtains in front of the windows. He really needed to take note of that. Working nights had him sleeping during the day, and his white (or absence of) curtains really didn’t keep the sunlight out. It was tough to sleep sometimes. But he’d always resorted to throwing his blankets over his head.

Reaching out, Ryuji went to pet the cat. His fingers were spread and he was determined to feel the animal’s fur against his palm, but it seemed like the cat had another idea. Slipping away from his hand, he actively dodged the petting and then hopped up and onto the windowsill, escaping into the stranger’s house.

“Little shit…” Ryuji muttered to himself, slipping the hand into his pocket. What a jerk cat. They really weren’t the most friendly of animals, were they? He’d never met a cat that really liked him. They all seemed to just avoid him. He sighed. But it did let the blonde’s gaze travel to the windowsill, where he spotted the before-mentioned cigarette. Ugh. That thing. Hopefully the guy would stick to smoking inside from now on. Or out on the street seven floors down. At least he’d put it out. It was bent in various places as it’d been stubbed out, and it lay lifeless inside of a glass ashtray. Ryuji wanted to take the damn thing and throw it off of the fire escape.

“He’s not friendly.” Huh? Oh, the guy was back. 

Watching as the curtain was pushed to the side, the stranger held out the mug from the depths of his apartment. It seemed rather dangerous to be drinking a stranger’s coffee like this, but Ryuji took the mug regardless of the situation with a small muttered: “thank you.”

The other male looked like he stepped onto something before climbing through the window with a small jug of milk and a jar tucked into his arm.

Crap. Had he heard what Ryuji said about his cat? Rude. Ryuji had been so rude to this guy’s cat for no reason. His cheeks turned pink. Did he really have to verbalize his feelings like that? He should have kept his big mouth shut. But he didn’t seem upset about it. In fact, the guy was smiling a little bit, and he was motioning out to the chair like he was offering it to Ryuji. He wanted to turn him down, but he also thought that sitting would be a good idea. His feet were killing him. 

He took the seat without a word, and then the sugar and milk were promptly held out in front of his face. He fumbled with them for a moment, unsure where to put anything. But he started with the mug of coffee being placed between his legs on the chair. Then, whatever extra could go on the windowsill. Right? Perfect. 

Unfortunately, there didn’t seem to be nearly enough room in the mug for the amount of milk that Ryuji was going to add. Coffee was far too bitter for his liking. Oh well. He’d have to make sure to suffer through it. If only for a little bit of conversation. That’s what his mission here was, right?

He dumped a bit of sugar from the jar into the mug and then returned it to the windowsill. It was probably enough, right? Ryuji usually loaded his coffee with a ton of sugar-- on the rare occasions that he did drink it. 

And then he added the milk. He could feel the other guy’s gaze on him as he opened the bottle of milk and then poured it into his mug up to the brim. There. He stirred it next with the spoon that was provided, slipping the milk jug next to the sugar one. And then he lifted his drink. Okay, here goes nothing, right?

He took a sip. A small sip. It was still hot, and it burned his tongue a little bit. But it wasn’t… Unpleasant. If he had to pick a word for it he’d pick mooth. It went down easily and quickly, despite the underlying bitterness that often came with the caffeinated drink. Still, it wasn’t bad.

“Do you like it?”

Ryuji was startled out of his thoughts. So much so that he flinched, coffee spilling out and onto one of his hands. Quickly licking at the liquid on his hand, he was suddenly reminded that he… Really wasn’t alone. His neighbor was still standing there, and he could once again feel the other looking at him. Flushing, he glanced to his neighbor with a frown.

He was looking at Ryuji with wide, expectant eyes. It was like he was genuinely curious in what the blonde thought of his bean-water. He was almost hiding behind the mug he held in his own hands, taking a sneaky little sip of his own coffee, and for the first time Ryuji had gotten a good look at him.

His hair was a mess. It was obvious that he’d just rolled out of bed. His glasses were almost too big for his thin face. They certainly were large, as were his eyes, but Ryuji didn’t think that was because of the magnification from the lenses of his glasses. Maybe he just had big eyes-- large and innocent looking. He wore an oversized sweater that hung loosely over his thin body: the sleeves pulled over his fingers a little. And looking over the rest of his outfit proved Ryuji right. He was in a pair of sweatpants that slouched at his waist, and a shirt that looked far too big for him as well. His feet were bare as well, and for a moment Ryuji admired how tall the other male looked. He did seem pretty tall, hovering above Ryuji even as he leaned against the window to his apartment.

He took one hand from his coffee mug and pushed his glasses up higher onto the bridge of his nose, and Ryuji was then reminded that he was waiting for an answer.

Was it that weird that he’d been studying this guy instead of answering his question? Probably. But he didn’t really care. Instead, Ryuji sat back in his chair with his coffee, smelling it for a moment. 

“It’s good.”

The stranger seemed very pleased with the answer. He was smiling now, and he turned to sit on the windowsill of another window, his hands holding his mug against his outstretched legs as he looked out and at the building on the opposite side of the small side street.

It fell quiet after that. Ryuji wasn’t sure what to say next. He really wasn’t all that great at socializing, and this stranger didn’t seem to know what to talk about either. So, they sat in silence after that, the both of them sipping away at their coffees every few moments. Ryuji would admit that it felt like an awkward silence. Two strangers sitting next to each other and just looking at the wall of a building as they drank coffee. 

And Ryuji hated this silence. This was no different than if he was sitting alone in his apartment, except he had a drink this time. It wasn’t really what he’d wanted. He wanted to talk. He wanted a personal conversation. He hadn’t had one of those in such a long time. Not with someone aside from his mother, of course.

Letting his hands fall to his lap, Ryuji looked down at the coffee in his mug. He’d only finished about a fourth of it, but he wasn’t looking to finish off the whole thing. It was one of his least favorite drinks, after all. But what was he supposed to talk about over this cup of coffee?

Well, he could start with how rude he was to this guy’s cat. And then maybe escalate from there.

“Hey, uh…” He began after looking over at the stranger. He was met with a curious glance, the black-haired male giving him a small smile before sipping at his coffee once more. 

“Sorry,” Ryuji continued, looking back down at his mug again. If he wanted to maybe make a friend, then he needed to be more likeable, right? “You know. For the comment about your cat.”

He was met with a chuckle. This guy was really laughing at his apology. What a weirdo. Ryuji insulted his cat and everything, and he thought it was funny? It had Ryuji frowning, nose crinkling at the sound. This guy was strange. Really strange.

“It’s okay.” Well, he wasn’t expecting that.

But it fell silent again after that. Was this guy just quiet? Maybe he wasn’t good with talking? Ryuji knew he wasn’t himself, but it would be nice for him to… Try to make conversation. Ryuji was really trying here! The least the stranger could do was help out a little bit. He’d invited Ryuji down here for coffee in the first place.

But Ryuji couldn’t really blame him. He did yell at him unprompted earlier…

“And for earlier too. About the cigarettes.” The guy didn’t seem to be so bad. Maybe he just had some really shitty habits.

He, once again, didn’t look upset about Ryuji’s words. Good. Maybe he wasn’t hurt by them. Still, Ryuji really didn’t think his response was unreasonable considering his deep hatred for the… Hobby? Could smoking be considered a hobby?

If it was, it was a piss poor hobby.

The response he was given was just a smile. What? No words? Either this guy was rude or he just really wasn’t all that big on talking. Ryuji was silently hoping that it was the later.

But despite his best efforts, it fell silent again. It was really quiet after that, but it did feel… Different. Ryuji didn’t feel like he had to get anything off of his chest. The stranger wasn’t smoking or anything anymore, and they were just enjoying their coffee. Or the other guy was. Ryuji was sort of suffering through his own mug. It was nothing personal against the guy, but Ryuji just wasn’t a coffee guy.

Hot chocolate, on the other hand…

But did that seem childish? Probably.

He let himself relax back into the chair, sparing a glance up at the sky. He couldn’t really see any stars, much like it was back at home, and it felt like the only bit of home that Ryuji could find in this place. No one spoke Japanese or anything, so he was stuck speaking a language he barely knew in this place. Unfortunately, thrusting himself into a country that spoke majority English was probably not the best idea. But he had really improved since back then! A whole year had passed, and he could successfully, albeit a little slowly, understand most of the words that were thrown his way! Even the inappropriate ones.

“Where are you from?” Ryuji was startled out of his silence, blinking as he looked at the male beside him-- the stranger now looking in his direction as well. “You have an accent.”

Speaking of, this other guy had an accent as well. He didn’t seem like he came from the United States, but the way he pronunciated his words was much clearer than Ryuji imagined his own sounded. It was like he had more experience with the language. But Ryuji had only started smelling the cigarettes a few months ago. Then again, that didn’t mean he hadn’t lived in an English-speaking country long, just that smoking was a new habit. Or he lived somewhere else around here. But, if anything, his accent was a bit similar to Ryuji’s. Perhaps he was from somewhere nearby as well.

However, it was like he was reading Ryuji’s mind. The blonde had just been thinking about Japanese, had he not? That was a strange coincidence. 

But it was the most words he heard out of the other guy. Ever.

“Huh?” He asked after his initial surprise at the sudden conversation again. “I’m from Japan. Tokyo.” It was a large city. This guy was bound to at least have heard of it, right? Even if he couldn’t point it out on a map.

“Oh? Me too!” And suddenly, the strangers words were switched to Japanese. Oh. Oh, thank God. That was so much easier to understand, and Ryuji didn’t have to think for a bit before his responses. Japanese was the language he knew best. And although he didn’t mind English, Japanese was so, so much better. 

“I’m a country boy though.” That explained why his accent was a little different. He must have just been from a different region. 

It was such a pleasant surprise that Ryuji could feel himself smiling as he shifted in his chair, elbows on his knees.

“Great!” He began, chuckling a little bit. “I thought I was going to be stuck speaking English forever!” 

The response was a small chuckle as the male reached into the pocket of his sweater (wasn’t he hot in that? It was still pretty warm this high up…) and pulled out his phone. The screen lit up as he pressed the button on the front, illuminating his torso as he checked. 

“Oh.” He muttered just before he downed the rest of his coffee. “I have to get ready.” For work? Probably. Most people worked during the day. But it seem seem really early for that, didn’t it? Then again, Ryuji really couldn’t talk. He’d just gotten out of work.

He did wonder what the other male did for a living though.

But he wandered close to Ryuji, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Stay. Finish up.” It was an order, but there was no malice behind it. It seemed more like a gentle coaxing for Ryuji to stay and take his time to finish his coffee at a pace that he liked. He was smiling as he spoke too, then brushing past the blonde as he climbed back into the apartment through the window. 

And then Ryuji felt awkward again. Frowning, he heaved a small sigh. It was awkward to sit out here by himself, but it wasn’t so bad, right? The guy had insisted he could sit out here. So he did. Though he really didn’t drink much more of his coffee.

Ryuji could hear the sound of rustling from inside the apartment, and some meowing. Obviously from the cat. Maybe it was his breakfast time or something. He certainly was talkative, and the stranger didn’t seem to be doing anything to try and keep him quiet. He did hear him chuckle a few times though. But that cat sure was loud, huh?

Ryuji then took a moment to look at his surroundings for a moment. On either side of the chair were small planters with flowers in them. They’d likely have to be moved inside once the winter hit. Unless he was okay with them dying. With how kind he seemed to be already though, Ryuji really didn’t think he wanted his cute flowers dying. 

Cute? This wasn’t cute. It was just plants. What about a guy growing plants on his fire escape was cute?

He rolled his eyes at his own thoughts.

He looked down at his mug of coffee again, frowning. He’d only drank about half of it by that point. Was he going to be finished by the time the other male had to leave? Ryuji wasn’t sure he could force it all down by then. Then again, he wasn’t sure how long it would be until the guy had to leave either. 

Maybe he could down it all in one shot. But was he willing to suffer through that? He was considering it. He didn’t want to be that jerk to hold the guy up any longer than he already had. 

He lifted the mug up towards his mouth, but he only got about halfway there when he noticed the curtain rustling behind himself. The stranger appeared again, and it looked like he was sitting on something next to the window, laying his arm on the windowsill as he looked to Ryuji.

“I’m heading out.” Wow. That was pretty fast. But Ryuji was saved. Instead of taking a sip from his coffee, he instead placed it in the stranger’s upturned hand. He accepted it happily, pulling it inside of the apartment and then he motioned to the plants beside Ryuji. 

Without a word, the blonde looked to his side. A pack of cigarettes sat atop the planter, as did a lighter. Did he really expect Ryuji to pass those over to him? He knew, or at least he really _should_ have known, that Ryuji didn’t like them.

Regardless, Ryuji sighed as he picked up the two items and passed them over. There was no reason to try and start an argument with him, right? He was kind enough to make Ryuji a cup of coffee, and he did clean up everything. Before Ryuji could even notice. Where the hell had the milk and sugar gone? He hadn’t even seen him take those inside. Maybe Ryuji was lost in thought at the time. 

“Have a good day.” Ryuji muttered. He could feel himself frowning. He didn’t like the thought of spending the remainder of the day alone again. Hell, this guy was the only one who’d offered him any sort of companionship really since the blond had moved here. Was it bad to say that he enjoyed the time he spent with this guy? Even as short as it had been…

But the stranger hadn’t left yet. Instead, he opened his cigarettes and popped one into his mouth. He didn’t light it, which Ryuji was thankful for, bt he didn’t get up to leave either. He just sat there for a few moments, smile still playing on his lips.

And then he pulled the cigarette from his mouth, holding it between two fingers. “Visit me again sometime.”

And Ryuji frowned again. Really? He wanted him to come back? That was weird. Really weird. Ryuji had done nothing but yell at him in the beginning. 

But he had warmed up to him a bit… At the end, at least.

The only thing Ryuji could do at the moment was nod. Okay, sure. Come and visit this weird guy. He could do that, right? He lived right downstairs… Judging when he was home would be the most difficult part. 

The stranger waved him goodbye when Ryuji ascended the stairs again, and the blonde heard the window shut at just about the time that he reached his own apartment once again. Climbing back into his home and onto his bed, Ryuji rolled out onto his back. His arms were spread at his sides much like they had been earlier, and he heaved a sigh. Maybe it was time to just head to bed.

The next day he didn’t visit the stranger, but the scent of cigarettes at four in the morning didn’t have him nearly as angry as it had in the past.


	3. Personal Space

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Actual bachelor Ryuji Sakamoto.

It’d been a week since he met the guy from downstairs.

Ryuji hadn’t been down there since the first day they’d met. He wasn’t exactly sure how to confront a guy like that again. He’d been asked to go and visit the guy from downstairs again,but he really wasn’t sure how to confront him. Should he just go downstairs while he was smoking again? Something about that seemed wrong. And cigarette smoke gave Ryuji headaches.

So he settled for just closing his window whenever he smelled that his neighbor was downstairs with his coffee before work. It did make for some lonely mornings though. Ryuji finally knew that there was someone close by that spoke the same native language as himself, but he was too nervous to go down and just say hello.

Would it be weird if he did? On one hand he’d been invited, but on the other… Did it seem too eager? For friendship… But did this guy have friends? Did he _want_ friends? Did he want _Ryuji_ as a friend?

He’d seemed so kind the other day too…

Ryuji lay on his bed, a place he found himself often, one foot dangling over the side of the bed as the other sat atop the brown, scuffed coffee table he had near his old sofa. The apartment was pretty small for any sort of normal living space. The “living room” could easily be reached from the “bedroom”. Then again, it was a studio apartment in New York City. There really was no hope for a large place to stay.

A penthouse was looking better and better the more time passed. But he _really_ could not afford one. Those things were really fucking expensive.

But living in this small apartment really wasn’t something he wanted to do for the rest of his life. His dream? Probably to move back to Tokyo at some point. Being close to his mother again would be a really nice treat. Not to mention Japan was home. The United States, not so much. It was nothing personal. This place just didn’t have his lovely mother. No place was home without his mother.

Staring up at the ceiling, Ryuji debated whether he actually felt like getting out of bed that day. He had off that night, so he’d likely be stuck in the apartment all night long. But it was the late afternoon. Getting out of the house might be nice. But what would he do? He had no idea. Maybe a walk? But that required getting dressed. And he was really enjoying laying in his bed in just a pair of brown sweatpants.

And while he debated on what to do, he just laid there and stared at the ceilings. Hmm. Maybe he could play a video game.

He yawned, one of his hands hovering above his mouth as he did. Okay, so maybe going back to bed for a few hours sounded a lot nicer than any of his other options. But he really didn’t feel like shifting properly onto his bed either.

Getting up to go to the bathroom earlier had really tired him out. It was hard work hauling yourself out of bed, okay?

Maybe today was a good time to go get those new sneakers he needed though.

Or, perhaps, he could just go another day.

That sounded much better.

Despite the fact that his feet would really not appreciate that once it came time to go to work again.

Okay, so maybe laying in bed for a little while longer and _then_ going out to purchase new shoes was the best option. It didn’t sound like fun, but it sure did sound responsible.

And Ryuji was a responsible adult.

But with that, he sighed. His eyes fell closed and he decided that the nap he was contemplating earlier sounded lovely. His ultimate decision would be to nap and then drag himself out of the apartment. A bit of seasonal depression was bound to hit him eventually, so getting out of the apartment for even just a little bit might help with that. 

Wonderful.

And he felt himself slowly drifting off to sleep. He wasn’t thinking about anything-- nothing at all. Not even the soft shadow that covered his eyes. He didn’t think it was strange or that it was out of place, nor did he think that the knocking was either.

Wait. Was that a knock? Was someone at the door? 

Opening his eyes, Ryuji sat up just enough to be leaning on his elbows. That was weird. He hadn’t put in a request to fix anything to his landlord (and he certainly didn’t expect the man tho _actually_ show up if he did). 

He looked in the direction of the door. Okay. Knock again if someone is there.

And there was another knock. However, it wasn’t from the direction of the door. Regardless, it did startle Ryuji. And it was only then that he really noticed the shadow looming behind himself.

That was… Weird. Turning to look in the direction of the window, Ryuji raised an eyebrow. There was most certainly someone standing there, but he’d never expected it.

Peeking in through the window, and waving, was his neighbor. Um… Maybe it would be best to get some blinds or something for that window, huh? Ryuji had never felt so vulnerable-- so _exposed_ as he had in that moment. Was it really _that_ easy to see into his apartment like that?

And why was he knocking on the window if Ryuji looked like he was sleeping? Something was definitely wrong with this guy.

But first things first, Ryuji grabbed a shirt that was laying over the arm of his weathered couch and tugged it over his head. It wasn’t like he had anything to hide, but he certainly didn’t want to feel like this guy was looking over… All of him. He’d already seen him while he was practically sleeping.

Running a hand through his hair as he rolled over and got to his hands and knees, Ryuji then reached for the window, shoving it open. His bed was against the window, so it’d been easy to reach. But this really wasn’t something he wanted to wake up to. It just felt… Wrong.

This guy had already seen him in such a sorry state.

Regardless, Ryuji looked up at the other male. 

“Good afternoon.” He was speaking in Japanese, thankfully, but it didn’t seem like he realized just how strange this scenario was. “I’m glad you’re home.”

Glad? Why? 

He was smiling, and he knelt down as if he was trying to get a better look at he blonde. Ryuji was really just… Stunned into silence. He wasn’t sure what to say. He’d only talked to this guy once prior to now, and he was just… Showing up at his window. Like some damn romeo or something. Did that make Ryuji Juliet? He certainly didn’t want to think about that. A steamy romance with his neighbor really wasn’t something he was pining for.

“I brought you something.” Huh? Oh. Looking down at the stranger’s hands, Ryuji noticed that he was holding a small plastic take out container. He hadn’t noticed that before… Then again, he’d been more concerned as to why this guy was suddenly at his window like this. He wasn’t invited up or anything.

But Ryuji sat back on his bed a little bit. Was it the polite thing to invite him inside? Ryuji’s house wasn’t necessarily… _Clean_. That’s not to say it was dirty either!

“H-hey! Uh…” He looked around in panic for a moment before getting out of bed and reaching over it to shove the window open more. As far as it would go. “Come in! Don’t just stand out there like that…” It was dangerous out on the fire escape. It was windy, as noted by the way the stranger’s hair was flowing in the breeze. And why would he make someone stand out there like that?

Then again, why hadn’t he just come to the front door like a _normal_ person? But if it was anything for Ryuji to go by through previous experiences, this guy was not normal. Not in the slightest.

But the stranger didn’t seem bothered. He stood up enough to slip into the apartment, and it was then that Ryuji noticed he wasn’t wearing any shoes. Good. He didn’t want any footprints stuck on his sheets. Then he’d have to clean them.

He reached out and grabbed his neighbor’s arm as he climbed inside, helping him to the ground so he wouldn’t slip and fall. Seriously. Come through the door like a normal person.

But then Ryuji noticed how tall he really was. Ryuji wasn’t short or anything, but this guy had a few good inches on him, and he was sure it wasn’t just because of his slight slouch. It hurt his knee to stand up straight for too long. Could you blame him?

And without another word, the male held out the small container in Ryuji’s direction. The top was opaque, so Ryuji couldn’t tell what was inside, but he could tell that it… Certainly smelled good. Hell. What even was that?

Taking the container, Ryuji turned and walked around his bed and towards the kitchen.

“Ya gave me a scare.” He admitted as he looked to his neighbor again. He wasn’t looking around the apartment so much. Good. Ryuji really didn’t want to worry about what some random guy thought about how messy his place was. Wait. It was _not_ messy. Just not clean either. “Can’t you come through the door? It’s _safer_.”

The response was just a shrug. This guy was something else. Really.

“I thought it’d be more fun.”

What? But it was a thousand times more dangerous. Didn’t he think logically? Apparently not.

Ryuji just huffed as he began rooting through the drawers for a fork. A spoon. Something. Anything clean. He really did need to wash his dishes. Then again, he only had a handful of utensils. Sparing a glance to the nearly full sink, Ryuji sighed. The spoon from his cereal the night before would do, right? At least he’d rinsed it off last night.

And he rinsed it off again, wiping it with a damp rag he used for cleaning as well. He really didn’t have the will to clean it properly at the moment, but the smell from whatever he was brought was making him really hungry. It smelled great.

Slipping back into his “bedroom” again, Ryuji wandered back to the bed and sat down on it. His neighbor joined him as well. He really didn’t mind it. He could sit wherever he liked. But he certainly seemed like he was going to be making himself nice and at home, huh? 

“What is this anyway? Smells amazing.” Ryuji could feel himself salivating a little bit. Gosh, it was so unexpected to be brought a meal like this. He was definitely surprised, but it was not unwelcome. The guy had already made him coffee, so this wasn’t really bad, right?

“Curry.” The stranger was sitting pretty close to Ryuji. Probably a little too close. But he wasn’t… Incredibly uncomfortable that some stranger was so close to him. Not yet. This guy, though weird, was still pretty nice. So he got a little leniency. A _little_.

Curry though? That wasn’t really what he’d expect someone to bring him as a first meal together. Well… Ryuji thought he’d be the only one eating. The container was small, so it was only for one person. 

Smiling a little bit, he opened the small container. He could feel the other male’s eyes on him as he looked at the curry. Oh, and with rice too? How thoughtful. It really did look good though, and Ryuji took his spoon to it, scooping up a little bit of it before slipping it into his mouth. 

It tasted nothing short of heavenly. Filled with vegetables and what looked to be chicken, it tasted warm and comforting. It tasted homemade, really. It was delicious. It was the best curry he’d ever tasted, and that was surprising. He’d had a hell of a lot of curry back in Japan. It was spicy though. Pretty spicy. And though Ryuji’s pain tolerance for spice wasn’t too high, he still couldn’t help but think that the curry tasted, well, _perfect_.

“It’s amazing.” He said before he could think of anything else to say. His mouth hung open slightly as he looked down at the curry in his lap. So much flavor in such a small amount of space? It was shocking. And then he looked over to his expectant neighbor. His eye were as wide as Ryuji remembered, though they were once again hidden behind his thick glasses. It looked like he was waiting confirmation from Ryuji, and that he was happy with the response that he got. “Did you make this?”

The response Ryuji received was a chuckle. It was soft and rather quiet, but the stranger covered his mouth nonetheless. Apparently it was a funny response? Ryuji didn’t think it was that weird of a question.

“No, I don’t cook. My boss made it.” Oh. Still, was that something to laugh about? Ryuji’s cheeks turned a little pink. He was sure that he was being laughed at right now. But… That sort of seemed like it wasn’t the neighbor’s intention.

His boss? Then he must have been a good cook. Thinking about it though, Ryuji was a little bit confused. His neighbor woke up really early and had to be at work early. What exactly did he do? And if his boss brought in lunch to eat… 

What kind of place provided it’s employees with home cooked meals to eat? Maybe he worked in a restaurant or something. But if they sold something this amazing tasting, Ryuji was sure he would have heard about the place by then. It was bound to be popular, right?

Then again, he’d heard that a lot of hidden treasures were around the city. You just had to know where to look.

But the curry really was good. And Ryuji took another bite of it with a hum. So good. 

And then a sudden thought occurred to him. He really… Hadn’t been very hospitable to this guy. All he really did was let him into his house. And now Ryuji was here just eating in front of him. That was pretty rude, huh?

“Oh! Uh, do you want something to drink?” It was better than nothing, right? And he was sure he could find a clean cup in one of the cabinets. “I have water, milk…” He let his voice trail off after that. His fridge really was lacking, and not just in drinks. He really didn’t have much fresh food in his apartment. In fact, milk was probably the only fresh food item he had.

But he really didn’t have the will to cook. You couldn’t blame him, right? It’s not like he had anyone to impress.

His neighbor, who seemed to have himself distracted by looking up at the ceiling at… Nothing (Ryuji knew. He even checked again, despite having been staring at it for a long while earlier), stretched out his legs and leaned back on the bed, his palms pressing into the sheets behind his body. “Water is fine!” He seemed pleased by the question. He was an easy guy to satisfy, huh?

“Right.” Ryuji got up from his spot on the bed and placed down the box of food, setting his spoon inside of the container before he wandered into the kitchen. 

He was right. Finding a clean glass was so much easier than finding something to eat with. He promptly removed it from the cabinet and filled it most of the way from the sink with water. He didn’t have any ice, unfortunately, so his neighbor would have to do without. Maybe some ice cube trays would be a good investment…

He brought the glass back and handed it to his thankful neighbor, who immediately took a sip from it. Maybe he was thirsty. Oh he just wanted to keep his mouth busy. Either way, Ryuji could pat himself on the back. 

He sat back onto the bed instead though, picking up his curry and setting it into his lap once more. He could go back to eating, right? He was still hungry, and the curry was still a little warm. He did wish he had more though. It’d be great for dinner later. But it really would have to do for breakfast.

He did spare another glance to his neighbor though, and he found that the other male was looking down towards his feet. He was sitting upright with his water by now, and there was the softest of frowns on his face. Was he upset? He looked it.

But Ryuji wasn’t sure how to confront that.

It was silent for a few moments, Ryuji looking back down at the curry in his lap. What did he say? The guy looked like he was enjoying himself earlier…

“You never came back to visit.” He suddenly heard the black-haired male say. Really? Was that what he was worried about? Ryuji knew it’d been a few days, but… Oh. Maybe this guy was lonely too. He was an obvious foreigner in the city. Maybe he found trouble making friends as well. Ryuji couldn’t blame him. Though he did seem to be a pretty friendly guy…

“Oh, yeah. Um, sorry about that. I’ve been--” Busy? Not likely. He had nothing to do outside of work. Truth be told, he was just… Nervous. He really didn’t know how to go about seeing his neighbor again-- especially not when he smelled the cigarette smoke.

And speaking of, the guy really didn’t smell like cigarettes. Maybe a little bit. But it was more weird that he also smelled of something else… Coffee? That was strange. But what was _really_ strange was that he was close enough that Ryuji could smell that on him. They were practically on top of each other. Had the other guy scooted closer without him noticing? Or maybe Ryuji had sat down a little too close to him. Was that making his neighbor uncomfortable? As strange as it felt, Ryuji didn’t really mind. For some reason he felt pretty differently around this guy than he would any other stranger. Maybe it was just because he was the first person to really show him this much kindness since he made his trip over to America…

But suddenly, in the blink of an eye, his neighbor was leaning over him. Taking the spoon from Ryuji’s hand, the male scooped up some of the curry and popped it into his mouth with a hum. He was smiling again. “But now you have incentive to visit. I’ll bring you curry if you do.” He said with a chuckle.

Ryuji was stunned into silence. Did this guy have any boundaries? He just… Ate off of Ryuji’s, a stranger’s, spoon. Seemingly without a worry or a care. What if Ryuji was sick? Or diseased? He had no idea! This guy was either really brave or really, really stupid…

But the spoon was tossed back into the container as the male stood, stretching for a moment. And then he huffed, his hands resting on his hips. “I should go. I’ve bothered you enough.”

“Huh?” Ryuji’s eyebrows raised. What was wrong with this guy? He sure did surprise the blonde a lot. Like, _more_ than a lot.

But without another word, the male climbed onto the bed and out of the window, only stopping when he was on the fire escape once again. He turned, placing a hand on the top of the window frame and he bent over enough to peek back in through the window. He was smiling brighter than before, but something about that smile made the hair on the back of Ryuji’s neck stand up.

It was devilish and playful, and there was a glint in his eyes that the blonde couldn’t quite place. And for some reason it scared him a bit. Still, the man’s words were kind. But there seemed to be an underlying venom in them that made Ryuji swallow a lump in his throat.

“See you later, Ryuji!” Eyes widening, Ryuji felt his blood run cold.

_He never recalled telling his neighbor his name._


	4. Shadows

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to get this chapter out sooner today, but I was feeling so lazy my entire day off. I'm sorry for that! I hope you enjoy this chapter though!

How was he supposed to treat his neighbor? Was he supposed to be afraid? Nervous? Mad? Clearly this guy knew him better than Ryuji knew him.But what was he supposed to do?

The fact that his neighbor, a total stranger, knew his name without being told it was just… Unsettling. How in the world could the other male have found out his name? Ryuji was sure he’d never seen him at the convenience store before. He was sure he’d remember someone with a face like his.

Thoughts aside about how weird his neighbor was, Ryuji actually thought he looked pretty… Charming. Handsome maybe? Cute. Definitely cute. His wide eyes definitely gave off the illusion of adorableness.

But the fact that he knew Ryuji’s name out of nowhere was a pretty big turn-off. He really wasn’t going to lie.

But he’d expressed his displeasure with the fact that Ryuji hadn’t come to visit him again. And he knew where Ryuji lived. So if he was going to be worried about anything, it would be the fact that he knew where Ryuji’s place was on top of his name.

He could always play a surprise visit again. And that very thought had encouraged Ryuji to actually buy some blinds for the window behind his bed. That way he could pretend to not be home if he stopped by again.

But he couldn’t hide from him for forever. Ryuji didn’t have the money to move. And the guy was bound to show up again at some point. And if the light was on? Or if he heard Ryuji walking around… 

Well, in order to try and protect himself, Ryuji found himself standing outside of the other male’s apartment. He’d taken the elevator. You know, like a normal person would do. But if this prevented another surprise visit from his neighbor, then so be it.

Then again, his place could be riddled with traps. Maybe he was going to try and kidnap Ryuji and hold him hostage in his apartment. It wasn’t like Ryuji had any friends or anything to be worried about him.

Or maybe he was overreacting. Maybe there was a perfectly reasonable explanation as to why he knew Ryuji’s name without notice. Yeah.

Shifting on his feet, Ryuji glanced around the hall a little nervously. It was just as gross and mud-colored as his own. It seemed like the whole building was that gross yellow and brown combination, huh? The only thing this floor was missing was that mysterious stain on the wall in front of his next door neighbor’s door. 

Some things had to be different floor-to-floor, right? The neighbors certainly were. 

He let out a sigh. There was no use in waiting, right? It’d been a couple of days since his neighbor’s last visit to his place, so it was better to get this trip over with. Right? It was about the same time as it’d been when his neighbor visited him at his place. 

Raising his fist, Ryuji knocked upon the door, only then shoving his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He couldn’t stay for too long-- he had work later on in the night. So it was perfect that he was visiting now. He had a reason to escape if he needed to.

Then again, maybe he wasn’t home.

It didn’t take long for the door to be answered. His neighbor was dressed much more casually than he’d been the other day. Dressed in only jeans and a long-sleeved shirt, he looked pretty comfortable. 

And when he spotted Ryuji, a smile weaved onto his lips. Something looked different about him though. He looked tired. Maybe he was just about to lay down for a nap? Ryuji almost felt bad for bothering him. 

“Hey!” Ryuji said, working a smile onto his face. Regardless of how weird this guy was, he was still pretty nice. Even if he did give Ryuji a big scare the last time they’d seen each other. 

Stepping aside, his neighbor motioned for him to wander in as well. 

All right. This was it. Would he get murdered by this other guy in the apartment? He was definitely thinking about it earlier. With how weird he was, who knew what he could be up to?

Ryuji decided to take his chances and walk into the apartment though, and his neighbor shut the door behind him. So much for an escape if he needed it, right?

Looking around a little bit when he got inside. It certainly looked different than his own apartment. Much more furnished, a darker color scheme, a _really_ dark color scheme. The walls were a dark red, and most of the furniture laying around was either a dark wood or black. The kitchen seemed like the only place that wasn’t so dark with it’s light gray and black colorings. Interesting. Ryuji thought he was more of the kind of guy who would like lighter colors. Neutral colors looked like they would suit him, but in an odd way, so did this. He wandered down the small (very small) hall and past the kitchen and closet to the main living space. Something was bothering him though.

“I thought we weren’t allowed to paint the walls.” Speaking of, the cabinets in the kitchen looked like they’d been painted as well. He was probably going to get in trouble for it. He did look to the wall where most of the windows resided though-- the one leading to the fire escape. Black curtains. He really liked dark colors, huh?

Ryuji was about to turn around when he heard something behind himself though. What sounded like a few items being knocked around at incredible speed, and then the slamming of a drawer. Huh? That was weird. But the sound was over by the time Ryuji was able to turn around.

His neighbor was standing beside his bed now and in front of what looked to be a side table with a lamp on it. His hands were behind his back, and there was a strange expression on his face. Eyebrows knitting upwards, his neighbor was breathing a little heavily as well, and his eyes were wide. His stiff body language was concerning though.

His neighbor was hiding something. 

And the thought that he was going to be dying in this tiny apartment came back to him once more.

“Huh?” His neighbor said, then looking around the room like he hadn’t really noticed that he’d done something wrong. “Oh. That.” He chuckled a little bit, visibly relaxing his posture and holding a hand in front of his mouth. “I’ll pay the fine when I get it.” 

He really didn’t seem to care about having to pay that fine, huh? Meanwhile, Ryuji was doing what he could to keep all of the money that he could. 

Maybe his neighbor was a little too carefree. 

And maybe Ryuji was being a little too paranoid about the whole dying thing. Maybe his neighbor had just been bothered in the middle of something else. He probably didn’t expect to have any visitors, and maybe he was hiding something a little more _private_ than what he’d like Ryuji to see. 

Keep believing he’s a good guy, Ryuji. Put your faith in him like any good neighbor would do. He’d been nothing but nice so far. 

The male moved closer to Ryuji though, before brushing past him and to the couch. It was facing away from Ryuji and towards the far side of the room at a television, and then a sudden thought came to the blonde’s mind. His neighbor probably had the correctly envisioned layout of the apartment. It was identical in size and layout to Ryuji’s, but the furniture was in different spots. The bed was against the wall with no windows (which was probably the best idea, in hindsight), and he set the living space to be in the brighter location. Huh. But Ryuji was so used to the layout of his own place, that he really didn’t think changing it now would be the best idea. It’d just feel… Weird.

The cat his neighbor owned was currently napping on top of the couch, and Ryuji could tell since it had to be lifted off of the cushions. He didn’t look too happy about it either, but his neighbor cradled the cat to his chest, scratching behind his ears while he looked to Ryuji. 

“Sit. Please.” His voice was soft and there was a small, warm smile on his lips now. He was acting like he was inviting a good friend to come and chat with him. They barely knew each other, but this guy seemed like such a friendly guy… Maybe he was easy to get along with, and maybe he made friends easily.

But Ryuji did listen to him. He walked over to the rather expensive looking sofa and sat down on the side by the windows, glancing around the room again. Come to think of it, this guy had a lot of things that looked like they were worth quite a bit of money. Maybe he was a man of expensive taste.

But how could he afford it? His job must be high paying, huh?

His apartment was definitely nice though. He still had the same tiles and flooring as Ryuji, but this was a home fit for someone who liked a little bit of class. Despite the ugly tiles in the entryway. And the kitchen. And he probably had the same ones in the bathroom as well.

His neighbor joined him on the couch, the cat being set in his lap.

And then another thought came to Ryuji. For a guy who seemed to smoke so often, his house didn’t smell as horrible as Ryuji would have initially thought. It _did_ smell of cigarettes, but it wasn’t... Unbearable. More like just unpleasant. Maybe he only really smoked out on the fire escape. If anything, that would be a good idea to keep your home from smelling terrible.

He did spot an ashtray on the coffee table in front of them though, and it only had a few stray ashes in it, as well as one crushed cigarette. Hopefully he wouldn’t pull one out while Ryuji was sitting here. The blonde would likely rip it right out of his mouth if he did.

Glancing down to the cat in his neighbor’s lap as he draped an arm over the armrest, Ryuji did smile a little bit. It wasn’t like he didn't like cats. This one had just ran away from him their first meeting. Ryuji did love animals, though he preferred dogs. 

Reaching over though, and paying heed to the warning that his neighbor had given him their first time meeting, Ryuji let the cat sniff his hand, then slowly going in for a pet on his head. Surprisingly, for an “unfriendly” cat, he let him, though he didn’t lean into the petting either. He did seem content on his owner’s lap though, and he didn’t run away when his neighbor let go of him to pet his back.

“What’s his name?” Ryuji dared to ask, his gaze on the cat for a few more moments-- then glancing up to his neighbor.

His neighbor, meanwhile, was smiling as he looked to his cat. “Morgana.”

Morgana? What a weird name. Maybe he was really bad at picking out names, huh?

“Oh.” Ryuji wasn’t sure how to react to a name like that. It wasn’t really something he would ever imagine someone naming their cat. But to each his own… Right? “He’s cute.”

His neighbor chuckled a little bit. “Very.” 

So he was a cat kinda guy. In an odd sort of way, it seemed to fit him. It must be nice to have a pet though. He lived alone, so it was probably some good company. Ryuji had considered getting a pet as well, but… Well, he’d need something that was cheap and easy to take care of. Probably a goldfish. All he needed was a small tank, right? And a filter or something. It would be expensive at first, but… Well, he could barely take care of himself let alone something else. Maybe it was better he lived alone.

And now, with this new friend, maybe living here wouldn’t be nearly as lonely. Then again, was this guy his friend?

And then Ryuji pulled his hand away, setting it in his lap. He should at least warn his neighbor that he couldn’t stick around for too long, right? It was the polite thing to do, and he really couldn’t skip out on work. He couldn’t afford to.

“I can’t stay for long. I have work.” He was sure that his neighbor might look upset. It’d been a few days since they’d last seen each other, and his neighbor seemed pretty happy the last time they’d spent time together. 

“But you _did_ come to visit.” At least he seemed happy enough with what had already happened. Maybe Ryuji could live another day. But why did his mind constantly fall onto the topic of getting killed by his neighbor? He really needed to calm down.

Ryuji sighed. He really needed to relax. His neighbor was a totally normal guy. A little weird, but that was it.

“When do you have to go?”

He looked to his neighbor once more. He was looking at a watch on his wrist, but the face was… On the inside of his wrist? He was wearing it backwards. What was he, Ryuji’s grandmother? The blonde thought only old women wore the watch on the inside of their wrists. 

The watch was black in color, but Ryuji wasn’t close enough to see what it really looked like aside from that.

“Soon. Maybe a half an hour?” To give himself some time to get ready and then head to work in a reasonable amount of time. Granted, a half of an hour may have left a little too much time to get ready, but Ryuji did have to eat before he went to work. He couldn’t go on an empty stomach.

And for a moment he hoped that his neighbor might have some of that curry in his refrigerator or something. That shit was good.

But he wasn’t offered any curry. Instead, his neighbor looked to him again, his smile growing a little bit. That wide-eyed, curious look crossed his features again. It was like he actually enjoyed learning new things about Ryuji. Well, friends did that… Right? They learned about each other…

“What do you do?” For work? That was probably what he meant. 

“Oh, I, uh…” It was a little embarrassing. Wasn’t working at a convenience store for teenagers? Or at least people trying to get through college. It wasn’t like he was a manger or anything, but… Well, being a shift leader was impressive! Right?

Not really.

But he couldn’t just _not_ tell him. Or lie. It just… Wasn’t right.

“I just work at a store. I’m a shift leader.” He felt himself rubbing the back of his neck, his gaze falling to the coffee table in front of himself. Saying it out loud sounded even more lame. Hopefully he wouldn’t be criticized too harshly about it. Then again, this guy didn’t seem like someone who would do that kind of thing. “What about you?” Maybe getting the topic off of himself was a better option, right?

“Oh, I’m just a barista.” So he wasn’t anything exciting either, huh? But if he was just a barista, then why did all of his furniture look like it was so… Expensive? Maybe he was really good at thrifting or something. But it did still seem a little strange. 

His neighbor was looking down to the cat in his lap again, petting him a little bit. A silence fell over the pair for a few moments before his neighbor spoke again.

“At a cafe. You should come and visit!” It seemed like the idea excited his neighbor quite a bit. He really liked seeing Ryuji, huh? He was always inviting him over… “You’ll get more of that curry.”

Okay, that idea seemed really appealing now. That curry had been absolutely delicious. He may not get coffee there, but he was definitely thinking lunch. Or dinner. Depending on the time of day when he went.

“Sounds great!” Ryuji was smiling now, and his neighbor’s expression changed as well. He seemed just as happy, and he picked his cat up to cradle against his chest. Why did he always seem to look so adorable when he was excited? Ryuji didn’t think he’d ever understand the answer.

“It’s a small cafe,” his neighbor began, toying with one of the strangely compliant cat’s ears. Or at least he was compliant for a moment, soon pulling away and batting at the black-haired male’s fingers after. Poor thing. “It’s called Leblanc. It’s only a few blocks from here.”

So maybe this place was a good location. It meant a short trip to work from home, right? Ryuji wished that he didn’t have to ride a train to work every night. It sounded like it’d be a lot easier to just be able to walk straight there. And a lot less crowded as well.

He did decide that looking up the place was a good idea though. Tugging his phone from his pocket, Ryuji pulled up the internet page and then typed in the name for the cafe. Leblanc, huh? It sounded familiar. Maybe he’d seen it before. 

But his neighbor was right. It was really close by. It would be a quick trip. But it didn’t look familiar. Maybe he heard the name somewhere else… 

“Sure. One day. Soon though.” Ryuji said, looking to his neighbor once more. It’d be fun to try out a new place, right? And if all of the food and drinks were as good as that curry… 

His neighbor seemed pleased again. “Great. I work in the mornings. Until one-thirty.”

Okay, so maybe he’d have to go on one of his days off. He really didn’t like the idea of waking up early on a day that he had work to go out to get lunch. But he _did_ want to visit while his neighbor was working. Maybe he acted differently in a work environment?

“I’ll be by early then.” Ryuji said. But then a sudden feeling went rushing through his body and he stood up, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “I… Gotta use the bathroom. Mind if I swing into yours?” It was a perfectly reasonable question, right? There was no reason for him to go all the way to his place just to use the restroom. Not to mention he already knew exactly where it was.

His neighbor only nodded, motioning vaguely in the direction of the bathroom. After thanking him, Ryuji head over to it, having to walk around the bed to do so.

The bathroom was small, just as his own was. There wasn’t much room to move around, but there was enough to get your business done and get out. That was what a bathroom was for, right? However, this guy’s bathroom was a lot nicer and a lot more decorated than his own. The whole apartment seemed to have flowers all over the place, and the bathroom was no exception.

But after completing his business and washing his hands, Ryuji wandered back out into the main room. Something did catch his eye though.

On the ground beside the bed there was something by his feet. It looked sort of like a toothbrush. Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji bent down and picked up the item. “Hey, this thing fell on the ground.” He said, though upon looking more closely at it, it… Didn’t really look like a toothbrush. Not as much as he had initially thought, at least.

The part with the bristles was longer and thinner, and the handle was made of metal. What was really weird was that there were also bristles on the other end. There were much fewer though, and they were in a small, straight line. It didn’t look like a toothbrush that Ryuji had ever seen, but it looked more like it was… Made to clean something? Maybe he’d been cleaning up earlier, though Ryuji was sure it’d take a long time to clean anything of a substantial size with a brush so small.

His neighbor was by his side in what seemed to be a second though, taking the brush from his hand and stuffing it into his own pocket. “Oh, that’s _nothing_.” He insisted, laughing a little afterwards. But something about the laugh was a little off. It was a little… Nervous? Maybe it was a weird thing that he just didn’t want Ryuji to know about.

Or maybe he really was hiding something…

Either way, Ryuji laughed a bit nervously-- dryly, as well. His chuckle was much slower than his neighbor’s though. 

“Well, uh… It’s probably time I get home anyway. Work starts soon. Can’t be late.”

His neighbor was frowning again after that, his shoulders slumping a little. He seemed a little lost, but Ryuji really did have to leave. And not just because he was afraid.

“Oh. Okay. Come visit again soon?” The male asked as he followed Ryuji to the front door, holding it open for him.

“Yeah! Sure!” Ryuji was forcing a smile onto his lips. Something just seemed off about this guy, and as nice as he was, Ryuji just couldn’t place it. “I promise! Maybe at Leblanc though!” Meeting at a public place was probably the best idea. It was safer… Right?

And at that, his neighbor smiled again. It was soft and homely once more, and he leaned against the door frame with crossed arms. “I’ll hold you to that!”

And he watched Ryuji wander to the elevator before disappearing back into his home. Ryuji walked as calmly as he could back to the elevator, but as soon as the doors were closed behind him, he sighed in relief. Something wasn’t right about his neighbor. His kind, generous, and creepy neighbor. 

But, more than he was worried about his safety, he wanted to know what this other guy was trying to hide.


	5. Cafe Leblanc

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I spent quite a bit of time color-coding and organizing the events of this story's contents and notes the last few days. I have all of my ideas so far typed up so that I know what order I want to do everything in, but then I realized that there's quite a bit of time between this chapter and what I'd like to have happen next.
> 
> That being said, I need to figure out if I want something to happen between now and then, or if I'd like to do a little bit of a time skip. I'm sure I'll think of something! 
> 
> Anyway, enjoy the chapter!

So Ryuji had learned two things about his neighbor. He worked at a cafe, and he was hiding something.

He didn’t know much about his personality, aside from the fact that he liked when he had visitors, he liked his cat, and he liked to smoke. He didn’t have an age. He didn’t have a past. He didn’t have a name.

But Ryuji wanted to know more. He wanted to know who this mysterious guy that lived below him really was. And he really wanted to know what he was hiding. Even though it did scare him quite a bit.

But his curiosity did get the better of him, and it was what brought the blonde to the cafe his neighbor, now, so frequently spoke about when they were together. It had been a couple of weeks since his visit to the other male’s place (aside from their recurrent meetings on the firescape after Ryuji got home from work), and he thought it may be time for him to check the place out.

Who knew? Maybe he’d learn the guy’s name by going there. He certainly knew Ryuji’s.

But they certainly had been spending quite a bit of time together since the last meeting. Almost every morning, really. Well, before his neighbor had to head off to work for the day. Ryuji hadn’t been back to visit his neighbor’s apartment, nor did he let him come into his own place. But they did sit outside on the firescape often. 

They spoke about the city, about missing Japan, and about how Ryuji was glad he’d finally made a friend that he could feel comfortable speaking around. Because that’s what they were, right? _Friends_.

Even if Ryuji was trying to investigate this guy pretty heavily. He did everything he could to try and get some sort of answers or hints out of him. Anything to try and learn at least a _little_ something out of him.

But, standing in front of Cafe Leblanc, Ryuji wasn’t sure if just finding out about his neighbor was the only reason that he actually wanted to come here.

That curry. It had been heaven. An angelic explosion in his mouth. And he missed it.

His neighbor still needed to fulfill his promise of giving him more anyway. What a slacker.

But before he could turn tail and run out of his own fear, Ryuji slipped into the cafe. A bell above the door jingled as he closed it behind himself. It was a small cafe with only a few tables. Ryuji didn’t bother counting them, but they sat on the left side of the room, booths lining the walls with them. A bar was on the right hand side, and behind that was a wall filled with jars of what looked to be coffee beans and instruments for extracting the flavors from them. Along with stacks of plates and bowls, and rows of coffee mugs.

The colors remained neutral-- browns and tans. That was nothing special.

But overall, the cafe seemed quaint. It was small and Ryuji was feeling rather… At home. At _peace_ even. 

The smell of coffee filled the air, and there was an underlying scent of spices that made Ryuji’s stomach growl with anticipation.

“Welcome.” English.

Looking to the bar, Ryuji was greeted by an older male. He had a well-trimmed beard and there were wrinkles at the corners of his eyes, and his arms appeared to be folded on top of the bar that he leaned upon.

Motioning vaguely to the tables on the other side of the bar from himself, he allowed a small smile to weave onto his lips. It seemed like he was putting on a good customer service face, huh?

“Find yourself a spot. I’ll send my waiter over to get your order when he’s done.” 

Looking back to the tables, Ryuji thought for a moment. Which one should he sit in? Close to the door, or…

Glancing towards the back of the open room, he spotted his neighbor at one of the far tables. He was leaning over it, a rag in his hand as he scrubbed at what Ryuji assumed was some spilled food. The blonde had never seen him so focused on something. It was strange. But he did look up from the table, his head tilting towards Ryuji.

The small smile that was on his face only grew at the sight of the blonde, and he flashed him the number one with his fingers. Telling Ryuji to wait a minute, huh? Fine with him. It wasn’t like he had anywhere to be tonight. He had off, and he would use the excuse of trying to fill the time somehow as his excuse. He couldn’t just come out and say he was here to investigate, right?

And after that, his neighbor slipped into a room behind the bar with his rag.

But what better place to sit than the booth next to himself? Slipping into it, Ryuji set his hands on top of the table and folded them. “Thanks.” He finally said in response to the older male’s request. He received a hum in response. 

The cafe was rather quiet. There was music playing-- smooth jazz maybe? Ryuji couldn’t quite place it. But it wasn’t unpleasant. It was soothing, really.

Looking into the distance, there was a television in the back of the room. From the black blocks on the bottom of the screen that changed to various sizes and disappeared, Ryuji ssumed the subtitles were on. He was far too distant to be able to read them, but it looked like the news was on. Nothing he wanted to pay attention to anyway.

And then he looked to the cafe again. Old, but colorful lamps hung from the ceiling above each table, and the light coming from them was dim. It wasn’t bright in the cafe at all, and it added to it’s calming atmosphere. Warm. Ryuji suddenly felt warmth spreading through his body. What a nice place to be on a cool Autumn day, right?

And before he knew it, his neighbor was at his table, drying his hands on the green apron that hung around his body. “Ryuji!” He said, grinning widely. 

Hearing his name come from the other male’s lips did not make Ryuji feel all that comfortable. In fact, he shuddered at the word as it had been spoken.

“Treat a friend like a customer.” It was that obvious they knew each other, huh? The man behind the counter seemed ready to lecture Ryuji’s neighbor in an instant. It had the blonde chuckling.

And his neighbor turned around to face his boss, holding up one finger and pressing it to his lips as if telling the older male to hush. “Japanese.”

The man seemed pleased with the statement, looking to Ryuji again, and this time he spoke to him in Japanese. “Don’t let him slack off too much. He’s still at work, you know.”

Ryuji had no intention of bothering his neighbor too much. The guy was right. He was at work. And Ryuji really wanted some lunch. 

Turning back to face him, his neighbor put his hands on his hips. “Coffee?” He didn’t seem to be talkative today, huh? Not as talkative as he usually was, at least. 

But Ryuji draped one of his arms over the back of the booth as he sat back, folding one of his legs on top of the other. “Ah, no. No thanks.” He said. The smile he wore softened a little. Maybe it was about time to come clean, huh? He’d had a lot of cups of coffee with the other male, but he was really getting sick of it. In fact, he wasn’t sure how much more of it he could handle. 

His neighbor looked confused though. He had one eyebrow raised, and his head tilted sideways ever-so-slightly. He was pouting as well, and for a moment Ryuji was stunned by just how adorable his neighbor looked. 

He could slap himself. This was no time to be having weird thoughts about his equally as weird neighbor. Remember. He was hiding something.

“I, uh,” just say it, Ryuji. “I don’t actually like coffee.” He was chuckling, the hand that once remained on the table now rubbing the back of his neck. Hopefully that didn’t upset the other male or anything. “I’ll take hot chocolate though! If ya have it.”

And then his neighbor’s eyes widened at the realization. Ryuji assumed that he felt bad for constantly giving him coffee, but… Well, Ryuji could have turned it down. So, it was really his own fault. 

But then his neighbor smiled again and nodded in understanding. “Curry?”

Oh, he did _not_ have to ask twice. 

“Yeah! Sounds great!” He had to tell himself not to sound too desperate for that part.

It was an easy enough order though, right? Hot chocolate and curry. A weird combination, but it would probably be really good. Besides. What kind of cafe specialized in coffee and curry as a combination anyway? They were bound to get requests that were just as strange.

Nodding, his neighbor opened his mouth to say something when he was interrupted once more. 

“If you’ve got this, I’m going on a break.” The male behind the counter stuffed something into his pocket before walking around and out the door, leaving the door jingling behind him.

Ryuji and his neighbor both watched, and then the blonde heard the other male sigh before looking back at him once again.

“Sorry about him.” Despite his words, his neighbor was smiling. “He’s forgotten manners in his old age.”

Ryuji couldn’t help but chuckle though. With how much the older male had been interrupting his neighbor, he could believe it. Or maybe he was just making sure that his neighbor stayed in his place. 

Either way, Ryuji hoped he wasn’t doing it out of spite. His neighbor didn’t look upset, so he wondered if the two were close. 

“It’s fine I should be apologizin’ to you.” He said, motioning to the other male with one hand. “With how he treats ya…” Maybe at least he could know how his neighbor felt through a comment like that… right?

“Don’t worry about it.” He was still smiling. “Boss is like a father to me. He looks out for me.”

 _Boss_?

What? Was he not allowed to know the name of his neighbor’s boss? Was that supposed to be hidden from him as well? Did he know _Ryuji’s_ name too? But the blonde wasn’t allowed to know _his_? Why didn’t anyone want him to know their names?

Well, he never asked.

“Boss?” Maybe it’d be a one way ticket to finding out his neighbor’s name by segwaying through his boss.

His neighbor turned towards the bar, wandering over to it and slipping behind it. To one of the machines he went, picking up a mug from below it and setting it on the counter. It looked like he got back to work. But he was still pretty close by. The place wasn’t big, after all.

“Yeah. Prefers it over ‘Sojiro’.” His neighbor said, filling the mug from a jug of milk. He then set it onto the machine and pressed a button-- the machine booting up and making a rather loud sound. Ryuji wasn’t sure what it was doing, but it sounded like it was forcing air into the drink.

At least he had one name though.

The black-haired male removed the mug from the machine once the noise stopped, and set it below a small container with a pump. Ryuji assumed it was chocolate from the liquid that was pumped out of it.

Then, escaping into the back room once again, Ryuji was left alone. Wait. Wasn’t he supposed to ask about his neighbor’s name next? Ryuji had been so focused on watching him work that he’d completely forgotten to ask. Way to go.

Frowning, Ryuji slumped back in the booth.

But his neighbor returned with a bowl-- steam rising from it’s contents, and he’d completely forgotten about his disappointment after that. _Curry_. The curry was back. And he couldn’t wait to try some while it was hot.

Still, he had to ask about his name before he forgot again.

“Hey, so…” He began, folding his hands on top of the table once more and trying to hide the excitement for the food in his voice. “You know, I never caught _your_ name. You know mine, but I guess I just… Never asked.” Play it cool, right? That was the correct way to go about it.

His neighbor seemed shocked though. Had he really not known that Ryuji had no idea what his name was? Wide-eyed, he blinked. His neighbor was so expressive, really, that Ryuji could picture exactly what he was feeling. It was a relief, since he tended to be pretty unpredictable. Ryuji had to know what he was thinking somehow, right?

A quick stir of a spoon in Ryuji’s mug and his neighbor was smiling again, soft and warm. Though, after that, the mug disappeared under the counter for a bit. Ryuji assumed that something else was being added to it. Maybe a secret ingredient? “Forgive me. It’s--” 

And then there was the familiar jingle of the door opening, and his neighbor seemed to have been distracted by whomever entered the building.

 _Shit_.

“Welcome to Leblanc!” He was never going to learn his neighbor’s name, was he?

“Why are you acting like I’m a customer?” The voice was recognizable as the owner of the cafe, and turning towards the door, arm draped over the back of the booth again, proved that Ryuji was right. Guess he was back after his break.

“You said to treat my friends like customers.” Well, he wasn’t wrong. Ryuji could recount that conversation from earlier.

“You don’t have to be such a brat all the time.” He seemed rather annoyed, but made no threat against his neighbor. Instead, he just wandered to one of the seats in front of the bar and sat down.

“What can I get for you, _sir_?” His neighbor asked as he leaned forward, resting his chin on his hand at the bar. He was smirking, obviously toying with his boss. 

He was really comfortable, wasn’t he? Ryuji would never dare toy with his own boss like that. They seemed… Really close for a boss and employee kind of relationship. Was everything about this guy weird? Probably.

“Cheeky.” He sounded just as annoyed as before.”Make me my coffee.” He paused as he picked up a magazine that was on the bar, flipping it open to about the midpoint before he looked up again at his subordinate. “A-and make it right this time!”

Chuckling, Ryuji’s neighbor picked up Ryuji’s mug and walked around the bar, eventually placing both items on the table in front of the blonde. “Coming right up!” And then he was looking down at Ryuji, though the blonde didn’t notice. He was too busy staring at the delicious-looking curry that sat before himself on the table top. 

“Here you are. Enjoy.”He turned away, Ryuji catching sight of him as he quickly turned and motioned to the mug. “Oh. You might want to stir that again before drinking it.” And he was off and behind the counter once more, getting to work on his boss’ order.

Ryuji had to admit, as he picked up a spoon from the table, that it was pretty funny to see his neighbor acting so casual and playful when it wasn’t towards him. It was pretty charming, in a sassy, slick sort of way. But only when it was geared towards someone else.

Despite being pretty excited for the hot chocolate though, Ryuji was _more_ excited for his curry. That was definitely what he was going to be starting with. 

Filling his spoon with a little bit of rice and then with some of the curry, Ryuji quickly popped the food into his mouth. And it was pure bliss.

Humming, Ryuji chewed and then swallowed before working on another bite. Seriously. The curry this guy, ‘Boss’, made was _so_ good. Ryuji was surprised that the restaurant was deserted. Everyone should know just how good his cooking was. But then again, it might be a little bit overwhelming. And Ryuji would probably have had to wait a long time to get any-- if he’d even think to try it out, that was.

But the cafe was completely empty, save for the three of them. Ryuji thought it would at least have a few people inside if the food was this good.

It was pretty spicy though. Ryuji could recall that it ha been before as well, but this seemed… A little more so. Were there other types of curry in the back room as well? And if so, why hadn’t he been given a choice? 

But, in the end, Ryuji didn’t really care. This was delicious whether he could try another flavor or not.

“Enjoying it?” Ryuji hadn’t realized how distracted he’d been until he heard his neighbor’s voice once more. Looking up from the table, he spotted the other male with one hand on his hip, looking down at Ryuji with a smile. “Your hot chocolate is getting cold.”

A glass of water was placed next to his hot chocolate. It was like his neighbor was reading his mind. Thankfully, it was a soothing feeling on his burning tongue. For the moment that it was moving. But Ryuji would suffer happily knowing that he’d been able to eat more of the curry.

Placing the glass down, he nodded at his friend, then opening his mouth to speak.

“R-right.” He muttered as he then looked to his hot chocolate. He had… Mixed feelings about it. It might be soothing to his tongue on one hand, but on the other hand, the warmth might make the pain a little more intense. 

Then again, his neighbor had made it for him. And Ryuji was going to have to pay for it whether he drank it or not. So he might as well take a hit for the team, right? If the ‘team’ was his pocket.

He picked up the mug, looking inside. He’d been told to mix it up a little bit more before he drank, so he did just that. The chocolate beverage inside looked pretty frothy, and Ryuji wondered if it was from the machine that was sitting atop the bar. Maybe it had been heating up the milk? Adding steam, or something. Ryuji didn’t know much about coffee shops, but he figured he knew the basics.

“It’s great!” And, surprisingly, it didn’t burn his tongue when he’d taken a sip. It was a little warm, but it also soothed. Strange, but maybe the water helped a little bit as well. Man, his neighbor really knew how to make some good hot chocolate though.

“Thanks. I put some love into it.” A wink. _He winked_. What in the world was that supposed to mean? The gesture had Ryuji pausing in the middle of taking a second sip. Did he _want_ to take another sip? The glint in his neighbor’s eyes said he really shouldn’t.

But, reluctantly, Ryuji took the sip, then placing the mug down on the table once again. His neighbor was kind. Right? There was no way he’d do anything weird to Ryuji’s drink. Or at least that was what Ryuji really wanted to believe.

His neighbor clearly caught onto the blonde’s hesitation though, chuckling as he slipped into the booth across from Ryuji. “Don’t worry. It’s clean.”

Ryuji could sigh in relief. But he was correct. His neighbor would never hurt him like that. Hopefully. He was still on the fence about that.

It didn’t take Ryuji long to finish his meal though, and having his neighbor there to sit with him when he wasn’t cleaning or taking care of one or two strangers that wandered in with the hopes of buying coffee was nice. Strange as it was, his neighbor was good at conversation. Even if it was mostly Ryuji talking-- mostly complaining about work, or his apartment. But his neighbor listened with open ears and seemed interested enough. It was the most attention Ryuji had had in a long while.

And even after he was done, Ryuji stayed a little longer than he’d intended. Watching his neighbor with his Boss was more fun than he’d like to admit. 

But it was getting late, and it was about time Ryuji headed out. He really did still have to purchase a new pair of shoes for work…

But as he sat at the table across from his neighbor, something occurred to the blonde. There was something that he needed to know that had been eating away at him for such a long time now. His name.

So, fiddling with the water glass that was in front of himself, Ryuji glanced up at his neighbor, a frown on his face. It seemed like the change of atmosphere had been noticed-- the black haired male was frowning now as well. Ryuji didn’t _mean_ to bring the mood down, but it was important. Finding out how his neighbor knew his name was burning at his skin like a constant itch. 

Biting his lip for a moment, Ryuji took a deep breath. He wasn’t sure that he’d like the answer that he was going to get from his question, but it was better to know than to be left in the dark, right? How could a perfect stranger know exactly what his name was?

“I wanted to ask you something.” He said, thumbs pressing against the cold glass of water-- drawing small impressions in the condensation. His neighbor’s head tilted to the side a little bit in curiosity, and Ryuji willed up the nerve to finally ask. “How did you know my name? I never told you.”

“Oh?” The look on his neighbors face suddenly changed. From confusion and maybe a little bit of apprehension to a sly smirk. He leaned forward, chin in one upturned hand as he leaned on the table. His gaze narrowed, and Ryuji recognized the look as the one he’d been given the first time his name had been used. Hair standing on edge like it had before, Ryuji slumped back against his seat a little bit. He didn’t like that look at all. It seemed akin to the look that a cat would give a mouse once it had been cornered. Ryuji felt defenseless, and he contemplated getting up and leaving without his answer.

But what good would that do? He’d been hoping for this answer, and it’d been bothering him so much that he needed to know. But something about his neighbor did concern him. He just… Wasn’t normal. As kind and child-like he appeared at times, he was still hiding something from the blonde. And Ryuji _hated_ it.

“It was easy.” He said, his smirk only growing. It fueled to make Ryuji even more uncomfortable. “I received some of your mail.”

_What?_

Some of his mail?

Oh. Of _course_. It wasn’t like it was unheard of to be given the wrong mail. Ryuji had gotten the mail of his neighbors a few times since he’d moved into the apartment. Really? Why had that thought never occurred to him? It seemed like such a simple and logical conclusion, and he honestly felt a little stupid not having thought of that sooner. In fact, he felt like an idiot. He could slap himself for that. But now seemed like the perfect time to ask something else. 

“One more thing.” Ryuji still couldn’t place why his neighbor always looked so suspicious like he did. He didn’t like it, but he couldn’t just _make_ his neighbor act differently. Still, he needed to know his name as well. “Your, uh… Your name.”

And then his neighbor was smiling fondly again, eyes widening back like they usually were. His whole demeanor could change in the blink of an eye. Ryuji could practically feel the whiplash already.

“It’s Ren.” 

Finally. A name to a face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I had to hit Ctrl+F to make sure I wasn't using Ren's name up until now. Wanted to keep that a secret up until the reveal! Have a great day!


	6. Beauty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you couldn’t tell by now, I’m terrible at naming both stories and chapters.
> 
> Enjoy!

In the end, Ryuji had stayed at the cafe so long that Ren was finishing up his shift soon after. He decided to stick around for that small bit of time to walk home with the other male. It was the polite thing to do, right?

And he could wait a little bit longer to get some new shoes too, right? 

He really should get those, but when your laziness was literally finding excuses to not make responsible decisions, it was tough. Ryuji would have to force himself to go to the store at some point, but for now his neighbor was more important.

And so was trying to learn more about him.

Stuffing his hands inside his pockets, Ryuji glanced to the buildings as they passed by them. He’d walked through the city so many times, but he’d never really wandered down the back alleys like the one that Leblanc was on. It really was pretty tucked back into a corner, and perhaps that was the reason it didn’t receive that much business. It was like a diamond in the rough, really. 

If the rough could be considered the back alleys of New York City.

But there were a lot of places on the back streets that Ryuji had never seen. Restaurants, a small grocery store, a medical practice… He had no idea these places even existed-- let alone consider that they were so close to his apartment. 

He’d have to keep that grocery store in mind. Maybe he could check to see if they had kyoho. He hadn’t had any since he left Japan, and he really did miss the giant grapes.

Ren had been pretty quiet since they left the cafe. White plastic bag in one hand, his other tapped away at the screen on his phone. He was likely texting someone, so Ryuji didn’t want to bother him. He didn’t want to think that Ren thought it safe to text and walk at the same time, but once they reached the end of the alley, he did stop to look both ways before they crossed the road. Okay. Maybe he was a little bit more responsible than Ryuji took him for.

Even though it was a one way road.

The air was cool and it stung Ryuji’s nose a little bit. He’d considered wearing a heavier coat before leaving the house, but ultimately he’d decided against it. Winter was fast approaching though, so he’d have to be more cautious about his choice of jacket in the near future. He’d also have to turn on the heat in his apartment at some point. He wouldn’t be able to sleep if it was too cold.

But despite his own sniffling, Ren didn’t seem to be too affected by the cold. He was wandering around in a blazer. Granted, Ryuji’s hoodie probably wasn’t that much better, but Ryuji was pretty chilly. Even in the middle of the day. Then again, the city was really windy despite all of the buildings. It was like they created a wind tunnel or something.

Taking the time to zip up his hoodie, Ryuji slipped his hands back into the pockets afterwards. Maybe it would be time for some gloves soon too. His fingers were cold. Ren’s were probably more so since he didn’t have them in his pockets.

They waited at one of the lights as there was a bit of traffic, Ryuji rocking back and forth on his feet. Waiting was always a pain in the ass, but he’d rather take survival over getting hit by a car.

But as he waited, Ryuji suddenly felt the hair on the back of his neck standing up. Was he being watched? He felt like it. And glancing to Ren verified that he was. Smiling at him, Ren seemed perfectly okay with being caught staring. It had Ryuji’s cheeks turning pink as he looked in front of himself again, slouching down a little bit.

His neighbor was so casual about everything, huh?

“You look cold.” He suddenly heard the other male say.

“Huh? Uh, yeah. A little.” Ryuji didn’t want to just admit that he was cold like that, but he’d been caught. He couldn’t really lie or anything. But they’d be home soon, right?

The light changed to green, and as soon as it did, the pair wandered into the street and began to cross. 

“I should have made you some hot chocolate to go.” Ren was chuckling a little bit. But the idea of having something warm to drink for the walk home sounded pretty nice. It would have warmed him up a little bit, right? And at least one of his hands would be kept warm at a time.

“It’s okay.” He was smiling though. It was nice to have someone trying to look out for his well being. “The walk isn’t that far. ‘Cept I used a different way to get there.” They were walking through a lot of backstreets to get to the apartment building. On Ryuji’s way to the cafe, his phone had taken him on the busier roads. But he assumed that Ren knew his way around the area a lot better.

“The alleys are faster.” Ryuji assumed. Still, they were passing by so many places that Ryuji had never known existed that he really thought he’d have to check even more back alleys. Maybe he’d find some other shops that he could go into. He’d been pretty stuck to his usual few stores. Really, when there was no one to wander around the city with, his findings were limited. It was much more fun to have a friend walking with you.

Looking to the building that currently stood beside them as they walked, Ryuji noticed that it was made of brick. It wasn’t unheard of in the city, but it was pretty strange to see when most buildings were made of stone and concrete.

So focused on the windows and the architecture of the building, Ryuji didn’t look back in front of himself again until he heard a voice.

“Ren!” It was a female’s voice. Soft and rather mature sounding, Ryuji glanced ahead of them to spot the woman in question. She had narrow eyes, and her long black hair was cute straight. A long pin was stuffed into the side of her hair and she wore a rather warm smile upon her face. She was dressed much more appropriately for the weather in her jacket and scarf than Ryuji or Ren had dared to dress, but Ryuji found himself distracted by her face.

She was the most beautiful woman he’d ever seen. It was thin and mature, and her smile was just so sweet. Ryuji could feel his cheeks turning pink again.

And she knew Ren? If she was his girlfriend, he was a lucky guy…

Ryuji hadn’t even noticed that he ad Ren had stopped walking.

“Hifumi.” He heard Ren say before looking over to his neighbor. He was smiling as well, and for a moment Ryuji frowned.

This ‘Hifumi’ was beautiful, but Ren was also a good looking guy. It was no secret, and Ryuji would openly admit that about his neighbor. They certainly looked like they would be an attractive couple, and Ryuji sort of felt a little bit jealous. But… He wasn’t sure if he was jealous of him, or of _her_. 

But it was only about their looks, right? Dating his neighbor was a no go. But having a beautiful girlfriend or boyfriend was definitely something Ryuji would look forward to.

If he could ever find one. It felt like he’d have to head all the way back to Japan just to find someone who wanted to date him. But he was not like a scared puppy. He refused to move all the way back home just because he couldn’t land himself a date.

“It’s good to see you again!” The female was talking again, and Ryuji’s gaze fell back onto her just in time to spot her returning his look. “Who’s your friend?”

Ryuji could see that Ren was motioning to him from the corner of his eye. “This is Ryuji. He’s my neighbor.

Pushing some of her hair behind one ear, Hifumi’s smile only grew a bit. “Oh? It’s nice to finally meet you.” Her hand was extended in the blonde’s direction, and Ryuji took it without a second thought-- shaking it and flashing the female a smile. She seemed nice.

“Ren speaks about you often.” Wait. What? He did?

Looking over to his neighbor, Ryuji swore he could spot a pink tint to his cheeks. Was Ren blushing? Maybe from his exposure. But Ryuji had no idea that he was spoken about outside of the few conversations that he’d had with Ren.

But apparently he was noted enough that someone actually knew, and _remembered_ , his name. 

Ren was avoiding eye contact with him. There was no way he wasn’t embarrassed about being called out.

As she chuckled, Ryuji’s attention was drawn back to Hifumi. She looked back to Ren once more though. Gosh, her smile was so pretty. Ryuji felt himself blushing again, his face turning pink. He was most certainly staring. But could you blame him? 

“Ren, you haven’t come to play shogi in such a long time. You won’t get any better if you don’t work harder.”

Shogi?

Ren was chuckling after that, and he rubbed the back of his neck. “Sorry.”

Shogi.

Hifumi was looking to Ryuji once more. “Do you play? Ren’s pretty hopeless at it, so it’d be nice to find someone who could hold their own against me.” There was a playful glint in her eyes. She didn’t seem to be insulting Ren, but more so toying with him. Ha. Finally there was someone who could get a rise out of Ryuji’s neighbor. It was about time.

However, the question caught Ryuji’s attention. Did he play shogi? Yeah! He did!

He was smiling and he nodded. “Yeah! I used to play all the time with my mom.” And he liked to think that he was pretty good at it. Maybe not the best, but he certainly wasn’t _bad_. 

Hifumi seemed pleased with his answer. “We should play sometime then. I’ll need some help teaching _him_.” Another jab at Ren. He didn’t seem to mind though, instead just chuckling a bit to himself.

It was strange to be running into someone they knew on the streets though. Still, it might be more common for Ren to know others since he seemed to know the place well, but what was the chance that they’d just happen upon someone that Ren knew out of nowhere like this?

Either way, he should probably answer the female.

“Sure! Anytime!” Making friends was a good idea, right? Ryuji was tired of spending so much time alone. He wanted to be able to hang out with other people on his days off. Don’t get him wrong though-- Ren was a nice guy, but the more friends the merrier, right? And if he could build up a friend group, that meant more people to hang out with at a time and less time being spent lonely.

“Wonderful. Well,” she began, looking back and forth between the two. “I’ve wasted enough of your time. I’ll see you both again later.” She certainly was nice, huh?

“You’re not wasting our time. It was nice seeing you again.” Ren’s hands slipped into the pockets of his jeans as he shifted on his feet. 

And after their goodbyes were said, the two were on their way home once again. 

Hifumi had been so kind to Ryuji, despite her harsh but playful words to Ren. Ryuji thought it was pretty funny, and he did want to know a little bit more. What were Ren’s relationships with other people? Aside from his relationship with Ryuji, the blonde really didn’t know much.

Ren got along with his boss, despite the fact that Ren was a little shit. His friend(?) Hifumi teased Ren a bit and was not afraid to insult him, but Ren totally deserved it. But what about everyone else? Or did Ren not really know other people? But if that were the case, running into Hifumi on the way home was even more strange.

“She’s nice.” Ryuji suddenly found himself saying as he kicked at a crushed soda can on the sidewalk. He hated the idea of littering, but there was no recycling bin nearby. He’d just pick it up when he spotted one to throw it away.

“Yeah.” Ren didn’t elaborate at first, but Ryuji could feel his eyes on himself. Ren was likely looking at him-- maybe judging for a reaction from him. “She’s pretty, huh?”

Did he know that Ryuji had been staring at her? Sure, it probably wasn’t all that subtle, but he didn’t think that it was _that_ obvious either.

Ryuji just hummed in response. “Yeah. Cute.” But he did look to Ren after that, smiling again. “Are you and her a thing? You looked pretty close!”

Ren chuckled a little bit at that, covering his mouth with one hand. He did that a lot, huh? It must have been a habit. 

But he shook his head. “No, we’re nothing like that.” Oh. So they weren’t dating. But Ryuji did wonder if Ren was single. A good looking guy like him? Probably not. Not to mention he was cool, sly… He probably had a thousand people trying to get his attention. Ryuji wouldn’t be surprised.

Though he wasn’t looking to be one of those people. As much as he was attracted to the other male, that was it. They were _friends_. They were _neighbors_. And as easily as Ryuji developed crushes on anyone who he deemed remotely attractive (which was a _lot_ of people), he really wasn’t trying to fall in love with Ren. 

Great buddies? Yes. Nothing more. And he was hoping it would be nothing less either. As long as he could trust him, of course.

And then Ren was smirking at him again. His smile was sharp and very cat-like. Gosh, did he really have to look at Ryuji like that all the time?It made him uncomfortable! It was like he could see right through the blonde, and it always made Ryuji’s blood turn cold. What a weird guy…

“Why?” He asked, pressing a finger to his lips. Stop it. “Are you jealous?”

Jealous? Of _what_? Of course not! He wasn’t jealous of her in the slightest! He and Ren were _friends_. However?

Scoffing, Ryuji allowed a smirk of his own to weave onto his lips. Hifumi sure did it, right? So Ryuji could try and learn to toy around with the other male as well. 

“If you were together? Yeah. Of _you_.” Sneaking a glance in Ren’s direction, Ryuji noticed that the other male seemed to be pouting. Success! He wasn’t always going to get a rise out of Ryuji-- not when the blonde was clever enough to allow himself the upper hand at times. 

This was retaliation. 

Ren didn’t seem upset though. Instead, Ryuji felt a shove on his shoulder and he stumbled a little bit, his facade fading as he chuckled. 

They really seemed to be getting along well, as strange as it were. It really was weird though. Something about Ren felt so at home and so comfortable. They’d only known each other for a short amount of time, But something felt odd about Ren, and it wasn’t the fact that he was clearly hiding something from him.

It was just how comfortable Ryuji felt at times like this. It felt like he’d known Ren for years, but… He knew nothing _about_ him. The air of mystery was what really scared Ryuji about the other male. He _hated_ feeling like the was left in the dark.

But he was sure that he’d learn, one day, just what was behind his mysterious neighbor, and why he acted the way he did.

Ryuji was suddenly brought out of his thoughts by another voice, someone else calling out Ren’s name. In the near distance, he could spot someone waving-- a _male_ this time. 

_Really_? Again?

“You sure know a lot of people, huh?” Ryuji asked as they paused once more, a frown on his face. He was really starting to get chilly by now, and he desperately wanted to get home. Maybe a nice, hot bath was in order.

“You have no idea.”

No, Ryuji had no clue what he was getting himself into.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In my youth I too ate many a Kyoho grape. I miss them dearly. I can definitely relate to your feelings, Ryuji.


	7. Old Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I felt like the last chapter was pretty lame, so I wanted to get another one out as soon as possible. I’m much happier with this one! Enjoy!

Since his first trip to Leblanc, winter was fast approaching. It was nearing the middle of November. Everyone was readying themselves for Christmas, which Ryuji didn’t really bother celebrating, and for the cold weather.

By now one could see their breath in the air while they were outside. Temperatures had drastically dropped, and Ryuji was making sure to keep bundled up whenever he left the apartment. He really didn’t want to catch a cold or anything. He did feel bad for Ren though.

Sitting out on the fire escape every morning meant he was out braving the cold. Ryuji hadn’t been out there to speak with him in a long while, instead opting to just poke his head out of his own window to greet his neighbor with a good morning. Still, the weather didn’t seem to faze the way the black haired male felt about sitting outside, and it sure didn’t deter his brat feline from sitting out there with him whenever Ryuji went to say hello.

Time passed by quickly and a lot less lonely since Ryuji made friends with not only Ren, but the few people he’d met through his neighbor. Hifumi sure was nice a lot of the times that they’d managed to run into each other on the street, and Sojiro-- _Boss_ was a pretty cool guy as well. He was a little behind on times, but he was kind nonetheless.

Thinking about Boss had gotten Ryuji thinking though. Another trip to Leblanc was a necessity. It’d been a little bit of time since he’d been able to stop in for some curry and maybe a hot chocolate, so the blonde took to the streets and head for his destination.

It sure was cold though. And it was only bound to get worse as winter began.

Tugging the front of his jacket above his chin, Ryuji tried to shrink in on himself a little bit to keep his warmth as contained as it could be given the situation. His hands were in his pockets as he walked, and he shivered slightly. Ugh. He really wasn’t fond of the cold.

Unless it was snowing. That was a completely different scenario.

Ice was forming on a lot of things though. In the mornings there was frost on the cars, and Ryuji could spot icicles forming on different buildings and structures. It looked like winter was coming early, huh?

He hoped he didn’t slip on the ice that formed on the sidewalks overnight. 

The sudden vibration of the cell phone in his pocket caught Ryuji’s attention though, and it caused him to straighten out a bit. Huh? Who was texting him now? Ren was at the cafe, an he was sure none of his coworkers would take the time to text him. Protocol meant a phone call if Ryuji was needed.

Reaching into the pocket of his jeans, Ryuji tugged out his phone. The screen was still lit up as it notified him of the message that had been received. 

It was an unknown number. Ryuji couldn’t recognise it off of the top of his head either. Weird. And he could only see the first part of the message that had been sent.

_Hello, Ryuji. This is…_

The message was cut off and he was unable to see just who it was from. At least it was someone who knew his number though, so he wouldn’t have to tell anyone that they had the wrong number.

He punched in his passcode, and his phone gave him access to what was inside. Bringing up his texts, Ryuji brought up the one from the mystery person.

_Hello, Ryuji. This is Hifumi. I asked Ren for your phone number._

Oh. _Hifumi_. Well, it would be much easier to contact her now. They wouldn’t have to rely on running into each other on the streets. 

Smiling a little bit to himself, Ryuji quickly typed back a message in return.

_Sup! ;P Good to hear from u!_

There was nothing wrong with adding an emoji in there, right? A little text speak too. Or was that too immature for someone his age? Oh well. There was no turning back now, as he’d already sent the message. Ryuji quickly saved the female’s number into his contacts, and by the time he was finished, there was already a response. 

_It’s nice to speak with you as well. I was wondering if you’d like to meet for shogi sometime soon?_

Oh. Shogi? _Right_. Hifumi loved shogi! She talked about it often, and Ryuji had promised on multiple occasions that he would play with her. Not that she seemed too persistent. Ryuji had offered it to her a few times by now as well.

_Sure! Hmu anytime! :)_

And though he felt that she responded a few moments later, Ryuji had made it to Leblanc in one piece. Hell, talking to Hifumi had him forgetting the cold. But he did decide to respond to her after he’d sat down and gotten himself comfortable.

Reaching out and taking the door knob in hand, Ryuji made his way into the cafe. He was greeted by a sudden rush of heat (oh, it was so nice and warm inside), and the scent of coffee brewing. Ah, home. This place felt so much like what a home should feel like.

“Welcome!” He was greeted by Boss, who was standing behind the counter with his arms crossed. He _was_ smiling though. Ren seemed to be sitting at the counter though, leaning back and flashing a wave to his neighbor with a smile as well. But something-- or rather _someone_ else was what really caught the blonde’s attention. 

Sitting at the counter, closer to him than Ren was, happened to be a girl. She had long dull-blonde hair, and she seemed to be hovering over a cup of coffee. It was not unusual, but something about her seemed so… _Familiar_.

It seemed like the female felt that she’d been stared at, and she glanced over in Ryuji’s direction.

And then it hit him. It hit him like a ton of bricks. 

This girl-- this beautiful _woman_ , he knew her. Ann. _Ann Takamaki_.

“Ann?”

“Ryuji?”

Swallowing a lump in his throat, Ryuji didn’t even register that his phone was falling from his hand and to the floor until the sound of it crashing against the wood hit his ears. 

“Shit!” He cursed under his breath as he leaned down, picking up his phone. Checking over the screen for any signs of cracking, he could breathe a sigh of relief that it was safe. 

“Oh?” Boss was talking. He had raised one of his eyebrows when Ryuji’s gaze fell to him and his smile had faded. “You two know each other?”

Hell yeah he knew Ann. They’d known each other for _years_. They hadn’t talked in such a long time though-- not since she’d moved to the states.

Shoving his phone into the pocket of his jacket without a second thought, Ryuji made his way to the counter, slapping a hand on top of the wood as his mouth formed into a wide grin. “Y-yeah!” He said, looking over Ann’s face. Wow, she sure had matured over the years. She was absolutely _stunning_. But Ryuji would know those eyes anywhere. “It’s been years!”

Ann was smiling now as well, and she turned on her stool to face the blonde male. “Yeah.” She seemed to be a lot calmer than Ryuji was. Maybe she wasn’t as excited to see him as he been her. But it wasn’t often you come into contact with a friend you haven’t seen in years, right?

If they could really be considered friends at this point. It had been quite a bit of time since the last time Ryuji had seen the female. It had been maybe… Thirteen years since the last time Ryuji could recall having seen Ann. As for speaking (or rather _messaging_ ), it hadn’t been as long, but it’d still be pushing at least a decade by now. 

A glance over Ann’s shoulder had Ryuji making eye contact with Ren. His eyebrows were raised and there was a small frown on his face as he looked back at Ryuji.

Poor, confused Ren.

Their conversation moved them to one of the booths soon after. Ann sat on one side while Ryuji was on the other, his arms on top of the table as he tapped his fingers against the wood.

Ann was cradling her cup of coffee in her hands, and Ryuji did the same with his mug of hot chocolate once Ren brought it to him.

“Man, it’s been forever.” Ryuji muttered with a smile, stirring his drink as he always did before taking a small sip. “How’ve ya been?”

Ann was still smiling, and she was looking at the blonde with warm eyes. Maybe she _did_ miss him too. It was so strange to come into contact with her again after so many years, and completely out of the blue. 

“I’ve been well. Really well, actually.” 

That was good to hear. 

“That’s great!” At least they were getting to sit and talk, right? He had honestly missed her voice.

“Mhmm. I’d like to hear about how you’re doing too!” Laughing a little bit, Ann leaned forward in her seat. Perhaps she was more excited to see Ryuji than he initially thought. “Tell me about how you came here.”

It wasn’t an exciting story, really. “Just wanted to get a fresh start.” Telling her _anything_ would be good, right? But it wasn’t like he had many plans as soon as he got to New York. Maybe he was trying to prove something to someone else-- _everyone_ else. He was mature. He could make it along just as well as everyone else! Even if it’s in a brand new country! Or maybe he was just trying to prove something to _himself_. 

Ren, who had sat down on one of the barstools after he served Ryuji, was tilting back dangerously on the stool, his arms crossed. But there was an amused look on his face. It looked like he was enjoying the conversation, despite not really being part of it. 

“How do you both know each other?” He asked, looking between the two of them. 

Ann was the first one to speak. “When I lived in Japan, Ryuji and I went to middle school together. He and I lost contact in high school, before we started talking.” She explained, holding one hand palm-up towards Ren.

“What a shame.” Ren said with a chuckle. Huh? What did he mean by that? “Then he could have met _me_ sooner.” Oh. What an ass.

Regardless, Ann let out a small laugh at that. “I’m sure you’ve given him more trouble than you’re worth already.” And then she looked to Ryuji, eyes shining with the laughter that she wouldn’t let pass her lips. “Run while you can.”

It was Ryuji’s turn to laugh at that. “I did.”

And Ren ended up showing up at his house when he did.

Ann’s smile widened as she leaned forward on the table, resting her chin in her hand. But at that moment, something caught Ryuji’s eyes. On her hand something was sparkling. It was bright and caught the light as she moved, and Ryuji swore that it was a-

“A ring?” He asked, suddenly reaching out and grabbing Ann’s hand. He pulled it forward and looked it over. Sure enough there were two bright gold rings on her left ring finger. Clear diamonds were locked in each of them, and Ryuji looked up to her face again. “You’re _married_?”

Ann was flushing a bright pink now and she looked away. But she was smiling-- almost a little shyly. 

“Yeah.” She said, pulling her hand back. She nervously tapped her fingers atop the table, biting her lip for a moment after. And then her gaze met Ryuji’s once again. “Do you remember Shiho?”

Shiho? _Shiho_? Where did Ryuji recall that name from? Thinking for a little bit, he tapped a finger against his chin before coming up with an answer.

“You mean _Suzui_?” Ann’s friend from middle school? 

She nodded. “We got married about a year ago.”

Wow. Ryuji hadn’t seen that coming. He knew that about the time Ann had to leave that she had been questioning her sexuality. Hell, she had even confided in Ryuji about it a few times. But it wasn’t the fact that she was married to a woman that surprised him. It was more _who it was_ that had him stumped. Well. Good luck to them then. He wasn’t opposed, so long as Ann was being treated properly.

He was smiling again, and he was about to speak when Ren slid into the booth beside Ann, wrapping his arms around her and pressing the side of his face against hers.

“It’s tragic. She turned down _my_ proposal.”

_What_?

Ryuji was stunned. Sitting there with his hands pressed to the table and mouth hanging slightly open. Ren and Ann used to be _dating_? And it as serious enough for Ren to want to _propose_?

Shoving him away, though it looked pretty gentle in Ryuji’s opinion, Ann shook her head. “Like i would have ever accepted a proposal from _you_!” She didn’t seem mad though.

But it was the truth. Apparently. Ryuji couldn’t help but be floored by the words he’d just heard. What was even going on? New York City was way too weird.

Ren leaned against the backrest of the booth, his arm draped over the top of it behind Ann. “It’s all right though. I’ve found someone else I’m interested in now.”

He was making almost painful eye contact with Ryuji, and he could feel himself flinching back a little bit.

Huh? Ren was weird. Too weird. But was he trying to get a jealous reaction out of Ryuji again? Well, he certainly _wouldn’t_ get that.

Looking back to Ann, Ryuji smiled at her. “Congratulations. Tell Suzui I said ‘hi’.”

Ann nodded as she looked to Ryuji, smile softening again. “I will. Thank you.” And then she perked up, turning to her purse on the seat beside her. She pulled out her phone after, holding it up. “Give me your number! We can talk!

Oh! Good idea. Grabbing his own phone out of his pocket, Ryuji was suddenly reminded that he’d never responded to Hifumi from earlier. Shit. Poor Hifumi. But he’d have to respond to her in a few moments-- after he and Ann had each other in their phones.

And just as he saved Ann’s contact information into his phone, the bell above the door rang to signify that someone had entered the cafe. 

“Welcome.” He heard Boss say from his perpetual spot behind the counter today.

Ren seemed excited when he looked to the door though, smiling wide as he stood from the booth. To the new person, he motioned to the spot beside Ann, and then he made his way back to the counter.

Into the seat slipped a girl with (very) curly reddish-brown hair. She had large eyes, and as soon as she sat down she slipped her heavy jacket from her shoulders, folding it over in her lap. 

“Thank you!” She said as she smiled to Ren, who had slipped behind the counter by that point. Her voice was so tiny that Ryuji swore she sounded like a mouse, but she seemed excited nonetheless. And then her gaze fell onto Ryuji, smile widening. “Hello!”

“Hey!” Ryuji said, giving her a small wave. She was pretty cute. Adorable, really. She was so tiny too. 

“Ryuji, this is Haru. She’s a friend of ours.” Ann said as she motioned to the girl beside her.

The girl, in return, waved. “It’s a pleasure to meet you!”

“Yeah! Likewise.”

Then, she turned to Ann. “I’m sorry I’m late. Father had me stay to meet one of his subordinates.” Oh, so they were planning on meeting here. Ann didn’t seem to mind though. She was smiling.

“It’s all right!” She said just as Ren placed a cup of coffee in front of Haru. “Drink your coffee and then we can go out after!” 

Perhaps they were going to hang out afterwards. The conversation seemed to happy to be related to work or anything, so it was probably something having to do with friends. 

And then Ryuji felt the seat on his side shift, and he glanced to the side to see Ren sitting beside him. Ryuji didn’t think he’d left that much room on the bench beside himself, but apparently it was enough for Ren to squeeze in. And they were only barely brushing against each other. 

Even so, Ryuji did shift to the side slightly so Ren could get more comfortable, leaning forward and crossing his arms on the table.

Ann and Haru seemed to be talking amongst themselves and laughing with each other now. They sure were close, huh?

But as he was admiring them, he heard Ren speak up. “Hungry, Ryuji?”

The blonde turned, looking back to his neighbor with interest, smiling wide. “Am I ever!”

He really did love Leblanc.

It looked like Hifumi would have to wait a _little_ bit longer for her response to come.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since Ann and Shiho’s relationship is more mentioned in a passing for now, I don’t plan on tagging it.
> 
> I hope you have a good day!


	8. Tastes

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So some real life stuff distracted me for a little bit and I took a few days off from writing, but here's this chapter! The storie's finally really starting to begin! Enjoy!

Oh, it was cold. It was _so_ cold. Winter was definitely upon them. And Ryuji was _not_ happy about it.

There was cold and there was wind. If it were only one or the other, it wouldn’t be so bad. But at least he wasn’t alone. Ren was beside him as he accompanied Ryuji to the grocery store. It’d been a while since his last trip there, and he was running low on food.

Ren seemed tired though, as noted by his frequent yawning. Well, it _was_ pretty late. For someone who worked early in the mornings. Ryuji really should have considered the hour he was asking Ren to come out and shop with him.

But he could have said no! If he was tired, Ren was more than okay to stay home! Ryuji was a big boy. He could go shopping for himself. 

Then again, Ren might have needed food too.

Shivering under the weight of the jacket around himself, Ryuji kept his gaze ahead. They weren’t going to that special market by their home with the special grapes that the blonde loved oh-so much-- they were just going to a generic store. He needed more than just some big grapes. He needed food that would actually satisfy his hunger. 

Somewhere in the corner of his eye, Ryuji could see Ren, who didn’t seem as affected by the cold, pull his small pack of cigarettes from his pocket before looking to Ryuji. “D’you mind?” He asked, waving the pack in the air a little bit.

Wow. Ryuji hadn’t actually _seen_ him smoke in a while. He sure did _smell_ it on a regular basis though.

But, while walking, it would be all right, right? The smell wouldn’t be as potent, and he was sure that Ren wouldn’t blow the smoke in his direction. He wasn’t that sort of rude, right?

Ryuji did nod, despite the fact that he didn’t really _want_ to smell that shit. If Ren was willing to compromise for him, then Ryuji could afford to do the same for him too, right?

“Sure.” He muttered, and he spotted Ren shooting him a sympathetic smile. He knew how much Ryuji hated the stuff. But compromises. Very rarely did he do it in front of the blonde.

Pulling a lighter from his pocket, Ren lit up the cigarette and took a drag from it, blowing it, thankfully, in the opposite direction of Ryuji. 

Immediately the smell hit the blonde’s nose. He crinkled it, but just opted to hide under the collar of his jacket again for now. 

Looking ahead of themselves, the grocery store wasn’t that much farther. Maybe another couple of blocks. Ryuji had made a list of things that he would need though. And quite the list it was. He was planning on making some boxed macaroni this week. Junk food always tastes good, right? He did wish that he could have more properly homemade foods. But he just felt like he didn’t have the time to hand make everything. How his mother could afford a full time job and also to cook everything from scratch every night, Ryuji didn’t know. Hopefully things were easier for her when she didn’t have to worry about her son though.

And before he was aware, they were standing outside of the sliding glass doors. He waited (as) patiently (as possible) for Ren to stub out his cigarette on the bottom of his shoe before it was tossed into a garbage can. And then they head inside, and Ryuji grabbed a basket for his items. Ren didn’t grab his own though, and Ryuji silently felt a little bad for making him come all this way if he wasn’t going to be buying anything. 

But, again, the black haired male could have turned the offer down. Ryuji was glad that he didn’t though. Ren was his friend, and he honestly enjoyed the time they spent together. Even when he was dragging his dear neighbor out to the supermarket at almost nine o’clock at night.

They started out in the fresh produce section. Ryuji only had to worry about feeding himself, so he wasn’t sure if he would buy anything from there. Frozen vegetables were just as good for you, right? And they lasted a hell of a lot longer. Still, Ryuji stopped by the fruit section to grab himself a few apples. They were a good snack, and sometimes he just wasn’t motivated to make anything.

It didn’t take them long to head deeper into the store. Ren was following Ryuji around much like a little puppy on it’s master’s heels, occasionally picking up and item or two to look it over. It was obvious that he was tired. He wasn’t feeling very talkative-- even when Ryuji attempted to crack a joke or two. He wasn’t being rude about it or anything, but the more quiet his friend was, the worse Ryuji felt for dragging him out to the store. 

The meat section was surprisingly void of any other customers, so they seemed to have a free run of the small aisle. Leaning over one of the display cases, Ryuji began sorting through his options for sausage. It wasn’t cheap living in the city, but if he was going to pay for overpriced meat, then he would look for the best ones he could find before he would shell out any cash.

For a moment though, Ryuji wondered just what kind of food Ren liked. He’d mentioned multiple times in their short friendship that he didn’t cook, but Ryuji wasn’t sure if it was due to a lack of talent or if he just didn’t enjoy it. Ryuji didn’t enjoy it himself all of the time, but he could at least cook some things. 

He didn’t mind helping out his mother when she was busy. He would cook a twelve course meal for her if it made her happy. And he’d do it every night. But she usually did most of the cooking at home. Ryuji had many fond memories of the cute bento boxes he was sent to school with when he was younger.

Then again, when she was a housewife, she did have more free time to make them for him. But as busy as she became after Ryuji’s father ditched them, he was much happier. No longer did he have to protect his mother from the constant abuse that she suffered. No longer did he have to make up excuses for the bruises that would cover his arms and chest. But that was another story.

Cooking for himself, Ryuji could afford to be a little lazy. Who cared if everything he was making didn’t look presentable? If something was a little burned, he didn’t mind. He was only going to hurt himself in the end, and he had to say that he really was pretty decent with his culinary skills.

But in regards to Ren, Ryuji frowned. If he didn’t like to cook or if he didn’t know how to cook, then what did he eat when he was at home? Obviously he could get some curry while he was out. He could order out every night, but that was expensive. Maybe microwave meals and instant ramen?

But as good as instant ramen was, Ren wouldn’t be healthy living off of it. He could do with eating a few fruits and vegetables. Not to mention some real meat. Ren was as thin as a stick.

He must have been looking at the sausage for a while though, because the next thing he knew, Ren was commenting about it.

“Fantasizing about something for later?” Ryuji glanced up to see him leaning with his hip on the display case, arms crossed over his chest and that stupid grin plastered on his dumb face.

Dude. Gross.

But Ryuji blushed, his cheeks turning pink as he picked up the packet closest to himself, stuffing it into his basket with the apples.

“ _No_.” He insisted, then putting his hand on his hip as he stood upright, almost glaring at his friend.

“Well, you were looking at that sausage a little _intently_.” What an asshole.

But then a small smile weaved onto Ryuji’s own lips. Ren was feeling pretty confident about himself, huh? All of his assumptions.

“You act like I’m gay.” Ryuji said. Right. Deny it. Playing along with Ren was a good way to get on the track to teasing him back. He did a hell of a lot of teasing to other people. He deserved to get a little shit as well.

“I guess I just assumed.” He was still smirking. Even when he was falling asleep standing up, Ren was still playful, huh? Poor thing. His eyes were half closed and everything. But at least he was talking now. Things didn’t seem so awkward anymore.

Still, did Ryuji _look_ gay? He wasn’t gay. Nope. He never claimed to be. He may have been part of the way there, but he wasn’t just _gay_. He liked girls too. Boys and girls. 

Shaking his head, Ryuji moved away from the display case and more into the store. It was about time to start looking for dried goods, huh? He did wish that they had more things that the blonde would be into though. He was still mostly used to the foods from Japan, and seeing so many American things on the shelf was a bit overwhelming. Where was the kombu? The red bean buns? _The pocky?_

Okay, so pocky was easy to find. But Ryuji really didn’t eat a lot of it, so in all honesty he really didn’t care if he didn’t see it so often.

But you couldn’t take Ryuji away from his senbei. Quite often his mother sent him some through the mail. Just so he wouldn’t feel so homesick, right?

Or at least that’s what she said in her letters.

Ryuji missed his mother.

Heading down one of the aisles, Ryuji took a look at the stock they had lined up on the shelves. Macaroni, right? He’d planned on buying some. He selected a few boxes of the brand that he usually bought, tossing them into his basket with a sigh. It just wasn’t the same in America, huh?

“We’d probably get better results from an Asian market.” It was like Ren was reading his mind. Standing beside Ryuji, his hands were in his pockets as he looked at the boxes on the shelf. He was right though. If they’d gone to a store with foods that were familiar to them, then they’d both be more in their element. They’d likely find things they recognized, and they’d be able to purchase ingredients that one wouldn’t find in your typical American store.

He saw Ren glance over to him from the corner of his eye, and Ryuji met his gaze. The taller male was smiling down at Ryuji. “Next time I’ll take you someplace more fun.” Or more familiar. But maybe he meant the place on the way to Leblanc? The place that Ryuji suspected had kyoho. 

The idea of getting to eat some almost made his mouth water.

Almost.

He did smile in return though. “Yeah! I’m sure they’d have better fruit and stuff. And you can’t beat the snacks.” Of course he was hinting at a few things. Ryuji really regretted not having explored the city more before he met Ren. It would have been nice to know that he was so close to places like Leblanc. But he’d just never found the motivation to explore.

He was rewarded with a brighter smile, Ren then wandering farther down the aisle afterwards. Maybe Ryuji could see if the other male stopped to look at anything in particular. After his initial thoughts about what Ren might like, he really was curious.

Was he more interested in sweets? Savories? Sour foods? 

And thinking about that, maybe one day Ryuji could cook something for him. _Not like a date_ , but more like inviting his friend over to show him that he could eat _something_. Ryuji really suspected that he didn’t eat anything of substance. His mother would tell him something akin to putting meat on his bones.

He did follow Ren down the aisle though and into the next, pausing at the end of it while the other male made his way down the makeshift hall. Was he looking for something? Or just trying to stay awake?

Looking through various other items on the shelf, but not really paying attention, Ryuji was careful to keep an eye on his friend. He wanted to look for something, anything that might give him a clue to the tastes of his friend.

And then, seemingly out of nowhere, Ren stopped. He looked at the shelf, gaze focused on something near the bottom shelves. Oh? Did he find something he liked?

Ren paused as he looked at the things on the shelf, taking his time in deciding before he kneeled down. So he _did_ find something. At least something that interested him enough to stop and maybe select a thing or two to purchase.

And then he reached out, pulling a small brown bag from the shelf. It was folded over at the top, and Ren held it in his lap as he looked over what Ryuji assumed was the back label. But what was it?

Squinting so he could get a better look (even though they weren’t really that far. Maybe a yard or two away from each other), it suddenly hit him. _Coffee_.

Of _course_ it was coffee. Did Ren like anything else? He always had a mug of it around wherever he went. Even when he was just visiting Ryuji at his apartment.

Well, at least Ryuji could be certain about one of Ren’s tastes.. He liked bitter things. 

But it was only then that Ryuji noticed that he was standing in front of a small section of tea. He really didn’t drink any, so he never kept any at his place. Citron tea was good though, but he was sure he’d never find the kind he liked in a grocery store like this.

Sighing, Ryuji just turned to head closer to Ren, looking down at him as he still looked over the label of the coffee in his lap.

“Hey.” He said with a small smile. He couldn’t really be mad at Ren for not letting him know about his tastes. Ryuji was trying to find out in secrecy, and if he liked coffee then that was his business. Seriously. The guy probably had the stuff running through his blood. There could be worse addictions, right? “Find something you like?”

Ren was smiling when he looked up to Ryuji, pushing his impossibly huge glasses up higher on the bridge of his nose. “Yeah.” And he was upright in an instant. Ryuji gladly took the bag from his neighbor and tossed it into the basket. It’d be a gift. Something to make up for the time he wasted while Ren could have been sleeping.

There was no protest though, and Ryuji was thankful for that. He didn’t want to have to explain his intentions. It was embarrassing.

The rest of the trip through the store was quick. Some snacks from the chip aisle and something to drink and then they found themselves at the registers. Paying didn’t take long either, and then they were on the streets again with their bags and Ryuji was regretting the decision to ever leave his apartment once more.

Seriously. The winter sucked. And it was really beating him down.

Ren seemed to be in good spirits though, cradling his bag in the crook of his arm like one would a child, his other hand finding warmth in the pocket of his jeans. He really did love coffee. It was actually kind of cute. In a _friend_ way.

Ryuji carried the two of his bags in one hand, tugging his phone out of his pocket after he felt it vibrate. Ann had been texting him like crazy since he’d given her his number. It wasn’t a _bad_ thing-- in fact, it was _great_! But she did seem to have a lot of time on her hands. Maybe she didn’t have any hobbies, but she sure did text at all hours of the day. Her job must have been flexible.

It sure was a good thing that the apartments weren’t too far from the shop though. Even just after he’d only responded to Ann’s text, Ryuji’s hand was cold. The poor one holding onto the groceries would be throbbing by the time they got home. He did tug the sleeve of his jacket down a little though. At least that would shield it from the cold a little bit. And it worked. Thankfully. It just didn’t work amazingly.

He pulled the top of his jacket up a little bit though to hide his nose from the cold. Why did your nose always burn once it hit cold weather? It really was a huge inconvenience. Damn Ren for not seeming to be affected by cold weather though. It must have been far below freezing, and he was acting like he was just fine.

Looking over to his friend, Ryuji watched as Ren kept his gaze ahead of them. His movements were a bit sluggish, but even so he seemed so… _Cool_.

Everything about Ren seemed cool. He was sassy, sly, mysterious, charming… He was very handsome and he had a lot of friends. He’d proven on multiple occasions that he was intelligent. And he was happy. Carefree. And a tad bit childish. He seemed to be everything that Ryuji desperately _wanted_ to be, and the blonde couldn’t help but feel…

_Jealous_.

But not in resentful way. He didn’t _want_ to be jealous of Ren, and he had no hatred for his neighbor. He just… Wished that he could be more like him. Ren seemed to be so interesting as a person. People seemed to really care about him, and everyone was always smiling when they spotted him. Ren was _perfect_.

And Ryuji wanted to be perfect in some way as well. 

But he did feel bad for being jealous of Ren. Ryuji was sure he could be just as cool if he tried hard enough. He could learn to be slick and mischievous as well. Hell, maybe he could observe Ren a bit. He could learn from him, right?

At least that was the mindset that Ryuji wanted to keep himself on. He really didn’t want to hold any resentment towards his friend. Not because he didn’t want to be alone again, but because he genuinely did like Ren. He was a great guy, and Ryuji could see why so many people seemed to care about him so deeply.

He saw Ren motion to something on the ground vaguely, and he saw him open his mouth to speak, but Ryuji was far too distracted to process that he’d really said anything-- let alone be paying attention enough to know what was actually being said.

And that was when it happened. Out of seemingly nowhere, Ryuji had a slip of his memory.

Before he knew it, his mind was blank and he found himself on the ground on his side, palms burning and pressed to the ground in front of himself.

He was sitting on one leg, and he blinked in confusion for a moment.

His hands hurt. They felt like they’d been scraped on the sidewalk, but they were impossibly cold at the same time. Still, his hands weren’t what hurt the most.

It was the pain rocketing through his leg that had him concerned.


	9. A New Plan

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was one of the first ideas I'd ever had for this story. I planned it for a long while!
> 
> Enjoy!

Getting home had been difficult, but thankfully Ren had been there to help.

He’d carried all of their bags, as well as helped Ryuji limp back to the apartment. They couldn’t just stay out on the sidewalk for forever. It was far too cold for that. And not to mention the sidewalks weren’t exactly the most _comfortable_ place to stay. Or the most sanitary.

But Ryuji didn’t expect to find himself in Ren’s apartment, sitting on his bed. The grocery bags were sitting on the ground behind Ren, and Morgana was definitely begging for attention as he sat in Ryuji’s lap. Ryuji had tried to shoo him away, but it seemed the cat felt neglected. Scratching behind Morgana’s ear, Ryuji hissed as Ren looked over his ankle, twisting it a bit uncomfortably. 

While the pain in his leg had numbed quite a bit, Ryuji couldn’t help but feel the searing pain in his ankle. Part of him was worried that it had been broken, but he’d been able to limp home pretty painfully. Ren had taken on most of his weight though. What a life saver. 

Ryuji looked down at his neighbor as he looked at his ankle, Morgana seeming satisfied with the petting he was receiving all while Ryuji waited not-so-patiently for his diagnosis. Seriously, couldn’t Ren hurry up a little bit? Ryuji felt like he was sweating bullets as he waited.

“It doesn’t look like it’s broken.” Ren muttered, and Ryuji could feel himself breathe a sigh of relief. That was a medical expense that he didn’t want to shell out-- not to mention he wouldn’t be able to afford it either. “It’s bruising though.” And Ryuji could see the swelling on it already. Ugh. Just looking at his ankle was making him cringe.

Looking up at Ren when he stood, Ryuji frowned. “D’you think ice will help?” At least with the pain and the swelling. Ryuji was really hoping he could at least take some sort of pain pill for it, but he wasn’t sure if Ren had something like that here. The average person would though, right?

Nodding, Ren pulled his phone out of his pocket. “Yeah. I’ll get you something for it.” Thankfully Ren was being supportive. It was nice to have someone there to help him out. Especially when it was Ren’s own fault that Ryuji had fallen.

He’d been told that he had slipped on the ice on the sidewalk a few blocks from the apartment. Dammit. He knew he should have been more careful about it. He’d even been worried about slipping recently.

And before Ryuji could say anything else, Ren was off and in the kitchen, presumably getting something for Ryuji to put on his leg. 

Ryuji looked down at his leg though. He had to admit that he’d been nervous about it at first. Back in high school Ryuji had broken the same leg, and when he’d fallen and felt the pain, he had thought that he’d once again broken it. But back then he couldn’t even walk. If your bone was broken, you couldn’t use whatever it was, right? So this couldn’t be that serious of a problem. It just hurt. _A lot_.

Scratching the cat’s ear for a moment, Ryuji heaved a sigh. He sort of just wanted to head back home and rest for a little bit, but he was sure that Ren wouldn’t let him. Not with his ankle in the shape that it was in. 

Then, upon hearing what Ryuji thought was the refrigerator door slam closed, Morgana hopped from his lap and rushed to the kitchen, meowing loudly. Maybe he was hungry. He was always such a loud cat though. What a pain in the ass.

And he followed Ren back into the main part of the home, looking up at him expectantly. He was really looking for a treat, huh?

Ren, meanwhile, had a towel in one hand with a bag full of ice resting atop it while the other hand pressed his phone against his cheek. So he was calling someone. Ryuji stayed quiet as his neighbor kneeled before him, gently placing the cooled items against the bare skin of his ankle while the phone was propped between his cheek and his shoulder. Ouch. Ryuji flinched. 

“Yeah, it’s me.” Ren muttered into the phone. It sounded like the person on the other end had picked up, huh? There was a pause before Ren spoke once again. “I need a favor. A house call.” House call? Was he trying to find someone to come help Ryuji? Frowning, Ryuji leaned back on the bed a little bit. He didn’t want to cause any trouble, really.

Ren then stood, turning away from Ryuji to continue his phone call. “I know. When can you get here?” So they’d agreed? And then Ren was quiet for a bit, audibly sighing as he shoved his free hand into his pocket. He looked, dare Ryuji say it, a bit troubled. “Look, you owe me. You said it yourself.” Huh?

Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji frowned. Someone owed Ren a favor? For what? He certainly didn’t sound happy about bringing it up. That didn’t seem good. Opening his mouth, Ryuji was about to protest when Ren finally spoke again.

“Deal. I’ll see you then.” And then he hung up the call, looking back over to Ryuji with a smile.

Though the smile seemed to be forced. Ryuji could tell.

“A doctor is coming.” He explained, reaching down and picking up his beloved cat. Petting the feline, Ren held him to his chest. “Are you hungry? I’ll get you something.”

Ryuji hated the way Ren was looking at him. His smile felt almost painful to look at, and he couldn’t even force himself to smile as well. Something about Ren’s words earlier had him worried. He’d made a deal with someone, and now he suddenly seemed upset about it.

Ryuji shook his head though. “No. I’m fine.” 

That answer didn’t seem to satisfy Ren though. Putting the cat down, he took the bags from their shopping trip and made his way to the kitchen again. After a bit of rummaging around and the sound of tap water running, Ryuji was soon met face-to-face with an apple. It looked like Ren was going to force him to eat, huh?

But he didn’t return without a treat for Morgana. Leaning over, Ren held out a small brown biscuit for the cat, and it was graciously eaten up.

Taking the apple, Ryuji just huffed. He wished that Ren would have listened to him, but an apple did sound nice. Pain pills sounded nicer though.

Looking back up to his friend once he’d stood again, Ryuji set the apple in his own lap. “Hey. You got Tylenol or something?”

Ren looked confused though. It was like the idea had never occurred to him that Ryuji might want to take something for his pain as well. Damn. This guy could be clueless sometimes, huh?

“Sure. One second.” And he was in the bathroom a moment later. From his spot on the bed, Ryuji could see that Ren had opened the medicine cabinet and was rooting through it. It didn’t take him long to return with a couple of pills in hand, and then a quick trip to the kitchen had a glass of water in Ryuji’s hand as well.

The blonde took the pills graciously.

And then the glass of water was taken from him and placed upon a nearby table before Ren joined him in sitting on the bed. Morgana wasted no time in hopping onto the bed as well, stepping on Ren’s lap with his front paws and leaning into a few gentle pets from his owner.

Taking his apple, Ryuji dared to take a bite from it, looking at the ground him front of himself as he chewed. He really hoped that he hadn’t caused any problems in Ren’s life because of the accident. The sound of making a deal with someone unknown was almost terrifying to him. What was Ren supposed to do for them? He really had sounded concerned on the phone, and he seemed a little more lifeless since he’d gotten off of the phone. Looking down at his hands, Ryuji fiddled with the apple in his lap. 

“You all right?” He suddenly heard from the male beside him. Looking over to Ren, Ryuji could tell that he was worried. Perhaps about Ryuji’s leg, or just how he felt about the situation in general. “If you’re uncomfortable, then I ca-”

“You’re not in any trouble, are you?” Ryuji’s shoulders had fallen the more he looked at Ren. Really, what had he agreed to? If it was something that could get him into serious business, then Ryuji wanted nothing to do with this so called “doctor”.

Ren looked almost taken aback by the question, his eyes wide as he seemingly flinched back for a moment. His hand on the cat paused, and Ryuji swore that his mouth hadn’t been open when he’d first spoken. 

Looking away from him, Ryuji looked to the floor, to his ankle, to the apple in his lap. He felt ashamed. He had been the reason for a bit of stress in his neighbor’s life, and honestly…

He didn’t feel like he was worth the trouble.

“Why would you ask tha-”

“So you _are_ in trouble.” There was no way that answering his question like that meant that Ren was safe from… Whatever he wasn’t safe from. Ryuji wished he’d be honest with him. If he had to do something against his will just because of his stupid ankle, then it wasn’t worth it. 

Ryuji could limp his way to a doctor’s office in the morning to find out if his ankle was going to be all right or not. Granted, Ren _had_ called the doctor on his own. Plus, Ryuji was sure he’d have to drag his neighbor along to the doctor anyway.

“Look,” he began, looking to Ren once more. He sighed before he continued-- feeling the sudden need to release some of the pressure that seemed to be building up in his chest. Ugh. This felt like shit. “Call that doctor back. Tell them I don’t want to see them. If this is going to make you-”

“No!” Ren’s voice was stern. He leaned closer to Ryuji, palm pressing to the mattress between them. His voice almost scared Ryuji, but the sudden urgency did startle him a bit. He felt himself recoil slightly, and Ren’s shoulders slumped as he continued to lean between them. “Let me help you.” 

His voice sounded almost desperate, and for some reason it scared Ryuji more than the initial concern about something that may have been causing Ren issues.

Ren was still leaned in close to Ryuji, but his demeanor had changed. He looked like a small, sad puppy that had just been denied the prospect of a walk. Except it was more serious than that. Ryuji felt a cold shiver run up his spine, and he forced himself to keep looking at his neighbor, though he felt ashamed of himself.

“Ren…”

“ _Please._ ” Ren was really worrying him, but things seemed to have calmed a bit. For now. Ren’s voice was much softer while he pleaded, and he took a deep breath. It was like he’d been holding a breath the whole time. “I’m not in trouble. I promise.”

Ryuji wanted to trust him. He wanted to believe that Ren was all right, but from all of the clues that he’d been given since they met… Something was weird about Ren. That was for sure. 

He could feel Ren’s shoulder barely brushing against his own as Ryuji looked over Ren’s entire face for any sign that maybe he actually wasn’t all right. But his heart was telling him that he should trust Ren. Despite the heavy feeling in his gut, Ryuji tried to calm himself, taking a deep breath.

He opened his mouth to speak, but the sudden knocking at the door had him jump in his spot on the bed, his apple falling to the ground and rolling a few feet away before bouncing off of the wall opposite himself.

Ren pulled away and stood, heading to the door with Morgana right on his heel, and the door was promptly answered.

Whoever it was, they were much shorter than Ren. It was obvious. He could barely see the top of the other person’s head over Ren’s shoulder. Whomever it was, they had dark navy colored hair. 

Shifting on the bed a little bit, Ryuji just gave himself a half hug while he waited for the two to join him.

It didn’t take long, and then Ryuji noticed that the “doctor” was a female. She was short-- _very_ short. If her platformed shoes were anything to go by, as well as the fact that she barely stood a chance against Ren’s stature. 

She wore a teal dress and a leather jacket, and the leggings that she wore beneath the dress were torn up. She certainly didn’t look like any doctor Ryuji knew. In fact, if he’d spotted her dressed like that on the street, he would have assumed that she was part of a band or something. She looked pretty hardcore, to say the least.

She looked Ryuji up and down before turning to look at Ren, pointing to Ryuji with one of her fingers. “You certainly look well enough. I assume _he_ is my patient.”

Ren just nodded at the female after that, and then he looked at Ryuji.

“This is Tae. She’s a… Friend.”

Ryuji didn’t like that pause.

Still, he looked from Ren to the doctor and nodded, forcing a smile onto his lips. “Hey. I’m Ryuji.”

But suddenly the woman smiled. It was a small one, but it felt strangely warm for the first impression that Ryuji had gotten of the woman. “I’m pleased. Let’s take a look at your…” Looking over Ryuji, her gaze paused at his ankle for a moment before she looked to his face once more. “Ankle. Shall we?”

She placed the bag she’d brought onto the floor beside herself as she kneeled down, removing the ice from Ryuji’s leg.

Ren had been right earlier. It really had started to bruise up really quickly.

The doctor clicked her tongue as she looked over Ryuji’s injury. Cringing a little bit at the pain, she didn’t seem to be any more gentle than Ren had been earlier. In fact, she was more rough. And Ryuji let out a small yelp of pain before he could stop himself.

The doctor’s gaze shot up to his face and there was a smirk spreading across her lips. Oh great. Was she a fan of teasing as well?

It doesn’t hurt _that_ much.” Oh, she was not gentle at all, now was she? Rude.

Regardless, she was to her feet in a moment again. Looking over at Ren, she crossed her arms over her chest softly, though she held one hand out as she spoke.

“It’s just a sprain. He’ll have to stay off of it for at least a few days.”

Why was she talking to Ren like he was Ryuji’s mother? He was _right there_. She could just talk to Ryuji.

Then, looking back to Ryuji, she was frowning again. “It’ll take some time, but it’ll heal on its own. You should rest.” Well, at least it wasn’t _too_ serious, right? Despite the amount of pain that it was causing. “I’ll write a note for you to give to your boss when you return.”

Oh. So he was going to have to miss work…

Well, he really couldn’t stand on his bad leg, so he had no option but to sit out for a few days, it seemed.

Tugging a pad of paper from her bag, Tae began scribbling on it with a pen that had been bound to it with some elastic. Then, she ripped the paper off of the pad, holding it out to Ren.

“Have that filled tomorrow morning, and follow the directions on the bottle.” Oh, so it was a prescription. Probably for some sort of pain medicine. Maybe it would be a little bit stronger than whatever Ren had given him earlier.

Ren, in return, just nodded.

And then Tae was smiling again, resting one hand on her hip as the other waved the pad of paper towards Ren. “And do remember our little deal. You’ve been awfully disobedient lately.” Reaching out, she tapped Ren atop the head with the pad of paper.

Ren just let out a small grunt, but there was a tiny smile on his own lips.

Well, maybe Ryuji didn’t really have anything to worry about. She was playing around with Ren, and Ren didn’t seem like he was nervous or anything. Maybe Ryuji had just been too nervous about the situation earlier. 

He felt himself smile a little bit at the scene before him, even though he really did wonder what Tae had meant. She treated his neighbor like some sort of pet.

And then she looked back to Ryuji, tossing her notepad into her bag and then closing it and picking it up once again. “Well, if that’s it, I’d like to go home. It’s far past closing time.” And with that she was frowning, sending Ren a half-hearted glare.

Ren only gave a small laugh, biting his lip for a second. “Sorry.”

“You shouldn’t lie. It’s not attractive.” But despite her words she was smiling again. Glancing to Ryuji after that, her gaze softened a bit. “Feel better. Stop by the clinic if you need anything else.”

Ren followed her to the door, and she was shown out without another word. Upon returning to main area of the apartment, Ren placed the paper he’d been given down on the same table that held Ryuji’s drink from earlier.

Ryuji was quiet for a little bit, but something was bothering him. Shouldn’t he… Be getting back home? But he’d definitely need to get some help getting back down there…

But maybe it was best to start a little open-mindedly.

“So… Now what?” He asked, looking up at his neighbor.

Ren seemed to think for just a second, then moving to the closet in the doorway. He slid open one of the doors and then began rummaging through it. “Well, you can’t just go home. There’s no one to help you there.”

So where was he supposed to stay?

Pulling a folded blanket from inside the closet, Ren shifted it to one hand as he continued to look through the closet. 

“I’ll set you up on the couch.”

What?

Ryuji frowned, though his eyebrows furrowed a little bit. “Huh? What do you mean?”

Ren, looking back to Ryuji, was frowning again. “You can’t get around well on your own. I’ll help you.” 

Oh no. No, no, no, no, no.

There was no way that he was going to make Ren do something like that. Not without a huge protest.

But something in the look on Ren’s face made Ryuji… Not want to force Ren to not help him. He remembered just how desperate Ren had sounded earlier upon practically begging for Ryuji to let him help him.

And then Ren was looking in the closet again, pulling out a much thinner blanket-- a sheet. “It’s only for a few days. I don’t mind.”

Well… If he insisted.

Ryuji was eventually settled on the couch, both blankets draped over his lap as he was propped up gently by a few pillows from his own place. Ren had been kind enough to fetch a few of Ryuji’s things from his home for him from some pajamas to his laptop to keep him occupied for the long night ahead of himself.

On the coffee table rested a fresh glass of water along with the bottle of pain medicine he’d tried from earlier. Ren was being awfully kind to him, but… It really wasn’t anything out of the ordinary. 

But as he sat there, looking over the few items from his home, Ryuji sighed. Maybe it was best he tried to fall asleep early, huh? That way he could focus less on the pain in his leg that remained, albeit a little numbed, despite the taking of the pills earlier.

Shifting downwards on the couch, Ryuji made himself comfortable, letting out a small grunt as he felt Morgana hop up and onto his lap. Seriously. Did that cat always have to be touching someone? It was nice though. Even if Ryuji was more of a dog kind of guy himself.

Chuckling, Ren just wandered over to the couch and pulled the blankets up for Ryuji, tucking him in like a small child. He was a grown man, dammit. He could take care of himself.

But it did feel sort of nice to be pampered like that.

“Looks like you’ll have someone to cuddle.” He said as he looked down at the cat. “My bed’ll be cold tonight, it seems.”

Oh, cry him a river. Ryuji may think Morgana was weird, but he was going to cuddle the hell out of that cat all night long. 

But Ren didn’t press further. Instead, he made his way over to his own bed, and the sound of sheets being moved caught Ryuji’s ears. He was probably tucking himself into bed then. 

“Call my name if you need me.”

Ryuji peeked over the back of the couch to look at Ren as he slipped under the blankets, then flashing the blonde a smile as he reached out to turn his light off.

“Okay! Sleep well!” Ryuji said. The room was dark, so he laid down on the couch once again, closing his eyes. He was going to try and get a lot of rest. He needed it. His body felt so exhausted.

But his mind really was awake.

Ren must have been really tired though. Because after a few short minutes (or what Ryuji would assume was the case) a soft sound was coming from the other male. The sounds began to grow in volume before Ryuji could really process what they were, and soon the Blonde’s eyes opened.

He stared at the black ceiling above him, wondering how he’d gotten himself into a mess like this.

Ren _snores_. Of _course_ he snores. 

Frowning, Ryuji sighed. It was going to be a long night.

But despite that, a thought prodded at the back of his mind. Laying his arm over his eyes after he closed them, Ryuji thought for a moment. As much as it hurt, maybe this was a good way to learn more about his neighbor.

He’d almost forgotten that he was hiding something.


	10. A Fussy Cat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

It was the early afternoon when Ryuji finally woke up. Sleeping had been pretty difficult with Ren’s snoring, but Ryuji had finally managed to pass out after laying in the dark for a while.

Flipping through various websites through his phone, Ryuji decided to do a little bit of reading while he laid awake after that, free hand dangling from the side of the couch and fingertips barely brushing against the floor.

After waking up, he’d made sure to call his work to let them know about his situation, and he’d read the short note that had been left for him atop the coffee table by Ren.

_Ryuji, I had to go to work this morning. Help yourself to the food in the refrigerator and call me if you need anything. Rest well and don’t let Morgana bother you too much! -Ren_

It was a short note, but it got its point across. Poor Ren had to go to work on such little sleep though, and Ryuji must have completely slept through his neighbor’s morning routine. He was surprised. But then again, maybe he was more tired than he had thought.

Ren’s snoring had made it tough to sleep, after all.

But now Ryuji was laying on the couch with nothing to do and in a home that wasn’t his own. At least he was comfortable, aside from the pain in his ankle. He did contemplate turning on the television though, but ultimately he decided that whatever it was on his phone was met with less effort, and thus it was the better choice. 

But he’d been laying on the couch like that for a little while now. Maybe it was time to sit up and get himself something to eat. Ren had insisted that it was all right, and Ryuji could afford to grab one of his apples or something. Maybe when Ren got home they could order takeout or something. He should be home in…

Looking at the time proved that Ren would be home within the next hour or so. But would Ryuji be able to head to the kitchen without a little bit of help? Eh, he could crawl. Probably. 

But sudden movement caught his attention. Morgana walked up to the side of the couch, wide eyes looking at Ryuji. Smiling, Ryuji reached out an pet the cat on top of the head gently.

“Hey, little guy.”

Morgana was cute, yeah. A little feisty sometimes, but cute.

Letting his arm drop to the ground again, Ryuji went back to looking through his phone. The bottom of it was pressed against his stomach and he held the top, using his thumb to scroll through the page he was on. It didn’t seem like anything interesting was going on at the moment.

_Boring_.

And then a sudden loud meow caught his attention. Looking over to Morgana, he saw that he was still being stared at. Oh. Did the cat want to cuddle again? He’d been a nice warm addition to Ryuji’s blanket last night. Picking up his phone and holding it out of the way, Ryuji pat his stomach.

“Come on.” He couldn’t help but notice that he did use a little bit of baby talk when he spoke to Morgana. Was that mandatory when you were talking to a cat? It seemed like it. Ryuji made the mental note to not talk so high-pitched the next time he had a conversation with a cat.

But Morgana didn’t budge.

Ryuji tried once more, patting his stomach and moving his arm out of the way after. But still, Morgana stayed in place, looking up at him with his wide eyes.

Oh well. Maybe he was just trying for a little bit of attention. Petting the cat’s shoulder after that, and forcing the cat to stumble just the slightest under the pressure (oops), Ryuji then went back to looking at his phone. 

This time he held it with two hands, resting it close to his face. All was peaceful for a few moments until he heard the familiar meowing again.

Looking over to the cat once again, Ryuji frowned. 

“What’s wrong, buddy?”

But still, Morgana didn’t seem like he wanted to move. Ryuji really didn’t know much about the cat, so he really couldn’t judge what he may have wanted just by being looked and meowed at. But if he wasn’t going to move, or give any hint to what he may be hoping for, Ryuji really couldn’t help him.

Shrugging, Ryuji went back to his phone. Morgana didn’t want to cuddle, and really that was all Ryuji could offer him at the moment. Did he just want attention? But he wasn’t moving closer. What a weird cat.

And then yet _another_ meow caught his attention.

Looking to Morgana with a glare, Ryuji frowned. He was tired of hearing him meow like that. 

So much for not letting Morgana bother him too much.

“ _What_?”

And he was met with more staring. No wonder Ryuji was more of a dog person than a cat one.

But a thought did occur to him. Maybe the cat was hungry. Did Ren forget to feed him before he left for work in the morning? Poor thing was probably starving. But could Ryuji really make his way to the kitchen on his ankle? Despite taking some medicine when he first woke up, he was still in quite a bit of pain.

He glanced over the back of the couch to the kitchen and then back to Morgana, who seemed to wag his tail in anticipation. What a cat.

Sighing, Ryuji swung his feet from the couch and to the floor, causing Morgana to flinch back and trot away a few feet. 

“You’re lucky I have to use the bathroom.” He muttered. He pressed his hands to the couch cushions beside himself and hefted himself to his foot-- his _good_ foot. It took a little bit of effort since he was more used to standing using both feet, but it wasn’t so bad. Not now.

But the real test would be to put a bit of pressure on his bad leg. Taking a deep breath, Ryuji put his foot on the ground and tried to take a test step with the aid of the side of the couch.

And nope. That was _not_ a good idea.

He hissed in pain, instantly removing his foot from the ground. Okay. That was the _worst_ idea. But how else was he supposed to get around? Hopping didn’t seem like an option. He’d have to worry about the downstairs neighbors. Not to mention it was bound to make Ryuji _really_ tired _really_ quickly. He thought for a few moments. 

Huh. Maybe crawling was a better option.

Getting to his hands and knees, Ryuji smiled to himself. He was pretty pleased with this new idea. He’d be able to move easily and it wouldn’t hurt his ankle. This was an accomplishment! Sure, it was a little weird to be crawling to the bathroom, but it could have been worse. At most, his knees might become a little sore after various trips around the apartment.

Getting to his feet again after he’d made his way to the toilet was a bit difficult in the small amount of space that was provided in the bathroom, but the trip was… _Relatively_ quick. And then it was time to feed the cat. But did he know what Morgana even ate? Or how much?

Well, he’d figure that out when he got to the kitchen, he supposed.

The trip to the kitchen was quick due to the small size of the apartment, and once he was in there, Ryuji pulled himself back up to his feet. It was a lot easier to do when he had the kitchen counters to work with-- plus there was more room in there. 

Not knowing where to start looking, Ryuji decided to just start opening cabinets. There had to be something inside one of them, because he didn’t see any cat food bags sitting on top of the counter or anything.

The first cabinet he opened had a few dishes, bowls, and glasses. The second had a couple of bags of snacks as well as some canned soup. And the third had one pot in it. 

_One_ pot.

Ren really didn’t cook, did he?

Finally, deciding to try another cabinet proved to have multiple cans of cat food stacked on top of each other. Of _course_ Ren’s perfect baby would eat gourmet cat food, right? Wet food was the pinnacle of gourmet for felines, and the brand had Ryuji rolling his eyes. Ren spent more money on his cat than he really should. Hell, there was more food in his house for the cat than there was for the human that provided the home for it. Ryuji would never understand that.

As Ryuji pulled one of the cans from the cabinet, Morgana came trotting into the room and right to his empty food bowl, letting out a rather loud and needy meow as he looked to Ryuji. So he was hungry. Reading cats might get easier as time went on, but he was really hoping that Ren wasn’t neglecting his little friend. Then again, knowing his neighbor, Morgana was treated like a king. There were cat toys all over the apartment, and his cat bed looked incredibly comfortable-- even for human standards.

Looking to Morgana, Ryuji offered him a smile. “How’s tuna sound?” He asked, to which the response was another meow. Well, that was better than nothing.

Ryuji, very carefully, reached down and picked up the bowl on the floor. And that was when Morgana let out a stream of meows varying in range. For such a loud cat, Ryuji was surprised he didn’t hear him meowing more often…

The cat came closer to Ryuji, standing on his back legs and pressing his paws to the blonde’s leg, batting at his pants. 

“Geez, I’m hurrying. Calm down.” Ryuji muttered as he found a spoon from one of the drawers. Popping open the can, Ryuji emptied the contents into the bowl as soon as he could. The cat’s meowing was getting on his nerves. And as the stench of the cat food hit his nose, Ryuji let it crinkle a bit. Ugh. Cat food smelled horrible. How did Morgana even manage to eat it without throwing up?

And before he could even toss the spoon into the sink, Morgana was up on the counter and sticking his head into the bowl to eat. Damn cat. Ryuji sighed and pushed the bowl ot the back of the counter so there was less of a chance that it would fall to the ground and then tossed the spoon into the sink with a clang. 

Deciding he really wasn’t all that hungry and he could manage to wait for Ren to return home, Ryuji got back to his knees. He’d head back to the living room and play something on his computer until his neighbor got home, and then Ryuji would offer to pay for some type of take out.

In the back of his mind, Ryuji was hoping that Ren would bring home some curry as well.

He began his trip back to the living room when he heard the familiar sound of keys unlocking the front door, and he paused in the doorway of the kitchen so he wouldn’t be hit by the door when it swung open.

And when the door did open, it revealed a very tired looking Ren with multiple bags in hand. He seemed a little confused when he spotted Ryuji on the floor, eyebrow raising behind the frame of his glasses. 

A smirk spread across his lips as he closed and locked the door behind himself, stuffing his keys to the pocket of his jacket afterwards.

“That a position you’re used to?”

_Ren_.

Did he always have to make some weird sort of gay joke around Ryuji? Well, it wasn’t like Ryuji was _straight_ but he didn’t feel that the assumptions about his sexuality were necessarily needed so often. Still, he never did deny it.

“ _No_. I can’t walk on my bad leg, you jackass!”

He was rewarded with a chuckle after his yelling, and Ryuji could feel himself pout. No fair. Ren never took anything seriously.

But Ren did walk off pretty quickly after that, and Ryuji could hear the rustling of bags being put down before Ren appeared before him once again. Kneeling down, Ren scooped Ryuji up from under one of his arms and helped him to his feet.

The trip to the couch was much easier with Ren’s help, and Ryuji saw that the bags he’d been carrying were placed down on the coffee table.

“Thanks.” Ryuji muttered once he’d been sat down, and Ren responded with a nod.

Morgana seemed to be finished with his meal after that, and he came trotting into the living room and hopped up onto the coffee table with the bags, nosily poking his head into one of the bags to see what was inside. Why were cats so nosy? Weird. But Ren swatted him away a little bit and pulled a small paper bag from inside the bag.

He sat down on the floor beside the coffee table (and Ryuji wondered why he just hadn’t sat on the other side of the couch) and opened the bag, pulling out a small bottle of pills. Looking over the label, Ren read it off.

“Take one every six-to-eight hours. These are for your pain.” He said, then placing the bottle down next to Ryuji’s half-finished glass of water. Great. Ryuji couldn’t wait to start those, though taking one now might not be a good idea. He’d just taken some other medicine recently, so he’d wait a couple of hours before taking something else.

Even though his ankle still really did hurt.

Another small bag was pulled from the plastic bag as well as a few drink options and they were placed on the table as well. 

“What’s in there?” Ryuji asked as he motioned to the second paper bag.

A smile weaved onto Ren’s face before he stuck his tongue out at Ryuji. “None of your business.” He said, standing up and taking the bag to the bathroom. Huh. That was weird. Ren was still hiding something, huh?

“Help yourself to a drink!” He called from the bathroom and Ryuji looked to the options that had been placed on the table.

Energy drinks? Ren really knew how to please Ryuji, huh? He picked up one of them and looked over the label to find the flavor. It wasn’t a brand that Ryuji had ever really thought to buy, but he was willing to give it a shot. Popping open the tab, Ryuji took a sip of the drink. Not bad.

And by the time he was done with the sip, Ren was back in the living room and sorting through the other bags on the table. A few snack food items, a couple of sodas-- all things that Ryuji noted that he liked. Ren knew him pretty well, huh? And then he pulled a small, flat ticket-looking item from the bag.

Ryuji knew the look of a scratch-off ticket anywhere. 

“Thought you might like this.” Ren said with a soft chuckle afterwards. Well, it was something to do, right?

The ticket was tossed onto the coffee table by his pills, and then Ren pulled the items from the very last bag. Two take-out containers stacked on top of each other. Ryuji could feel himself drooling already. 

“And dinner.”

Oh, the idea of eating some Leblanc curry made Ryuji so happy. It was almost worth getting hurt over.

Almost.

Reaching out and taking the top container, Ryuji pulled it to his lap with a smile. Opening it only proved that he was getting some delicious curry.

And good curry could heal any wound.

Ren sat back with his own container and a plastic fork after passing Ryuji one as well, looking to the blonde with a smile.

Thinking for a moment, Ryuji sighed. Ren had been nothing but supportive of him since they’d first met, but he still needed to figure out what he’d been so focused on hiding from him. 

Today was a break, but tomorrow he’d start the search.


	11. Investigation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me, writing chapter one: This story should turn out to be eleven chapters!  
> Me, posting chapter eleven: _We're not even close to the climax_
> 
> Enjoy!

Poor Ren had been so tired that night. Ryuji was sure it was that he’d had to go to bed so late because of the injury Ryuji had gotten. He did have to wake up early to go to work, so that probably didn’t help at all. But he’d gone to bed so early that Ryuji honestly felt pretty bad. He’d have to make it up to him once his leg felt better.

Ren, having gone to bed just a couple of hours after dinner, was awake a little earlier than he usually was, but he seemed to be a lot livelier than the previous day. Ryuji didn’t mind the company. He’d sat up alone most of the night while his neighbor slept, so the option to have someone (besides Morgana) to talk to was nice.

Ren was sitting on an armchair by the open window with a cigarette, curled up in the chair with a blanket and his ashtray. Ryuji wasn’t sure how he could be sitting there in the cold comfortably while Ryuji was freezing his ass off a few feet away.

Huddled under his own blanket, Ryuji shivered. 

“Are you almost done? It’s _freezing_.” Not to mention the smell of cigarettes was invading the whole apartment. If only Morgana wanted to sit on his lap now. Maybe a small heater would make him feel better. But the cat seemed perfectly content in his owner’s lap instead.

The response Ryuji received was just a chuckle. “Almost.”

Even the hot chocolate that Ren had fixed for him that morning didn’t help. When the whole window was open, there really was no escape from the cold. Unless he decided to take a bath. But even then the bathroom would be too cold because of the rest of the apartment. 

But Ren was closer to being done than Ryuji had initially thought. He stumped out the cigarette and then turned to close the window behind himself. Standing up, he took the few short steps over to Ryuji and plopped Morgana onto his lap. 

“I’ll turn up the heat.”

Oh, thank _god_.

At least Ryuji wouldn’t freeze to death now. And as Ren disappeared into some portion of the apartment-- Ryuji assumed it was towards the thermometer, Ryuji took the time to hug Morgana.

The cat didn’t seem incredibly pleased with the outcome of his new bed and he tried to pull away, but Ryuji refused to let him. He was so nice and warm, and it was the only relief that the blonde had from the unforgiving cold. 

Poor Morgana. He wasn’t happy.

But after Ren wandered back into the living room section of the apartment, Ryuji let him go. Hopefully it would warm up quickly.

Morgana quickly hopped over to Ren and meowed loudly. 

“Is it time for breakfast?” Ren asked as he looked down at the cat, a warm smile on his lips. If there was anything Ryuji had learned about his neighbor, it was that he loved his cat more than anything else. And he _really_ loved to baby talk him. Then again, he wasn’t alone. Ryuji had caught himself doing the same thing the day before.

Morgana only let out another meow, and Ren chuckled as he turned to go back to the kitchen with Morgana hot on his heels.

That cat really liked to talk, huh? He always had _something_ to say. And he was loud too. 

Damn thing.

He was cute though. Especially when he was curled up against Ryuji’s side and purring. Or when he was playing with one of the thousand toys that littered the apartment floor. He seemed to like the toys with feathers the most. And catnip? He went crazy for that. And Ren had once shown Ryuji just how crazy Morgana went for the laser pointer. He’d have to ask Ren to leave it out for him sometime. Maybe he could fill some of his newfound free time with playing a game with Morgana.

Maybe.

His computer _did_ take up a lot of his time. 

But after Morgana was good and fed, it seemed like it was about time that Ren got ready for work. He was currently rooting through a dresser on the far side of the room.

The only light on in the apartment was from the kitchen, and it lit up the living area in a dull yellow light. For a moment Ryuji noted how dark it actually was in the corner of the rom that Ren had placed his dresser, and he wondered if his neighbor would be able to pick out a matching outfit at all.

And then Ryuji remembered that Ren’s clothing was all really… Neutral colored. 

Plenty of blue and black jeans, and more often than not his shirts were black, white, or even tan. Of course there was the occasional trace of red breaking the pattern, but his clothing just seemed pretty… Dull.

For the most part.

Ryuji’s own clothing was much more colorful, From purple to yellow, and from orange to blue, Ryuji definitely stood out next to Ren. And it certainly wasn’t for his looks-- Ryuji was sure he was nowhere near as devilishly handsome as his neighbor was. 

But let’s just say if Ryuji had to be critiqued for his clothing, he’d probably get slaughtered with harsh words.

But did that matter? Ryuji liked bright colors, and clothing that was comfortable was the most important.

Ren seemed to not be bothered by Ryuji’s presence in the room though, and he slipped his nightshirt over his head and tossed it onto his bed. If anything, the only colorful pieces of clothing Ryuji had ever seen on the black haired male was saved for pajamas.

But Ryuji did find himself curious. Pulling his hands up to his chin to hide his prying eyes, Ryuji glanced over at the other male. And then he would admit that he was…

_Disappointed_.

Did Ren really have to be so _attractive_? From muscles moving beneath the skin of his triceps to the faint outline as an early sign of abs, Ren just seemed _perfect_. It was like he always had to one-up Ryuji.

But he _did_ have something to hide. And Ryuji had to remember that.

So maybe he wasn’t so perfect.

But, for the time being, Ryuji allowed himself to pout at the thought that his friend was incredibly attractive from head to toe and he looked away, pulling the blankets up over his mouth to hide it.

Ren was horrible. He was smart, funny, popular, kind, and, worst of all, _hot_. It was no fair. He had it all, huh?

But Ryuji really didn’t want to look away. It wasn’t weird to check out your neighbor, right? With how good-looking Ren was, could you blame him? Of course no one could have. 

But it was definitely weird to check out your neighbor out of the blue like this.

And, unfortunately for Ryuji, Ren had already shirted himself by the time he looked back to him. Armed in a long-sleeved white shirt, Ren opted to drape a pair of jeans over his shoulder before he disappeared from view once again. Probably heading to the bathroom to finish dressing, huh?

And it was correct. Ryuji could hear the sink running after a few moments and the familiar sound of teeth being brushed could be heard in the distance. 

It was pretty unfortunate that Ren would have to leave for work so soon, but Ryuji was ready to spring into action. He had to do a little bit of snooping around the apartment. The fact that something was being hidden from him so obviously was really getting to him, and Ryuji needed to know what Ren was trying to get him to not find out about.

Sitting up on the couch after that, Ryuji was just in time to spot Ren leaning over the back of the couch, a smile on his face. 

“I’m heading out.” He was reaching behind himself with one hand, and upon glancing over the back of the couch, Ryuji could see that he was pulling on an old pair of sneakers. It was the last thing he had to do before heading out, huh?

And after he was done with the shoes, Ren leaned on the back of the coch with both arms.

“Is there anything you need before I go?”

Sighing, Ryuji just smiled slightly. He was disappointed that he would be lonesome during the day, but this was for the better. Ryuji was going to play detective today. Still, it was sad to know that he was going to be pretty much alone all day. 

At least he could sleep most of it away. He was starting to feel a little tired, after all.

“I’m fine.”

With the food that Ren had brought home yesterday, Ryuji would have plenty to eat while he was at work. And as annoying as it was, Ryuji could get around the house just fine. Maybe not on his feet, but crawling was a good idea the day before. It got the job done and it was painless.

“You could bring more curry home though.” It was good. Really good.

“Not a bad idea.” Ren’s smile only grew at the suggestion, and he stood upright after that, his hands on his hips. “Well, see you later then.”

And with a half-hearted salute, Ryuji let out a soft chuckle. “See ya!”

It really wasn’t bad sitting at Ren’s place all day. It was much more furnished than Ryuji’s apartment, and he supposed that Morgana was decent enough company.

And after Ren left the apartment, Ryuji sat. And he waited.

He didn’t want to spring into action too quickly. If Ren had to come back home for something, Ryuji really didn’t want to be spotted rooting through his drawers or anything. The kitchen had proved to be clean aside from the normal kitchenware yesterday, but hopefully today would be a lot better. 

Granted, he wasn’t exactly _looking_ for anything yesterday. Aside from cat food.

Either way, Ryuji decided to play on his computer for a little bit before jumping into action. A quick few matches in one of his favorite games would be enough to distract him for a little bit, right?

And it did. Before Ryuji knew it, it’d already been over an hour since Ren left. It had been long enough for any worry of Ren coming back home to be long over. Now it was Ryuji’s time to spring into action.

Closing his laptop and setting in onto the couch beside himself, Ryuji immediately got to his knees. The first step was the side table. Ryuji was sure Ren had stuffed something into there the first time he’d visited, so there was a chance that was his usual hiding spot. Right?

Crawling over to the bed, Ryuji climbed on top of it, proceeding to just lay down on top of the bed. The blankets were already left bunched up and Ren’s clothing was all piled on top of it. Hell, he barely registered that there was a laptop half-hidden beneath some of the covers. His neighbor wasn’t exactly a _clean_ housekeeper. He definitely left things pretty messy. But he was a bit childish. Ryuji wasn’t really expecting much out of him, honestly.

Feet dangling over the side of the bed, Ryuji reached out and took hold of the small handle on the front of the drawer to the side table. Okay, here it goes. 

He pulled and the drawer was a lot lighter than he thought it’d be. Sliding out a little more forcefully than he’d intended, Ryuji sat up on top of his elbow to peer inside of the drawer. 

There sure was a lot of junk inside.

Everything from a glasses case to a permanent marker? Huh. Seemed like just a bunch of random things.

Pulling out the glasses case, Ryuji flipped it open. Inside there was a cloth for cleaning glasses as well as some sort of spray. Frowning, Ryuji picked up the small spray bottle and looked it over. Thinking about it, Ryuji had never seen Ren without his glasses.

Even right before bed or after taking a shower, Ren wore his glasses. Even if they’d fogged up after his shower, he still exited the bathroom with them perched upon his nose. Sure, he had to look over the rims of the glasses, but… Wasn’t it kind of weird to never take them off?

Well, he most likely took them off right before bed. But Ryuji hadn’t seen it. And he wondered what Ren did look like without his glasses. Was he more handsome? Sure, his glasses sort of gave him a pretty _adorable_ kind of vibe, but his pretty face still shone through.

Rolling his eyes, Ryuji stuffed the bottle back into the glasses case and then tossed it back into the drawer. Well, onto the next item, he figured.

Rooting into the drawer blindly, Ryuji’s fingers soon came into contact with something long, slender, and cold. It felt like metal.

Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji tugged the object out to look at it. Oh. It was that weird brush he’d found on the ground before. Weird.

Ryuji still wondered what it was used for. It was probably to clean something up. But with those strong bristles? Ryuji would be afraid he’d scratch something. He bet that it’d be great for getting into some tight spaces though.

Tossing that back into the drawer, Ryuji began rifling through it again. There was a pack of gum, some pens, a graphing calculator (for whatever reason), what looked like a handkerchief that was so soft it felt sort of like velvet, some sticky notes, a stray cat toy…

Boring.

But then he spotted something.

At the bottom of the drawer-- a long, curved item. It was the color of brass and one end came to a point while the other was flat. Eyes widening, Ryuji pulled what appeared to be a _bullet_ from the drawer.

He felt himself gasp audibly. A bullet? _Why did Ren have a bullet_?

Did that mean that he had a _gun_?

And it was _huge_.

What the hell was he hunting? Elephants?

It easily fit in the palm of Ryuji’s hand. It was cold and heavy, and Ryuji felt sick to his stomach. The longer he held it the worse he felt.

And he almost dropped it.

Almost.

But if he wanted to know something more about this (most likely incredibly dangerous) neighbor of his, he had to keep investigating.

Swallowing a heavy lump in his throat, Ryuji turned the bullet over in his hand. Maybe he could find out more about it. Did it have the size written anywhere on it? The brand? What kind of gun it was used for?

Ryuji didn’t know shit about guns.

But it was so _heavy_. And just holding it filled him with dread.

Ryuji had never even seen a bullet in person before, but there was no mistaking it. It sure was a _bullet_. He’d seen enough action movies to know what they looked like.

But as he turned it over in his hand, he frowned.

There was a hole in the side of it near the flat part. Dd that mean it was used? _Had Ren killed something_?

Feeling like he could throw up, Ryuji covered his mouth with his free hand. 

There was no need to get worked up over it. He had to keep looking. What if it was all a misunderstanding?

In fact, the pointed part would be the bit that was gone if the bullet was spent, right? Right.

Ryuji took a deep breath before looking more closely at the hole.

It was round but with one flat edge, and looking inside proved that the bullet was empty. So there really wasn’t anything to worry about with it… Right? Right.

Ryuji had _nothing_ to worry about. Ren was a great guy. He was kind and cool, and he was far too gentle to own a _real_ bullet. He would never hurt a fly.

_Right_?

Deciding that maybe rooting through Ren’s things was a dangerous idea and that he was better left in the dark for the most part, Ryuji almost _threw_ the bullet back into the drawer.

He closed it just as violently (if not more so) as he had opened it and then sighed. He draped his arms over the side of the bed and rest his chin against the mattress. Well, now he was just worried. Worried and upset with his findings. He hadn’t solved _anything_. In fact, he’d only opened up more questions. Ugh.

_Why_?

Why did Ryuji have to get caught up in a mess like this? He liked Ren. He liked Ren _a lot_. But knowing that he might not be able to _trust_ him? His _one_ friend? Ren had been there for him since they’d first met. He’d done nothing but help Ryuji. From bringing him dinner to taking him in while he needed healing, Ren never once hinted that he’d ever turn his back on Ryuji. All he ever did was _help_.

_And he never asked for one thing in return_.

And for a moment Ryuji felt pretty guilty. It was clear that Ren trusted him and cared about him, but why couldn’t he trust his neighbor in return?

And now with the bullet…

But Ryuji must have been laying on the bed for a while. In fact, he must have fallen asleep, because the next thing his mind began to register was the sound of a lock being unlocked.

But it didn’t immediately wake him up. Nor did the soft footsteps that grew louder as they got closer.

No, instead he didn’t register anything until he heard a voice.

“Comfortable?”


	12. Best Friends

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The worst part about writing is coming up with chapter titles. Enjoy!

Huh? Who was that?

Blinking his eyes open, Ryuji got up to his elbows. He rubbed one of his eyes gently, groaning a little bit. Judging from the position he’d woken up in, Ryuji had been sleeping with his head on his arms. The spot on the bed beside himself was warm as if Morgana had been sleeping beside him, but he was more concerned about the voice he’d heard. 

Looking up above himself, he noticed that there was a shadow being cast over him by none other than Ren. What? Had he really slept that long?How long had it been since he’d fallen asleep? If Ren was home, then…

It’d already been long enough for him to have gone to work and then come home? That meant Ryuji had slept the whole day! So much for looking around the apartment a little bit longer… Not that he was really sure he wanted to anymore. Not since his latest discovery…

“Oh. Hey…” Ryuji muttered, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. He really hadn’t meant to sleep so long…

Ren was smirking though, hands crossed over his chest as he looked down at Ryuji. “If you wanted to sleep on the bed, you should have let me know.” 

Well, it wasn’t like the couch was uncomfortable. The bed was really nice, but… Wait.

Looking down, it was if the idea that he’d actually fallen asleep on Ren’s bed hadn’t even occurred to Ryuji. _Shit_. That was embarrassing. How was he supposed to talk his way out of this one? Coming home to see your neighbor spontaneously sleeping in your bed was probably really strange. But Ren had told him to make himself at home… Maybe that would be a decent enough response.

Opening his mouth to speak, Ryuji wasn’t even able to get a word out before he heard the voice of another male.

“All right! Ren, I put them in the refrigerat- who’s your friend?”

The male in question was quite a bit shorter than Ren, his height only coming to about the height of Ryuji’s neighbor’s shoulder. He had dark navy hair, and his eyebrows were raised in shock. Clearly he hadn’t expected someone else to be in the house with them.

“You didn’t tell me you had a boyfriend…” The male looked up at Ren, and Ryuji swore that he looked hurt and almost betrayed by the thought of having a secret kept from him. That was kind of weird. Wasn’t Ren allowed to have a private life? Then again, Ryuji was really trying to get in the way of that as well.

Wait

 _Boyfriend_?!

“I ain’t his boyfriend!” The words came out of Ryuji’s mouth before he’d been able to apply a filter to them. And, really, he wouldn’t have even if he’d been able to think before he said them. He and Ren were _not_ dating. He wasn’t anyone’s boyfriend! As much as he wouldn’t mind having someone cute to date, Ryuji was single and probably not ready to mingle. 

Then again, having someone to cuddle and kiss really wouldn’t be a bad idea at all.

Ren gave Ryuji a sympathetic smile before reaching down and picking up the apparent cat at his feet, cuddling Morgana to his chest as he looked back over to the new male. 

“He’s my neighbor.”

The blue haired male looked from Ren to Ryuji, and then back to Ren again, a look of confusion on his face. What was with this new guy? 

“Not again!”

 _Again_? What the hell was that supposed to mean?

Ren did chuckle though, shaking his head. “It’s not like that, Yuuki.”

“Like _what_?” Ryuji hated the feeling of being left in the dark. What were they even talking about? Was Ren infamous for sleeping with his neighbors or something? With Ryuji having been found sleeping in his bed, it was likely that was what prompted the statement about Ryuji being Ren’s boyfriend. Still, the blonde did _not_ want to be seen as Ren’s boyfriend.

Remember. A saucy affair with his downstairs neighbor was not what Ryuji really wanted. It just seemed weird. Like something out of a movie.

This _Yuuki_ looked skeptical though, his hands on his hips.

“You’d better not be getting yourself into any trouble.”

“Relax.” Ren said as he shoved his cat into Yuuki’s chest. The shorter male let out a sound akin to a squeak as he took the feline-- his previous tough-guy demeanor switching to one much less intimidating.

Not that he’d been intimidating at all before.

“He hurt his ankle. He’s staying here while he heals.”

Ryuji had sat upright by the time Ren reached down to take him by the arm, hoisting him up as they both grunted. They were really getting good at this kind of thing, huh? From Ren helping Ryuji to and from the couch, it was like they were thinking alike now. It was great. It made for less pain in his ankle.

The trip to the couch was short, and Ren seemed to take the time to fix up the cushions a little-- likely to try and make Ryuji a little more comfortable there.

“Oh, you hurt your ankle?” Yuuki asked as he wandered to the front of the couch. “Is it serious?”

Ren went to speak, but Ryuji thought it best he answered himself. It was _his_ ankle, after all, and he was a big boy. He could talk about his own problems.

“I just slipped on ice. It’s a sprain.” Sitting back on the couch, Ryuji lifted his bad leg and placed his foot atop the coffee table. Keeping it elevated as probably a good idea, right? That was what his mom had always told him when he hurt something leg-related, and when he broke his leg, Ryuji had to keep that up high as well. Who knew if it actually helped-- it could have had a placebo effect, but he liked to think it did. “I have medicine for it though!” 

Speaking of, he probably should pay Ren back for the medicine...

Yuuki cringed a little bit at the mention of the sprain, but he moved to the window that Ren usually used to climb out to the firescape from. He picked up the step stool that Ren used as well, bringing it closer to the couch and sitting on it. It did seem like it gave him trouble though. He was still holding Morgana, after all.

“Well, if you need something while I’m here, you just have to ask.”

That was kind of him. Ren had a lot of nice friends, huh?

“My name is Yuuki, by the way! I’m Ren’s best friend!”

Oh. That sounded a little cocky, didn’t it? At least he was confident about it.

Yuuki reached out with one hand, holding Morgana carefully on his lap. Ryuji took it and gave him a firm handshake, smiling.

“Ryuji. Nice to meet ya!”

Ren had wandered off while the two spoke, but he did return to the living room after that. He had three beverages in hand, and he placed them all on the coffee table, then picking up Ryuji’s water glass. Looking over to the blonde after that, he smiled. “We ordered pizza on the way here. It should be here soon.”

“Yeah! I was wondering why Ren ordered so much, but I guess there’s no choice but to order a second pizza if there’s three of us eating it.” Yuuki laughed at his own statement, and Ryuji couldn’t help but notice how adorable it sounded. Hell, Yuuki had proven to be nothing but cute since he’d come into Ryuji’s life, huh? He was energetic, if anything. It was actually pretty refreshing.

Picking up the soda that Ren had placed in front of him, Ryuji popped it open and brought the can to his lips. “Pizza? Sounds great!” He really wasn’t picky about flavors, but he did like sausage above the rest. There were certain things that never belonged on a pizza though. Like olives. Whose bright idea was it to put those devil orbs on _pizza_? It ruined a perfectly good food.

He sipped his drink.

Morgana had finally wrangled his way out of Yuuki;s grasp, and he hopped to Ren’s feet, meowing at him. 

Looking down at the cat, Ren just made a few kissing noises towards him. He really did baby that cat, didn’t he?

“Is it dinner time, buddy?” And with that, Ren disappeared back to the kitchen once again. 

And that was when Ryuji noticed Yuuki scooting closer to him, and he looked to the shorter male to see him scooching the stool closer to the couch. Once he was satisfied with it’s new location, Yuuki leaned forward a little bit.

“You said your name is Ryuji? Ren’s mentioned you a few times.” It was like he was scared of being caught gossiping about his friend. But, seriously, what was he getting at?

Confused, Ryuji raised an eyebrow. He leaned against the back of the couch, laying one arm over the top of it. He really didn’t have any intention of hiding what they were talking about. Well, unless it was something juicy. Sipping his soda once more, Ryuji frowned. 

“Yeah? What about me?”

“Oh, it’s nothing bad!” Yuuki said, waving a hand in front of his face. “He just says… _A lot_.”

A lot? This Yuuki guy was really weird. Just what was he hinting at? If this was going to go back to the whole _boyfriend_ thing, then he could count Ryuji out. Nope. Not with his neighbor. This was _not_ a shojo manga.

“Right…” Ryuji muttered in obvious skepticism. If Yuuki was trying to hook Ryuji up on a date with Ren, he was going to hop right out the window and climb the fire escape home. 

But Yuuki couldn’t press any further. The faint smell of coffee had entered the room by then, and with it came Ren. He flashed his phone at the two of them.

“Delivery guy called. He’s downstairs.”

Yuuki was to his feet in a moment, hands curled into fists in front of himself. “I’ll go get it!”

He left no room for protest, quickly making his way to the door and opening it. But before he left, he turned back towards the living area of the home.

“I won’t be gone long! Remember that!”

What.

And then he left, slamming the door closed behind himself.

The room was left silent after that-- the air cold and heavy. Just what Yuuki had said was just… Not normal. And here Ryuji was, thinking he was incredibly strange. He had nothing on Yuuki though.

“He’s… Something else.” Ryuji found himself muttering. He really was though, and Ryuji really wanted to cut the silence somehow, and it was really the only thing he could come up with to say.

In the corner of his eye he could see Ren shove his hands into his pockets. “You don’t know the half of it.”

He got _worse_?

Ryuji wasn’t sure he could handle that.

Regardless, Yuuki seemed nice so far… And he hoped his opinion of the other male wouldn’t stray from that. 

And Yuuki was right. He didn’t take long to respond. By the time he did, Ren was sitting on the couch, typing away at his laptop while Ryuji fiddled with his phone a little bit. 

“I’m back!” He called, and Ryuji could hear his shoes hitting the tiles of the kitchen floor. The sound of him rooting through cabinets was next to be heard, and then he appeared in the living room, scooting the things on the coffee table out of the way with the help of Ren. Well, it did seem like it was time to eat then, huh?

Ryuji placed his phone down on the table and got to serving himself.

Dinner had been nice. Pizza really hit the spot when Ryuji wasn’t feeling so hot. The bullet really had him worried, after all, but he wanted to trust Ren. He _really_ wanted to trust Ren. He was his friend.

But when he found something so concerning like that, he was sure he might have to learn to sleep with one eye open. Ren had always seemed a little dangerous to him, after all, and every time he had a new finding about his neighbor, Ryuji couldn’t help but feel the overwhelming anxiety that came with the worry that maybe-- just _maybe_ his neighbor wasn’t who he let himself on to be…

But the night ended up so pleasant. Yuuki sitting on the couch beside Ryuji and Ren on his favorite armchair by the slightly ajar window. A lit cigarette lay forgotten and burning in an ashtray, and a cat that Ren had mentioned was at one time a stray was sprawled across the only available part of the couch-- partially behind Yuuki and the other part between he and Ryuji as they leaned forward. 

A card game of Dai Fugo was spread out on the coffee table. Ryuji had been warned to never play poker against Ren. Apparently he was so good everyone assumed he cheated.

Yuuki and Ren had hot cups of coffee while Ryuji was forced into trying out Yuuki’s apparent friend-famous loaded mug of hot chocolate. And Ren had been right. It was delicious. But although Ryuji loved marshmallows, there might have been just a _few_ too many in his mug.

The night ended up so pleasantly, and Ryuji was sad to see Yuuki go once he’d realised just how late it’d become. With the promise to return soon, he was out the door and Ryuji was left alone with Ren.

Without Yuuki it was much more quiet in the apartment. He’d been so active and excited the entire time he was there, and Ryuji did find it endearing. But now that he was alone with Ren, he couldn’t help but feel just a bit nervous again.

Ren did seem tired though, and it was definitely far past his bedtime. Standing from his chair, he turned to the window and closed it just like he had that morning, and then he turned back to Ryuji, a smirk on his face.

“Would you rather sleep in my bed? Maybe with me?”

Ryuji had been in the middle of sipping his drink when Ren spoke, and he almost spat the beverage out across the room. Choking on it (and praying Ren wouldn’t make a dirty joke about that), Ryuji pat his bed.

“I told you earlier it was an accident!”

“Right.” Ren said, rolling his eyes. He wandered past the couch and to his bed, shamelessly stripping himself of his shirt, and Ryuji had to force himself to keep his gaze ahead, pouting behind the rim of his soda can. He’d been through quite a lot of them that night. “And how was it an accident?”

Ryuji felt himself groan, and he pressed a hand to his forehead. “I was on my way to take a shower, and I couldn’t make it! It hurt!” Okay, so it was a lame excuse.

But Ren had climbed into his bed by the time Ryuji had finished speaking, opting to leave his light on while he laid back, leaning up on his elbows. 

“Of course. I believe it.” Sarcastic asshole. He didn’t believe Ryuji at all. Was he suspicious of him as well?

Suddenly Ryuji felt his blood turn cold and he swore he’d turned pale under his neighbor’s gaze. He tried to hide it behind his drink once again though.

“Well, good night, Ryuji.” Ren muttered after that, and Ryuji felt himself sigh.

He looked over to Ren, who was still watching him. “Good night.”

Ren was smiling though.

“I’m off tomorrow. We’ll find something fun to do together again.”

And since he was off, Ryuji knew that he wasn’t going to get another opportunity to root through the apartment for at least a couple of days. Still, maybe it would be nice having someone to stay with instead of spending all day alone like he’d been the last few days.

Even if the thought of spending too much alone time with Ren did scare him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to disappoint!


	13. Domesticity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter just did not want to be written. I'm so sorry for the delay! 
> 
> Enjoy!

Coming up with something to do for that day wasn’t difficult. Ren hadn’t had a home-cooked meal in a _long_ time. In fact, not once had he cooked something from scratch in his own home. Ryuji was going to change that. They were going to cook something together.

 _What_ they were going to cook would be a different story. 

Ryuji had never been the best chef in the world, but he never claimed to be. He knew the basics-- as he’d learned them from his own mother, but that was more than enough, right?

His mother was such a lovely cook. If only she could come over and teach Ren a thing or two as well. Then maybe he wouldn’t be so thin.

Living with Ren had only proved that he didn’t really eat _often_ , but when he did, oh _boy_ did he eat. He could down two helpings of curry to every one of Ryuji’s. It was crazy. His stomach was like a black hole, though very rarely did he ever feel hungry. 

It was almost like he forced himself to eat. Or at least it would be if he didn’t eat so much in one sitting.

Perhaps he only forgot to eat unless someone made him. And you can bet your ass Ryuji made him eat. Surviving on coffee and eating nothing but one huge meal a day was _not_ healthy. And since Ren was Ryuji’s friend, he was going to be forced to eat more healthily. At least while they were rooming together. 

Ryuji’s ankle was feeling much better though. That meant he was probably due to moving back home soon.

And that thought both saddened and relieved him.

Ren was his _friend_. They were buddies. Pals. But he couldn’t stay in Ren’s apartment for forever, and he’d already spent quite a bit of time there. But, in reality, Ryuji wanted to be home. He missed his own shitty little apartment. 

As lonely as it was, he wanted to be able to have the freedom of walking around naked whenever he liked. That wasn’t really something you could do in your neighbor’s house. Granted, with Ren’s attitude, he probably wouldn’t care. But morally? It wasn’t right. It wasn’t like they were at a bathhouse or something. But that would have been an entirely different sort of situation.

Ren was kind enough to run baths for Ryuji often though. So having a temporary roommate for that was nice.

A bath sounded nice at the moment though.

But there was something else that Ryuji was planning for the day. He could take a bath later. 

He’d sent Ren off to the grocery store with a list a while ago. Ryuji was planning on making dinner, and he needed ingredients for it. As for what was in the kitchen, it was probably severely lacking in utensils. He certainly didn’t have many bowls or plates.

But he was a bachelor. A bachelor that lived mostly off of canned foods and take out. He was living the life, huh? Ryuji wished he had the money to eat take out all the time. Then again, that wasn’t exactly _healthy_.

Maybe if he was living off of Leblanc curry he wouldn’t worry about that though.

Wondering when Ren would get home though, Ryuji took a glance back to the front door. He certainly was taking his time. It’d been a _long_ while since he left for the grocery store. If he never really went though, he was probably having a bit of trouble finding the ingredients.

Not that Ryuji had given him difficult to find ingredients.

Given the ingredients that Ryuji needed, he probably had to head to an Asian market to get them. Maybe he went to the one on the way to Leblanc. But he really was taking his time. Then again, all of the specialty ingredients could be found at Ryuji’s home as well. So maybe Ren just went to the closest store… 

Ryuji scratched behind the ears of the cat in his lap, smiling down at him as well. Morgana really did like to cuddle. He was a great sleeping buddy. Really cuddly and loved being pet. He did seem pretty attached to Ren while he was home, but Ryuji got to relish in all of the cuddles while Ren was asleep or not home.

“He’s taking a while, huh?” Ryuji asked. He only received a purr in response. 

Morgana wasn’t really great with conversation.

Then again, he was a cat. 

Ryuji did feel bad having to get up. As much as he couldn’t stay on the couch for forever, he didn’t want to disturb Morgana. He was comfortable, and Ryuji knew just how annoying it was to get up when you were so comfortable.

Well, Ren wasn’t home yet, so they didn’t have to worry about that for now. 

Ryuji grabbed his phone off of the armrest on the couch and decided to browse that while he waited. He did have text messages to respond to. 

Ann sent him a picture of her and Shiho while they were on a date. Cute.

And Hifumi sent him a message asking if he needed anything. Like any good friend, she seemed concerned about his ankle.

Responding to both messages, Ryuji brought up the browser on his phone. But it seemed like his enjoyment was short-lived. Morgana hopped off of his lap and ran to the front door. Oh. It looked like Ren was home. Great. It looked like they could eat soon, and Ryuji’s stomach certainly wasn’t happy about not being fed yet.

It seemed like Ren head right to the kitchen after that, because he didn’t return to the living room for a few minutes. And when he did, he held the grocery list Ryuji had written for him out in his hand. 

There was a triumphant smile upon his lips like he was happy to accomplish his goal. 

Holding the paper out in front of his face, he read off the ingredients. 

“Thin-sliced beef, onion, scallion, pickled red ginger, rice, and eggs from the market. Oil, sugar, mirin and soy sauce from upstairs. And sake from the liquor store.” He was proud of himself, huh? Maybe it was the first time he’d spent an extended period of time gathering ingredients from the store. 

At least the things from Ryuji’s place weren’t tough to find.

Ryuji did allow himself to smile though, holding out a thumbs up to his friend. “Great! Sounds like ya got everything!”

Ren was still smiling when his hand went from holding the slip of paper in the air to resting on his hip. You know, it was actually pretty cute how pleased with himself he was. But the idea of finally eating was much more pleasing to Ryuji.

He stood-- able to do so on his own if he was starting on his good leg. And since his ankle didn’t hurt so much anymore, Ryuji had been able to walk around the apartment on his own. He would limp, but it was at least successful. And it didn’t hurt so much. Hopefully he’d be able to go back to work in the early week.

Brushing past Ren, Ryuji made his way to the kitchen with little (if any) help. He felt Ren on his heels though, so he made sure not to stop until they were well established at their end goal. He didn’t want to be walked into, after all.

It looked like Ren had taken everything out of their bags when he’d gotten home. Maybe to make things more tidy, or maybe to double check that he had everything. Either way, it looked like he had all of the proper ingredients for dinner.

“Good job!” Ryuji said and Ren beamed as the blonde wandered to the counter with all of the items on it. He looked over them, picking up the small half-used bottle of soy sauce. He’d had it for a while, but did soy sauce ever really go bad? So long as it remained closed when not used, of course.

But cooking dinner for two people was bound to have him using up more ingredients than normally. Maybe it was about time he had to grab some new items instead of using these older ones. Maybe, if Ren was okay with it, Ryuji could cook for him on the occasion. 

Ryuji certainly wouldn’t mind it. He enjoyed cooking-- as little of it as he really did. 

It was always more fun to cook for other people though. It was just a chore when he was only doing it for himself. 

But Ren was fun, and spending time with Ren was fun. Even if it was a bit nerve-wracking nowadays. More so than it had been before.

That bullet really had Ryuji concerned. But he’d yet to find a gun. Then again he hadn’t gone snooping since finding that discovery…

“What are you making?” Ren was by his side in an instant, looking over Ryuji’s shoulder at the items sprawled out before them. Ryuji had to admit that the sudden close contact was a little bit weird, but he didn’t pull away. They were friends, after all, but they’d been much closer than just a light brushing against each other-- especially since Ryuji’s accident.

Placing the bottle of soy sauce back down, Ryuji turned to Ren with a smile. “Gyudon!”

Or course a Japanese dish. That was what Ryuji knew best, after all. His mother was a fantastic chef, and she knew all sorts of Japanese dishes-- everything from A to Z.

And he had made him gyudon more than he’d like to admit. It was one of his favorites, after all.

Unfortunately, though, Ren didn’t really have many utensils. At least he had a pot and a (small) frying pan. Ryuji could work with those. But he really did need a decent knife. The dull steak knives that Ren had in the drawers really weren’t going to cut it (pun intended) when Ryuji had to slice the onion.

Ren seemed pleased with the idea that Ryuji had come up with, and he was also smiling. Unfortunately, Ryuji was going to have to send him out again though.

“All right.” Ryuji began, and he spotted Ren beginning to frown. Oh. So he was expecting to be told some bad news, huh? Oh well. Maybe if he’d stocked his kitchen better he wouldn’t have to worry about being sent out to fetch some more items.

“I need you to go back to my place again.”

Tilting his head to the side a little bit, Ren was indeed frowning. His shoulders slumped slightly as well. “I thought I got everything.” Ryuji wasn’t expecting him to sound so _disappointed_.

“No!” He said, frowning as well. Poor Ren seemed upset. But Ryuji had to make it up to him! “You did!” He said, then turning and reaching into one of the drawers. He pulled out one of the aforementioned dull knives and showed it to Ren. “I just can’t cut anything with this. Or without a cutting board.”

Ren seemed to brighten up again after that. Maybe he’d just been nervous that he’d disappointed Ryuji or something. It was a small fix though.

“All right.” Ren was smiling. He tugged the key to Ryuji’s home from his pocket and jingled it in his hand for a moment. “I’ll be back then.”

Nodding, Ryuji smiled in return. “Thanks. Sorry about that.”

Ren didn’t say anything in response, and instead he just gave Ryuji a wave as he wandered out of the apartment.

And Ryuji decided that he could get out the remaining items while he waited. He rooted through various cabinets and was eventually successful in successful in finding the items that he knew Ren had.

The pot and the pan were set on the stove, and he had to rummage through the cabinet just a little bit more to find the lid for the pot. He filled it with a little bit of water and then set it to boil, and once that’d been done, Ren was wandering back into the house with the items he’d been sent to find.

He placed them onto the countertop and then stood back and in the doorway, watching as Ryuji moved around the small kitchen.

“What can I help with?”

 _Help_? Ryuji wasn’t expecting _help_ , but it wasn’t…. Unwelcome. In fact, it might be fun to have a little help.

But… Maybe Ren shouldn’t be holding the knife in such a close proximity to Ryuji. It was already dangerous enough that he was cornered in the kitchen while Ren had one earlier, wasn’t it?

But what else could he do? Gyudon was really a one-man job…

Pressing a finger to his lips, Ryuji thought for a moment. He looked over the ingredients for a bit before spotting the rice.

“Ah! The rice!” It was the easiest part of the meal, but Ryuji didn’t know just _how_ hopeless Ren was with cooking. It was better to start off small, right?

Rice was easy too. Almost too easy. Ren could handle it. And Ryuji was right next to him. Just in case. If anything were bound to happen at least the blonde could help. 

Reaching to the pot of water, Ryuji tapped the handle of it and then looked to Ren. “When this boils, add some rice to it. I’ll tell you how much when we get there. Then we simmer it for a while.” 

It wasn’t like either of them had a rice cooker, after all.

Ren seemed content with his new job, watching over the pot of water. They say a watched pot never boils, but if it kept him busy and away from teasing Ryuji, then the blonde would never complain. 

Ryuji go to chopping up the onions, tossing them into the pan and starting them to cook. Scallions were chopped next, and then by the time Ryuji had finished chopping the meat into smaller pieces, the water was boiling.

Cooking didn’t take too much longer after that. Of course, they’d been stuck waiting for the rice to finish cooking after the meat had been done, but it wasn’t too long.

Gyudon was a quick and easy dinner, and Ryuji was quite pleased with the meal that the two of them had come up with. Ren was, of course, not too bad at tasting the rice to make sure it was done. Ryuji did give it a second taste though just to make sure he was right when he’d mentioned that it was fine. No neighbor of his was going to ruin his meal.

And before they knew it, they were sitting down in the living room with their meals. Ren mentioned he wasn’t the biggest fan of pickled ginger, so he didn’t get a lot of it, but Ryuji had thoroughly filled his bowl with probably more than enough.

Or more than any normal person would eat. But someone had to eat Ren’s share, right? He was slacking, and Ryuji was making up for it.

With their bowls, Ryuji and Ren made their way to the sofa. Ren was kind enough to carry Ryuji’s bowl as he limped to their destination, leaning upon the various furniture around the room. It didn’t take long, and soon they were sitting down.

Morgana took complete advantage of the situation though, hopping up onto the couch beside Ryuji. He leaned forward, front paws on the blonde’s lap as he tried to get to the food in his bowl. Damn nosy cat. He just _had_ to get into everything, didn’t he?

“Hey!” Ryuji said, gently shoving him back with one hand. “You had your dinner! It’s my turn! Damn cat…”

It was a good thing that Ren wasn’t easily offended though. He chuckled in response, pleaning over Ryuji’s lap and he grabbed the cat from under his stomach. Dragging him to his side of the couch, Ren set Morgana in his lap as he did his best to hold the bowl safely above the feline’s head.

He didn’t seem to be having an easy time eating because of his cat, but he didn’t complain either. Watching the two interact was always a pretty funny experience. Ren always seemed so calm, and he dealt with the cat’s shit a hell of a lot easier than anyone else ever seemed to.

He really did care about Morgana, huh? Ren had mentioned something about them both being strays in the past. Some cheesy bullshit about finding a home in each other. But as dumb as it sounded, Ryuji couldn’t help but feel that it was a very Ren thing to say. He acted much like the mysterious love interest from a shoujo manga or something.

Ryuji wasn’t looking to be the main character.

Sighing though when he spotted Ren trying to sneak a small bite of the meat from his dish to the cat, Ryuji reached over and nudged him. 

“Hey. That’s people food.” He couldn’t help but crack a smile.

“He’s a person too.”

Ren was always a little brat, wasn’t he? Not that Ryuji minded. It was refreshing, and something about his neighbor really just intrigued him.

Even though he was still a little nervous around him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I try to update this story multiple times during the week-- and I definitely get one out on each of my days off. Unfortunately, my next day off falls on my birthday, and I'll be a little busy this week. If I don't get to update until next week, I'm so sorry! I promise I'll get the next chapter up as soon as I possibly can!
> 
> And, on top of that, I've taken on a lot of other projects! I have so much to write that I might be slightly delayed with this story. I really do apologize, and I hope you guys understand! Have a nice day!


	14. Early Hours

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is out so late! Enjoy!

Back to work, right? His ankle was finally starting to feel better, and he could finally get out to start earning money again. But earning money meant long, boring hours at work. 

If Ryuji could earn his money sitting in front of a computer and playing video games, then he could die happy. At least that was a fun job. 

And standing at the counter of a convenience store really wasn’t any fun at all. Especially not when rude customers were always around. There really wasn’t much good about working in customer service. With how many bad customers there were in comparison to the good ones, it could make almost any job miserable.

And tonight had been really long. Customers were coming in left and right, Ryuji’s stock person had called out, and his ankle was killing him. At least he could walk though, right? He’d made the choice to get a brace for it on his way into work, but it could only help so much when he had to bend up and down so much to put away items.

Ryuji hated the nights where he was left mostly alone. Though there was a manager on duty, he was often hiding himself back in the office so he could fool around on his phone for hours at a time.

Shift leaders really didn’t get enough credit for the work they had to do.

Ryuji took his time in stocking the shelves in the chip aisle though, whistling to himself. If he kept himself distracted he would forget the pain in his ankle, and perhaps time would run along a lot more smoothly. 

The store was empty save for a customer or two, as the apparent midnight rush was now over, so Ryuji could relax a little bit. When a customer came into the store, he just had to be patient until they were ready to check out. Usually it didn’t take that long for them to leave, and checking them out didn’t take long either. 

Stocking was a nice job though. It was relaxing and quite mindless. So much so that Ryuji barely registered that the door had opened and he could hear another customer wandering in. He couldn’t see the door from his spot on the ground in the aisle, but that was all right. As long as he could see the register, it didn’t really matter. 

But, after noting that, Ryuji did spot someone heading to the counter. Great. Up he got again.

Bracing himself on one of the boxes he was pulling items from, Ryuji did his best to stand as painlessly as possible. It wasn’t that hard-- he’d been getting used to it after all, and then he limped his way to the register. Leaning against the counter as he walked, Ryuji smiled at the woman before him.

“Morning!” He said as cheerfully as he could in his designated customer service voice. It was almost sickeningly sweet sounding. At least to Ryuji it was. But he knew himself better than anyone else. Of course he would know when he was lying to someone outright.

The woman returned his greeting, though a lot less cheerfully. It was almost two in the morning. Most people were tired at this hour. She wasn’t getting too many items though, and Ryuji was quick to ring her up. 

She seemed really tired though-- poor thing. Hopefully she would make it home all right. It was pretty late and the streets could be dangerous. He even thought to be careful as well on his way home every morning. He’d be in the same predicament as her in just a few hours. 

Once she was on her way, Ryuji gave her a wave goodbye. The bell rung as she exited the store, and he was about to turn to go back to stocking the shelves when he spotted someone else wandering to the counter from the corner of his eye.

It looked like the person who had wandered in while he was busy was ready to check out as well.

“G’mornin!” Ryuji chimned as he turned to the other male, only to spot a familiar face.

Ren was standing there, at the counter of _his_ convenience store at _two a.m._ reaching for money in his pocket.

Ren.

_Ren_.

What was he doing there so early in the morning? It was far too late for someone who worked early mornings to be awake. Ren could barely make it to ten at night without passing out. Hell ,the only time Ryuji had ever seen him up late was when he’d gotten hurt, and also that time that Yuuki had come to visit. 

But even then Ren had been almost painfully tired. It was so sad to watch him when he was exhausted. It was like he was unable to function when he was tired.

But speaking of being up late, it was far too early for him to be awake as well. Usually he woke up a little bit from now, but to travel all the way here? That involved a train ride and a bit of walking.

Needless to say, seeing his neighbor here was just… Weird. What was Ren doing all this way from home so late at night? He had work to get to in just a few hours.

He’d set a drink onto the counter though, and he was still fishing for a few bills from his pocket.

“Ren?” Ryuji asked, and the male in question finally glanced up at him. He seemed just as shocked as Ryuji was. His eyes were wide and his mouth hung open a bit. “What are _you_ doing here?”

But the shock didn’t seem to last for too long. Ren was smirking after that. But it was shaky. Strange. He seemed unconfident. Almost nervous even. In fact, the chuckle that he let fall from his lips after that seemed forced.

He looked like he was about to sweat bullets. But why?

It was as if he’d been caught by his mother with his hand in the cookie jar just a few minutes before dinner began. And that thought was concerning to Ryuji. Why _was_ he so nervous?

But Ryuji had to remember that this man was, very obviously, always hiding something from him.

The thought of one of those huge bullets piercing his head had Ryuji almost sweating bullets as well.

“Hey. Didn’t think I’d see you here. I had _business_ in the area.” Ren said. He’d finally managed to tug the money from his pocket though, and he tossed a couple of crumpled up dollars onto the counter. “Working hard, huh?” And then he chuckled again, though this one seemed more _real_. 

Well, Ryuji had never told him exactly where he worked. Maybe he was out getting something and had just unexpectedly run into Ryuji on the way home. Still, the fact that he was out at this late hour was concerning.

But _really_? Out getting something at _this_ hour?

He was carrying a paper bag though. Ryuji would have tried to take a small peek inside had it not had the top of it rolled down. It looked like Ryuji couldn’t be a snoop tonight. As curious as he was about why Ren was so far from home and buying something at _two in the morning_. That wasn’t something that he was going to get over easily. 

“Huh? Yeah!” Ryuji said, picking up the bottle of soda and quickly dragging it in front of the scanner. The computer beeped to show that it had been successful, and then Ryuji turned to the computer. After pressing a few buttons on the computer and adding in his employee code, a discount appeared on the screen and subtracted a few cents-- soda wasn’t expensive after all, from the total. 

Ren looked at the screen with a raised eyebrow and then to Ryuji almost questioningly.

Taking the money from the counter, Ryuji punched the total into the computer, and the drawer popped open afterwards. “Employee discount.” He said with a wink. He could help out a friend, right? Although Ren seemed pretty confused by the simple gesture. Ryuji didn’t think it would be a bad thing.

And with that, the change was handed back to Ren. The black haired male took it graciously and then slipped the coins into his pocket. He was smiling now though. Perhaps the shock of running into someone like this was wearing off. It was a pretty small chance that he’d run into anyone he knew out of the blue like this-- much less it be Ryuji.

“Thanks.” Ren didn’t take his drink yet though. It wasn’t like anyone was rushing him out. The store was empty save for the two of them and the manager in the back. If Ren had time to waste before work, it’d be nice to stand around and talk for a bit. “Sorry. I didn’t think you worked _here_.”

Waving off the comment, Ryuji reached down and grabbed a plastic bag from beneath the counter. “Nah, it’s okay!” Ren was probably talking about his initial shock, huh? Ryuji leaned forward onto the counter, crossing his arms against the clear glass above the scratch-off tickets. “Anything for a friend! You know?”

And they were friends, right? Ren was a cool guy. Mysterious. Scary. But cool. He hadn’t made a move to hurt Ryuji yet, so the blonde chose not to worry about it. Not for now.

But there was always the possibility of him turning against Ryuji in the future.

Ryuji chose not to worry about that now either.

Ren picked up his soda after that, twisting the cap off and bringing it to his lips. “No bag.” He muttered before he took the sip. There was a small smile on his face as he drank though, his eyes not leaving Ryuji. 

Ryuji felt as though the gaze was a little strange. It was a bit harsh for Ren to be staring at him so intently like he was. It was almost as if he was analyzing Ryuji in a way.

Demeanor cracking under his gaze if only slightly, Ryuji took the plastic bag he’d placed there and then brought it down under the counter once again-- loosely hanging it from the hooks where it originally lay. 

But something caught Ryuji’s attention when Ren went to close the bottle of soda. Something small and slightly purple sat on his collarbone, and it peeked out just beneath the collar of his shirt. It was round and looked a bit irritated. If Ryuji didn’t know any better, he would have guessed it to be a hickey. Frowning, he stood upright.

Ren had a hickey? Did that mean he’d come to this side of town for a certain reason? Did he have a girlfriend? Or maybe it was a boyfriend? Ren had made it pretty clear that he was interested in males and females, so Ryuji wouldn’t be surprised if it was a boy’s house he spent the night at. 

During the few nights they’d spent together at Ren’s house, his neighbor had been more open about himself and the type of people he was interested in. And Ryuji just so happened to _maybe_ admit that he wasn’t as straight as some people believed either.

Not that Ryuji was ashamed of it. He just never really threw out his sexuality in casual conversation unless it was brought up.

But that’s not to say that he was interested in a relationship with Ren. It wasn’t like they’d been hitting on each other or anything! But, well, sometimes you just liked the idea of sharing with your buddies.

But if Ren _did_ have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, why hadn’t he told Ryuji? It seemed like it would be something that he would have shared about himself. Something about an excitement that came with a new partner-- like you wanted to show them off.

Ren really did like hiding a lot of things from him though. It was… Concerning. To say the least. Even though he was open about some things, he kept other things well hidden. Ryuji couldn’t say that he enjoyed it at all. In fact, he hated it. He despised it. With how open he was with Ren, he hoped that Ren would be the same with him…

But then again, maybe it wasn’t a hickey. Maybe it was just a bruise. It sure did look like a legitimate hickey though. The placement was just… Not usually a place you would find yourself gaining a bruise unless it was from a pair of lips pressed against your skin.

And if Ren did have a hickey, then that meant he’d probably just come from… Well, someone else’s house. And if he didn’t have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, then maybe it was a one night stand?

He was so casual about everything, wasn’t he? Ryuji wasn’t going to ask about the mark on his skin, but something about it made Ryuji’s chest ache a little bit. 

He had no idea why.

But it was almost painful to look at a mark like that on Ren’s skin. Shaking his head a little, the blonde just forced a smile back onto his lips.

Maybe he was just jealous that Ren had someone to spend the night with. Ryuji had been feeling a bit… Lonely. A _lot_ lonely. It had been so long not only since he’d gotten laid, but since he’d just been able to share his bed with anyone. He missed cuddles, dammit.

“Well,” he said as he looked back up to Ren’s face, only to see his neighbor blinking in confusion. “I should get back to work. Got a lot to do before I can head out.”

He didn’t want his chest to ache more, and looking at Ren was really just… Making him jealous. Ugh. He hated feeling jealous. But whoever was with Ren was lucky. Really.

Wait.

_No_.

_Ren_ was lucky. _Ren_ was the one who got to have a night of fun.

_He_ was lucky.

Ren did smile after that though, picking up the paper bag he’d placed on the counter and tucking it under his arm.

“Yeah. Sorry to bother you.” 

He picked up his soda after that, holding it by the top at his side. 

“Not at all!” Ryuji found himself waving his hand in the air. “It was cool to see you! I, uh… See you later! At home!” They had planned to hang out a little bit. Ren offered to bring something by for them to eat so Ryuji could relax his leg as much as he could.

But Ren seemed to pick up on that, frowning. “Oh. Before I go; how is your leg?” For someone Ryuji thought he had reason to be nervous around, he did often seem concerned about the blonde’s health.

“Huh? Oh!” Ryuji pat his leg even though he was sure Ren couldn’t see it around at the other side of the counter. “It’s fine! Ankle hurts, but I’m trying to be careful!”

And Ren smiled at that. It was rather large and genuine, and he nodded after that. “Good. Well, I’ll see you later!”

Seeming as lively as he had all night, the black-haired male left the store. Ryuji had never really seen him as calm as he had been when he’d come into the store. Then again, Ren was always pretty cheerful and expressive when he was around.

Ryuji did have to remember that it was not his usual time to be awake though. And though he only seemed a little tired, he could have been exhausted. Ren didn’t cope well when he was tired. Ryuji had learned that much about him. 

“Get home safe! You’re a _long_ way away!” Or at least a half an hour of train time and walking. It would have been nice to work at one of the stores closer to home.

Ren frowned after that though, and he extended his arm to look at the watch on his wrist. “Oh. Yeah. I do.” And then he smiled, using the hand with the soda in it to give Ryuji a half-wave. “You be safe too!”

And with that, he was gone. Boy, that was weird. The fact that someone like Ren was so far out from home on a morning right before work? There was no way around it. Ren was heading home after getting laid.

Lucky him, right?

Ryuji just scoffed a bit as he wandered out from behind the counter and made his way back to the chip aisle. 

At least he had fun, right? Probably.

Ryuji wanted to be happy for him.

But whatever was in the paper bag was concerning. It was bigger than a lunch bag, but it had no indication that it was from a grocery store. It was weird. And the top was rolled down and everything…

Maybe it was some booze or something. But what liquor store was even open this late?

And did Ren even drink?

Choosing to just focus on finishing his work so that he could head home for the day, Ryuji kneeled down behind the box he’d been working on before. Picking up various bags from in the box, he stuffed them onto the shelf. And once it was filled, the box was returned to the back room where it should have been. The chips were usually kept on high up shelves, but… With his ankle, Ryuji wasn’t planning on risking his neck on a ladder.

He stopped by the manager’s office to let his boss know that the boxes had to go back, promptly interrupted a phone call with who the blonde presumed was his wife, and was quickly shooed out of the room after. He didn’t seem happy either. Maybe Ryuji had caught him in the middle of an argument or something.

Well, that wasn’t really something you were supposed to bring to work with you anyway. You were here to work, not distract yourself with home life.

But Ryuji was really one to talk, huh?

He’d just gotten distracted by Ren just a few minutes earlier.

Oh well. Right now, Ryuji just willed the time to run faster so that he could get home sooner. His ankle was not happy.

He filled a mop bucket and then brought it out ot the front room, as well as a few wet floor signs. That was the last big job he had to do before counting the money in his register. And then home. 

He’d have to find something to do in his free time though. There was still a bit of time to go before he would be able to clock out.

The mop really was disgusting though. Covered in a bit of dirt itself, it really could use a good washing. That and the entire mop sink area. If he had a little bit of help, then he would have plenty of time to clean up a thing or two. But with only two people on duty, and one of them locking himself in the office, there was no way Ryuji would be able to leave the front long enough to accomplish anything in the back.

But the problem with mopping was that it was unbearably boring. Plus, there was the risk of slipping and hurting his ankle again. And he really didn’t want to end up being stuck on the couch again. It really sucked. Even getting to the bathroom was a pain in the ass.

But after most of the floor was mopped, Ryuji placed down the signs and then got to the only thing he really could do-- Organizing.

Customers rarely wandered into the store at strange hours of the night. He had some time to himself.

And once that time was up, Ryuji slipped his coat onto his shoulders. The person who was his relief had finally arrived, and it was Ryuji’s time to head home for the day.

It didn’t help that his coworker had been late though, and Ryuji didn’t find himself leaving the store until almost twenty minutes after his shift was supposed to end. He couldn’t just leave the manager there alone though.

Slipping out onto the cold streets, Ryuji heaved a sigh. His breath came in cloudy puffs from his lips, and he pulled the hood of his jacket up and over his head before stuffing his hands in his pockets. It had been a long and boring night, as usual, and the only excitement the blonde really had for the night had been when Ren showed up. 

Hell, it was probably the most fun he’d ever had at work, and it’d only been a little bit of friendly conversation. But Ren _was_ his friend. And as little as Ryuji liked that he’d shown up with something akin to a hickey on his neck, he still found it nice to have a conversation that wasn’t just a few lifeless words about someone’s day.

It was really cold at the moment though-- much like it always was at three-thirty in the morning in the middle of winter. Ryuji’s ankle hurt even more outside as he was walking, and he made sure to keep his gaze on the ground so that he knew he wouldn’t be slipping on any ice. The sidewalk seemed relatively safe, but any questionable areas were thoroughly avoided. He couldn’t afford any medical bills, and he really didn’t want to force Ren to make another deal with a doctor for another housecall.

Whatever that deal had been.

The train station wasn’t that much further though, and Ryuji knew he would sit on the train and listen to a little bit of music to pass the time. And knowing he had some curry from Leblanc waiting for him at home was enough to get him excited. He’d been waiting all night to not have to work, but curry was a great plus.

Getting to his place was bound to be torture though. 

His body stiffening against the cold air, Ryuji just huffed a little bit. His nose was cold. He wished he had a scarf. And some gloves. His nose was starting to hurt, and his fingers were beginning to feel numb.

And that’s when the sound of a crash came from the alley just ahead of Ryuji could be heard.

Frowning, Ryuji stopped. It sounded like something was being thrown against a trash can. Maybe a stray cat was rooting through some of them? But it sure sounded pretty violent for just a trash can being tipped over.

And not to mention there were voices coming from the alley as well. People? They sounded angry.

Taking a few steps forward, Ryuji peered down the alley. There was a light farther down in the alley, so he could make out the silhouettes of three-- no, _four_ people.

Squinting though, something seemed… _off_. The three people were facing against the fourth. Their fists were clenched, and Ryuji could hear one of them yelling at whoever stood before them.

Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji briefly wondered why he was watching this. It was just a few people caught in an argument, so why was it any of his business? They’d finish their fighting and they’ move on. Just like everyone else.

But then one of the silhouettes threw a punch. It went right to the gut of the fourth member. A grunt, and the male (Ryuji assumed from the shape of the person) stumbled back against the brick wall of the building his back was facing. 

This wasn’t just an argument. This was a _mugging_.

And that poor guy needed help.

Turning to one of the men behind him, who Ryuji assumed was the leader of the group grabbed something from his hands and then threw it at the defenseless male. It hit him in the chest, and group of three turned and began running down the opposite end of the alley just as the victim’s legs seemed to give out from under him. He slid to the ground.

“H-hey!” Ryuji called as he pulled his hands from his pockets. He ran down the alley as fast as he could-- the adrenaline that ran through his veins easing the pain in his ankle a little bit.

It was no use though-- he determined as the group continued to run. He made it a few feet past the stranger on the ground before he stopped running, huffing as he tried to catch his breath. Well, they weren’t going to stop. But someone had to take care of the guy on the ground. 

Turning without a second thought, Ryuji ran the few steps to the stranger and kneeled down.

“Hey!” He said, one hand cupping the male’s face as the other held onto his shoulder. “You okay?”

The male didn’t respond. Instead, his head lolled to the side slightly and against the palm of Ryuji’s hand. Even in the darkness Ryuji could see that the male appeared weak. Poor thing.

“Hey, come on!” Ryuji insisted, patting the side of the male’s cheek a couple of times. “Say something!”

He hoped that he wouldn’t have to call an ambulance for this guy. Ryuji wasn’t sure he’d be able to carry him all the way to a hospital, but he looked like he was in shit shape. And hearing a groan from the male’s throat wasn’t helping. 

Shit. He needed help.

Okay, maybe it was in his best interest to call an ambulance. 

“It’s okay!” Ryuji said, standing upright. He made sure that the other male wasn’t going to fall over before he reached into his pocket. “I need to go see the street name. I’ll call an ambulance.”

He had to run to the end of the street to see what the name of it was. He was too nervous to move the male on his own. What if he ended up hurting him more? It was best to let the professionals take care of it. And not to mention Ryuji’s own ankle…

“No!” The stranger’s voice startled him, but even more so did the hand on his wrist. How had the stranger gotten to his feet so fast? In his weakened state, he was putting a lot of weight onto the blonde, free hand reaching out to brace himself against the dumpster at his side. “Please. Don’t…”

But something about that voice… It was so familiar… 

And from him standing, Ryuji was finally able to get a look the stranger’s face. The light from the end of the alley was shining just enough for the blonde to see a face so familiar that it hurt. That pointed nose and strong jaw... Those cat-like eyes… Sans glasses and bruised, and with blood dripping from his lips…

“Ren?”


	15. The Travel Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

There was no mistaking it. That was Ren. Even in the dim street lights Ryuji could tell. He knew his best friend’s face anywhere.

“Shit! Come on!” Ryuji said, turning enough so that he could just lean down and hold onto his neighbor by the elbows. “We need to get you some help!”

There was no way he could just leave Ren battered on the sidewalk. Ryuji wasn’t sure where it was, but there had to be a hospital close by. Adrenaline was still coursing through his veins, so he was sure he could manage at least a few blocks helping Ren.

“No.” Ren’s voice was firm. It was clear that he didn’t want to get any help, but why? He was kneeling on the ground. He was beaten and bloody. Why didn’t he want to fix that? He was clearly in pain…

“Ren, come on. We can’t fool around.”

“I’m not fooling around.”

And though his words were probably a huge lie, Ryuji couldn’t help but want to just comply with what Ren’s wishes were. Ryuji wanted him to get help. He wanted to _help_ him get help.

But this was Ren’s body. He really needed to decide what was best for himself. And who was Ryuji to tell him what was best to do for himself? It wasn’t like they were dating or married or anything. Whatever he said, despite it seeming rather unfair, Ren didn’t _have_ to listen to his advice.

But that didn’t mean he couldn’t _try_.

“Ren, you look terrible.”

Ren seemed to take that as his cue to get off the ground. Grabbing nto Ryuji’s arms and using him as a crutch to help stand, Ren put quite a bit of his weight on the blonde. Ryuji didn’t mind, instead bracing himself as well as he could to help his friend to his feet, and then stood up himself. 

“It looks worse than it feels.”

How the hell did he know? He hadn’t been able to look in a mirror or anything, had he? Ren’s words made Ryuji feel sick.

“You don’t know shit.”

And that actually got Ren to laugh. Really? In his _current_ state he was still even to laugh? What a weird guy. Ryuji never thought he would be able to understand how this guy worked. Ren was just something he never thought anyone would understand.

“Sorry.” But what did Ren have to be sorry for?

Moving his hand to his face, Ren looked like he was trying to adjust the glasses on top of his face, but they’d long been knocked to the ground. His face was barren, and Ryuji wondered if it was just a force of habit at this point. 

But didn’t he realize that he couldn’t _see_? Maybe he could reason it was something about shock.

“Hey…” Ren was frowning again, but he wasn’t leaning on Ryuji as much anymore. He did, however, hold his stomach. Perhaps that was where the brunt of the attacking happened. 

In the light from the nearest streetlamp, Ryuji could see that his cheek was starting to swell though, and it had the blonde frowning.

“Can we… Just get home?” Ren was leaning over slightly, and he, for once, appeared shorter than Ryuji. 

Slipping the sleeve of his jacket over his fingers, Ryuji was gentle in wiping a bit of blood from Ren’s mouth.

“Yeah. Don’t worry. I’ll take you home.” If that was what would make Ren comfortable, then that’s what Ryuji would do. Like he noted earlier, he really couldn’t force Ren to do what he wanted him to.

“Thanks. Sorry.”

“There’s nothing to be sorry for, man…”

And really, there wasn’t. Ren couldn’t help it if he’d gotten mugged. It wasn’t his fault. He didn’t ask for it. 

Maybe a night at home and in bed would make him feel better about himself.

But then Ren looked to the ground. Glancing around, it was clear that he was searching for something in particular. What, Ryuji wasn’t sure. But Ren was holding onto the blonde’s arms as he glanced around, body swaying slightly. It seemed like he was a bit out of sorts, and Ryuji nearly questioned what he could do to help look when Ren finally spoke again.

“My glasses…”

Oh, right. He couldn’t even see to spot his glasses on the ground, could he? Frowning, Ryuji glanced around as well. He finally spotted them near some tipped over trash cans, and Ryuji let go of his neighbor to move to the side so that he could pick them up.

Wrapping his fingers around one of the arms, Ryuji picked them up off the ground and used his shirt to wipe off the lenses. They were dirty, and Ryuji didn’t want to just slip them onto Ren’s face covered in dirt and grime.

And only when he made his way back to his friend and slipped his glasses onto his face for him did Ryuji realize that the glasses were broken. Streaked across the center of the left lense was a huge crack. Ren was going to have to get them fixed, huh? That would probably be an expensive setback, but… Well, at least he could see for now.

“C-come on.” Ryuji insisted, doing his best to offer Ren a smile. “Let’s get you home.”

The subway was the cheapest option. It wasn’t his first choice, but Ren had insisted that it was the best one. A taxi would have been much more convenient but expensive, so Ryuji didn’t complain. If Ren wanted to sit on the train for a little longer, then that’s what they would do.

Getting Ren down the stairs of the station had been the difficult part, but as they sat underground on one of the benches waiting for the train, at least he could relax.

Ren wasn’t holding his stomach anymore. Maybe the pain had eased a bit. But in the light of the subway station Ryuji could see his injuries a bit better.

Ren was looking to the tracks ahead of them. His bottom lip was swollen and his left cheek was already starting to bruise. Ryuji could only imagine how bad the rest of his body looked if his face looked so tattered.

Ryuji found himself lost in thought as he was sitting back in his seat. Ren was leaning forward on his knees, but Ryuji was much more relaxed at the moment. It looked like his neighbor was thinking about something rather intensely. Poor guy. He really was in poor shape…

And then suddenly Ren spoke again.

“I’m sorry.” Why was he apologizing so much?

“For what?”

“The trouble I caused.”

_Really_? He was worried about the _trouble_ he caused? It wasn’t like he’d _asked_ for this mess. It wasn’t like he _wanted_ to get shit on by a bunch of thugs.

“Stop.” Ryuji found himself saying. Turning back to Ren once again, Ryuji used the sleeve of his jacket to wipe away the remaining residue of blood on the other male’s face. Ren winced under the pressure of his touch, but he didn’t pull away. He was probably sensitive.

“It’s _fine_.” Ryuji continued, then placing his hand atop Ren’s leg. He gave it a gentle squeeze, and Ren visibly relaxed under his touch. It seemed like he was scared. “You helped me, and now it’s my turn to help you. You’re my _best friend_ , dude. I got your back.”

It was true. After all of the things that Ren had done for Ryuji, the least he could do is haul his ass home after he’d gotten beaten up. It was a small price to pay. Ren was too selfless for his own good. Apologizing wasn’t going to make Ryuji feel any better about helping him.

What _would_ make him feel better was Ren healing. And not blaming himself for this mess.

Ren didn’t say anything after that. Perhaps he was considering Ryuji’s words. Good. That was what he should be doing. 

Not saying another word, Ren reached into the inside pocket of his jacket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes. He popped the box open and slipped one into his mouth before lighting it up after. Ryuji didn’t stop him.

Sure, it was probably super illegal to smoke on the platform. But who was around to care? It was close to four-thirty am. The only people in the area were a few staggering drunks. And they certainly didn’t seem to mind Ren’s behavior.

Draping his arm over the back of the bench, Ryuji rubbed on Ren’s back gently. If anything, it would (hopefully) ease his nerves a little bit. The guy still looked down. Ryuji didn’t blame him though. If he’d gotten mugged, then he’d be pretty upset too.

The blonde was thankful that he’d been there to find Ren though. If he hadn’t been passing by, then who knew what would have happened to him?

The train ride wasn’t too long. Ren wanted to sit in a space near the door. Ryuji couldn’t blame him for it. But he was strangely silent the whole time. And Ryuji couldn’t bring himself to say anything either.

And the walk from the station wasn’t that long either. Thankfully. 

But they were at Ren’s door before Ryuji knew it. There were a thousand thoughts running through the blonde’s mind as they’d been traveling, but… Well, he was afraid to bring them up. He was terrified that he may say one thing that might set his neighbor off to exclude himself more than he already had.

Ren hid far too many things from Ryuji.

But the blonde _needed_ to know more. There was so much that he didn’t know. Ren knew so much about him, but he knew nothing about his neighbor. It was almost like Ren didn’t want him to know him in return.

The black haired male fiddled through the huge stack of keys that he held in an attempt to find the one to his apartment. His hands were shaking and his movements were staggered. Was he really fine?

“You okay?” Ryuji suddenly asked, reaching out and pressing a hand to his neighbor’s shoulder.

Ren jumped under his touch and Ryuji felt bad for startling him, but… Well, someone had to look out for Ren, right? Maybe he was just jumpy after his encounter. Poor thing.

“Yeah. Sorry.” Ren was still searching in vain for his keys, huh?

Ryuji was quiet for a little bit longer before he reached out and took the keys from his neighbor’s hands. The searching was driving him crazy. He just wanted to get his neighbor inside.

Flipping through the keys at a much faster pace, Ryuji spotted the one that he recognized as the key to his neighbor’s apartment-- one stamped with a cat pattern affectionately picked out from the hardware store, and then inserted it into the lock. 

He was quick to unlock the door, and he was about to push it open when Ren suddenly grabbed his wrist and effectively held the door closed with it.

“That’s fine. Thanks.”

Why was he acting so weird? Ryuji was just going to help him into bed…

“I’ll help you settle in.” Ryuji said, his voice feeling rather light. It was almost like his body was making the decision to seem calm and a bit perky in an attempt to try and make Ren feel a little bit better. Ryuji didn’t even have to make the decision for it.

“No. I’ll do it. Thanks.” Ren was speaking quickly. Far too quickly.

And then a thought hit Ryuji.

Ren was still hiding something from him.

“What’s your problem?” Ryuji asked before he could stop himself. His own words even shocked him.

Ren’s eyes were wide as he looked up at his neighbor. Apparently he hadn’t been expecting that kind of response either. 

But Ryuji decided to follow up with his words. He wasn’t going to just leave it half-assed like that. Commit, Ryuji. _Commit_.

“You’re always hiding shit from me!” Ryuji said, pulling his arm from Ren’s grasp. Crossing his arms over his chest. “We’re supposed to be _friends_! Hell, I lived with you for a while! What’s in there _now_ that you’re hiding from me?”

Ren said nothing. Instead he stood upright, gaze cast to the floor. He was ashamed. He looked like he was caught in his own lies, and honestly? He was. He couldn’t keep running from Ryuji like that. Ren was cornered. There was no escape.

“I’m sorry.”

But he was _still_ fucking trying.

And that only infuriated Ryuji more. 

“I thought we could share anything with each other! I’ve always been honest with you!” Ryuji said, arms falling to his sides. Why didn’t Ren trust him? Why was he always pushing Ryuji away?

Friends weren’t supposed to do that.

“We can.” Ren had found his voice, but it was quiet. It was as silent as a mouse. The shaky tone broke Ryuji’s heart.

“Then why won’t you talk to _me_?” Ryuji was pointing to his own chest after that.

And then Ren’s gaze met his own, and Ryuji felt more empty than before. Behind those glasses was the stare of a broken man. He was hurt and torn and stomped into the ground.

And it only took Ryuji a moment to understand exactly how he felt.

_Ren thought he was alone_.

Ryuji knew that look anywhere. Back when he still lived with his mother and his father. Back when he first broke his leg and when all of his classmates had turned against him. Back when he himself felt _alone_.

And for the first time in _years_ Ryuji realized that he wasn’t alone. Ren knew the feeling of loneliness just like he did.

Ren was breathing heavy, but he looked exhausted. Tattered. Scared. Under Ryuji’s gaze he crumpled, and his eyes begged Ryuji to say nothing more.

“I’m sorry.”

His constant apologizing had Ryuji furious and devastated. He hated hearing it.

But he didn’t press the issue of getting into his home anymore.

Reaching out, Ryuji just wrapped his arms around Ren in a tight embrace. He pulled his neighbor’s head to his shoulder and held him probably a little too tightly for his current condition. But Ren didn’t pull away.

“Don’t be sorry.” Ryuji’s voice was soft after that. 

Slowly, Ren’s arms curled around Ryuji’s waist, and the blonde sighed.

He saw so much of himself in Ren that it hurt. That broken spirit. Not knowing who to turn to because those closest to you might pull away. And Ryuji didn’t want Ren to think that they couldn’t be together for any reason. They were friends. _Best_ friends. Ren may not want to come out about it yet, and that was fine.

It wouldn’t stop Ryuji from snooping, but it _would_ stop him from asking. 

The weight that pressed against him from Ren was almost too much for his heart to bear. It hurt. He hated it.

“Forget it.” Ryuji said after that, his chin resting atop Ren’s shoulder. Ren seemed to melt in his arms a little bit, and Ryuji felt his fingers curling in the fabric of his coat after. And then Ryuji pulled away, pushing some of Ren’s hair from his face.

He offered him an empty, blank smile. 

“Get yourself to bed, okay? And text me when you wake up.”

Ren’s response was a simple nod, but he didn’t meet Ryuji’s eyes. 

Ryuji couldn’t help but feel terrible for scolding him earlier. Despite the fact that he was still grieving the idea that Ren would open up to him at all.

But right now Ren’s healing was more important that Ryuji knowing anything he didn’t have to about him.

It was painful. And it sucked. But with that, Ryuji turned on his heel and head for the elevator. If Ren wanted to be alone, then that was what he was going to get.

Ryuji couldn’t make him feel differently.


	16. Drinking

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is dedicated to my Coffee Bro because they encouraged me to write this even when I was feeling at my most lazy.

Ren didn’t text him. 

For the rest of the day they hadn’t talked. Ryuji wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to text his neighbor, or even to call him, but he had no idea how Ren was doing. Maybe he was just busy.

But it was a thought that plagued him for the rest of the day. 

How _was_ Ren doing? Was he sleeping? Resting? Maybe he was just trying to keep to himself for the night. 

Regardless, Ryuji found himself standing outside of his neighbor’s apartment door.

He stared at the dark wood of the door with a frown. Did Ren _want_ to see him? Did he want to see anyone? With how shit shape he’d been in before, maybe he just wanted to be by himself.

But Ryuji knew more than anyone. If left to one’s own thoughts, it could be dangerous. If they were in poor shape to begin with, the negative thoughts that came with one’s loneliness could really eat a man up inside.

That small, weak hug that Ren had given him earlier really had him concerned.

But he was also afraid. What would Ryuji see when (or _if_ ) Ren opened that door? Would he still look a mess? Probably. He’d been pretty bruised just by the time they’d gotten home.

Would he look greasy? Unkempt? Tattered?

Maybe he’d still be dressed from earlier.

Well, he’d never know unless he actually gathered up the courage to knock on the door. And trying to get to that level of courage was pretty difficult. 

Ryuji thought of himself as a courageous guy, but facing your friends when they were vulnerable just seemed almost too scary of a task to face. But Ren needed him. Ryuji _knew_ he needed him.

Taking a deep breath, Ryuji chose to not think about it further. He raised his hand and he knocked upon the door with as clear of a mind as he could.

And it was silent. Was Ren out of the house? Ryuji had thought that he’d like to stay at home after his experience. It was far too late for him to be working, unless he switched shifts with someone else. 

Ryuji assumed that he should spend the day at home though. Maybe take a bath. Read a book. Cuddle with Morgana. Drink some coffee. You know. The usual things Ren seemed to like to do.

Ryuji was really hoping he was staying at home.

Ren had been in bad shape. But he didn’t like just sitting around…

And then Ryuji’s mind wandered back to the thought of just what Ren was trying to hide from him earlier. Ren had been adamant about keeping Ryuji out of the apartment. Even in his injured stupor he was still trying to keep something from Ryuji.

Was he not _trustworthy_? He’d trusted a thousand of his secrets to Ren, but his neighbor was still so… _Secretive_. He didn’t share _anything_ about himself. And if he did, Ryuji usually had to pry to get to it.

It was too bad he went home before he could do any more snooping in his neighbor’s apartment-- as terrible as that sounded.

Ryuji contemplated turning tail and heading home. Ren wasn’t answering the door. Maybe he really wasn’t home. Or maybe he was just trying to relax. It was too bad. Ryuji was really worried.

Then again, he could have always just _texted_ him.

But before Ryuji could turn to leave, the door was suddenly opened. What had taken Ren so long?

Looking up after his gaze had previously fallen to the ground, Ryuji was met with a sorry sight before himself. Standing in the doorway was Ren. His left eye was a dark black and blue, his cheek matching in color as well. His glass lense on Ryuji’s right was still cracked (well, when would he have had the time to fix it anyway?), and there were various bruises lining the exposed skin of his neck and collar. 

But despite the shit way he looked, there was a smile on Ren’s face. He looked like he was in a lot of pain. How was he smiling?

“Ryu!”

Oh, so he was excited to see Ryuji.

Wait. _Excited_? Why?

“Hey, Ren.” Ryuji found himself smiling just a bit. He brought a hand from his pocket and waved it to his neighbor. “How’s it goin’?”

“Great!” It shouldn’t have been. Ren seemed pretty chipper, didn’t he?

Something seemed strange about him, and Ryuji wasn’t sure how to place it.

But before he could mention anything, Ren perked up slightly. He blinked, and then turned into his apartment, motioning for Ryuji to follow after him.

Come in!” He urged,turning to look behind himself if only to make sure Ryuji was following after.

Something was weird about this energetic side of Ren, but Ryuji couldn’t place exactly what it was. Oh well.

Slipping into the apartment, Ryuji closed the door behind himself and locked it-- much like usual. But he turned around just in time to spot Ren stumbling over the edge of the couch.

Now that was even more weird.

“H-hey! Be careful!” Ryuji insisted as he wandered further into the home. He sure did feel like a mother sometimes, but he never had to warn Ren about being too eager… 

And as soon as he stepped into the living room, Ryuji spotted exactly what was wrong with Ren. Multiple beer bottles were strewn across the coffee table in various states of array. Ren was drunk. And suddenly Ryuji was a thousand times more uncomfortable.

“Here!” Ren was to his side in an instant, an unopened bottle of beer in his hand. With his opposite hand he brought something to the top of the bottle and popped it open, and then Ryuji spotted what it was.

_The bullet from before_.

Feeling the color drain from his face, Ryuji watched as Ren shifted the bullet in his hand, the bottle cap had joined it as well, and Ryuji felt himself release a breath. Where he had just been wondering what he had that out for, now it was… Wait. The bullet was a _bottle opener_?

Things were moving a bit too fast for Ryuji’s liking. He barely had time to process the thoughts coming to mind when the (now opened) bottle of beer was shoved into his hands.

“Drink! We’ll have fun!”

Ren’s arms were in the air after that. He was excited. _Too_ excited.

But now that he knew that alcohol was involved, Ryuji felt sick. He was disgusted. He had no good memories of alcohol.

The earliest memories he had of his father were filled with drunken nights. Fighting. Violence. Pain. Crying. Ugh. Ryuji didn’t want to think about those nights. 

But they still plagued his nightmares. Remembering how he once had to protect his mother from his father’s dangerous hands. Trying to take the alcohol away. Breaking his leg.

He pressed a hand to his forehead, fingers pressing against his skin. Was he sweating? Since when? His heart was racing.

God, he hates alcohol. It brought nothing but bad memories to his mind. Every fiber of his being was telling him to turn heel and run. His apartment was safe. There was no beer there-- no drunken people there. 

Knowing that Ren’s ability to control himself had diminished was enough to make Ryuji want to flee. His stomach felt heavy. His throat was burning. He felt like he had to throw up.

“Ryuji?” Ren’s voice was small and almost fragile sounding. It was like he was afraid to speak. Was something wrong?

Pulling his hand form his face, Ryuji looked up to his friend. Ren was frowning, Morgana in his arms. When had he picked him up?

“You’re pale…”

Was he? If anything, he certainly didn’t realize just how cold he felt until that moment. Swallowing the lump in his throat, Ryuji just shook his head.

“I… I’m fine.” He wasn’t. He wasn’t _fine_ in the slightest. He wanted to run.

Ren looked to be contemplating something for a moment. But _what_? The look on his face was of nothing short of confusion. Was he thinking too hard? Certainly that couldn’t be good for him. Not in his current state of mind.

“Oh!” He was smiling again after that, but it was soft. He held up his cat, shoving the poor feline towards Ryuji. Morgana didn’t seem happy in the slightest. “Hug Morgana! You look sad. Morgana makes me feel better when I’m sad.”

Well, that was… Not something Ryuji was used to. Kindness from someone who was drunk? Unlikely.

But, even sober, Ren was still a good guy… 

He was sweet, caring, selfless… Well, when he wasn’t hiding something. Perhaps Ryuji could find something out while Ren wasn’t so… Conscious. If he was more open while he was drunk, as people tended to be, maybe Ryuji could learn a bit more about him. It would help with the fact that Ren liked to try and hide a lot of things from him…

But that didn’t mean he was comfortable. In the slightest. He still wanted to go home. 

He did take Morgana though, passing the beer that was given to him over to Ren so he could properly take the cat. He calmed a bit in Ryuji’s arms- no longer struggling against his captor. Maybe he didn’t like Ren so much when he was drunk either. At least they could agree on that.

“This is yours!” Ren said after that, motioning to the beer bottle. 

“Er, no thanks.” Against his better judgement, Ryuji brushed past Ren and made his way over to the couch. He sat down on it, letting Morgana hop off of his lap afterwards. If the cat didn’t want to be contained, then Ryuji wasn’t going to force him. Ren was right though. A little cat hugging did help slightly. It was like Ryuji had a bit of support, and wasn’t alone in this situation.

He didn’t bother looking at Ren after that. He wasn’t sure what to expect from a statement like that. But it wasn’t like everyone liked to drink, right? In fact, until now, Ryuji had no idea that Ren even liked to drink. That brought more questions to mind, and it bought a hell of a lot more concerns with it. Would he have to worry about stuff like this in the future?

And then he felt the back of the couch cave in slightly. Turning to the side a little, he saw Ren leaning on the back of the couch, arms folded over it as he held the beer bottle in one still, gently. 

There was a frown on his face as he looked down at Ryuji, his head tilting slightly. “What’s wrong, Ryuji? Did I say something wrong?”

Frowning, Ryuji’s shoulders fell slightly. Weird. Ren was concerned about his feelings. It wasn’t unusual for the black-haired male to be, but something felt wrong about this.

“Oh, uh… No. Not at all. I just don’t drink.” As well as he didn’t like hanging out with drunk people. 

“Oh!” Ren seemed satisfied with that answer, and he raised the bottle to his lips to take a drink. Ugh. He smelled like booze. The closer he got, the more Ryuji wanted to just leave.

And he was about to, until Ren wandered around the side of the couch and sat down beside him. They were close-- probably a little too close, but Ren’s better judgement had been clouded. 

It was quiet for a moment before Ren turned on the couch. He rested his elbow up on the back of the couch and put his free hand on Ryuji’s thigh. He was close. Too close. Ryuji wanted to run.

“You know,” he began before he took an awkward sip from the bottle in his hand, knocking it against the side of Ryuji’s head for a moment. Jeez. “I had a rough day, Ryuji.”

Ren’s breath stank. It smelled like the cheap beer he held in his hand, and vaguely like he hadn’t brushed his teeth all day.

Maybe that was just because of the beer though.

“Uh, yeah. I know.” Perhaps he was seeming short with Ren, but his patience was being severely tested at the moment. His heart was racing. He really just wanted to be anywhere but _here_. But he couldn’t just… Leave.

“I thought you would text me. You didn’t.” This was like deja vu. Ren seemed upset when Ryuji hadn’t visited him back when they;d first met as well.

Sighing, Ryuji rubbed at his forehead a little bit. Ren’s hand curled in the fabric of his jeans. He really needed to back off a bit. “I told _you_ to text me.”

Ren didn’t seem to like that answer. And neither did Ryuji, because it just made Ren lean closer to him. Laying his head on his arm, Ren’s hair brushed against Ryuji’s cheek, and he sighed a little bit. “You helped me out a lot today, Ryuji.”

“I know.”

And then Ren’s hand wandered a little bit _too_ close. Rubbing at his inner thigh, Ryuji felt the breath catch in his throat. This was getting way too personal. “I want to give you something too.” What exactly was Ren getting at here?

Grabbing the black-haired male’s hand, Ryuji pushed it _far_ away from any sort of weird, _not so innocent_ contact with Ryuji’s leg.

As much as the idea of maybe getting laid was much appreciated, Ryuji _really_ didn’t want that soap opera romance with his neighbor. Nor did he want it with someone who was drunk.

He was glad Ren didn’t push his touching further. He really didn’t need to be repaid for just… Being a good friend. You know? If he expected sex from his actions (or something else. Who knew what Ren would really be getting at here), then he would just be a jerk. One of the biggest jerks. You shouldn’t need incentive to be nice to a friend…

Ren did pull away from him though, sitting forward on the couch now. He held the bottle between his legs, fingers drumming against the glass. He seemed upset for some reason. Maybe he really was upset that Ryuji turned down his advances. 

Still. Ryuji wasn’t looking for sex. _If_ that was what he had been getting at in the first place. It had been pretty obvious…

And Ryuji wasn’t completely oblivious.

But Ren had also never hid his sexuality from the blonde, so it really wasn’t farfetched. And he knew that Ryuji wasn’t exactly _straight_ either. It was probably a logical conclusion. But Ryuji wanted no part of it.

“Ryuji,” Ren really said his name a lot when he was drunk, didn’t he?

Looking over to Ren, Ryuji frowned. “Huh?” He did feel bad for having a short fuse with his neighbor at the moment, but Ren was really pushing his buttons.

“I’m sad.”

“No shit.” Whoops. That wasn’t really what Ryuji _wanted_ to say. But… Well, it got his point across. He supposed.

Ren didn’t seem affected by his words though.

“I try really hard, you know. I try really hard for you to look at me.” Huh? Ren was weird. Maybe this was just some sort of drunken mouth-vomit. He really wasn’t making any sense. Ryuji looked at him all the time. Where else was he supposed to look? The ground? “You’re _cool_ , Ryuji. I want you to think I’m cool too.”

_What_? 

_Ren_ thought _he_ was cool? Who the hell was he? No one _ever_ thought that _Ryuji Sakamoto_ was _cool_.

No one.

Well, except for his mother. 

But Ryuji didn’t know what to say. How could someone as mysterious, handsome, _cool_ as Ren think that… _He_ was cool? What was even _cool_ about him? He was awkward, easy to anger, boring… There was nothing cool about Ryuji Sakamoto.

But _Ren_ saw something…

Swallowing, Ryuji just looked away. How was he supposed to take this?

But it seemed like Ren had plans already.

“It’s late.” He muttered. His voice was small and quiet once more. But he chugged a little bit more beer before he placed the bottle on top of the coffee table to join the others. “I want to go to bed.”

Oh. Maybe that was a good idea. It was probably the _best_ idea. 

Ren stood after that though, and suddenly Ryuji could feel cold hands against his own, lifting them from his lap and into the air. Looking to Ren only showed that he was smiling. His hands were wrapped around Ryuji’s softly, and he was gently tugging the blonde to his feet. Ryuji complied, of course. He was ready to head home.

But, as usual, Ren always had to surprise him, huh?

“You’ll sleep too, right? Here.”

In the apartment? Ryuji frowned.

But then he spotted Ren pointing to the bed.

_Oh no_.

“Ryuji, I want you to sleep with me!” 

Ryuji’s face burned a bright red. He was being much more forward than he had been earlier. If he wasn’t fully honest about wanting sex before, he sure was now…

“You’ll sleep over, right? We can share the bed!”

Well, that thought was dashed. And fast. Thank god. Ryuji had no idea how he was going to get out of that mess. He’d already said no, after all. But Ren gave him no time to answer. Tugging him towards the bed, Ren rolled back onto his back on the mattress. Thankfully he’d let go of Ryuji’s hands though.

But, despite his mind telling him to just go home, Ryuji really thought that… Maybe staying over wouldn’t be a bad idea. Who was he kidding? This was a mess. It was the worst.

But he still sighed, and slipped the sweatshirt from his shoulders. Curse him for being so sympathetic. And curse Ren for…. Being lonely. Knowing that feeling just… Made Ryuji not want to leave all the more.

He slipped into the bed without another word, slipping under the blankets. Maybe later he’d sneak home.

But Ren seemed so excited when he was joined in the bed. Crawling under the blankets as well, Ren was between Ryuji’s arms in an instant-- face pressed to the blonde’s chest. 

Ryuji could feel his face heating up once more, but he just let his head fall back onto the pillow with a sigh. 

Hopefully it would be an easy night.

He couldn’t, however, ignore just how nicely it felt to have someone in his arms again. And knowing that it was Ren _might_ have made it just a _little_ more enjoyable.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised you I'd dedicate it to you, you lameo.


	17. Fallen Leaves

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is so late! Enjoy!

The morning after was likely to be a long one.

Ren woke up before Ryuji even dared stir from his sleep. The blonde woke up to the smell off coffee.

Rolling over in the bed, Ryuji let out a groan. He was tired, and he really wanted to go back to sleep, but it really was about time to get up. Ren didn’t even process in his mind as he woke up. The only thing he was thinking about was why his apartment smelled like coffee.

Only after his mind was able to pull itself together was he conscious of the thought that he wasn’t _home_. He’d never even made it there after Ren dragged him into the bed.

The faint sound of a lighter being struck could be heard in the distance, and soon after the smell of a cigarette filled the room.

And that was when Ryuji sat up. Bolting up in bed a little faster than he’d meant to, Ryuji held his head with one hand. The beer bottles that were on the coffee table had mysteriously disappeared-- probably to the garbage or elsewhere.

Sitting up so suddenly did have him slightly dizzy though, and Ryuji took a moment to blink before he gaze landed on Ren.

His neighbor sat upon the couch. He was cradling a mug in one hand-- presumably filled with coffee, and the opposite hand held the cigarette to his mouth. He drew a breath from the cigarette. Seeming sad and rather distant for himself, Ren didn’t say a word.

Getting out of the bed, Ryuji thought it best to maybe… Not seem like he was trying to hog his neighbor’s bed. It wasn’t really his place to be sleeping in it at all-- much less when Ren was sitting over on the couch. 

Making his way over to the couch, Ryuji was slow. Ren hadn’t mentioned noticing that he was up yet, but it was… Well, difficult not to notice. The room was small, and Ryuji had been moving around a lot. He didn’t make a lot of noise, but he did make some.

And Ren wasn’t deaf.

Slipping up behind the couch, Ryuji slipped his hands into his pockets with a frown. Why hadn’t Ren said anything? Then again, Ryuji hadn’t said anything either.

But after last night, when Ren so blatantly offered him sex, what was he supposed to say in response to it?

Did Ren even remember what had happened?

He was quiet-- not saying anything. Ryuji wasn’t sure how to break the ice.Frowning, he thought for a moment. What was there to say at a time like this? Well, if anything, Ryuji was sure he felt more awkward. He was the one that had to help Ren, after all.

Ren only had one thing to worry about. And if it was ruining their friendship, that certainly wasn’t it. He’d offered Ryuji sex, but it didn’t change anything. Ryuji didn’t feel any differently about him. He thought that maybe Ren was okay with _casual_ sex, but that wasn’t unusual. Or a bad thing. If that was what he liked to do, then fine.

Even though Ryuji thought of sex as more intimate himself.

It was strangely quiet though. Neither of them had said anything, but he was sure Ren knew that he was standing there. 

And then suddenly Ren moved. He took another drag from his cigarette and then let it out slowly. Turning his head only enough to get a small look at Ryuji, the blonde felt himself flinch back slightly. Ren seemed more distant than ever. The look on his face wasn’t _pleasant_. Not at all. 

“What did I say to you?”

Huh?

Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji reached up and rubbed at the back of his neck. How was he supposed to respond to that? Ren said a whole lot of _nothing_ the night before. He said a lot of things, but nothing really _relevant_. 

“I mean… Not a lot of things.” It was best to be honest, right?

And Ren turned away from him. Leaning back on the couch, he brought his cigarette to his lips once more.

“I find that hard to believe.” What had gotten into him? Ren had never been so serious with him before. Usually the black haired male was at least _pleasant_. But right now he seemed… Strange. Unlike himself.

But Ryuji did feel the need to prove his words. Carefully slipping around the sofa, Ryuji sat down next to Ren slowly. He sat against the back of the couch, arm draped over the back of it behind Ren. 

“Hey.” He said, then looking over to Ren. Shifting slightly, Ryuji felt that it would help the awkwardness. Or at least it gave him an excuse to pause. “You, uh…” How to word it… “You said you were ‘sad’ last night.” Ryuji was finally able to get it out then, huh? But he wasn’t sure where to take it from there. “Is there somethin’ you want to talk about?”

Ren never had been honest about why he was sad. Ryuji had always assumed that it’d been because of the mugging. But he could have been wrong. Ren had proven him wrong on multiple occasions already. 

“No.” It was a short answer. Probably the shortest one Ren could even give him. Ryuji had the faint idea that Ren was trying to hide him from something-- perhaps _protect_ him from something. He wanted to know what was going on, but…

He rubbed Ren’s back for a moment.

“Hey,” he began, leaning forward and offering his friend a smile. He was obviously upset about something. But friends helped each other when they weren’t feeling so hot, right? “You don’t _have_ to tell me, but I’m here if ya need someone. Best friends, right?”

But at least that got Ren to smile. It was small and it seemed like he didn’t feel a whole lot better. It was genuine though, and it made Ryuji smile a little bit wider.

“Yeah. Best friends.”

It seemed like Ren really responded well to that statement, huh? Good. Ryuji wanted him to feel a little bit better. Despite still looking pretty shitty.

But then Ren was frowning again. He looked down to his lap before pulling his mug to his lips and sipping at his coffee. And then he paused. “Do you-”

He was going to ask Ryuji if he wanted anything. The blonde knew it. Even in his upset state of mind he was going to try and take care of him. But today was Ren’s day. Ryuji was going to make that apparent from the very start.

“What do you usually do to cheer yourself up?” 

The question startled Ren into silence. His eyes were wide as he glanced to Ryuji, blinking in confusion. “Huh?”

“You heard me!” Ryuji removed his hand from the couch, instead leaning forward. He bent his elbows onto his knees, but he kept his gaze on his neighbor. “When you’re sad. Let’s do something you like to do!”

Unfortunately for Ryuji, that request got him into a big mess. It was so cold outside.

Shivering under his jacket, Ryuji sucked in a sharp breath. It was far too cold to take a walk. Walking. That was what Ren had requested that they do. And he really _enjoyed_ that? In _this_ weather?

Well, whatever made him happy…

“Are you sure you don’t want to go home?” Ren’s voice was still small, though he seemed to be talking more loudly now. Thankfully too because the streets of New York City were _loud_.

“I’m sure!” Ryuji’s voice was pretty high pitched for his liking. But he wasn’t focused on that. Instead he was trying to focus on not freezing to death at the moment. 

“It’s cold.”

Ryuji felt himself laugh at that, though it was more of a body shutter than anything else. Still, it was a laugh-- a _forced_ laugh.

“Y-yeah! No kidding!”

Today was for Ren, after all. If he wanted to go out and take a walk in the worst weather imaginable, then that’s… What they would do. Despite Ryuji wanting to die at the moment. It was far too cold for this shit.

At least the park was close by to their apartments. Even if it was a good half-an-hour or so walk.

It was a good thing they were almost there. Maybe they could stop off in a cafe after walking around a little bit to warm up. Ryuji could really go for a hot chocolate right now.

He heard Ren chuckle beside himself. Well, at least he was cheering up a little bit.

“We won’t stay long.” Ren stopped just before the edge of the park though, looking in at the barren trees and dark grass. He sighed, a frown on his face. Well, it seemed like he liked nature, but… Well, it was unfortunate that it was winter. There wasn’t really much to look at aside from some brown leaves.

Bur Ryuji reached out from his pocket, grabbing Ren by the arm. He tugged him towards the park and onto the sidewalk before them. Was that a little too forceful? Probably. But he wanted to get Ren inside so he could try and cheer up a little bit. 

“Come on! No use wasting time out here!”

Ren didn’t protest though. He simply allowed himself to be dragged along, and a peek back at him showed Ryuji that there was an amused smile on his face. Well, at least he wasn’t frowning any longer.

After they were a bit into the park though, Ryuji let go of his friend. There was no turning back now, right? They were too far-- a few meters, into the park for Ren to have second thoughts. Ryuji’s hands were freezing though. Maybe some gloves would be a good investment. He should have bought some ages ago though.

Their pace slowed a bit as they walked deeper into the park.

Despite the cold weather, it still seemed like there was… Quite a lot of people in the park. Some were playing with dogs and others were just strolling around. A lot of the people seemed like they may be busy, but most of them seemed to be enjoying the bit of scenery, as brown and dead as everything looked at the moment. It looked like it had snowed a little over the night though. There was a thin sheet of it covering some of the trees and some grass, but it seemed mostly melted by the early afternoon.

Ryuji’s nose burned at the touch of the chilly air and he sniffled when he felt his nose about to run. Ugh, the cold really was the worst.

But a glance to Ren had him smiling. Ren had his gaze ahead of himself, small smile on his lips. Though he could see the clear mark of a black eye under his neighbor’s glasses, Ren didn’t see ashamed of it. It would be a good idea for him to get new glasses soon though. Ryuji couldn’t imagine that the crack in front of his eye was anything short of annoying.

But then, suddenly, Ren frowned. He stopped in his tracks, and it caused Ryuji to stop as well. What was wrong? Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji opened his mouth to ask Ren about his behavior when he spotted his neighbor raising a hand. He waved it in the air a little bit, smile spreading across his face.

“Yusuke!”

Huh? Did he see someone he knew?

Glancing in the general direction that Ren looked, Ryuji spotted a male with dark navy hair-- much like Yuuki’s, sitting on a bench. He had a sketchbook in hand, pencil scribbling across one of the pages. But at the sound of his name, the male looked up with wide eyes.

Standing from his spot on the bench, the male closed his sketchbook. Oh, so Ren had another friend? They certainly ran into a lot of his friends, huh? Or maybe he just had way too many of them. Either way, Ren was a popular guy.

The other male wandered closer to them, though his focus seemed solely on Ren. Well, it was logical. They were friends.

“Hello, Ren.” He called. His voice was smooth, and perhaps a bit more posh than Ryuji would have guessed. Then again, he was dressed well. But, without gloves, wasn’t he freezing drawing in the park like this? Hell, that was some sort of commitment.

Ren’s smile was wide as he looked to his friend, but suddenly the blue haired male stopped. A very audible, very _offended_ gasp escaped his mouth. It was the most offended gasp Ryuji was sure he’d ever heard. 

The sketchbook, along with the pencil that Yusuke carried fell to the ground with a clatter, and he was at Ren in an instant.

“What happened to your angelic face?!” He sounded downright insulted by the fact that Ren was injured. 

His hands were cupping Ren’s face tightly, turning his face to the side so that he could assess the damage. Hell, it was just a black eye. What was this guy so worried about? It’d heal in a few days.

“How _dare_ someone mar such beauty! This is a disgrace!” He let go of Ren’s face with one hand, fingers darting beneath glasses to touch the sensitive flesh sprouting Ren’s wound.

Ren flinched at the touch. “Yusuke, that hurts.”

“I could never hope so draw you in such a sorry state.” 

This was far too dramatic for Ryuji’s liking.

But then Ren’s hands grasped onto Yusuke’s and he pulled them from his face slightly, though still lingering in the air close by.

“It’s good to see you.” He said to the new member of their group. But Yusuke still didn’t seem amused in the slightest. 

Instead, he was still frowning rather sharply, his eyebrows furrowed into a scowl. 

“This is not a matter to make light of, Ren.”

But, as usual, Ren seemed to be avoiding talking about his own problems. “This is Ryuji. He’s a friend of mine.”

And, suddenly, the other male’s gaze was on him, and Ryuji felt himself shrink back a little bit. 

Like Ren, Yusuke was tall. He had a rather terrifying angry expression on his face, and… Much like all of Ren’s friend’s, he was _attractive_. Long eyelashes and a slightly upturned nose. Dark, mysterious eyes and a strong jaw… Did Ren only have beautiful friends? Why were they all so good looking?

Ryuji was jealous.

Yusuke’s judging eyes looked Ryuji up and down for a moment. And Ryuji felt even more insecure in his own skin. He felt so _exposed_ behind Yusuke’s eyes. He didn’t seem amused still, but then he turned back to Ren, fingers curling around Ryuji’s neighbor’s hands. 

“Yes, I remember you mentioned his palate contrasted yours well. I must disagree.” Ouch.

But then he pulled his hands from Ren’s, and turned to Ryuji. Oh no. So he was in the hot seat.

Grabbing Ryuji’s face with one hand, the blonde felt himself jump. He was easily startled by the sudden touching, and a gasp fell from his mouth before Yusuke turned his face to the side, looking over his features.

_Really_?

“Though, I will admit he has his perks.” Looking to Yusuke from the side, Ryuji spotted him smiling. “An angular nose, beautiful brown eyes. It’s a shame you didn’t bring him to me sooner.” He was looking at Ren again, and Ryuji heard his neighbor chuckle.

“Sorry. This was a chance meeting though.”

And then Yusuke hummed in response, looking back to Ryuji again. “Yes. I didn’t receive a message from you.” And then he let go of the blonde, his smile widening as he looked at him. 

Ryuji turned to look between Yusuke and Ren again, eyes darting between them before he spotted Yusuke turning and walking back to his discarded sketchbook. Deft fingers curled around the black covers and lifted the book into the air, and then he found the pencil and picked that up as well, tucking it into a pocket on the inside of his jacket immediately after.

“I would like curry. Shall we?” So he was assuming they were just going to join him like that? What was with this guy? He was stranger than Ren. If that were even possible.

But a trip to Leblanc meant a shit ton more walking before they were able to get into someplace warm. Ryuji felt himself let out a groan as he tugged the hood of his jacket over his head.


	18. The Meeting Spot

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who had to get a new computer because of issues with her other one! I love it though! It's super cool-- touch screen, has Windows Ink, can be used as a tablet... And it's the first laptop I've bought for myself without help! Gotta learn how to be an adult somehow, right?
> 
> Enjoy!

The trip to Leblanc was long, as expected. They’d just made it all the way to Central park, and then had to walk away and back past their apartments just to get there. Ren and Yusuke didn’t seem to mind though. They were walking ahead of Ryuji and they were chatting pretty friendly.

All while Ryuji froze to death behind them.

But Yusuke seemed to have cheered up Ren just fine. So it would be fine if Ryuji dipped off back home, right?

_But curry_.

Relaxing when they’d finally made it into the cafe, Ryuji felt himself shivering in the doorway. Ren and Yusuke were still talking while they shrugged off their own coats, and Boss’ voice could be heard greeting them both in the distance. However, things seemed a little louder than usual in the cafe.

There was a bit of talking in the background. That was strange. Usually Leblanc was pretty quiet. Glancing to the table beside himself, Ryuji noticed that there was a couple sitting there. Oh. So it was a busy day, huh? That was good. More money for Boss’ pockets, right?

But that also meant more work. Maybe now that Ren was here, he’d help out a little bit. It would probably be the _right_ thing to do. But it was Ren’s day off. If he wanted to relax, Ryuji was sure Boss would understand.

But, with how close they seemed, maybe Ren would help out anyway. 

And speaking of the black haired male, Ryuji glanced in front of himself once more-- just in time to be grabbed by the arm by his neighbor. Blinking, he noticed that Ren was waving as he tugged Ryuji in the direction of the back of the cafe.

Strange. Did he know someone here? Aside from Boss, that was.

Ryuji allowed himself to be dragged through the cafe, only muttering a small apology when he accidentally bumped into someone at the counter. Eventually Ren let go of his sleeve though, and it gave the blonde ample time to turn to the counter and greet Sojiro.

“Hey, Boss!” He said, reaching out and placing his hands on top of the bar. “Busy today, huh?”

Sojiro looked up from his hands where he had been polishing a glass, glancing over the rim of his glasses at the blonde. “Yeah. I’m not sure why.” He placed the glass, along with the towel he was using to polish it with, to the counter, and then put his hands on his hips. “They came out of nowhere…” He seemed exasperated, but Ryuji found himself chuckling at the older male’s words.

“It’s good for business though, right?”

And with that Sojiro sighed, fixing the glasses higher up on his nose. “I _guess_.” He muttered. “It keeps me moving around a lot.”

Ryuji’s smile grew larger after that, and he leaned on the counter more, elbows pressing to the wood. “Great! More people should get to taste your curry!”

Boss didn’t seem impressed though, and Ryuji’s smile faded slightly. He felt bad for the old man. He was just trying to enjoy his retirement, after all. But here he was, stuck in a cafe and serving guests. 

But, along with more work, it _was_ more money. Maybe he could hire someone else to help out too. Ryuji was sure it’d take a load off the poor guy.

He blinked though when he heard Ren call his name, and then he stood upright. Giving Sojiro a small wave, Ryuji turned to look back at his neighbor. So he did seem to find some friends here, huh? Yusuke had already made himself comfortable in the booth next to a female with vibrant orange hair. On the opposite side of the booth sat another female-- though she had short brown hair, and Ren was motioning for Ryuji to sit down beside her.

Both of the females were smiling at Ryuji, and the one with the bright hair waved at him.

“Yo! Name’s Futaba!” Her voice was pretty high. She seemed young too. And really short. Poor thing was practically getting eaten by the table due to it’s height. 

And then the brunette spoke next. “Hello! I’m Makoto.” She sounded a lot more calm than the first girl. But first impressions? They seemed like a nice pair.

“Ah, hey. I’m Ryuji!” Ryuji greeted as he slipped into the booth beside Makoto, one palm pressed to the tabletop while the other held the back of the seat. 

“Oh? You’re Ren’s neighbor then. I was wondering when we would meet you.” Makoto said as she reached out, picking up a mug of, what Ryuji assumed was, coffee. She brought it to her lips and she took a sip of it.

“Huh?”

“Yeah! He talks about you a lot!” Futaba chimned in. She was leaning over the table, arms reaching out wide as she stretched, humming at the pleasant feeling.

“Uh, so I’ve heard.” Ryuji muttered as he pouted. Ren talked about him a lot, huh? Everyone always brought up that they’d heard about Ryuji. It was weird. How often did he really talk about him? If everyone knew the blonde by name, then it had to be often enough that they remembered him. Weird. He didn’t think he was that interesting of a person.

And then he thought back to when Ren had mentioned that he thought Ryuji was cool. Did he really think that? Ryuji was pretty lame, in his own eyes. _Ren_ was the cool one. He was tall, mysterious, handsome… 

_Handsome_.

Ryuji felt a small flush spread across his cheeks as he shifted in his seat, sinking down against the back of the booth a little bit. No. There would be no thinking about that right now.

Ren pulled a chair up from the bar and sat atop it. It was far too tall for the table, but there wasn’t much room in the booth unless three of them wanted to squish in. And Ryuji really didn’t want to smoosh Makoto into the seat uncomfortably. 

“It’s nice to finally meet you. Ren speaks so fondly of you that I’ve wondered how long he was going to keep you from us.” Makoto said after that. Right. So Ren talked about him. A lot. It was weird.

“Yeah! He said you helped him out big time!” Big time? For what? Ryuji really didn’t do much for Ren. But a quick look to the black haired male had Ren pointing to his eye. Oh, so it was about the mugging that happened.

Frowning, Ryuji slouched back in his seat, stuffing his hands into the pockets of his coat. “Yeah. I, uh, found him on my way home.”

“It’s a good thing you did.” And after that, Makoto frowned when she looked toRen. The poor guy looked a little sheepish, rocking back on his stool a little bit and avoiding eye contact with the female. It seemed like he knew a lecture was coming up, huh? “Ren gets himself into a _lot_ of trouble.”

Well, Makoto didn’t sound happy at all. But, if she was friends with Ren for a while, it was likely she knew more about him than Ryuji did. 

But hearing that he got into trouble often was concerning. Was Ren often beat up like this? Ryuji hoped not. He really didn’t like the idea of constantly having to drag his neighbor out from alleyways and all the way back to the apartment. It hadn’t been fun the first time, and Ryuji was sure it wouldn’t be fun at all.

Ryuji didn’t want a repeat of the experience. Or of Ren getting drunk again. It really wasn’t fun, as much as sleeping in bed with someone had been.

Yusuke, who had been quiet up until that point, turned to Ren as well. “He was like that back when we met as well. He hasn’t changed.”

Poor Ren still looked like he was trying to avoid the conversation. Ryuji actually felt bad for him. It was like he was being attacked at the moment by his group of friends. Ryuji was sure it was out of care, but it would have been nice for them to lay off him for a little bit.

“Oh, he’s not that bad.” Ryuji couldn’t really talk. He’d only known him for a few months, after all. But it couldn’t be _too_ bad, right? Ryuji had only seen Ren beat up once so far, and they’d seen each other almost on a daily basis at times. Bruises took a while to heal too.

But Ryuji did feel bad for him. So, he turned to Ren with a smile, leaning forward onto the table and on his elbows.

“Hey, man!” He said, instantly drawing his neighbor’s attention. “How about a hot chocolate? You make it best!”

Ren sat upright on his stool after that with a nod. He looked like an excited puppy-- though he may have just been happy for an escape. But, regardless, he stood and made his way behind the counter. 

Then, turning back to the group, Ryuji smiled at them. He’d successfully saved Ren for now, huh? But the other three didn’t look upset. Instead, Yusuke raised an arm and requested a coffee from Ren as well. 

Resting his arm on the back of the booth behind Makoto, Ryuji sat back. It was bound for some nice relaxing time at Leblanc, right? It’d be nice to have some curry as well. Yusuke had mentioned that he wanted some earlier, and Ryuji and Ren hadn’t eaten yet. Or at least Ryuji didn’t _think_ Ren ate. Unless he had something before the blonde woke up.

Still, that had been a while ago. Maybe it was best to bring up the idea of food to the others.

“Hey! You guys hungry?” He asked the two girls. “Yusuke mentioned he was earlier. Curry sounds great on a cold day like this!”

“Oh!” Futaba’s eyes went wide, like she hadn’t thought of the idea herself. “That sounds great! Boss!” And then she was flagging down Sojiro’s attention. “I’m hungry! Feed me!”

She was a demanding little thing, huh?It was pretty funny.

But Ren seemed to mutter something to the owner of the cafe before he turned and head to the back room. It looked like he was planning on taking care of the order, huh?

But Ryuji heard Sojiro sigh, and the older male placed a hand on top of the bar, fingers tapping against the wood. “Be more polite, Futaba! There’s customers here…” Oh, so Futaba was going to end up the one being lectured, huh? That had Ryuji chuckling while the female let out a half-hearted whine.

But Ren was out from the back room in the blink of an eye, three bowls balanced on one arm while he carried a fourth. Wow. Ryuji had no idea he was a gifted waiter like that. Maybe he got the experience from serving his friends? Granted, he did have to hold one of the bowls pretty high up on his arm.

Still, it was impressive. Ryuji found himself blinking in surprise. Setting the first bowl down in front of Futaba, the next went to Yusuke. When Ren went to place one in front of Makoto though, the female held up a hand to try and stop him.

“No thank you. I need to be going soon. I have errands that need to be run.”

Ren seemed hurt by the words, but instead he placed the bowl in front of Ryuji, and the last bowl was set in front of his own spot. And from his pocket Ren produced four sets of silverware, placing them in a heap in the center of the table.

“Ah! You’re the best brother ever!” Futaba said as she grabbed one of rolls, tugging out a fork from the bound before starting to dig in right away. 

_Brother_? Like a _real_ brother? Ren had never mentioned having a sister. Well, he didn’t mention much about himself at all. But Futaba hadn’t been introduced as his sister either.

Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji looked to Ren, who just winked at him. “Our makeshift family. We’re not really related.”

“You both certainly act like siblings.” Yusuke muttered around bites of his food. With how elegant he appeared to present himself, Ryuji was shocked that he would eat so fast. He’d already made a pretty big dent in his serving. Wow. Ryuji didn’t think he’d ever seen anyone eat so quickly in his life. 

“Duh! He’s my honorary bro!” Futaba said, then stuffing some curry into her own mouth.

And then Makoto chimned in, looking to Ryuji. “Boss took him in while Ren was in high school. And he never really left.”

Took him in? For what? If Ren had been born in Japan, he obviously had to have made his way to the states at some point. But when Ryuji turned to ask, Ren appeared to have disappeared to behind the counter-- likely to finish making the drinks.

So, Ryuji did the next best thing. He turned to Makoto. “In high school? That’s young to move out on your own.”

“Yes.” The brunette said over the rim of her coffee mug. She took a small sip before she continued, small smile playing on her lips. “He was part of a foreign exchange program. We all figured he just enjoyed his time here so much that he didn’t want to live in Japan anymore. Though he went back for a little while, he’s done a lot of traveling in America in recent years.”

Oh, so Ren liked to travel. Ryuji wondered just how often he went out on trips. It must be nice. Ryuji was sure that he would never be able to afford to travel with his current paychecks.

He opened his mouth to respond, but the shattering of a glass caught everyone’s attention in the cafe. 

“What happened to your eye?!”

Everyone turned to look at Boss. Apparently he’d caught sight of Ren’s injury for the first time. Ren let out a nervous chuckle, and Ryuji spotted his eyes closing while he laughed. 

“It was an accident. I swear.” Accident? Hell no it wasn’t. But maybe he was trying not to worry Sojiro.

The older male sighed, rubbing the top of his head. “Learn to be more careful, would ya? Gave me a heart attack…”

But Ren slipped out from behind the counter just as Sojiro grabbed for a broom, bringing with him two mugs. Seeing that no one was hurt or anything, Ryuji did think that Boss’ reaction was pretty funny. Poor guy. He seemed stressed though.

Ren placed the mugs in front of his friends, and Ryuji smiled up at him.

“Made with love?” The usual, right? Ren always said it when he brought Ryuji a mug of hot chocolate, and the question earned the blonde a wink.

“Made with love.”

Conversation from then on was lively. Talk turned from work to books, and eventually to something Ryuji hadn’t expected.

“I went to a fortune teller recently.” Ren said as he sat in the booth. One Makoto had left, Ren made himself comfortable beside Ryuji, fingers tapping along the side of a half-full mug of coffee.

What a strange thing to want to do. Ryuji never understood why people went to visit people like fortune tellers. But, if that was what they wanted to waste their money on, then so be it. Ryuji wouldn’t stop them. But he did think that Ren was spending money on something incredibly silly.

“Really? I didn’t expect something like that to come from you.” Yusuke began, but Futaba quickly slapped a hand on his shoulder-- much to the navy haired male’s dismay. 

“I did! Ren’s spontaneous! I bet he saw the fortune teller on his way home from work and stopped to get a reading!”

Ren did chuckle after that, leaning back on the bench against Ryuji’s arm, which had found it’s way to the back of the seating.

It was a little intimate to be sitting this casually with Ren, right? But Makoto didn’t mind earlier… Still, Ryuji found himself sighing, his cheeks staining the lightest shade of pink.

“She’s a friend.” Ren insisted, bringing his mug to his lips. “She said some interesting things too.”

Interesting? What kind of interesting things? Who would know if what their future was predicted as would come true? And with how vague Ryuji assumed the fortune tellers could be, it could relate to a lot of things in someone’s past.

“Like what?” He asked, frowning while he looked to his neighbor.

“I’m curious as well.”

“Me too!”

“She said that I was hiding too many things from people.” Ren was chuckling again, though he was looking down at his coffee mug. “She said I should be more open. I might take her up on that advice.”

Oh.

Maybe she wasn’t just spouting nonsense.

But then Ren looked to Ryuji again, smiling softly. “It’d mean a lot to me if I could introduce you both.”

Ryuji wasn’t sure what Ren was getting at, but he suddenly found himself much more interested in fortune telling.


	19. The Fates

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Enjoy!

Despite seeming well-versed in the city, Ren sure didn’t usually travel far from home. His workplace was close to home, as was every fast food place he ate from. Ryuji had seen him out as far as he worked, but how often did Ren travel out there?

Ryuji didn’t know.

But he hoped it wasn’t often. If he traveled out there once and got hurt, maybe it would happen again.

New York was far from the safest city in the world, after all. Ryuji was just glad that he’d been there to help him.

Still, knowing that Ren was desperately trying to hide something from him really did worry Ryuji. Especially when Ren had trusted him so much to let him into his home for an extended period of time.

Thinking back to that time, Ryuji was vaguely reminded that his ankle still hurt a little bit. Like right now. He tried his hardest to relax, but it was tough when you had to be on your feet so often. 

He sighed, tugging his coat closer to his body as they walked. Hopefully an early spring would come. This constant cold weather was really eating away at him. Walking around in the freezing weather was getting less and less fun by the moment.

Ren assured him that it wasn’t a long trip to where the fortune teller was, but Ryuji really wasn’t sure _how_ far that meant.

But, in the end, he was correct. The duo stood outside of a shop-- _Relief Maiden_. What a weird name. Ryuji wasn’t sure what to think of it. But Ren said the woman was credible.

Ryuji felt a small nudging at his elbow, and he looked over at his neighbor with a frown. Had he been distracted for long? He didn’t think he’d been. In fact, he was sure they’d only just gotten there…

“You look worried.” Oh, so he was just commenting on Ryuji’s face? That hardly seemed polite. Still, he seemed more concerned than anything else, and Ryuji couldn’t help but sigh a little bit.

“I’ve never done anything like this before.” A tarot reading? Ryuji had always thought it to be bullshit. How could one person tell your future with just a few pieces of paper with some pictures on them? It was nonsense. But Ren had mentioned that she said some interesting things… And if there was hope that he could learn more about his neighbor by doing this, then Ryuji was going to have to participate.

Ren’s hand was on his shoulder in a second, giving it a gentle squeeze along with a friendly smile. “It’s not scary. I promise.” Ren sure did promise a lot of things.

But Ryuji nodded. There wasn’t anything to be scared if. If it _was_ all bullshit, then what was he even afraid of? 

Maybe the unknown? 

But Ryuji didn’t want to second think his thoughts. So, he reached out and grasped the handle on the door and turned it before slipping into the store without another word.

The store was rather small and cramped. What little space there was in the middle of the floor was taken up by tables filled with small wares, and the walls were lined with even more things. Crystals, stones, and even some clothing seemed to be the items one could buy from the shop. Metal figurines of things like fairies and dragons, and even jewelry was all over the place. The store was filled to the brim with items patterned with the sun, moon, and stars. It was almost overwhelming, but everything was so fascinating looking.

But the store also reeked of incense. So much so that Ryuji was sure he was going to be leaving with a huge migraine. Seriously. Did all fortune shops _have_ to kill you with the scents? Ryuji had never been into one that didn’t. Then again, this was only the second one he’d ever been to.

The door rang as they entered, though Ryuji did stand in the doorway, unmoving. That was until he felt Ren gently pushing him into the store. Ryuji complied, a little reluctantly, and found himself moving slightly to the side and in front of a small table filled with different stones of all sorts of shapes and colors. Some sparkled and some were dull, and they were every shade of the rainbow and more. Ryuji could identify some of them, but he could hardly make a chunk if he decided to try and name all of the different ones present.

“Welcome!” He heard someone express. And movement at the back of the store caught his eye.

A curtain shifted inside of a doorway, and the beads also hanging from the door rattled slightly as a female moved the fabric aside. Small in stature and sporting long blonde hair, a tiny woman peeked her head out of the backroom, large smile adorning her lips. However, it soon changed. Free hand grasping her hip, a pout formed on her lips and Ryuji swore he saw her puff out her cheeks.

“Oh. It’s _you._ ” She seemed much less cheerful than before. Was she upset with them? Ryuji had never been to the store, but… Well, maybe Ren had a bad history with the female.

Stepping out from behind the curtain, the woman wandered down the crowded aisle, arms crossing over her chest. She didn’t seem pleased, but Ryuji had been correct. She was looking at Ren.

“I gave you a reading yesterday! You’re suddenly visiting me a lot, aren’t you?” She asked. She didn’t bring up Ren’s injury though. Maybe she already knew about it?

Ren chuckled a little bit though, and Ryuji felt hands grab his shoulders, shifting him to the side. Ryuji almost tripped as Ren pulled him in front of himself, hands sticking to his shoulders almost annoyingly firmly.

“I brought you a customer.”

The female blinked, then looking to Ryuji. A small smile forming on her lips. “Oh! Hello! Here for a reading? Follow me!” She seemed awfully chipper when addressing Ryuji. Ren sure did seem to annoy a lot of people. As funny as that sounded, Ryuji could relate. Ren was a handful. The woman did look back to Ren though, pointing a finger in his direction. “You’re sitting in on this one, I’ll have you know!”

And then she turned on her heel and head for the back of the store. Ryuji could hear Ren give a small chuckle, and then before he knew it his feet were carrying him to the back of the store with the aid of Ren’s guidance as well.

There was a small table in the back corner of the store. Curtains hung behind the table, and atop it sat a stack of what looked to be tarot cards. The woman stood off to the side of the table, motioning to the chair at the front of it. 

“Please have a seat!” She said, smile on her lips. 

Ryuji obeyed her, sitting down in the metal folding chair a bit awkwardly. He didn’t even know how to begin doing something like this. Did he just sit there?What did he watch? Surely he would be walked through the process, right?

The woman’s smile softened as she picked up the cards, Ren making his way to her side. She paid him no mind, it seemed, but she did tap on her cards a few times. Ryuji took note of it, for it seemed weird, but then the female began shuffling the cards in her hands, and Ryuji pushed the thought to the back of his mind.

“My name is Chihaya.” She said as she shuffled, gaze on Ryuji. She did this a lot, huh? She was barely watching her hands while she shuffled. Ryuji had to admit that it was pretty cool.

“Hey! I’m Ryuji!” He said, suddenly feeling a bit more interest. Even if this was nonsense, it might prove to be a little interesting, right? So far the visuals were pretty cool.

Chihaya’s head fall to the side a little. “Is this your first reading?”

Feeling pretty sheepish about it, Ryuji slumped back in his seat. It was true. This was his first reading. And he’d doubted that they could even be true up until now. Hopefully she wouldn’t see that though. Regardless, he nodded.

Humming, Chihaya suddenly placed the cards down on top of the table. “We’ll do a simple reading then! Please cut the cards into three piles.”

Any three piles? All right then. 

Ryuji picked up two small piles of the cards, and then placed them neatly into a row. Andthen Chihaya stacked the cards on top of each other, held them close to her against the table, and then slid her hand sideways--effectively fanning out the cards in front of herself. And then she motioned to the cards.

“Pick three and pull them towards you--facing downwards.”

This was weird. But Ryuji did pull three cards towards himself, careful not to move them around too much. And when he was done, Chihaya shifted the extra cards into one pile, setting it off to the side.

“We’ll read the cards facing you.”

Facing him? Oh, right! He’d heard something before about how tarots had different meanings depending on what side they were turned on. But facing him? At least he’d be looking at them the correct way.

Chihaya reached over the small table, fingers on the first card at Ryuji’s left. 

“This card represents your past.” She moved to the middle one, tapping on that next. “This one is your present.” And then she moved to the last one, tapping it gently. “And this is your future.”

She then went back to the first card, reached out, picked up the card, and turned it over.

“Reversed Hermit.” She said, looking down at the card. 

The card had a man on it, and he was adorned in a cloak. In his hand he looked to be holding a bell, or maybe a lantern. And Chihaya was right. It was upside down. Was… That a bad thing?

Feeling himself bite his lip in anticipation, Ryuji looked up to the female as she clarified the meaning for him.

“Isolation, loneliness, and perhaps even withdrawal. Something in your past caused you great distress-- enough so that you hid from the world. You felt alone and saddened by whatever caused your problems, and perhaps you blame a lot of your bad habits on what stemmed from such an event. Your past was not a positive one, but more of a negative one. You felt weak in your youth, and I suspect you still might feel that way now.”

Her eyes darted up to Ryuji, and he felt a flush spread across his cheeks. Well, she was right. Out of all of the things he’d gone through with his father?

The fighting. 

The alcohol.

_The abuse._

His eyes closed, and his hands balled in his lap. He didn’t want to think about his father. About the hostile environment his home used to be. His father picking on himself and his mother. The pushing, shoving, punching…

_The stairs._

All he could think about was the excruciating pain that coursed through his body in the moments that followed.

He felt a hand on his shoulder.

Opening his eyes, Ryuji looked to Ren. His eyebrows were knitted and he was frowning. He leaned forward though, head falling to the side a little.

“You okay?” He asked, and only then did Ryuji notice that Chihaya was staring at him as well.

Swallowing, Ryuji just nodded. He was glad that he wasn’t left to dwell on his own thoughts for so long. It wasn’t a good thing to dwell on the past-- not to him. He hated thinking about it, and he was sure he’d spiral back into that depression if he was left to think to himself too long.

_But Chihaya was right._

Was it all phony? Well…

Yes, definitely. It was definitely all fake. Anyone could feel lonely in their past, right? Everyone went through certain things that turned them into the person that they were now, and Ryuji was sure that everyone he knew could say that their past was traumatic in some way.

Clearing his throat, Ryuji motioned to the cards with one hand. “L-let’s just get back to reading. I’m fine.” He insisted, then resting his hands against the edge of the table. It was best to move on. No need to go too into depth about your tragic past in front of a stranger, right?

Chihaya just nodded after that. She was probably used to people feeling certain ways after having their readings, right? At least she was willing to move on, but sparing a glance to Ren showed that he was still worried and watching Ryuji carefully.

Ryuji flashed him a small, forced smile. He’d be fine. He was strong. He wanted to prove that to Ren.

Chihaya picked up the second card from the middle and flipped it over.

“Upright Lovers.” She began. 

On the card there were four figures. Three stood at the bottom and cupid hung above them with a bow.

“Love, relationships, and values and alignments. Lovers isn’t always a card about finding love romantically, but that seems to be the case with most of the people who draw it.”

_Oh. Oh no._

Love? A _relationship_? It usually meant romantic love… Ryuji had plenty of people that looked attractive, but…

Was Ryuji falling in love with someone? Anyone? He really didn’t have a lot of people in his personal life that he was close to. Ann and Hifumi had been texting him a lot, but he wasn’t really attracted to them aside from their looks. Hell, they were both great girls! But they weren’t really _girlfriend_ material. I that made sense. And the only other person he was closest to was…

He glanced to Ren.

_Nope. No way. There was no way Ryuji was going to try and woo his neighbor._

Ren was his _friend_. That was it.

_Friends._

But his face did heat up a bit more.

Especially when Ren looked to him.

Swallowing a lump in his throat as Ren smiled at him, the black haired male leaned on Chihaya’s chair a little bit, hand on the back of it. 

“Maybe you won’t be so lonely anymore, huh?” He asked. He seemed… Genuinely happy at the thought of Ryuji maybe finding someone to satisfy himself romantically.

Ryuji slumped in his seat.

Chihaya seemed happy as well though, leaning forward on the table with her chin resting on the backs of her hands. “The Lovers doesn’t always mean romance though, so keep that in mind. It’s a card for all sorts of relationships. Friends or coworkers being part of the group as well. I do think this means an end to your loneliness.”

Ryuji _had_ been making a lot of friends lately. It was all because of Ren, but everyone he’d met because of his neighbor was… So nice. In their own way. If anything, they were at least fun people.

That _had_ to be what the card meant, right?

_Of course._

A relationship with Ren? No way. Ryuji almost laughed at his own stupid thought.

Regardless, the tarot seemed to be correct again.

He shifted in his seat, not realizing his grip was on the table so hard until he removed his hands from the surface, palms sweating and fingers aching slightly.

“Now, the last card.” Chihaya reached out and she picked up the card, then turning it over.

And then she paused.

And said nothing.

Was… _Was that a bad thing_?

“Reversed Chariot.” On the card two horses-- black and white. Atop them stood a very sad looking king with a broken arm, who was weakly clutching a staff in his hand.

But what did the card mean? Chihaya’s sudden quietness was really concerning. It… It was a bad thing, wasn’t it?

Her voice was smaller than before. “The reversed Chariot means lack of control or direction, and aggression. It likely means a big change in your life, and one that you’re not comfortable or happy with. Perhaps there’ll be an event that changes your course of life for the worst, or maybe it’ll just affect you negatively. Instead of a sadness approach, you may lose sense of yourself and you may become angry.” 

So his future was going to take a turn for the worse? Ryuji found himself sighing. He knew the good couldn’t last forever, right? Something bad always had to happen in the end. His own joy never stuck around for a long time. He was an unfortunate guy.

But he never really let it affect him. Until now.

He was frowning, slumping in his seat slightly. After the other two predictions had been so accurate, he was really hoping for something good to come out of his future. He was looking forward to something really great to happen-- especially after landing that Lovers card. All these new friends were great.

This was a pretty shitty reading, huh?

But Ren shifting on his feet caught his attention, and he looked up at the other male with a frown. Ren was smiling though, and he was leaning back against the wall with crossed arms over his chest.

“Don’t worry,” he began, smile twisting into a smirk. “You can always change fate.”

Really?

“ _No_ , you _can’t_.” Chihaya insisted, hands on the table in front of herself as she turned slightly to look at Ryuji’s neighbor. “Fate can’t be changed.”

“You gave me a bad reading the other day.” Ren muttered as he looked back to the female, small pout forming on his lips.

Oh? So he’d gotten a negative reading as well? At least Ryuji wasn’t alone on this. But he certainly seemed confident that he could change his own destiny.

“And you’ll uphold it this time! That one time was a fluke!” Regardless of her happy demeanor earlier, she sure seemed positive that something bad was going to happen to the both of them. “Seriously! No normal human can change their fate.”

And Ren actually scoffed at that, slipping his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He was… _Really_ confident that he’d be fine, huh?

But one thing was eating away at Ryuji. 

“Hey, uh… Mind if I ask what he got for his future?” What was Ren so determined to change?

Chihaya looked to Ren, who only shrugged in response. And then she turned back to Ryuji, frowning, though seemingly not as unhappy as before.

“The reversed Fool.” She picked up her cards and flipped through them until she found the card, tugging it from the pile and holding it out to Ryuji. A traveller with a cloth bundle tied on a stick. Attacking the man’s rear end was a dog biting on it. “It represents recklessness, and means that he’s going to do something foolish in the future-- probably due to his own selfishness.”

_Ren? Selfish?_

“He’ll probably take a terrible gamble and he’ll lose something.”

Looking back at Ren, Ryuji frowned. Wow. But what did that even mean? A terrible gamble? And it was predicted that Ryuji would get angry due to an event in his future…

He shook his head. There was no connection. In the end, this was all nonsense.

_Right_?

Ren was still smiling though, and he pushed himself away from the wall. He reached out and pat Ryuji on the shoulder. “What do you think? Time to head out?”

After that reading? Ren was so casual… 

But it was a good idea. Ryuji really wanted to think about what was going to come from his future. Maybe, if it was true, he could prepare for it…

He nodded, pushing the folding chair back as he stood up. Right. Time to head out. He glanced down at Chihaya, who was standing herself, and held out a hand to her.

“Hey, uh… Thanks. Even if it’s not great, it was nice tryin’ out somethin’ new!” He at least had to be polite, right?

And Chihaya only smiled, shaking his hand in return. “Of course. Please come back anytime. Browse the products if you’d like. Maybe a luck charm would help you.”

A luck charm? Not a bad idea. But it was about time to head out. Ryuji wanted to get out of this stuffy, smelly store.

They were on the street in a few short moments, and Ren stood off to the side to light up a cigarette in his mouth. Slipping the carton and lighter back into his pocket, he turned to Ryuji, taking a drag of the stick.

And Ryuji was about to speak when something caught his ear. A familiar tone-- a ringtone? Was his phone ringing?

Giving his pockets a quick pat-down, Ryuji finally tugged his phone from one of his jean pockets only to find the screen black. Huh? That was--

“Hello?” Oh, it was Ren’s phone.

Maybe Ryuji should have actually thought about whether it was _his_ own ringtone or not. Oh well.

But Ren turned away from him, likely to make the call a little more private. “Huh? Now? I’m busy.” There was a pause after that, and then Ren sighed. “Yeah, I remember.” Another pause. “Right. I’ll be there.”

He hung up without even saying goodbye.

And then he turned back to Ryuji, slipping his phone back into his pocket. “Sorry, that was… Important.” 

“It’s fine!” Ryuji was smiling as he waved off the apology, but then he frowned, raising an eyebrow. “But, uh, everything okay?” Did Ren have to leave? Ryuji was really hoping for them to be able to spend the whole day together.

“He just shrugged, sucking on his cigarette once again before he continued. “I have to drop something off. For a friend.”

A _friend_?

That didn’t sound so bad. But Ren seemed a little bit annoyed. Maybe he just didn’t want to leave Ryuji as well.

So Ryuji smiled after that, stuffing his hands into the pockets on his jacket. “I’ll come with ya!”

Ren seemed confused by that though, actively blinking in confusion. He didn’t say anything though. He just… Stared.

And Ryuji suddenly felt a little self conscious. Was it… A _bad_ thing to offer to join him? He did sort of invite himself through his wording…

“I mean,” he said, then scratching the back of his head. “If that’s cool. I’d really like to come though!” If only to not have to go home to an empty apartment again. After that reading, Ryuji really wanted to have someone by his side. There was no telling then his fortune would come true, and he’d rather have someone close by to help support him if it happened sooner rather than later. 

As selfish as that sounded.

Ren seemed to be a little conflicted with his feelings though, pressing his hand to his lips as he thought. Really? Did he have to take so long to consider bringing Ryuji along? What kind of friend was this?

“Are you sure?” Ren asked, his gaze darting to Ryuji once again. “It’ll just be a quick trip. I just have to drop something off.”

Ren was acting weird. 

But…

Maybe this was what he’d been hiding all along!

And now Ryuji wanted to know more than anything.

Smiling wide, Ryuji’s hands balled into fists as he took a step closer to his neighbor, who stepped back in return. “Yeah!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I absolutely adore Chihaya! I love her character so much! Let's hope I get to write her in the future again!


	20. Metal Casings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is no excuse for why this chapter took so long to be written, and I apologize for that from the bottom of my heart-- really I do. I won't make excuses whatsoever and I won't bore you with too many details, but I can _explain_ what's been going on in my life. However, I won't bother you with that before the story. If you're interested, please see the notes at the end. Thank you!
> 
> Please enjoy!

Ren said that the trip would be a bit of a long one. It was to a shop he said his friend worked at-- _owned_ , even. 

Ren knew a lot of people that owned businesses. Ryuji honestly wondered how he’d met all of these people. Had he gone into the shops to meet them? Had he just met them on the street? Ren was a popular guy though, and he really liked to make conversation. It was no surprise that he had a lot of friends.

But how he’d met people so far away, Ryuji had no idea. Had he worked around here at one point? Who knew? Not Ryuji. But he did know that they took the train all the way to the stop that Ryuji would have gotten off to get to his place of work. Strange. 

They’d had to stop at the apartment on the way here. It was a short trip. Ren had mentioned that he just had to grab something from his place really quickly. In fact, he’d insisted that it would be so quick that Ryuji offered to just chill in the lobby while he grabbed… Whatever it was he was currently holding in his hands.

But he’d been right. It had only taken him a few short minutes to grab whatever he needed, and now they were apparently “close” to their destination. They’d passed by Ryuji’s workplace on the way here, and for a moment he thought that maybe he should stop in to say hello to whoever was working. But… He really didn’t know any of the day people there unless they worked close to his own hours…

And, honestly, he didn’t want to be anywhere near that place when he didn’t have to be. 

He was thankful they’d merely just passed by the store.

Looking over to his friend, Ryuji glanced to the bag in his hand. Paper-- just like when he’d shown up to Ryuji’s workplace. Maybe they were heading to see that friend he’d met up with that night.

Wait. His _friend_. That meant…

Ryuji thought back to that night. Ren came into the shop, bought a drink, had a… _Hickey_ on his chest.

Oh man. Maybe they were heading to see whoever he was dating. Or were they just a fuck buddy?

Whoever it was, Ryuji was suddenly unsure if he wanted to meet them. What were they like? Surely they were good looking. All of Ren’s friends were attractive.

Would that intimidate Ryuji? But…

_Why_ would it intimidate him? He had no reason to feel intimidated by one other person. Maybe it was because he was afraid that there was someone out there closer to Ren than he was…

_That had to be it._

He just didn’t want anyone to be as close to his neighbor as he was! But nothing would drive a wedge between them, right? Nothing!

Ryuji still found himself swallowing hard.

And then Ren stopped.Oh. Were they here? Ryuji had never been so far from his apartment before. This was a new adventure. But looking up to the name above the shop, Ryuji frowned. 

_Untouchable_?

What a weird name. What was in there? Glancing down at the windows, he frowned. Were… Were those _guns_?

Guns.

Ryuji had never seen a gun in person before. Surely they wouldn’t just have them hanging up in the windows, right? Not _real_ ones at least. Those were probably just models. They’d be too easy to steal… Right? However, there seemed to be permanent bars on the windows. Good. Guns, as cool as they were, weren’t safe.

Without another word, Ren reached out for the doorknob of the shop, tugging the door open and holding it for Ryuji.

“Thanks, man.” He muttered as he wandered into the store, eyes wide as he looked at the walls lined with what looked like model guns. The shop was nearly filled to the brim with gun memorabilia, and Ryuji found himself staring. Wow. This place was pretty cool!

“Huh. Wondered when you were finally gonna show up.”

Ryuji’s gaze fell to the counter where a male sat, feet propped up onto the counter. Closing the magazine he had laying on his lap, the male stood up. He looked pretty gruff, and he tugged a lollipop from his mouth.

“I told you I was busy.” Ren muttered. He placed the bag he was carrying onto the glass counter and shoved it in the direction of the other male. Huh. Ren seemed a little bit annoyed. No wonder he wasn’t all that talkative on the way over. Well _less_ talkative than usual.

“It all here?” The male asked, looking at Ren with a raised eyebrow. He seemed skeptical. He was… Almost accusatory even? Holy cow.

He picked up the bag, which looked like it was just a brown paper lunch bag, opening it up and peeking into it.

“I don’t half-ass a favor.” Well, Ren wasn’t wrong.

Looking back up to Ren with a frown, suddenly a chuckle came from the man’s throat and he smirked, rolling up the top of the bag and then placing it on a shelf behind himself. 

Wandering over to a section of the counter, Ryuji placed his hands on top. He wasn’t really interested in their conversation, but _wow_. This shop? It was so cool! The store was so full of things like magazines for reading and for guns-- bullets, sights, even _silencers_. Oh, _wow_.

And then Ryuji looked back to the duo. If he was right, and this was who Ren had spent that night with, then… Well, was he into _older_ guys? This store owner couldn’t be close to their age. Sure, he wasn’t _old_ , but maybe… Middle aged?

He never imagined Ren would be into older guys. But even so, Ren didn’t seem happy to see him. So maybe… This wasn’t his boyfriend or fuck buddy or whatever. Maybe Ryuji had made it into the clear. See? Nothing to worry about. Ren didn’t even really give the impression that he wanted to be here.

When Ryuji saw the man point his thumb behind himself, he looked away. Something on the wall was really catching his eye-- a _shotgun_ that looked so cool it practically had Ryuji’s name written on it.

Too bad he didn’t believe in owning a firearm. There was no need to, right? It was dangerous. 

“Here, I promised a reward.” He heard the older male say, but he kept his gaze on the gun in front of himself. “Come ‘round back.”

“No.”

And then suddenly he felt eyes on him. The hair stood up on the back of his neck. From the corner of his eye, he looked to the duo just in time to spot Ren looking away from him.

“Another time. I’m _busy_.”

Oh? But _were_ they busy? They’d come all the way here and everything. Surely that meant that Ren had a bit of time to waste. If he was dropping something off for a friend, then… Well, surely they could hang out a little longer, right?

“Hey!” Ryuji found himself saying as he slid back over to the duo. “We don’t have to leave just yet, right?” He asked, gaze darting back over to the model he’d been eyeing for just a moment.

No hurry, right? They could have a little more time here. He was practically begging Ren. He just wanted to look! Guns were dangerous, but they were so cool to look at!

The shop owner looked to the wall that Ryuji had been looking at just before, a smirk on his face. “Storm Shot? Nice choice.” He said, then waving his hand in front of himself. “I’d sell it to ya-”

“Iwai.” Oh, so that was his name?

“ _If_ you were a real enthusiast.”

A real enthusiast? Like someone who had a _lot_ of guns? Hell, Ryuji could never afford one, even if he wanted one.

But that _did_ sound cool! Iwai was such a casual guy in a shop like this! It was awesome!

Still, Ren didn’t seem happy with him. Ryuji had to remember that.But he didn’t seem like a bad guy. Maybe a little rough at times. Teasing though? Definitely. But Ren deserved that. He was _very_ much a pain in the ass when it came to teasing.

Ren didn’t seem pleased though, hand pressed to the cold glass of the countertop and glancing down at Iwai with an upturned nose. The older male was leaning on his elbows on the glass, tugging a lollipop from his mouth and pointing it at Ren.

“Look,” he began, licking at the lollipop before continuing. Wow. Did he have a jar of them laying around? The more he thought about it, the more Ryuji wanted one too. “I know you had trouble. Your eye’s proof of that.” He said, then standing up.

What? Trouble? What was he talking about? Sure, Ren got jumped, but… Did Iwai know about it beforehand?

“But I warned ya. Don’t mess with-”

“ _Iwai_.” Something about Ren’s voice was… Different. Careless and cold, and so unlike anything Ryuji had heard out of him. Honestly, it scared him a bit. But… He wanted-- _needed_ to know more about Ren at this point.

So he decided to be a bit brave, and possibly a bit stupid. Looking to the two, Ryuji frowned. “Mess with _who_?”

And then the two looked towards him. It was silent after that. It was obvious that Ren was desperately trying to hide something from him. He _always_ was. Ryuji was honestly sick and tired of it.

Iwai was the first to make a move after that. He seemed tired of waiting for Ren to say something, so he sighed and pushed himself from the counter.

“Hey.” He said, looking back to Ren and then reaching out-- poking his chest. Ren seemed rather heavy-footed though. He barely moved. “Protect yourself, kid. You may not care, but ya got people that _do_.”

Ren was silent for a moment after that, though he did scoff as he looked away. And then he shoved Iwai’s hand away from his chest. 

“Don’t worry about me. I’m not a child.”

“Ya sure act like a little brat.”

They really didn’t get along, huh? But, as usual, Ren had to surprise him.

Out of nowhere, he reached out, grabbing onto the lollipop from Iwai’s hand. He brought it to his lips and popped it into his mouth, a triumphant smirk on his face. He’d moved so fast that Ryuji hadn’t even processed what he’d done until moments after, blinking wide.

Wow.

He’d seemed like he was in such a bad mood earlier too…

Why did Ren always flip his mood like a switch? It just… Something was so _weird_ about it.

Iwai made a groan of disapproval after that, shaking his head. 

Popping the lollipop from his mouth after that, Ren pointed at Iwai with it. “Don’t ask for anymore favors anytime soon.” He said, spotting a wink at the older male. Favors? Jeez, how many favors did Akira do for this guy? “Don’t want to get _jumped_ again.

They were certainly ignoring him now, huh?

But Iwai shook his head after that, sighing. At least he was smiling again though-- maybe a little exasperatedly, but… Well, he was smiling at least.

“Yeah, yeah.”

“I’ll be back for my _reward_ tomorrow.” Ren then said, arm wrapping around Ryuji as he lead him back to the door. Huh? They were leaving already? But… But he didn’t want to go… He wanted to check out a few more guns…

But it seemed like he wasn’t going to get to do that, huh? He pouted.

“Yeah. Be careful out there.” He heard Iwai call as they slipped out of the store.

And with that, after the door to the shop was successfully closed, Akira sighed. He let himself frown again, rubbing the back of his neck.

“Sorry about that.” He muttered, the lollipop being removed from his mouth with his free hand. 

Ryuji, shoving his hands into his pockets, turned to face Ren with a small half-smile. “It’s okay, man. You two close?”

Ren just nodded after that, his gaze falling to the ground. He was silent for a few long moments, and Ryuji opened his mouth to say something, but… He was abruptly cut off. Ren did that a lot, huh?

“Hey,” he began, looking up at the blonde again. “Forget about that. What we talked about.”

_Forget about it_? But _how_? How could he forget that Iwai could possibly know what was going on with Ren?

“Wait, but-”

“ _Forget it_.” Ren’s words were tough, but he didn’t seem… Angry. Not at Ryuji, at least. But then he smiled a little bit, quickly reaching out and stuffing the lollipop into Ryuji’s mouth. The blonde made a noise of surprise, eyes blinking wide.

“Saw you eyeing it.” He finally said after a moment, then chuckling. And with that, Ren turned on his heel and began wandering in, presumably, the direction of the nearest train station. “Come on. Let’s get dinner.”

And Ryuji didn’t feel the need to question him after that. Licking on the sucker in his mouth, he obediently followed after his neighbor, hands slipping into his pockets.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As stated earlier, I will explain why I've not been as active without going too deep into detail.
> 
> I am not in a good place emotionally or physically. Life is really trying to bring me down. I am so _busy_ nowadays that it's eating away at me. Not one day do I get to sit down and relax. I don;t get days off from work or stress anymore. However, Sunday will supposedly be my last officially busy day in the foreseeable future. I would like to get back to a normal schedule after that.
> 
> Due to my own stress issues though, I had to take quite a few days off from writing.
> 
> I would like to say that I promise it won't happen again, but I'm not sure if it will or not. This story will not be abandoned though-- don't be afraid! I just hope that you all may understand that my personal life has been nothing short of _terrible_ recently. I don't want sympathy for it! I'll pull through!
> 
> But thank you for understanding, and thank you for not giving up hope in me.
> 
> I love you all, and I hope that you'll have a wonderful day! I'll try my hardest to get the next chapter out as soon as possible!
> 
> Thank you for reading!


	21. Revelations

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry about this one, guys! A few of my stressful moments have passed, but there's still so many left. However, I'm _really_ hoping that I can make it up to you guys soon! Enjoy!

Man, their time at Iwai’s shop was pretty weird, huh? Ren seemed like he was in a better mood after they left, but the way he acted in the shop wasn’t exactly… It was weird. But at least he knew that Iwai was a crucial key n knowing what Ren was up to. Clearly he knew something-- from his own words to the way Ren acted?

Maybe Ryuji would have to become a gun enthusiast, huh? He could learn a lot from Iwai. In theory. He’d have to keep the shop in mind. What was it called? _Untouchable_.

Huh. But after that trip, he really hadn’t seen Ren much. With the combination of reversed work hours as well as something Ren described as a _”side job”_ , he seemed to be almost too busy for Ryuji.

He couldn’t help but feel like Iwai knew something about this _side job_. Ryuji didn’t push Ren to tell him more about it.

It never felt like the right time to.

But it was always nice to see Ren while he could. More often than not, Ryuji had found their usual meeting place at Leblanc while Ren was working. It wasn’t bad. Boss really knew his way around a pot of curry, and Ren knew how to make some really good hot chocolate. 

And Ryuji had also come to know Leblanc as… Well, the usual meeting place for all of Ren’s friends. Everyone from Yusuke to Chihaya, and even that weird doctor Tae came by for curry and a chance to speak with Ryuji’s neighbor.

But right now? Ren was off from work. He and Ryuji had texted back and forth for quite a bit of time earlier on in the day, but it looked like he was too busy to join for lunch. Oh well. It wasn’t like Ryuji was a stranger to eating alone. At least he had his phone.

Scrolling through the screen while he waited for his curry to cool slightly, Ryuji frowned. Activity seemed slow on his social media accounts. It wasn’t like he followed many other accounts, but would it kill anyone to do anything interesting? He almost laughed at that thought.

Faintly in the back of his mind he heard the jingle of the front door opening though, but he really didn’t pay it any mind. He just kept scrolling through his phone, debating on whether he should shoot Hifumi a text or not. Hell, why not? Ryuji was free tomorrow. Why not meet up for shogi again? She was really good and often neglected to let Ryuji win (or rather never let him win), but she was good company. She was nice. 

So, Ryuji brought up his messages and shot a quick one over to Hifumi.

_I’m free tomorrow if u wanna kick my ass at shogi! (•̀ᴗ•́)و ̑̑_

As strange as it were, Ryuji found himself picking up small habits from Ren. His neighbor often added things like cute emojis into his texts. Ryuji was used to using the simpler ones, but after spotting Ren adding the adorable little emojis to his own texts, Ryuji couldn’t help but want to do the same.

It was weird, but friends did that, right? Picked up each other’s habits?

Like how Ren sometimes let a little bit of Ryuji’s vocabulary slip on his tongue. Ha. It was pretty cute when Ryuji noticed it though.

He chuckled a little bit to himself at the thought of Ren copying his mannerisms a little bit, but a voice caught his attention.

“Hello, Ryuji! It’s been a while!” That voice. It was… Familiar. Small and mousy and sweet just like whipped cream. 

Ryuji raised an eyebrow as he looked up to see a female standing beside the table. She looked familiar. That reddish hair, those big eyes… Thinking for a moment, Ryuji hoped he got her name right.

“Hey! Uh, _Haru_ , right?” He asked, smiling at her. She nodded. “Yeah! It’s been a while!”

Uh. Should he ask her to sit down? She wasn’t exactly a _friend_. They’d only spoken once before. But would it be weird for them to sit at different tables? Clearly they knew each other and they seemed to be on good terms, but… Did they even know each other?

It seemed like Haru had the answer to their dilemma though, motioning to the booth seat across from Ryuji. “Do you mind if I join you?”

Well now it would just be _rude_ if he turned her down. Right? She was asking so politely to sit with him, and… Well, it would be a shame to lose such great company, right?

Ryuji silently thanked Haru for knowing what to do in a situation like this. And thus, he motioned to the seat across from himself. 

“Sure! Sit down!”

Haru took his offer with a smile, tugging her jacket from her shoulders before laying in the booth, then slipping in beside it. She was well dressed. Ryuji wondered if she’d just come from work or something. The style suited her nicely, and her hair was tugged back into a bun. Huh.

“How are you?” She asked, hands folding atop the table.

“I’m good.” Ryuji muttered as he turned off the screen of his phone. That wasn’t necessary, right? Now that he had someone to pay attention to, he didn’t need to find something to occupy his mind. He slipped the phone into his pocket, then looking back to Haru. “How are you though? Been busy?”

Haru offered Ryuji a smile. It looked a little sympathetic. Oh. She probably had been really busy then, huh? That sucked. Hopefully now that she was at the cafe she could relax a little.

“Hey, Haru!” From his time visiting Leblanc, Ryuji had learned that Futaba helped out on the days that Ren or Boss were off from work. A part time job on top of her supposed schooling? She was a busy person, huh? But she seemed energetic enough to handle it. Slipping over to their table from behind the counter, she leaned on top of the wood, chin in her hand. “What’ll ya have?”

Looking to Futaba with her smile widening, Haru’s shoulders fell slightly. “I’ll just have a coffee, thank you. I should get home soon.”

So she couldn't stay long. Well, at least Ryuji would have someone to eat with for at least a little bit. 

After a few short minutes Haru was rewarded with her coffee, and she added a little bit of cream and sugar.

Haru stirred her coffee with interest, humming and watching her little mug as she did. She seemed like a sweet girl-- sensitive maybe. But what did Ryuji know? He’d barely ever spoken to her.

But once she was done stirring, she placed the spoon down and lifted her mug, bringing it to her lips slowly. 

But what did they even talk about? Ryuji wasn’t sure. Haru was a friend of a few friends. They probably didn’t have much-- if _anything_ in common. He found himself fiddling with the spoon to his curry a little awkwardly before catching Haru’s eye. She was smiling and watching him; maybe in an almost mocking sort of way? Or perhaps there was just a playful glint in her eyes. 

“Ren said that you both are neighbors.” Oh, so she wanted to talk about Ren? Sure. It wasn’t like Ryuji had anything to lose by it. Hell, if he was one thing that they could speak about due to their similar interest in him, then great!

Ryuji chuckled. “Yeah! He’s a great guy!”

Haru hummed in response as she sipped her coffee, then placing the mug down. “He certainly is. I owe a lot to him.” Her and everybody else, it seemed. 

Still, she seemed a little lost in thought after that, fingers brushing against the mug in her hands idly.

“Ryuji, I’d like to ask you something.” She began, a small smile on her lips as she looked down at her mug, thumbs rubbing against the rim of it. 

Ryuji, who by then had ventured into taking a bite of his curry, stopped midway to respond, eyes blinking. “Huh? What’s up?”

Glancing up to Ryuji, Har’s smile on grew slightly. Playful in nature and perhaps a little intimidating, she asked a question that genuinely had Ryuji perplexed. “What is your opinion of Ren?”

His opinion? What kind of a question was that?

Well, he could at least try to break it down a bit. There were plenty of thing he liked about Ren. He was nice, funny, hardworking. Despite his shitty attitude a lot of the time.

Sitting back in his seat, Ryuji thought for a moment. Was that _really_ the kind of answer Haru was looking for though? She hadn’t asked about specifics. She asked about his opinion. But something about the way she asked it had Ryuji question just how she’d like him to respond.

He frowned, finger pressed to his lip as he finally came to a conclusion. She couldn’t be looking too deeply into his answer, now could she? Haru wasn’t sadistic. She was nice! Really nice! Ryuji really shouldn’t be thinking too hard about her motives. 

Feeling a smile weave onto his lips, Ryuji decided it was in his best interest to answer her. 

“Well,” he began, leaning forward onto the table again. “He’s a cool guy, you know? Funny and caring. I mean, he can be a huge pain in the ass,” he chuckled to himself a little bit. “But he’s a good guy. If anythin’, he’s got a big heart. He’s helped me out a lot since we first met too. He’s just so nice, and attractive, and warm. Like sittin’ in front of a fire with a blanket and hot chocolate on a really cold day.” That was something he could compare Ren to, right?” Honestly…” Ryuji reached out and picked up the spoon to his curry, moving the food around on his bowl. “I’m not really sure how to answer your question. I just… I admire him. A lot. He’s just such a cool guy, you know? I… I like him. A lot.” Probably a little too much.

But was that a good enough answer for Haru Ryuji certainly hoped it was the kind of answer that she was looking for…

“You have a lot of kind words, Ryuji…” He heard Haru say.

“Yeah! And if I had any say in it, I’d say you might have a little crush on my brother!” Futaba’s voice was in a sing-song pitch. Hell, Ryuji hadn’t even known she’d been there to hear it.

Looking up to spot Haru with her hands covering her mouth and failing to suppress a large smile and Futaba leaning on the back of Haru’s seat with a shit-eating grin on her face, Ryuji felt his face heat up dramatically.

He sat back in his booth, one hand pressed to the top of the table while the other covered his bright red cheeks. _God_ , did she really have to say it like _that_?

“I-I do not!”

Did he?

Certainly not! He did _not_ have a crush on his neighbor! Remember that romances like that were _not_ his thing!

_Ryuji did not have a crush on Ren._

“You’re crazy!” Ryuji said, voice cracking slightly. He was so embarrassed. Ugh. He felt like he was dying!

The blush spread from his cheeks all the way down to his shoulders. His ears felt hot, and he had to tug the collar of his shirt away from his skin a little bit. It was impossibly hot, and all of the eyes on him had him feeling insecure.

And questioning his own feelings.

But then Haru leaned onto the table, chin in her hand. “I think it’s _cute_ , Ryuji. The words you say are so sweet. I’m sure Ren would love to hear them.”

What? No chance! Ren was never allowed to hear what Ryuji said! If it were up to him, those words would never leave this room!

“No way in hell!” Ryuji said, pointing an accusing finger at the female in front of himself. “He’d never let me live ‘em down!”

Ren _really_ hated letting people live shit down. Ryuji still had minor vocal mishaps that Ren continued to bring up every so often. So Ren was better with English. Sue him.

“You know,” Futaba said, setting one hand holding a tray against her hip. “Judging by him, I’d say he might like you too.”

And Haru nodded at that. “I think so too!”

“No! There is no ‘too’!” Ryuji said, shaking his head and his hands. “I am _not_ crushin’ on my neighbor! This ain’t some cheesy novel!” Even from the first few days he’d known Ren, Ryuji had told himself not to care too much about this weird guy. This wasn’t some lovey-dovey romance. They were neighbors, and that was how it would stay.

But then again…

The idea that someone may be interested in him was… Intriguing.

But someone like _Ren_? He was… Well, he didn’t seem like the type to want to _settle_ for someone like Ryuji…

And Ryuji did slump in his seat, a frown on his face as he looked between the two females-- his previous energy seeming to have dismissed a bit.

“But, uh… You really think so?”

The smirk on Futaba’s face only grew at his response. She let out a hearty laugh, slapping the back of Haru’s shoulder and causing Haru to almost spill the mug of coffee in her hands. 

“If there’s one thing I know about Ren,” The red-haired female began, wiping a fake tear from her eye before shoving her glasses up higher on her nose.”It’s that Ren only looks at three things the same way. One; his cat.” She stood upright, tucking the tray under one arm so that she could count on her fingers. “Two; his coffee.” Okay, well those were self explanatory. Morgana and coffee were Ren’s favorite things.

And then Futaba stopped at her third finger, her shit eating grin spreading across her face even wider. Hell, she looked just like Ren when he was trying to tease Ryuji.They may not have been related, but some concepts sure did run in the same (chosen) family. Jeez.

“And _you_.” 

Ryuji only felt his cheeks grow brighter at those words, and he sunk down in his seat. There was no way that Ren had a crush on him, right? They were just best friends! Nothing more!

“I have to agree.” Haru said, finally composing herself after that (particularly hard) slap on her back. It seemed like her coffee hadn’t been entirely saved from it’s spilling, because she was gently wiping something from her hands, and Ryuji assumed it was her drink. “Have you tried speaking to him about it?”

A… About it? Like having a crush on him?

“Hell no! I don’t have a crush on Ren!”

Futaba and Haru just exchanged glances, and Ryuji suddenly felt self conscious again. Really? What was up with them? It sure felt they were plotting against Ryuji or something. 

But then another customer had entered the cafe, and Futaba turned to greet them. After she’d run off though, Haru leaned forward. Her smile softened at Ryuji, and he could feel himself take a deep breath.

Haru was a lot easier to handle than Futaba. She was calmer and quite a bit more polite.

That wasn’t to say Ryuji didn’t _like_ Futaba. Haru was just… Easier to talk to.

“He thinks very fondly of you, Ryuji.” She said, her head tilting sideways slightly. Ah, Haru was so cute.

“Uh, yeah…” Ryuji found himself muttering as he pulled his phone from his pocket. A thought suddenly came to mind though. Should he bring it up? “Speaking of Ren though, he invited me out tonight…”

While they were on the topic of Ryuji’s neighbor, it might have been nice to comment about that, right? It seemed to keep Haru interested though, and she sat up in her seat with her hands in her lap.

“Oh? Where to?”

Well, that was the money question. Ryuji had asked him, but Ren was… Really avoiding answering it. The more he denied answering, the more Ryuji wanted to know.

But Ren had always been a secretive kind of guy.

Sighing as he looked down at his phone, Ryuji brought up the messages he shared with his neighbor. Ren’s name sat at the top of his phone with the emoji of the “okay hand” symbol next to it. A joke, really. They were friends. 

But the longer Ryuji looked at the name, the more he thought that… Maybe it might have been time to change that symbol to something a little more meaningful.

“Who knows.” Ryuji muttered, a small smile playing on his lips. “Guess I’ll find out tonight.”

A crush on Ren though? Huh. Maybe he did.


	22. Lights

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Had to up the rating because of this chapter
> 
> There are no excuses for how late this chapter is. I know a lot of you keep telling me that I should take my time and that real life is more important than writing this story, but I do apologize. I feel so horrible for this taking so long, and honestly? There were some minor set backs, but most of the reason for this chapter taking so long is strictly due to laziness. I am so sorry about this, and I hope to update at better paces soon. 
> 
> In other news, I really hope you guys like this chapter! I'm happy with it, and I'm sure you will be too! Some big stuff happens!
> 
> Enjoy!
> 
> This chapter is dedicated to Voido because I win B)

Ren had been pretty secretive about where they were going. He refused to tell Ryuji anything _about_ the place, but he did send vague hints through texts.

_It’s only a short walk_

_I’ll pay, so don’t worry_

_Wear something cute, Ryuji! ✧٩(•́⌄•́๑)و ✧_

Something cute though? And Ren was offering to pay? What was this? Some kind of glorified date? It definitely seemed like it from the weird text messages that Ren insisted on sending. And just thinking about them had Ryuji blushing a little bit.

He’d never agreed to a date. Nor did Ren ask him out on one.

And he still wasn’t sure if he was interested in the guy like that. He definitely _might_ be. But nothing would come of it, right? This whole time Ryuji had been telling himself not to care about his neighbor as more than just that. A neighbor.

Still, he’d widdled into the blonde’s life without remorse. Almost turned the damn thing upside down.

Before Ren forced his way into Ryuji’s life, Ryuji had never been all that social. He had no friends. No one to talk to or confide in. But after meeting Ren, that had all changed. 

From his reunion with Ann to the occasional hanging out at Yusuke’s… What did he call it? Atelier? That was just a fancy way of saying his paint studio. But it was fun. As weird as all of Ren’s friends were, they were close, and they were fun to hang out with.

But a _crush_? A crush, of all things? Maybe not. Maybe so. Ryuji didn’t want to dwell on it too much.

But after Haru and Futaba had spoken about it… He really couldn’t think of much else. It’d been on his mind all day…

And even now, as he wandered down the sidewalk beside Ren, Ryuji thought about it.

It was a little late at night. Ren was usually asleep by this time. It had been dark for a long time now, and the chilly air whipped against Ryuji’s back as he walked, hands in his pockets. Ren had been quiet, as usual, as they walked, but he seemed to be in a good mood-- smiling and walking with a pep in his step.

“So, uh… You gonna tell me where we’re goin’?”

Maybe it was best to find out just what kind of place they were heading to. Ryuji had put on his best pair of jeans for tonight, dammit.

He looked over to Ren as the black haired male hummed, fingers shoved into his jean pockets. Maybe his hands were cold too. Ryuji’s were freezing. “You’ll see.”

What was up with that sing-song voice of his? It was really irritating Ryuji. It felt like he was dragging the blonde on some kind of wild goose chase or something. Ugh.

In the distance, faint music and bustling could be heard. They were in a busy part of the city, and it was always loud in the good ol’ Big Apple anyway, so Ryuji didn’t really think much of it. Cars still drove by honking their horns despite the late hour, and there was still bustling going on around them.

Still, he was incredibly curious.

He pouted.

“Y’can’t hide it from me for forever, man.” Ryuji insisted. And he was right! They’d definitely get there… Eventually.

Soon they came up to a crowd though. Folks were lined up on the street talking. They were in various states of dress (or undress, Ryuji noted, as he looked at how scantily-clad some of them were). He hardly noticed that Ren had stopped until he was a few steps ahead of his neighbor.

Stopping at such a quick pace had him stumbling forward slightly, but then he turned to face the other male with a frown. Huh?

Ren was facing him, a smirk on his face illuminated by the lights on the front of the building-- purples and greens and blues cascading over his face. The crack in his glasses had the one lense appearing as two different shades of color though. Poor guy still had to get those fixed, didn’t he?

But something about that look on his face had Ryuji worried. Huh? Why did he stop outside of a place like this? It was loud. There was a shit ton of people out here. Why did he look so mischievous?

Tugging one had from his pocket, Ren motioned to the building beside them, though he kept his gaze on Ryuji. “We’re here.”

Oh. So that was what he was getting at. Well, great! They were here! Sure was a lot of people around though…

Looking to the building, Ryuji frowned. Huh? What kind of a place was this? With all of the people dressed in hopes to impress, bustling around with bright lights blaring… The windows to the building were clear and Ryuji could spot some people dancing. And those that waited in line were… Being carded? By two impressive-looking guys. And by “impressive” Ryuji meant htey looked rather burly.

Looking back to Ren with one eyebrow raised, Ryuji’s nose scrunched a little. “What _is_ this place?”

Ren’s smirk only grew at that and he chuckled, hand going back to his pocket. “It’s a gay club.”

 _A gay club_. What kind of indication had Ren gotten that Ryuji belonged in a place like this? It wasn’t his style at all! Oh, and-

“I’m not gay.”

“Well, you’re not straight either.”

He had a point.

Still, Ryuji just crossed his arms over his chest. “This kinda place ain’t my style, dude.” Just because Ren was going to be there didn’t mean that Ryuji was going to automatically be comfortable with being around all… _This_.

There was a lot of people here! Everyone was so close to each other! And it was really loud too. Ryuji didn’t mind when things got a little loud, but there had to be a limit to it!

And, worst of all, there was a lot of alcohol in clubs.

But as if Ren read his mind (or maybe just the nervous expression upon his face as he looked to the sign above the windows), he chuckled.

“Come on. It’s worth a shot.” And then he winked at Ryuji once the blonde was looking at him again. “Promise I won’t have more than one drink.”

Well, that didn’t really reassure him. But… But Ren hadn’t broken a promise yet. Ryuji did have to admit that he really liked dancing. It was fun and it relieved a lot of stress. If drunk people were around though, it may _cause_ stress… 

Still, it didn’t sound like the _worst_ idea. Ryuji had nothing else to do tonight, and… Hopefully Ren would understand if he had to leave.

Hell, if he was lucky, maybe it’d even be _fun_.

Dancing wasn’t all that bad. And maybe Ren was good at it. He still didn’t know what prompted his neighbor to think that he’d like a place like this though…

Pouting for a moment, Ryuji watched the patrons of the club through the window for a few moments before he looked back to Ren with a nod. Ren, in return, seemed pleased. He smiled wide, grabbing Ryuji by the arm and dragging him to the back of the line.

Most of the people in line were dressed in clothing that wasn’t appropriate for the winter months. Women in short dresses and men in just button ups or with bare arms. Everyone was dressed to impress, huh? And here Ryuji stood in just his best pair of jeans and his nicest shirt… And his sweatshirt, of course.

Ren looked impressive as always though.

Always the show off.

Outside of the club was a ramp that everyone was lined up on to get to the front door. It appeared that there would be a step up to get inside. But it left some rails to lean on while they waited, and Ren took full advantage of that.

Ryuji, however, found himself standing stiff. He was fidgeting with the hem of the jacket he wore. He’d never been to a bar before-- let alone a _club_. Sure, a club probably had more to do, but there was also less food. And Ryuji really did love food.

Ren seemed to pick up on his nervous nature though, because Ryuji soon felt a hand on his shoulder. A glance to his left proved that his neighbor was indeed watching him. His smile was still on his face, but it had fallen quite a bit.

“You all right?” He asked, one of his eyebrows raising high over the rim of his glasses. Looking over the other male’s face proved that most of Ren’s injuries from that night in the alley had faded quite dramatically. In fact, Ryuji wasn’t sure that he could see the bruise on his cheek anymore. His glasses still needed replacing though. 

And for a moment Ryuji wondered when he would get around to doing that. Ren had a lot of expensive stuff in his apartment. Surely he could afford some new glasses, right? Or maybe he was just attached to this pair.

Ryuji found himself taking a deep breath-- a _sigh_. “Yeah. I’m fine.” His wavering voice said otherwise.

Ren’s smile faded slightly though and he shoved at Ryuji’s arm almost playfully, causing the blonde to stumble slightly down the metal ramp they stood on. “Don’t worry. I’m here.”

Despite not knowing about the past he had with his father, Ren knew that Ryuji was not comfortable around alcohol. He may not have needed _protection_ necessarily, but at… At least he had someone there that he could fall back on, right? Ren was _reliable_ if nothing else. He’d always been there if Ryuji needed him.

But before Ryuji could respond, it was their turn at the door to have their identification checked. Ren already had his out, it seemed, so he handed his card over to the male at the door while Ryuji fished his own out of his wallet.

By the time hed manage to slip it from the clear pocket in his wallet, Ren had already made his way into the building. Ryuji, a bit reluctantly, handed off his card to the male in front of himself, who took it without a word. He studied the card carefully for a few moments-- most likely looking over Ryuji’s birthday and then the picture. And that’s when Ryuji spotted the man’s eyes darting to him. Oh. He had no idea that feeling of someone gazing at him so harshly would be so intimidating.

But _why_ was it intimidating? Ryuji had been looked down upon a thousand times before. Sure, it only usually happened years ago and when he was a much smaller person, but…

Well, this guy was taller than him. And he was so openly judging him…

But, still without a word, the man held out Ryuji’s card to him and motioned for him to go inside. Oh. Well, that was a lot easier than he thought it was going to be.

Ren was standing just out of the doorway and to the left, and he was at Ryuji’s side once the blond entered the room. It looked like there was just a bar around. The music was still blaring-- though much louder this time, and dozens of people were gathered around the bar. The room was filled with purple and blue lights, and some folks danced in the corner of the room while others cheered and drank and were… Generally happy.

Ryuji was determined to stick far away from the bar.

But then he felt Ren’s hand on his shoulder It made him jump, and then he felt lips at his ear. 

“Upstairs.”

 _Upstairs_ But what happened upstairs? Probably more stuff, duh. So far this place barely seemed like a club. It was so much more a bar than anything else.

But Ren tugged him towards a doorway to the side before Ryuji could ask anything about what was to be expected upstairs. 

He really should have guessed.

The staircase behind the door was narrow, and Ren refused to let go of the sleeve of Ryuji’s sweatshirt while they ascended it. The music was muffled, but Ryuji was quick to notice that there were multiple songs playing at once now. Upstairs must have a different track list. A different DJ? 

Once they’d reached the top of the stairs, ryuji was met with a short hallway. Music blared down the hall and they were presented with two choices. 

There was one room at the end of the hall. From where Ryuji stood, he could see lights flashing and it looked like one of the walls was filled with different colored changing lights. There was a stage in front of the lights, and he could see various figures dancing in different places among the strobes.

And then there was also a room to the right. The walls appeared to be purple, and the room was much brighter than the one at the end of the hall. Instead of seeing silhouettes in the room, he could make out what the people dancing looked like and what they wore-- as well as noting the plastic cups or glass bottles in their hands.

He wasn’t sure which room he was willing to go to. Which one was best? Compared to the plain black hall with what looked like sound proofing fixtures on the walls, they both looked much more interesting. 

Then again, the couple at the end of the hall making out seemed to think that this was a much better place than inside of either of the rooms. Really? Did they have to do that _here_? It was like they had no shame-- tongues shoved down each other’s throats. Ryuji had never seen anyone so determined to thoroughly check someone’s tonsils for stones since he had his taken out back when he was a kid.

It was pretty gross.

And then he felt hands on his shoulders, and Ren was leaning forward to speak into his ear. “That way.” He said, motioning to the room ahead of them. Well, at least Ryuji didn’t have to pick which room to go into. The one at the end of the hall looked more fun anyway.

When he’d spoken, Ren had to raise his voice a bit. It really didn’t suit his voice at all. He was always so soft spoken and quiet, and he sounded like he was straining to speak. Poor guy probably never yelled-- even when he came here. But how often did Ren come here? It seemed like he was at least a little bit familiar with the club.  
They wandered down the hall, and Ryuji was able to take a glimpse into the room at the right for a moment while they passed. Cramped with people dancing, he took a quick peek to spot a bar against one of the walls. There was someone running the music at the far end of the room, and… Was that a _pole_? A pole with a _stage_. 

Yeah. This place was definitely not his usual hangout. Ryuji would never step into a place like this without all of this encouragement.

Ren’s hands pressing against his back encouraged him to keep moving.

They brushed past the couple with barely any acknowledgement aside from a small (and ignored) “excuse me” from Ren before wandering into the room at the end of the hall.

Immediately the music became louder as Ryuji stepped into the room. He glanced around. A small stage to the right with the music booth at the far end, a bar to his immediate right, and the stage with the wall of lights to the front. 

The music was almost deafeningly loud-- so loud that Ryuji couldn’t hear the shattering of a beer bottle that was dropped just a few feet away from himself by a stumbling dancer. If he hadn’t watched it happen, he likely wouldn’t have even noticed.

A female ran from the scene in front of Ryuji and to the bar, and the blonde hoped that she was informing the bartender about the spill so someone could come clean it up.

Overall, it wasn’t… Bad. No one was bothering him (yet), and the blaring music was at least decent. It had the crowd dancing, and Ryuji swore that some of them sang along by the looks of the movements of their lips. 

But before he knew it, Ren was in front of him and dragging him by the arm to the dance floor. Right to business, huh? Though they’d wasted enough time as it was already.

They stepped up onto the dance floor and to a more open area along the edge of the stage. If it weren’t for Ren tugging Ryuji to stand farther onto the stage, then he would have been afraid that he’d end up falling off the stage. It was only a few inches off of the ground, but it was still enough for a tumble or two.

Ren was kind enough to take the edge of the stage though.

So now what? Did they just… Dance? Ryuji supposed. He was already bobbing his head and tapping his foot to the music. Ren didn’t let go of his hand though, instead holding it up in the air as he shook his hips in time to the music.

It was ridiculous, really. Ryuji never expected Ren to be the kind of guy to dance like this. In fact, he never expected Ren to like dancing to begin with. He looked silly though, grabbing onto Ryuji’s hands and urging them into the air as he shook his hips and tapped his feet.

It had Ryuji chuckling, and he spotted a grin upon the black haired male’s lips. If this was a night about loosening up, Ryuji was sure it would work out.

No one seemed overly drunk. No one gave them trouble. No one looked at them strangely. They could be themselves here, right? Dancing and hanging out. Friends did that.

Right?

And then Ren let go of Ryuji’s hands and danced by himself for a few moments. He sure did like shaking his hips, huh?

His feet tapped along the hardwood floor of the stage, and Ryuji felt it bumping from the other patrons dancing.

He decided to give spinning a shot-- and he did, arms in the air as he attempted to shake his hips half as viciously as his neighbor did his own. Ren seemed pleased though, dancing in his own little area. For a few moments a female decided she’d join them, shouting with joy so loudly that Ryuji heard her voice over the sound of the music.

But it seemed she was just passing through while trying to have a bit of fun. She stepped between Ren and Ryuji, turning to face the blonde to dance with him for a few moments. She shook her hips as wildly as Ren had been doing, the drink in her hand spilling just the smallest amount. She had one hand in the air and she was so close to Ryuji that he could feel her body bump against his.

She was short and pretty cute though. A round face, and a cute little button nose. She wasn’t exactly his _type_, but she certainly seemed like a lot of fun. Even if she was drunk.

She was just looking for a good time, right? And she wasn’t being violent in the slightest…

Behind her, Ryuji spotted Ren slipping cash into the hand of a shirtless male-- a _waiter_ with a tray of… What looked like small glass vials on top. The man gladly took the money and Ren grabbed one of the vials from the tray.

And then he took the female in front of Ryuji’s free hand, grabbing it with one hand while the other slipped whatever that thing was into it. The woman seemed confused for a moment, but then she cheered again and finally slipped away, her gold dress shimmering in the strobe lights that spun around the room.

It looked like Ren had gotten tired of her and found an excuse to try and get her to finally go. Ryuji wasn’t complaining. He’d come here for _Ren_ , right?

Huh. Weird. Usually he’d be more concerned about all of the cute girls around…

The memories of his discussion with Haru and Futaba earlier crossed his mind, and he frowned for a moment. Ren seemed to catch on immediately though, stepping closer and placing a hand on the blonde’s shoulder.

“You doing all right?” He asked-- shouting loud enough for Ryuji to (hopefully) hear over the blare of the music. Ryuji couldn’t quite hear him correctly, but that was what he assumed Ren had asked. Given the circumstances, it made sense, right?

“Yeah!” He said with a nod to verify his answer. There was no need to dwell on a time like that. Not now. It was something he’d think about when he was alone-- when he wouldn’t worry Ren like this.

Speaking of, Ren seemed skeptical when he pulled away from Ryuji. He’d leaned in closer so that they could speak a little easier, but now it felt like he was being… Judged. Ren’s eyes darted across his face for any hint that Ryuji was lying-- he could _feel_ it. It made Ryuji’s lips form into a thin line, and he shrunk back slightly.

But his neighbor seemed satisfied after that, leaning in close once again. “I’ll get us drinks!”

A drink sounded good. Ryuji’s mouth had gotten pretty dry while they were dancing, and he could use a little refresher. It was incredibly hot in the club too. With all of the people dancing, it was no wonder.

He nodded again, and then he watched Ren disappear through the crowd in the direction of the bar. And then Ryuji was… Alone.

What was he supposed to do alone? Dance by himself? Would that look lame? What about dancing with someone else? Abandon Ren for another patron?

For some reason Ryuji didn’t think Ren would appreciate that.

Thankfully Ren returned pretty quickly though. He had two drinks in hand-- a bottle of beer in one and a plastic cup with a dark liquid in the other. He’d had to turn sideways with his arms in the air to keep from getting too tangled in the crowd and he seemed to have a bit of trouble, but he’d made his way back to Ryuji with minimal issues.

He held out the plastic cup towards Ryuji while he took a sip from the bottle of beer. Skeptical, Ryuji took the cup and looked at the sloshing liquid inside, eyebrow raised. 

And then Ren leaned in close once again, a smile on his lips. “Rum and Coke. Heavy on the Coke.”

Ryuji wasn’t really looking forward to the prospect of drinking alcohol for the first time in his life, but… It wouldn’t hurt to try, right? Today was his day to try and loosen up a bit.

He tipped the cup back against his lips and took a small test sip. It wasn’t _bad_ , but it wasn’t _good_ either. It was sweet. Overall, it tasted like normal Cola, but with a burn that Ryuji had heard came from the taste of alcohol.

It was, more or less, _okay_.

Ren took another sip of his beer though, while Ryuji attempted to enjoy his drink as well. But something was bothering him. A certain _need_. 

Holding his cup out towards Ren, Ryuji leaned closer to him so that he could speak more easily. “Gotta whiz.” He said.

Ren only nodded in response, taking the cup from Ryuji and pointing in a vague direction towards the opposite end of the bar. Probably the bathrooms, huh? Ryuji nodded a thanks before slipping through the crowd.

Raising his arms and turning sideways much like Ren had earlier, Ryuji made his way across the dance floor and around the dancing patrons. He regretted it almost immediately-- it probably would have been better (and easier) to not travel through the dance floor, but turning back now would make him look goofy. There was no turning back. Full throttle. Go through with your decisions, right? No matter how poor they were.

Eventually he made his way through the crowd and off of the stage. There was a doorway to the side of the bar, and Ryuji noticed a few tall tables standing around as well. Through the door must have been the bathroom though. 

He slipped into a small hallway with two doors at it again. Ahead seemed to be another entrance to the second dance room, and to the right was the bathroom. Great. Though there was only one bathroom and it lacked a door. Unisex? Meh. Ryuji didn’t mind.

It’s not like people typically watched others pee anyway.

Though as he entered the bathroom, he spotted a small group of girls standing near the doorway. He attempted to slip past them, but to no avail. One of them turned to greet him, grabbing onto the front of his sweatshirt and looking him up and down. If Ryuji didn’t know any better, he’d say it was the same woman as earlier…

And then he spotted it. That cute little nose. It _was_ her.

“Hey!” She said, a pout on her lips as she looked up at Ryuji.

Oh no. What was he getting stuck with now? If she caused trouble, Ryuji was going to bolt out of there faster than he’d ever run. Aching leg be damned, he was going to sprint the entire way ho-”

“Who is he?” She asked.

 _He_? Who was she talking about?

“Wh-”

“That guy! That guy you’re with!” She said. Her tone wasn’t _threatening_ exactly. Maybe more… Demanding? “He treats you good! Right?”

What?

“He’s, uh… He’s a _friend_.” Why did everyone think that he and Ren were something more? Then again, they _were_ at a gay club. It would make sense that they were something more… Right? But they _weren’t_.

“He’s cute.” She said, shoving Ryuji slightly as she let go of his jacket.

“Uh… Yeah. He is.”

“But you’re cuter. You have a nice face. A sexy body. Show it off! Your ass looks great in those jeans!” She smiled for a moment, looking Ryuji up and down.

“Oh, uh… Thanks. Thanks a lot.” Wow. Someone was checking him out like that? And she thought he was better looking than _Ren_? That was… Honestly, shocking.

“ _Listen,_ ” she began, pressing closer to Ryuji. He took a step back, but she was still making her way closer to him, her finger then jabbing at his chest. “You’re beautiful. You’re gorgeous. A _goddess_. You hear me? You go back out there. You pull him close and you look him in the eyes while you ride the shit out of him tonight. You fuck him so good he’ll beg you for more. Make him bow down and kiss your feet. You got that?”

Um.

Ryuji _really_ needed some help. He needed an escape. Where was Ren when he needed him?

An escape. What could he-- _the bathroom_.

“Thanks, but I’m just tryin’ to… To pee.” He said, jabbing a thumb behind his back and towards the urinals.

“You’re too good for him, you hear?” The female asked. She was pouting again. Was this really supposed to be a motivational speech? It was only making him feel uncomfortable. Ryuji had no plans to _”ride the shit_ ” out of Ren tonight-- or _ever_ , for that matter…

“Uh, thanks…” Ryuji said as he turned. He shrunk down a little as he made his way to the urinals, but the female didn’t seem to want to let him go alone. 

She strode up behind him, throwing her arms around his shoulders from behind and gave him a very strange feeling hug. It was pretty uncomfortable, and Ryuji had to lean back slightly. Why was she following him like this? He only wanted to go to the bathroom in peace.

“Don’t you _ever_ let him make you think that you’re not better than him. Make him _worship_ you.” 

“Yeah, I’ll, uh… I’ll do that.” Why wouldn’t she just _leave_? Ryuji really had to go to the bathroom, and he couldn’t just drop his pants in front of her like that.

Well, he _could_ , but that would be rude.

Thankfully one of the other ladies in the doorway called out a name, and the girl gave the back of Ryuji’s arm a gentle punch. “I mean it! You’re a _snack_ , and you better let him eat the hell out of you!” She said before she trotted off.

 _Thank goodness_.

Hopefully he could get out of here before she got distracted by him again. Ryuji quickly went about doing his business, but one of the stalls caught his gaze. Why he decided to look, he had no idea, but he took a peek beneath the door to spot… Two pairs of feet. A set of sneakers and some strappy heels, and just then he noticed the faint sounds of slapping and moaning could be heard.

He felt his face heat up, and he was quick to finish up, wash his hands, and sneak past his new friend in the doorway to get back to Ren.

It didn’t take him long to find his neighbor-- he hadn’t dwelled away from his previous location. He was dancing alone though, and upon spotting Ryuji again, he thrust the blonde’s drink back into his hand, the grabbing the free one to hold up in the air to dance with.

Huh. Maybe Ren wasn’t so bad at dancing. He had some pretty good moves, and he was eager to get Ryuji to join along. Lifting their arms, Ren gave the blonde a quick spin, and Ryuji stumbled a bit as he attempted to be graceful. It didn’t seem to work though, but it had him chuckling a little at his own clumsiness. 

Ren was almost finished with his drink, Ryuji noticed as he went to take another sip. Perhaps he was starting to loosen up more. He seemed like he was having a lot of fun.

And then Ren let go of his hand, hopping off of the dance floor and… Onto the stage? The one with the lights behind it. 

The stage was surprisingly barren for an area that looked so cool with different patterns flashing on the wall behind it. Ryuji could barely make out how Ren looked while he was up there, but he watched as the black haired male’s silhouette danced-- arms in the air and swaying and bouncing to the beat.

He spun and danced, and Ryuji found himself falling to a halt. 

Seeing Ren like this? It was _different_. It wasn’t strange at all, but… 

It felt like Ren was himself. 

He looked so at home and so comfortable with his movements. Ren was never scared. He was never worried or weak or anything. Not even when Ryuji had found him in that alley had the blonde thought of him as anything but strong.

Ren was confident, charming, and like his new friend had noted, Ren was _cute_. Maybe _more_ than cute.

He was handsome. Hot. Sexy.

And the more he thought about it, the more Ryuji found his heart aching. He wanted to be with Ren more. He wanted to hang out with him, spend time with him--

 _Kiss him_.

There was nothing Ryuji wanted more than to kiss his neighbor in that moment. The thought frightened him more than anything ever before. Ren was mysterious, terrifying, and _dangerous_.

But he was also Ryuji’s best friend. He was kind, sweet, gentle, and utterly endless.

Maybe he _did_ have a crush on him.

But Ryuji was terrified to admit that maybe-- just _maybe_ it was something more than just a simple crush.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The scene of Ren dancing in front of the lights was probably the very first scene I ever planned out for this story. I hope you're all happy with how Ryuji is finally coming to his senses! The burn is so slow, and I just want them to be happy together too! Too bad I still have quite a bit planned for this story!
> 
> Have a great day!
> 
> Oh! And if you haven't yet, you should totally join the Pegoryu Discord! It's wild in there, and you get to have previews of this story on the occasion! ;D Let me know if you'd like a link!
> 
> Speaking of, I'd like to thank all of my buddies in the Pegoryu Discord! They helped motivate me and let me complain endlessly about this chapter taking so long to write. Without them, it would have taken so much longer to write this thing. And also there would be no drunk girl talking to Ryuji. Thank you guys! You're the best!


	23. Feelings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if this chapter seems long and boring! But I thought it was necessary...
> 
> Enjoy!

It had been a few days since they’d gone to the club. Ryuji had been thinking-- _hard_ about his feelings for Ren, and… It was frustrating. It was frustrating and tough and confusing. Why did feelings have to be so weird? He hated them. He hated them with every fiber of his being.

His feelings had been nothing but a distraction since that day. And it seemed like he wasn’t the only one who noticed.

Hifumi was watching him with careful eyes over the small table Ryuji used to sit at to eat his meals. It was just a tiny old thing he’d picked up at a thrift shop, and he’d managed to purchase a couple of chairs at some big retail store. Maybe it wasn’t the best thing in the world, but the coffee rings (courtesy of it’s previous owner as well as Ren) and residue of stickers added some charm to it, right?

Maybe Ryuji shouldn’t trust himself with scrapbooking anymore. Those stickers really made a mess of things around the house…

“Something is bothering you.” He heard the woman across the table from himself mutter as she moved one of the pieces across the board between them. Damn. He was stuck again, huh? Hifumi was really kicking his ass today…

And then Hifumi continued speaking as she began resetting the pieces on the shogi board. She was no longer looking at Ryuji while she worked.

“You’re making beginner’s mistakes.” She commented, her gaze only flickering to Ryuji for a moment. It caused him to shrink back in his seat a little bit. Gosh, her gaze was intimidating… “What’s on your mind?”

Of course she knew something was up. Usually Ryuji stood at least some sort of a chance against the female when they played shogi together, but he must have lost four games in a row by now. And it didn’t take him long to throw in the towel either. 

Not to mention she’d only gotten there maybe an hour beforehand.

And they only did play four games that day…

To say that he was distracted was an understatement. But Ryuji did feel bad for turning Hifumi down a few times in the most recent days. He liked her a lot! And they hadn’t seen each other in a while… 

She had some great pointers for shogi too, though Ryuji had to admit that it was strange for them both to be playing in such silence. Usually they spoke a lot during their sessions.

“I’m just…” He paused, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. How was he supposed to admit anything? Did he trust Hifumi? Of course! But was she really the person he should be talking about this with? She never talked about relationships or anything. Sure, she talked about Ren and about other mutual friends, but like this? “I just got a lot on my mind.”

Was she someone he should seek advice from?

She was probably a lot better than any of Ryuji’s other options.

“Like what?” She was frowning then, pausing in setting up the board to look at Ryuji. He ld one piece in her hand-- the Gold piece.

Ryuji felt himself shrug after that. Even though Hifumi was his friend, he still wasn’t sure if he could completely open up or not. No offense against her, but Ryuji was still figuring out his own feelings.

Then again, it was likely she could help.

“Just… Stuff. I’ve been thinking about someone, and-”

“This is about Ren, isn’t it?”

_How_? How could she guess that?! Ryuji had barely gotten anything out of his mouth!

And then Hifumi chuckled, covering her mouth with one hand. “Judging by the look on your face, I’d say I hit the nail on the head.”

Was he making a face? If she said he was, then he probably was… Damn. How was he so bad at hiding stuff from people?

Slumping down in his seat, Ryuji just huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. “Yeah, yeah. It’s about Ren.”

Hifumi placed down the shogi piece into it’s correct location before folding her arms onto the table, looming over it slightly as she looked at Ryuji. Her smile softened as she sighed. “What about him?” Her voice was as soft as ever (Aside from the moments when she played shogi. She could get pretty intense.).

“I was just thinkin’-- I don’t know!” Ryuji reached out, picking up one of his pawns and moving it on the board. Maybe he could calm down a little bit by playing. “About him an’ me.”

“Mhmm.” Hifumi rested her chin in one of her hands as she looked to the board, moving a piece of her own. “What about the two of you?”

“Well, I don’t know.”

He sure didn’t know a lot, did he?

Hifumi’s gaze traced to Ryuji once again as he moved one of his pieces. “Well, what _do_ you know?”

“I know that I’m confused.” That was a good place to start, right? But that was obvious, wasn’t it? He’d been rambling about that for the past few minutes.

But Hifumi just hummed, a small pout on her face. “It’s a start. But I’ll need you to elaborate. What about Ren has you confused?”

Elaboration. Of course. 

Slumping in his seat once again, Ryuji draped his arms over the table. It seemed like shogi was going to be forgotten for a little bit, huh? Or just for the rest of the day. However, he was sure that he really wasn’t all that great to play with in his current state. Being so distracted? There was no way Hifumi was having any fun.

This wasn’t a challenge for her at all. And she _loved_ a good challenge-- Ryuji had learned that much about her, at least.

Nt to mention it was her turn, and if she wasn’t going to make a move, then Ryuji couldn’t continue with it either.

Maybe he could… Admit a few things to her. She was his friend. She’d understand, right? And back when they first met, Ren had made it clear there was nothing between the two of them, so… There was no reason for Hifumi to feel upset about it, right?

“We went to a club the other day.” He began, his finger drawing gentle circles atop the table. “We were just tryin’ to have a good time, and I guess… I guess I came to my senses about somethin’.”

“Oh?” Hifumi’s interest seemed piqued. “Like what?” Her eyes widened as she looked at Ryuji, her chin coming from behind her fingers as she sat up, laying her hands into her lap.

And then Ryuji sighed. He wasn’t used to talking about this kind of stuff. He hadn’t had a girlfriend in a really long time, and he also hadn’t had a crush like this on someone in so long. It was… Unusual.

“Uh…” He paused after that, unsure of how to word it. “I think I like him. A lot. I mean, I think I _like_ him.”

Was that really the way an adult would speak about how they were romantically interested in someone? 

Probably not.

His gaze was focused on the table though-- too embarrassed to look up at the female across the table from himself. He wasn’t sure what her reaction would be, but… Well, it couldn’t be bad. He had to keep telling himself that.

And then something he didn’t expect to hear happened.

Hifumi chuckled. And he glanced up to her to see her covering her mouth with one hand. Oh. So she thought it was funny? But… He wasn’t expecting her to have that sort of reaction.

Her laugh was adorable though. It was the first time Ryuji had ever heard it. Gosh, everything about Hifumi was so pretty. 

But then she shook her head as if she was exasperated, her hand falling to her lap again. “Really?” She asked, gaze tracing to Ryuji’s face.

He felt himself flush.

“Ryuji, I assumed you already knew.”

What? Wait. But _Hifumi_ knew? She knew his feelings? Just… Just like that? But _how_?

Ryuji felt his face heat up a bit more, and he pouted, looking down at the shogi board. He was glaring holes into the damn thing. Was it really that obvious? But how hadn’t Ryuji known? If everyone else could see, but not him…

Well, that was assuming more than just Hifumi knew

But then she leaned on the table again, her hand in her chin once more. The sudden movement caught Ryuji’s eye.

“But you didn’t. So now that you do know, you’re unsure of what to do about your feelings.”

She was right. She really was. And Ryuji could only sigh.

A silence fell over the duo, and Hifumi finally decided to take her turn in shogi. She moved one of her pieces and captured one of his own. Ugh. A beginner’s mistake once again.

Then again, sometimes you had to sacrifice a piece or two in order to win.

It was quiet for a while. Ryuji took his turn. Hifumi took hers. It remained like that for a while, the two more focused on the board than anything else. And Ryuji felt as if he could focus a bit more at the task before himself. He was determined to win.

However, as he was placing down a tile, Hifumi spoke again.

“You should tell him.”

It stunned Ryuji, and he dropped his piece to the board. It clattered against the wood lightly just a couple of times, and then the room was silent for a moment.

“A-are you crazy?!” Ryuji heard himself say. It shot from his mouth so quickly that he didn’t even feel it. But there was no doubt that the sound had come from him.

Hifumi looked to him with a small frown on her lips. “What have you got to lose?”

Oh. Well… What _did_ he have to lose? 

He could only think of one thing.

“I don’t know-- his _friendship_?!” It was a legitimate concern, right? What if Ren didn’t feel the same? What if he wasn’t comfortable with it after knowing Ryuji’s feelings? Honestly, Ren was his best friend. He couldn’t risk losing that.

“Don’t you think you would know Ren better by now?”

Huh?

Ryuji blinked, frowning. 

Know Ren better than that? But… Well… He _did_ know Ren well… Didn’t he?

If he _did_ , he would know that Ren wasn’t the type of guy to just abandon someone because of a crush. 

Yeah, that was how he would explain it. Even if what he was feeling was more, Ryuji would just consider it a crush.

And he thought about Hifumi’s words. He thought about them through multiple more rounds of getting his ass whooped, and he thought about them as he bid the female a goodbye when she expressed her need to leave. An early morning, she reasoned.

He was inclined to believe her.

Her goodbye was short and sweet and he was forced into promising that he would text her at some point the next day. 

But now that he was alone, Ryuji moved to his bed and sat down, elbows on his knees and sighing.

Should he tell Ren? He’d just come to terms with his feelings, so he wasn’t one-hundred percent sure of anything himself. 

But what could it hurt? Hifumi was right. Ren wouldn’t just push him away or anything!

He was the kindest, sweetest, smartest, bravest guy Ryuji knew!

He was intelligent, confident, handsome, and mysterious, and ugh. Ryuji’s head was reeling.

He was confused. Frustrated. Exhausted. And usually in times like this, he found himself texting Ren or dropping by his apartment. 

That was a good idea, right? Well, Ren was the one giving him trouble, but maybe hanging out with him a little bit would help Ryuji either come to a conclusion or forget about it a little. Clearing his mind sounded really good, actually.

And it was still early. Maybe Ren would feel up to playing a videogame or something. He seemed more into card games though. The guy was crazy good at them. Yuuki had been right about that.

But anything really sounded better than sitting on his bed by himself.

Ryuji stood, stuffing his hands into his pockets. Long ago had the two stopped bothering to text each other when they were busy. Why wait for an immediate answer when you could just show up at each other’s house? It was a short walk, and it probably took about the same amount of time as shooting a text.

Slipping on an old and ratty pair of sneakers without bothering to tie the laces, Ryuji slipped through the door after grabbing his keys. He locked the door and then head for the steps, pushing open the fire proof door and wandering into the dimly lit stairs. 

He contemplated taking the elevator, but it seemed like it would be even more of a waste of time. There was no telling what floor the damn thing was on, and some days it moved slower than the dickens. 

It was so old that sometimes Ryuji wondered how it was still working.

He found himself waddling down the steps without bothering to use the handrail. No, his hands were more occupied with the insides of the pockets of his sweatshirt. It was pretty chilly in the apartment building-- with the drafty windows and everyone keeping their heat low to save money, it was no surprise. And was there heat running in the main building? Ryuji doubted it. 

Winters in this place sucked.

But the halls were a thousand times better than the stairs. Ryuji was reminded of that when he stepped out into the seventh floor’s hall. But something didn’t seem right. Immediately after leaving the stairs, Ryuji could hear yelling. It was as if an argument was going on in one of the apartments on the floor. Oh. That couldn’t be good.

But the closer he got to Ren’s apartment, the more apparent it was that it was coming from his place. Weird. He hadn’t heard anything going on upstairs. Maybe it’d just started? Either way, it was weird. It didn’t sound like Ren’s voice at all.

No, it wasn’t as deep as Ren’s voice. But whoever it was sounded angry. Stepping up to the door, Ryuji paused to listen in. Sure, it was probably the wrong thing to do. But Ryuji was curious. No one had ever seemed more than just annoyed by his neighbor. What happened that someone was now _yelling_ around him?

“You’re not just endangering yourself, you know!” He heard, and Ryuji found himself raising an eyebrow. Danger? What sort of danger _was_ there? And who was Ren endangering aside from himself? He was a normal guy…

And that was assuming that whoever was yelling was directing their anger towards the black haired male. If they were speaking about someone else, then Ryuji wondered who. 

“It’s _dangerous_! It’s always _been_ dangerous! Amamiya, you’re putting _him_ at risk too!”

_Amamiya_? That was Ren’s last name… So he _was_ the one who the anger was directed to. But who was this other guy talking about? 

Ryuji pressed his ear against the door, fingertips brushing the wood gently. Maybe he could get as much of a hint about this conversation as he could. 

Eavesdropping may be bad, but color him curious. He was learning a lot more about Ren from this one conversation than he’d ever heard out of his neighbor’s mouth. Everything else had just been self discovery through hanging out with him. 

Ren’s friends were a lot more helpful in learning about him than he was. 

But was this guy a friend? Because of his tone, Ryuji would say he wasn’t. But his words were… Well, he would assume that only someone who cared would be concerned about someone’s safety. Then again, he seemed more concerned about someone else rather than Ren. 

Ryuji could hear someone else mutter something-- he assumed it’d been Ren. It was much quieter than this new male’s voice, so Ryuji couldn’t quite make out what he was saying. But then the yelling started again. 

“ _Think of someone else for once!_ ” 

Something about that sentence sent fire throughout Ryuji. 

_Think of someone else for once?_ But wasn’t that what Ren _always_ did? He was always smiling. Always offering help. He was always there to lend an ear to. He was sweet, kind… He always made sure Ryuji was happy and fed regardless of his own situations. When it was cold, he brought Ryuji blankets. When it was raining, he reminded him to bring an umbrella to work. 

Ren was the least selfish person he’d ever met. How _dare_ someone think otherwise? 

Where he had come to Ren’s apartment hoping for some relief, it was only causing more stress to him. In fact, he was pretty damn angry. 

Who was this guy, and what gave him the right to talk to Ren like that?! 

Without thinking, Ryuji reached out and grabbed for the door handle. Thankfully, as he twisted the doorknob, he found that it was unlocked. Had he tried to walk into a locked door, it would have ruined his entrance and probably only made him angrier. 

“H-hey!” 

But the door swung open as he thrust himself inside. Standing in the doorway, he looked about the room. Ren was leaned back against the couch with crossed arms over his chest, and the other male in question was stood with his back to Ryuji. Long brunette hair and an accusatory finger jabbed in Ren’s direction, Ryuji was to assume that regardless if anyone else was in the apartment, he was likely to be the one yelling. 

However, upon Ryuji’s sudden entrance, both males looked in the blonde’s direction. Their eyes were wide set and Ryuji found himself growing slightly… _Insecure_. 

_In his haste, he hadn’t planned this far ahead._

Still, it was apparent that it was Ren’s turn to be saved. He’d done a hell of a lot for Ryuji. It was about time he repayed the favor, right? 

Storming into the apartment, Ryuji made his way over to Ren. It was a good start, right? He stood in front of the brunette and between him and Ren, shoving a pointed finger in his direction. 

“You can’t talk to him like that!” Well, that really didn’t sound convincing. In fact, Ryuji felt like he was a toddler lecturing a bigger kid about his bullying. Hopefully he appeared more confident than his words would ever make him seem. 

The male looked from Ryuji back to Ren, a scowl crossing his face. “This him?” 

_Him_? Oh right. Ren apparently talked about him a lot. So it was no surprise that this guy knew about him. But if they were friends, he really shouldn’t have been yelling at Ren like this. In Ryuji’s eyes, it was completely uncalled for. Why not just discuss things like adults? 

And another thing; why was he ignoring Ryuji?! That was rude! 

Looking back Ren in time to see him nod, Ryuji then turned to face the new male again, hands on his hips. Regardless of the situation, he wasn’t going to let this guy ignore him! “Hey! I’m talking to you! 

The male then sighed, reaching to his neck and fixing the tie he had there, his eyes falling closed. It was as if he was trying to make himself appear more proper-- like his anger earlier had caused him to mess up his appearance. 

It probably had. 

“My apologies. My actions were uncalled for.” His words were calm, but there was an underlying fury in them. He was still pissed. Ryuji could feel it. But at least he was acting calmly. His demeanor had changed completely, and he’d even dared to allow a smile onto his face. 

Ugh. It made Ryuji feel sick. 

“However,” he continued, looking to Ryuji, his frown returning. “My feelings are warranted. You see, Ren-” 

“ _Goro_.” It was Ren’s voice from behind himself. Dark and cold as ice, Ryuji didn’t dare look back at his neighbor. For some reason he felt that he wouldn’t appreciate what he saw. Ren’s voice was _dangerous_. Ryuji recognized his tone as the same he’d taken with Iwai when he... 

_When he was about to share too much._

Shoulders falling as scowl softening, Ryuji’s mouth hung open slightly. This had been his chance to learn something about Ren. He couldn’t just… Let Ren hide himself more. Why was he always trying to hide things from him? 

But the brunette-- Goro if he were to guess his name, cleared his throat after sparing a moment’s glance over Ryuji’s shoulder at Ren. He moved over to the bed and picked up what looked like a jacket laying on top of it. A suit jacket maybe? The guy looked like he’d just come from work. 

He draped the jacket over his arm, and then looked back to the duo, hand reaching up to tug at his tie again. He’d barely moved. What was he concerned about messing up? 

But he did seem a lot more calm than before. Maybe Ryuji had come in at the right moment to diffuse the situation. If so, that’d be a huge relief. 

“Think about what I said, _Ren_.” He said as he looked between the both of them. His words were slick with venom as deadly as Ren’s had been moments before. He allowed himself to smile again after that though, waving his free hand in their direction. “Well! If that’s that, then I’ll see you for coffee in the morning!” 

He was gone in a flash, and Ryuji frowned. This guy’s mood flipped almost as quickly as Ren’s. It was just as terrifying, too… But a soft sniffle from behind himself caught his attention more than the actions of the brunette. 

A sniffle? Was Ren _crying_? 

Spinning to face his neighbor, Ryuji saw him pull a hand to his hand to cough into. Oh. Maybe not. Maybe he was just… Sick. 

Ren’s gaze was on the ground though, and Ryuji reached out to pat his shoulder. 

“H-hey. You okay, man?” He asked. 

Ren only looked up at him with a smile plastered on his face. It was the most sickeningly fake one Ryuji had ever seen, but… Maybe it was best not to push it. 

“I’m fine.” Ren stated before he coughed into his hand again. “I’m just not feeling the best.” 

So he _was_ sick. 

Eyebrows furrowed and demeanor drooping, Ryuji let a smile of his own spread onto his lips, though it was weak. He knew that Ren wasn’t feeling all that great, but prying had always proved to push him away more. 

“Come on, dude.” He found himself saying. “Let’s go get you some medicine.” 

Regardless of whether he or Ren had any around the house, something that always cheered Ren up was a nice long walk. And he really seemed like he needed one. 


	24. Fresh Air

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this took so long to get out here! Pegoryu week stuff has been keeping me occupied, and I did take a little bit of a break!
> 
> Which means the Sims has been calling to me again.
> 
> Enjoy!

It was only the early evening, but the sun had already set long ago. Ryuji had made sure that Ren was bundled up nicely-- forcing him to wear an old pair of Ryuji’s gloves that he’d managed to find deep in the depths of his closet despite his protests. A scarf was wrapped around his neck and a hat over his head. All upon Ruyji’s insistence. Ren had put up a fight about all of the items, but all of his words fell on deaf ears. He was sick, and he absolutely _needed_ to make sure that he stayed dressed warmly. Cold or not, Ryuji wasn’t going to let Ren feel worse.

Unfortunately, that left Ryuji to only his jacket with the hood pulled over his head. Oh well. Ren needed the warmth more than him anyway. The poor guy was sniffling up a storm, and Ryuji had caught on to a fever he seemed to have when he was pulling his hat over his neighbor’s head.

Poor guy was flushed and pale all at the same. He really wasn’t looking so hot. It was surprising what a few days apart could do to make a guy look so different, huh?

Ren was a trooper though. He was out and walking alongside Ryuji on the cold. 

“Hey, let me know if it’s too much, ‘kay?” Ryuji asked as they walked, reaching out and patting Ren’s shoulder gently. 

He was cold himself, so he could understand if Ren was finding it difficult to cope. Snow was gently falling from the sky, and it probably helped warm things up just a little bit (snow was a great insulator! Though it was still freezing), but it was still far too cold for the blonde’s liking. If they had to duck into a store or something, there was no way Ryuji would complain about it.

In fact, he’d probably encourage it more. If it wasn’t for wanting Ren out of the cold sooner rather than later, that was. 

Maybe a walk was a shitty idea. But walks always seemed to brighten Ren’s mood. He was always the kind of guy that hated to be stuck in the house. He liked to be able to go out, meet with people, socialize. For someone who insisted on pushing other people away so much, he sure didn’t like to seclude himself.

Independent, but lonely. That’s how Ryuji could describe him.

He was the perfect guy to hang out at home with and do nothing together. He just liked company while simultaneously doing his own thing.

He was like a cat, huh?

Speaking of cats though, Ryuji wondered where Morgana had been during that fight earlier. Goro had gotten pretty loud, so maybe he’d been stuck hiding somewhere. Poor cat. Ryuji would try to pick him up some snacks at the pharmacy though.

First, he decided, they should head to Tae’s clinic though. She could at least make a recommendation for what to give Ren, right? It may have just been a cold, but doctors knew best. Maybe she could prescribe something cheap but effective. And then Ryuji could buy it for Ren! Perfect!

“I’m fine.” Ren didn’t particularly _look_ fine though. A little gloomy and huddled into the scarf around his neck, but he didn’t look _terrible_ either. 

Ryuji decided not to push it. It wasn’t much farther to Takemi Clinic anyway.

He’d seen the office a couple of times while walking around this area of the city. It wasn’t too far from his apartment, and the pharmacy wasn’t too much farther in the same direction. It would be nice to get out of the cold soon though.

And it’d be also nice to get something to help Ren. Ryuji assumed that he didn’t much take care of himself-- if he had the lack of any content in his neighbor’s refrigerator to go by. 

Upon getting to the clinic and walking up the few stairs, Ryuji held the door open for Ren. The bell above the door jingled slightly to notify Tae of their visit.

Ren hadn’t questioned Ryuji where they were going the entire time he’d been forced to get ready, or during their walk. Ryuji assumed it had been because he was sure that Ryuji knew where to get medicine or just wanted to get him out of the house for a little, but he did follow the blonde obediently into the office. 

Ryuji appreciated not having to answer questions, but he did wish that Ren asked them. Trust or not, he wanted Ren to be curious about what he was planning. Then again, his mind was probably off in other places still.

Once they’d gotten into the office, Ryuji looked around. Oh. There was a very small waiting room on the right side and on the left was the counter. A door ahead had Ryuji assuming that it was the direction into the back room.

No one was sitting at the counter though, but Ryuji felt it best to direct his neighbor over there. Holding onto Ren’s shoulders from behind him, Ryuji pushed his neighbor towards the counter just as Tae appeared in the doorway behind it.

“Good eveni- oh.” She muttered upon spotting the duo. There was a curious pout upon her face as she looked between them.

Ryuji decided to speak first. “Hey!” He said, letting go of Ren and leaning on the counter. Ren stood beside him, hands shoved into the pockets of his jacket, and from the corner of his eye, Ryuji could see that his neighbor was more interested in the counter than he was in looking at the doctor. Poor guy was probably a little embarrassed or something.

“S’been a while!” Ryuji said as he leaned on top of the counter comfortably.He kicked one leg up, foot tapping on the ground a couple of times.

“Indeed it _has_ been.” Tae muttered as she looked from Ryuji to Ren, one eyebrow raising. “How are you both?” Still, her gaze was fixated on Ren. It seemed she was pretty concerned about him, huh? Ryuji couldn’t blame her. Ren looked like shit. But she glanced back to the blonde once he spoke again.

“Poor guy’s sick. Think ya can help us out?” He asked, shoving a thumb in his neighbor’s direction.

As if on cue, Ren let out a cough, a balled up fist covering his mouth as he did.

A smile-- no, a _smirk_ weaved onto Tae’s face, and she tapped the clipboard in her hand against the counter. “Of course. Right this way.” She then motioned to the door to the boys’ right before disappearing back into the doorway.

Putting his hand on Ren’s back, Ryuji guided his neighbor towards the door just in time for Tae to pull the door open and motion for them to enter.

They wandered down a small hallway-- white walls and speckled flooring the entire way. There were a few pictures hanging up of people who looked a little _overly_ happy to be in a doctor’s office, but… Well, that was a staple for medical facilities, wasn’t it? Tae didn’t see like the type to enjoy them much. Ryuji didn’t question it.

They were lead into a small examination room. And by _small_ , Ryuji meant that it was pretty cramped. There was enough room for a small counter with a chair, a bed, and, well… The doorway. 

Ryuji chose to stand as close to the door after it’d been closed as possible. Didn’t want to overwhelm the duo. But Ren made his way to the small dull-mint colored bed. He sat down on the edge of it, fingers slowly tugging at the scarf around his neck to pull it off. It was almost painful to see him so dejected and so slow in his movements. Sure, he was normally slow, but this was almost excruciating to watch.

Tae seemed to think so as well. She tapped her foot on the ground, though she didn’t bother to say anything. Ryuji decided to be the brave one though.

Crossing the room to the small bed, Ryuji reached out. “Let me help you.” He said calmly. Even from his position facing away from the doctor, he could feel her eyes on him as he unwrapped the scarf from Ren’s neck. His cheeks tinted pink, and he was thankful that Ren wasn’t watching him as well. He didn’t want him to notice it. But after the scarf was off, Ryuji folded it and then laid it onto the bed beside his neighbor. Next were the gloves, and then Ryuji folded the jacket over his arm before stepping off to the side so that Ren could be examined. Hopefully he didn’t mind Ryuji sitting in and watching while Tae worked. He didn’t say anything, but Ryuji was sure that he was a bit embarrassed as well.

Ryuji had just undressed him like a mother would her child, after all.

Tae scoot forward in her seat, slipping a stethoscope into her ears before slipping one end under Ren’s shirt. He flinched-- probably at the cold feeling of the metal on his skin, but he breathed in deeply without her even asking. She listened for a few moments before pulling away from him and draping the device over her neck.

Standing, the doctor made her way over to the wall to pick up another device. “When did you start feeling ill?” She asked, twisting on one of the nibs to the machine.

Ren coughed into one of his fists, clearing his throat after. “Yesterday.” And for the first time, Ryuji noticed just how raspy his voice was sounding. Maybe his throat was really scratchy. That might be why he hasn’t spoken much at all.

Tae just hummed in response, sticking one end of the device into Ren’s ear to check it. And then she checked the other, a frown on her face. After cleaning that up, she moved on to the counter-- grabbing a wooden stick from a jar and then returning to Ren. “Open up. She insisted, tugging a flashlight from her pocket.

And once that was finished, she threw away the stick and tugged off the gloves she’d pulled on while Ryuji undressed his neighbor earlier, tossing them to the garbage. “It seems as though it’s just a cold. I could check for the flu, but I don’t think it’s that serious.”

That was good to hear. Ryuji didn’t want Ren getting too sick, after all. And he seemed so down that something like the flu just didn’t seem like it’d be all that great to add to his list of issues. He perked up at the diagnosis while Tae rolled herself back over to the desk, crossing one leg over the other while she wrote down something on her clipboard.

Ryuji was quick to be by Ren’s side again after he sneezed, tugging his gloves onto his hands and then working on pulling his coat on as well.

“Now,” Tae began. Ryuji didn’t quite like the tone in her voice. Demanding at yet playful, he turned to look at her while she continued to scribble down her notes. “I _could_ write you a prescription. _Or_ you could humor me a bit.”

What was she talking about? _Humor_ her? How?

“Something tells me you’d prefer the second method.” Tae muttered, then turning to face the boys again. There was an almost devilish smirk on her face-- much like the one Ren usually wore when he was feeling especially mischievous. Whether he learned it from her, or if it was vice versa, Ryuji had no idea. “Need I remind you of our little deal?”

In Ryuji’s confusion, Ren seemed to continue dressing himself, finishing up pulling his jacket on. His scarf was being wrapped around his neck when Ryuji turned to look at him again, and Ren was working on tucking the ends of it into his jacket. Oh. That was a good idea…

“Yeah, yeah.” He said, though he kept his gaze averted. The small frown on his lips seemed to be one of annoyance. Did he not want to do any _favors_ for Tae? “Just give me the medicine.”

Wait. A _deal_? It may have taken Ryuji a second to remember it, but back then-- back when he sprained his ankle. Ren and Tae had talked multiple times about _deals_. What kind of a deal _was_ this? The more he thought about it, the sketchier it seemed.

Ryuji was about to speak when he heard Tae chuckling. “Very well.” 

Turning back towards the female, Ryuji watched as she opened one of the drawers at the counter. She tugged a bottle from the drawer and looked it over before placing it back inside and then picking a different one out. 

This one seemed to please her, because she held it out towards Ryuji, looking up at him from her spot on the chair. He took the bottle nervously, looking over what was inside.

The bottle was tinted orange in color, and the liquid inside was a deep color-- dark. It sloshed around as he looked over the label. There was only a few words written on it, and Ryuji had no idea what any of them meant. Perhaps they were ingredients? Hell, but this prescription bottle was like nothing Ryuji had ever seen before. He swallowed a lump in his throat.

_Under the table medicine._

But was this safe for Ren to take? Sure, Tae was a doctor, but something seemed really fishy about her practices. 

“Make sure he takes two tablespoons when you get back.” She began, motioning to the bottle while Ren finished getting ready to leave. “He may become dizzy, tired, and perhaps a bit delirious. Don’t let him fight it. As soon as he becomes tired, put him to bed.” She instructed. 

 

“Right.” Well… Ryuji would have to find out if he was really okay with taking this once they got home. He wouldn’t ask right in front of Tae, but it was definitely a problem that needed to be addressed.

They did have their medicine, however, and since Ren was sick… Well, they should probably head home.

Hopefully he could fall asleep a little early tonight. That should help too, right? Rest was perfect for when you were sick.

And they were out on the street again moments later. Tae mentioned that they needn't pay for a thing so long as Ren told her how the medicine worked out. Ryuji still didn’t like the idea of him taking something so unpredictable, but… He couldn’t stop Ren.

He was looking down at the bottle as they walked, frowning at it. Was this really _safe_? It sure didn’t feel like it.

“Hey, Ren,” he started, then looking back at his neighbor. Ren’s interest seemed piqued and he glanced to Ryuji. “About what she said back there. You sure this stuff is okay to take?”

Ren seemed confused at his question, wiping his nose most unflatteringly across the sleeve of his coat before returning his hand to his pocket. “Hmm? Yeah.”

It seemed like his mood had brightened a little bit. Some time out of the house had been good for him after all, huh? Ren hated being cooped up in his apartment. Fresh air and a walk was nice, right? Perfect for when his neighbor (setting the love interest part aside in favor of just a friendly _helping_ ) when he was upset.

Still he didn’t like the idea of Ren putting something toxic into his body. The cigarettes were bad enough.

“I used to do this all the time.”

 _All the time_?

Ren did shit like this often? In his youth! What an irresponsible prick!

Ryuji settled for scoffing a little bit, pouting as he turned the bottle over. There was no way this nameless sludge-like liquid would be any good for Ren. Tae had mentioned that he’d only had a cold most likely, so they could just stop by the drug store to get some cold medicine or something, right? It was the safer option, had similar side effects to a lot of standard medicines…

Was _this_ a standard medicine? 

But why was it unlabelled? Tae was weird, and Ryuji really didn’t know if she was trustworthy. Ren seemed to trust her a lot though…

He sighed, turning the bottle back over to the front.

And then he felt a rough shove against his shoulder. It was as if he had been knocked into by someone else who had been walking by. 

The force had been enough to turn him to the side slightly, and he almost dropped the medicine he was carrying. Thankfully he had a tight grip on it, but still! It was a close call! Close enough that he had to look down at his hands to make sure he wasn’t just dreaming that he’d been able to keep a hold on it.

“Hey! Watch it!”

Ryuji turned to face whoever had run into him. A short male-- dark hair and eyes. He was a scruffy looking man, and there was a clear look of disgust on his face.

“S-sorry, man,” Ryuji began, free hand rubbing at the back of his neck. “It was an accident.” Why were Americans so rude around here? A simple “sorry” would have sufficed. Or they didn’t even have to say anything at all! It was clear that it wasn’t purposeful. Then again, Ryuji really hadn’t been paying attention to where he was walking, and he was sure this other guy probably wasn’t looking either.

But his words only seemed to fuel the male’s anger. Storming up to Ryuji so much so that they were almost touching, he caused Ryuji to take a step or two back. He didn’t count-- he _couldn’t_ count. His mind was racing far too quickly for him to think clearly. Was he really going to do this? Right here? On the street?

“Accident don’t mean a thing!” He said, jabbing a finger in Ryuji’s direction. He poked at his chest with a boney finger and it hurt-- forcing Ryuji to take another step back in response. “Don’t pick fights ya can’t handle, fuckin’ brat! I could have you on the ground in a pile of your own blood in the blink of an eye!”

 

_Why was he trying to rile Ryuji up like this? He was the one who picked the damn fight!_

But he couldn't just fight this guy. Ryuji hadn’t gotten into a fist fight in years, and he was sure he was out of shape. And as small as this guy was compared to him-- almost a full head, Ryuji really didn’t want to take the chance against him. You really shouldn’t underestimate people. Ryuji’s mother had taught him that years ago.

“What? Finally shut up?” He man asked, shoving at Ryuji’s shoulder once again. 

It wasn’t that he didn’t want to say anything! He just… Didn’t know _what_ to say. Keep your mouth shut, Ryuji. It was for the best, right? 

But it was so wrong! This guy had fire brewing in Ryuji’s body, and he clenched his fist. But he had to hold back. He couldn’t just fight someone, and he _definitely_ couldn’t do it in front of Ren.

But the male turned towards Ren after that.

No. _Oh no_. Ryuji was not going to have him target not only some sick guy, but his neighbor, next! Ren was his best friend! He wasn’t feeling well! And Ryuji was not going to have it.

But before he could manage to say anything, the male’s demeanor completely changed. Whereas he seemed angry before, now he seemed… 

Ryuji knew that look in his eyes. Features fading and shoulders falling-- his eyes widened as he looked at Ren, his mouth hanging open.

 _That was fear_.

Frowning, Ryuji glanced to Ren just as the other male turned and hurried off. But he was met with a very… Strange expression.

Ren’s mouth was formed into a thin line. His eyes were narrowed and his jaw was tense. He’d never looked so… Emotionless to Ryuji before. But something seemed strange about him. He was stiff. Tough. Condescending. 

Ren was _furious_. And though he didn’t show any outwards appearances of it, the aura he seemed to radiate was almost overbearing. Ryuji felt a cold chill run up his spine and he shivered.

But then Ren’s gaze darted to him and instantly his disposition was changed. It was like in the blink of an eye-- just as spontaneous as Ren always had been. He turned towards Ryuji with wide eyes, smile on his lips and sniffling a bit under the guise of his cold.

And though he’d completely changed, it wasn’t fast enough. Ryuji had seen that look on his face, and he was just… _Terrified_. Where and _when_ had Ren learned to seem so malicious?

He swallowed the lump in his throat. Ren was probably the shadiest guy he’d ever met.


	25. It Begins

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry.

Okay, so he was going to chalk it up to Ren being sick-- _so incredibly sick_ that he couldn’t control his emotions as well. Yeah. That could have been it.

Or Ryuji could have read him wrong. He could be so horribly, _painfully_ wrong about the face Ren wore that it was just crazy.

Shit. There was no way he’d just been seeing things. Ren was definitely furious in that moment. And not once had Ryuji ever seen anyone so pissed that they couldn’t even show it. That stare-- the subtle movement of his eyes narrowing and the slight downturn of his mouth…

Ryuji had never seen Ren anything aside from happy or sad. This new revelation about him was _terrifying_.

But Ren was kind. He was his friend. He’d never-- _not once_ hurt Ryuji. 

Sure, he’d given him quite a few scares. Hell, Ryuji probably couldn’t count the amount of times he’d been terrified by his neighbor’s actions on both of his hands. Ren was reckless, and it did cause quite a stir in Ryuji’s life.

But he was always great to Ryuji. They were _friends_.

Or… Well, kinda more than friends. It was weird. Ryuji had feelings for Ren, sure. That much was true. After stewing it over for a bit, it was…. Probably obvious. The tightening in his chest? The ache when they parted? The way his stomach churned like thick butter when Ren smiled at him-- shit. He was pretty deep into Ren. Not physically! Metaphorically!

He’d keep it a secret from Futaba though. She’d just tease the hell out of Ryuji. Probably something about being or whatever. He didn’t care to think about her or how she _may_ have actually been right.

But he just couldn’t get the mental image of Ren’s face out of his mind-- not even as they’d made it back to the apartment. Hell, Ryuji wasn’t even thinking straight in that moment.

They ended up at his apartment. Ren sat on his bed while he rummaged through the medicine cabinet to look for his old medicine measuring cup. It was not where he’d thought he’d left it though. In fact, he couldn’t find it anywhere inside of the cabinet at all. His shaking hands were having difficulty moving some of his things around too.

A stray bottle of pain medicine fell into the sink and Ryuji cursed under his breath. It was the third one he’d dropped too-- his shaking hands unable to grasp anything properly. Hell, Ren even had to open the door for him when they got back to the apartment.

He hadn’t even looked at his neighbor since they’d last seen that angry guy on the street. He was too scared to see just what else was written across Ren’s face. 

That forced smile on his lips after Ryuji had caught him just made the blonde’s blood run cold. _How_? How could he try and trick Ryuji like that? Ryuji might have forgotten it before, but now… He was suddenly reminded that Ren always seemed to be hiding things from him. He’d never been fully, truly _honest_ with him. There was always that lingering feeling that he was keeping something _huge_ hidden right under Ryuji’s nose.

And with how he tried to get some people to shut up at the worst times-- right when Ryuji was going to finally learn _something_ , he was sure he’d never fully know just what his neighbor was up to.

With that guy-- Goro, and also with Iwai…

And then a sudden thought crossed his mind. Ren was trying to hide something from him, right? Why didn’t Ryuji ever try to do the same thing to him? Goro would be difficult to get into contact with (not that Ryuji particularly _wanted_ to see him again), but Iwai-- Ryuji knew he had a shop near his place of work. What was it called again? Unobtainable? Unmentionable?

Both of those sounded so wrong that it was almost disgusting. But, hey. It was a start. With a little bit of research, Ryuji could find that place in no ti-

“Ryuji?”

Ren’s voice caught Ryuji so off guard that he dropped the thermometer he held in his hand to the sink, the other hand knocking around a few bottles from the cabinet. A couple fell to the ground or into the sink again before Ryuji spun to look at his neighbor with his back pressed to the wall that was once beside himself.

Ren looked confused. There was a small frown on his face as he stood in the doorway, one hand on the wood. “I called your name. You… Didn’t respond.”

Huh? Oh. Shit. Was he that lost in thought that he didn’t hear his own name? Ren was only in the next room. Ugh. He was so distracted.

Ren’s gaze fell to the ground for a moment before it landed on Ryuji again. “Are you okay? You’ve been in here for a while…”

Speaking of, how long _had_ it been? He’d started off searching for the elusive measuring cup, but he’d ended up lost. 

“Uh, yeah…” He muttered, then turning back to the medicine cabinet. He stuffed all of the bottles and various objects back into it before closing it, and then he rushed past Ren in the doorway. It was probably rude to shove him out of the way a little bit, but he really didn’t want Ren to be so concerned about why Ryuji was taking so long in here. “I’m fine.”

He made his way over to the kitchen and opened up one of the drawers just as Ren appeared in the doorway once again. He was just in time to spot Ryuji settling for pulling a tablespoon from the drawer. 

It wasn’t the little designated measuring cup for medicine, but it was the same amount of holding space, right? And if not, it was close enough. Sketchy medicine could be taken in not-so-correct amounts, right?

So long as it was less than the average.

Ryuji could live with that. He’d just have to trust Tae. As weird as she was, she was still a doctor. And _Ren_ trusted her. So that was good, right? Ryuji trusted Ren…

Maybe that was a mistake.

 

He shook the thoughts from his mind (though it was physical manifestation as well), and then turned to his neighbor, holding out the spoon. “S-sorry. Couldn’t find the cup.”

Ren didn’t seem to mind though, taking the spoon and then letting his arm fall to his side.

“Now,” Ryuji began, looking to Ren’s hands and then the counter space around him. “Where’s the bottle?”

Ren jabbed a thumb behind himself, his shoulders slumping. “You left it on the table.”

Shit. Right. In the other room. Ryuji’s mind was so frantic that he couldn’t seem to think straight at the moment. 

Reaching out and grabbing Ren’s shoulders (much to his surprise if he’d been judging by the small jolt that his neighbor did, as well as his mouth snapping shut despite his clogged nose), Ryuji spun him around as quickly as he could and ushered him out of the room. 

“Great! Go sit at the table, and I’ll bring you some water!”

Ren’s legs seemed like they felt like jelly, because he didn’t even seem to put up a fight as he was shoved into the tiny hallway at all. He did slow down, Ryuji noticed, when he was finished being shoved though, but the blonde was quick to turn back to the cabinets so that he could fill up a glass of water.

After that was finished, Ryuji made his way to the main living area of the apartment. Ren wasn’t _sitting_ at the table, but he was standing there while filling up his tablespoon. At least he listened a little bit.

Ryuji made it to him just in time to watch him take the first spoon full of liquid. Instantly Ren’s face curled in disgust, teeth bared and shoulders raising as he forced the medicine down his throat. Shit. He’d never seen a reaction out of him like that. Must be pretty bad tasting.

“Here, dude.” Ryuji insisted, holding out the water. 

Ren took it gratefully, and he was quick to down half the glass, coughing onto the back of one hand after. He seemed out of breath at the moment, and Ryuji took the spoon from his hand after.

“Relax. Don’t choke yourself over this shit.” He said, giving Ren’s arm a gentle pat. And then he took the bottle from the table to fill up the spoon as well. He filled it to the brim before holding it out towards Ren’s lips.

His neighbor seemed reluctant to take it though, lips already curling instinctively.

“Come on,” he insisted, pressing the spoon against the black haired male’s lips. “Doc says ya need two tablespoons.”

Ren put up not resistance after that, obediently, though reluctantly, opening his mouth to take the medicine.

He was quick to drink it this time, turning away from Ryuji to swallow and then gulp down his water after. He felt bad reducing Ren to this mess, but it was for his health, right?

But after he was done, Ryuji wandered back to the kitchen to toss the spoon into the sink, then rejoining his neighbor and closing the medicine bottle. “Go on. Sit on the sofa till we gotta take ya home.

Ryuji’s old couch was a dull tan color. Sitting against one of the walls, it faced his television where most of his games lay. Hopefully getting Ren to play a little something would tire him out, and then he could get him home quickly.

And Ryuji was right. After just a short while of duking it out against each other, Ryuji caught Ren falling asleep right as he was about to start a new battle. His skill had been steadily decreasing over time, so Ryuji knew it’d only been a matter of time before he was too tired to play any longer. And once he spotted Ren silently snoozing beside him, Ryuji sighed. 

What were the symptoms Tae had mentioned? Tired? Dizzy? Something else…

He thought for a moment.

Oh, right! Delirious.

Some weird symptom for some cold medicine, if you asked him.But who was he to judge?

Standing up with a grunt, Ryuji went to the closet and slipped on his shoes before returning to the couch. He’d grabbed Ren’s shoes on the way, and he was still wearing his jacket for extra warmth, so he really only had to worry about his foot protection. Leaning down, Ryuji gently shook Ren.

“Hey, man. Come on. Lets get ya home.”

His neighbor awoke with a jolt, sucking in a sudden breath. Wide-eyed, he looked up at Ryuji, panting heavily. Guess he really spooked him, huh? He did notice that Ren’s hand slipped into the front of his jacket. Was he looking for something in there? Weird. Oh well. He had to remember what symptoms Tae had mentioned.

Ryuji offered him a smile, patting his shoulder gently. “Come on, dude. I’ll tuck ya in.”

Tuck him in? _Really_? That sounded far too affectionate. But, hey. It wasn’t like the two of them didn’t get pretty touchy sometimes. And Ren sure could get flirty sometimes.

He was like that with everyone though. No wonder he was popular.

Ren complied though, one hand on the arm of the chair while the other laid the game controller down onto the cushions beside him. 

Ryuji took a step back while Ren made his first attempt to stand up, but his legs seemed like they barely wanted to work, and he slumped back into the couch. Oh, man. Poor guy looked so tired-- so _exhausted_. Tae was right about that part.

It was a good thing Ryuji was here to help him. But he really didn’t have the extra blankets to let Ren stay over. Sure, he could just go down and grab everything for him and then bring them back here, but… Well, it was nice to stay in your own place, right? 

Morgana sure would like it if Ren was home, and Ryuji was sure that Ren would like to have his favorite cuddle buddy back. Speaking of the cat, Ryuji was really hoping he was all right. He hadn’t even seen the poor thing back when Goro was at the apartment.

He took a step closer once again, reaching out and taking Ren’s awaiting hand. 

With the aid of Ryuji, Ren was able to push himself up from the couch, and he stumbled against the blonde, Ryuji’s arms wrapping around him so that he wouldn’t fall. Poor guy couldn’t even stand up straight. He was holding his head too. Ryuji felt terrible, but he really had to get him home.

“You okay?” He found himself asking, pulling away from Ren just enough to look at his face. 

His glasses had slipped from his nose slightly, and Ryuji was quick to push them up for him. A closer inspection of the glasses told Ryuji that he’d finally managed to get a new pair. This one had golden arms on them. Wow. Someone was feeling _fancy_ when he purchased himself a new pair.

Or maybe he’d just found a set of spare glasses. 

The responses was a small nod, accompanied by an even smaller (and much weaker) smile.

Ren was hanging off of him pretty hard though. Ryuji was worried about him being able to make it home, but he seemed to be able to slip his shoes on without too much trouble.

Of course, Ryuji was the one bearing most of his weight though.

They made it out into the hall with minimal difficulty, Ren’s arm slung over Ryuji’s shoulders. There was no way they’d be taking the steps in this state, so Ryuji lead Ren down the hall and to the elevator, pressing the button and then checking above the doors to see which floor it was on.

Ren coughed beside him, attempting to stand on his own as he pressed a balled up fist to his lips. Ryuji noticed it from the corner of his eye. He frowned, the hand on Ren’s back patting it gently.

Come on, damn elevator. Move faster, you lazy son of a-

The two bells rang and the doors opened, so Ryuji slipped into the small room and pressed the button for the floor below.

And once they’d made it there, Ryuji lead Ren back to his place while his neighbor sought to find the keys in his jean pocket in the slowest way possible. He took his arm from around Ryuji when he finally fished them out, looking through them for the correct one. Why did Ren even have so many keys? His keyring was full of ‘em…

But once he’d found the appropriate one, he held it out to the lock. He had to take a few times to get it correctly into the slot (along with a little help on Ryuji’s part to direct his hand), but then they were inside. 

Jeez. Seeing Ren like this was almost painful.

He’d always appeared so strong-- so _tough_. This medicine was really taking its toll on him. 

The sooner they got him to bed, the better. 

They slipped into the apartment and to the bed. Ryuji helped Ren sit down before moving to his dresser. And before he was able to open it up to start looking for some of Ren’s pajamas, he heard a small noise of protest from his neighbor.

Hands on the knob to pull the drawer out, Ryuji glanced over to the male on the bed, who was pointing towards the dresser. He was turned around in a strange angle to look at Ryuji.

“Next one down.” 

His voice was so weak. He was probably going to pass out any minute.

But Ryuji did as he said, moving down one drawer and tugging it open. It slipped open with little effort, and he was met with a drawer full of… Jeans. Really? Ren wasn’t trying to sleep in these, right? He must be more out of it than Ryuji thought he’d been.

But then Ren laid across the bed and reached out. He tugged under a couple pairs of jeans to produce some sweatpants. Oh. Good. He could wear those.

But then Ren didn’t move. He stayed laying there on the bed with his arm dangling over the side, loosely holding the sweatpants in his hand. Was… Was he _stuck_?

Looking over at him proved that his eyes were closed.

No, he was just asleep. 

Taking the pants from him seemed to wake him up though, and Ren attempted to sit up while Ryuji unfolded them, then holding them out to his neighbor. Ren reached for the front of his pants, and then Ryuji figured he should give him a bit of privacy.

Placing the sweatpants down, Ryuji turned away from Ren only to hear his neighbor speak up.

“Morgana needs dinner.”

Dinner? Oh! Right! That was a good way to give Ren some alone time to get changed!

Ryuji was quick to slip to the kitchen without turning back, heading to cabinets and grabbing one of the cans of cat food from it. And only when he’d opened the can had he spotted the familiar feline hopping up onto the counter beside him. Oh, poor Morgana. Had he been spooked earlier? Ryuji hadn’t seen him at all…

“Hey, bud.” He said, petting Morgana’s head after he was gently headbutt by the cat. Poor thing. At least he was running around now. It seemed like only the promise of food had him out from hiding. 

Morgana let out a meow, his tail swishing as he dove for the food.

“Nuh uh.” Ryuji insisted, pulling the can away from him. “Your dad would kill me if I let ya get hurt.”

Instead he reached to the ground, picking up Morgana’s dish. The contents of the can were tossed inside and then he placed the bowl down onto the counter. Ren wouldn’t mind Morgana eating up there, right? The cat was a damn princess. 

After properly disposing of the can, Ryuji made his way back into the main living area of the apartment. Ren had apparently been conscious enough to remove his jacket (and drop it to the floor beside the bed with his jeans), and he’d managed to half crawl under the blanket before passing out again. Hopefully he’d stay asleep all night long.

Ryuji found himself chuckling a little, hands on his hips as he smiled at his neighbor. At least the poor guy was finally resting comfortably. He could take some medicine again when he woke up. It might knock him out again, but at least he’d been coughing less.

Oh.

Speaking of medicine, Ryuji had left it upstairs. He would probably have to run and grab it for Ren then.

Turning towards the door, Ryuji left the apartment as quietly as he could and head for the stairs. It was probably faster to take those than to wait for the elevator. Ryuji really wanted to take off his own day clothes to get comfortable.

Upon entering his own apartment again, Ryuji head over to the table and picked up the bottle of medicine. The trip back to Ren’s place was quick, but he stopped off in the kitchen to grab a tablespoon. With how little Ren took care of himself in comparison to his cat, Ryuji wasn’t even sure he should bother checking the medicine cabinet for one.

Next, he pulled a water bottle from the refrigerator. Can’t take medicine without it, right?

Well, you _could_ , but that was just barbaric. 

Morgana seemed to have finished eating while Ryuji was gone, so he moved the cat dish to the sink and quickly rinsed it out before setting it back to its place on the floor. And now he could get to finishing up taking care of Ren, and then maybe play a few video games to get him through his night.

Smiling to himself, Ryuji made his way over to Ren’s bed. He placed down the bottles and the spoon onto the side table, and then glanced at his neighbor. He seemed to be sweating a little, face curling up in his sleep. Maybe he was dreaming? Poor guy had barely shifted in his sleep, but his blankets really weren’t draped over him nicely. They were really askew, actually. At least he’d managed to get his glasses off though-- resting on the side table beneath the lamp. Ren himself was on his stomach, one arm over the side of the bed as the blanket draped over the lower half of his body.

Well, Ryuji _did_ promise that he would tuck Ren in…

Reaching over his neighbor, Ryuji picked up the blanket as carefully as he could, tugging it up to Ren’s chin. And then there was a sudden blur of movement from the male below him-- reaching beneath his pillowcase and then turning to face Ryuji.

Ren was seemingly wide awake, eyes the widest Ryuji had ever seen them and easy to notice now that his glasses weren’t covering them. He was panting heavier than ever before, his chest heaving-- rising and falling under heavy breaths, as well as his shoulders.

He was trembling-- his arm visibly shaking and mouth hung pen. Ryuji had never seen him so absolutely _terrified_ in his life. 

But there was something more concerning in that moment. A bright, shining, and silver barrel was just mere inches from his face. Ryuji may not have ever seen one so close to him in his entire life, but he _knew_ it when he saw one.

_A gun_.

Ryuji was out of the apartment before he could think-- stumbling to the door and tumbling out into the hall. Absently, he recalled slamming the door shut behind himself and he rushed to the stairs.

They carried him as fast as he could to his home, and he slammed the door behind himself harder than he had Ren’s.

It was like tunnel vision. He hadn’t recalled a damn thing in that hallway or to his apartment, but the next thing he knew, he was on the ground in his foyer, hands and knees pressed to the disgusting brown linoleum tiles that resided in the opening of the home. Never before had he been so happy to see that shit so close.

His stomach wretched, and he swallowed the burning in his throat. Shit. Shit, this was _bad_.

Ren had a _gun_?! Sure, Ryuji had had suspicions, but…

For the first time in a long while, Ryuji recalled just how _dangerous_ Ren appeared. He was always hiding something, there was always that glint in his eye, and he was always acting so shady that…

_He’d pulled a gun on Ryuji._

The blonde pushed all other thoughts to the back of his mind. That image of the pistol in his neighbor’s hand and aimed at him was making him sick. He’d been _so close_ to dying just moments before, and…

_He needed answers_.

He was tired of Ren hiding. He was tired of being left in the dark while everyone else knew what was going on. But who could he turn to? He wasn’t close to Boss, Ann seemed to want to hide it just as much as Ren, Hifumi didn’t seem like she’d know anything, Goro was missing in action, and there was _no way_ Ren was going to answer-- even if Ryuji wanted to speak with him.

But then one person popped into his mind. They’d tried to spill the beans before, and he had a rough knowledge of them from a past experience. Yes, if there was one person he could turn to for answers, it was _him_.

_Iwai_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And now it begins B)


	26. Answers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Writing Iwai is intimidating, but I think I got him down all right! He's one of my favorite characters in the game-- I wish I could do him better. But here's to hoping it's not too cringey!
> 
> Enjoy!

Just a little bit of research was enough to find Iwai’s shop. A vague description of the area, what kind of store it was, “un” something in the name. _Untouchable_ was easy to find. Address and all.

There was only one picture of Iwai that Ryuji saw upon his research. It was taken of his side, and it appeared as one of the reviews for the shop. The place’s website though? Looked pretty stylish. It had a green and black color scheme, and had a lot of pretty cool looking features-- even on mobile.

But that wasn’t important. Ryuji really needed to learn as much as he could about Ren. _That_ was what he really needed to learn about.

It was easy-- just as easy as finding the shop.

Go in, demand answers, listen to those answers, gohome and confront Ren. Easy, see?

Though it was a lot easier said than done. The second Ryuji stormed into the gun shop and came face-to-face with the infamous Munehisa Iwai, his mind went blank.

What could he say? This guy obviously knew a hell of a lot more than he did about Ren. They have _history_ from the sound of it. With how comfortable Ren was around him, Ryuji assumed they’d known each other for a long while.

But with the way that Ryuji stormed into the shop-- with _purpose_ , he was sure that he startled Iwai. He was looking up at the blonde from his chair behind the counter with wide eyes and one eyebrow raised, the stick from the lollipop in his mouth lowering. 

His magazine was lowered as well, and he stared at Ryuji in silence.

Uh, now what?

Demanding his answers was a lot easier of a conversation to have when he was doing it with himself in his head. That, and his mind seemed really jumbled.

What order would he ask the questions? Hell, he didn’t even know where to start.

The beginning was probably best. But should he really ask how Iwai and Ren had met?

But before Ryuji could say a word, he heard Iwai sigh. The magazine on his lap was slowly closed and the feet he rest on the counter were brought to the floor. He tugged the lollipop from his mouth and then leaned on the counter.

“What d’ya need to know?”

Oh, so it looked like he had a vague idea of what Ryuji had come here for. Answers. It was a logical conclusion. With the way Ryuji burst into the shop combined with a probably very concerned look on his face, it would be the logical guess.

Ryuji had come here early-- near opening time for the shop. He had to make sure that it was a time when Ren was supposedly at work. He didn’t want to be caught here by his neighbor, and he really wasn’t ready for a confrontation anyway. A break while he got his thoughts together was probably for the best. 

Ryuji placed both of his hands on top of the counter. He frowned, watching as Iwai put his hands on his knees and stood up-- his lollipop in his mouth once again. 

“ _Everything._ ” He couldn’t think of anything else to say. This was what he wanted, right? He wanted to know everything that Ren was trying to hide from him. He hated feeling like he was left in the dark this whole time. “I want to hear everything ya know.”

Sighing again, Iwai crossed his arms over his chest. “S’a long story, kid.” And then he removed one arm from tucked against his body, pointing towards one of the small booths behind Ryuji with an upside down hand. Why did he even have chairs for customers in here? Was the gun shop so popular that he had guests hanging out for a long time? “Make yourself comfortable and then we’ll ta-”

“I don’t have time for that shit.” His own voice startled himself just as much as it seemed to startle Iwai, the older male’s eyes widening as he was cut off.

It was strange. Ryuji hadn’t felt so demanding in _years_. But he _had_ to know what was going on. He was tired of this bullcrap! He just wanted to get this information so he could figure out what to do next.

“C-come on, man.” Ryuji insisted, hands curling on top of the glass case that held knives and other hand-held items. He took a step closer to the counter. “I’m countin’ on ya. I don’t have anyone else to turn to!”

The look on Iwai’s face was sympathetic. He tugged the hat from his head, showing off slightly greying hair as he scratched the top of his head with his fingers. He replaced the hat after, and then he leaned forward to cross his arms as he leant on the countertop.

It was almost as if he was trying to stall Ryuji and gain a bit of time to think about what exactly to say. But he didn’t _have_ to think. Ryuji just wanted him to spill it already! Why was it so hard for him to get answers?

But then Iwai’s gaze met his own, and Ryuji felt his shoulders drop. There was something about that look on Iwai’s face that was concerning-- almost scary. He looked so worn out, and so god damn _tired_ that Ryuji felt bad. He was probably pushing some buttons here, but this was for his own good.

He’d make it up to Iwai if the information he got whas what he needed to hear.

“He’s dangerous.” He said suddenly, tugging the lollipop from his mouth again, though with a pop.

Well, _no shit_. Ryuji coulda told anyone that months ago if they’d asked him about Ren.

“Met ‘im years back.” Iwai seemed like he wanted to continue, looking off to the side as he seemed to recount the memories. There was a frown on his face as his eyebrows scrunched slightly. “He was young. High school. Came in here one day tellin’ me shit ‘bout wantin’ to learn about guns. Said he thought they were cool. What a load o’ bullshit.”

He stood upright after that, pushing himself up from the counter, though he still refused to meet Ryuji’s eyes again. 

“He was only tryin’ to learn how to protect himself.”

“ _Protect himself_?” Iwai glaced over at Ryuji when he’d asked, and his gaze flickered over all of Ryuji’s body before landing on his eyes again.

“Yeah.” And then he stuffed the lollipop into his mouth again.

“From what?”

“Got in with the wrong crowd. Saw him come in here with all sorts o’ injuries. Got into a lotta fights. Wouldn’t explain what they were about.” So Ren was always trying to hide stuff, huh?

Iwai then pushed himself away from the counter more-- wandering to the end and then slipping out from behind it. When he’d made his way to the closest booth, Ryuji was hot on his tail, slipping into the seat across from him.

He’d said he didn’t want to sit, but he wasn’t thinking about that now. Instead, he was too focused on learning what was going on to care about contradicting himself.

“He was always gettin’ hurt. I used to demand answers from him-- told him I wouldn’t share any information with ‘im if he kept gettin’ into scuffs.” And then he sighed _again_. “Didn’t stop ‘im. I didn’t have the heart to stop tellin’ him shit. Empty threats. Shoulda made ‘em count.”

Did Iwai blame himself for the messes that Ren got into? But Ren was the one who’d insisted on coming here-- Iwai had said so himself.

“S-so what kinda mess did he get himself into?” Ryuji’s voice was much more meek than it’d been earlier. Where he’d wanted to appear tough before, he was now reduced to a timid mess. Something told him that he wasn’t going to like the answers he got though.

“I told ya he got on with a bad crowd. It’s a shame. He’s a nice kid. Didn’t want t’see him get hurt like that, but I couldn’t stop ‘im either. He doesn’t listen to anythin’ I try to get him to do.” He shook his head, then looking at Ryuji, his mouth forming into a thin line before he continued.

“He thinks he’s some bringer of _justice_. Tries to put the real shits in their place. He’s a vigilante-- thinks the police can’t do shit. He learned how t’fight. Learned how t’defend himself. Takes to the streets. Beats the hell outta people he thinks do wrong.” And then he shook his head. “Granted, he’s probably _right_ , but it gets him into a hell of a lot of trouble. Got himself locked up for a while.”

“Ren went to _prison_?!” Ryuji’s palms made contact with the table in his shock, chest heaving.

Iwai shook his head. “Just jail. Aggravated battery. Landed a guy in the hospital. Roughed ‘im up real good.” Iwait then laughed dryly, seeming like he wasn’t sure if he was proud or disgusted. “But he was locked up for a year. Wasn’t the first time he’s been put away-- don’t know what the other time was for.”

He didn’t seem like he was lying about that part.

“Is… Is he part of a gang or something?” Ryuji found himself asking.

“No.” Iwai’s answer was firm, and he pulled the lollipop from his mouth again. “Don’t belong to a family-- crowd, _whatever_. He works alone. No one wants to deal with that trouble. But no one wants to mess with ‘im either.” Ren _had_ always been trouble…

“So about the gun-”

“ _Look_.” Iwai said, eyebrows knitting down. “Ya came here to _learn_. Keep your mouth shut ‘till I’m done.” 

Ryuji found himself shifting back in his seat a bit sheepishly, shrinking down. Whoops. Seems like he struck a nerve.

And then he pinched the bridge of his nose. “He bought it a few years back after someone pulled one on him. Said he’d feel safer. Had t’warn ‘im about the dangers of holdin’ a gun. He’s… He’s a _soft_ kid. Wouldn’t have the heart t’kill someone.”

That was a pretty weird thing to say right after he’d just told Ryuji that Ren had beaten the shit out of someone.

“I taught him how to clean it, load it, use it… He’s not a bad shot, but you should see him after he uses it. He _shakes_ He said, looking down at his hands. “He’s _scared_ of the damn thing, but he’s convinced he needs it. He carries it on ‘im all the time-- doesn’t leave the house without it.” And then he shook his head. “Told ‘im it was dangerous. Said he’d be fine if he kept the safety on.”

So Ren had kept the gun on him the whole time they were together? Every time he reached for his side, his pocket, his jacket… Every time it was for the gun? What? WAs he trying to check that it was still there, or did he feel _threatened_?

And then Iwai groaned, looking to Ryuji again. “Kid, he’s got a lot of _baggage_. Ya sure ya want t’deal with that?”

It seemed like he’d been keeping that in for a while. Iwai didn’t seem like a bad guy, but more like a concerned parent. Granted, he was probably old enough to be Ryuji’s dad.

But he had to think about that question. _Was_ this something Ryuji wanted to have to deal with? He was interested in Ren-- _really_ interested in him. Hell, he may even be interested enough in him to pursue a future as something more than friends with him…

But Iwai was right. He was _dangerous_.

Ren was the best friend Ryuji had ever had. He didn’t want to have to end a relationship with him, but would that be safer? Being in with the wrong group of people, getting into all of this mess…

_Pulling a gun on Ryuji_.

Maybe he didn’t mean that though. Maybe he was just stuck in his frantic state due to the medicine. But that didn’t change the fact that he felt he was in so much danger that he insisted on keeping a gun on his person at all times-- whether it be for violence or for protection.

Ren had never been violent with him before, but who was to say that wasn’t all an act? Ryuji had no idea what to do.

“I… Don’t know.” He said, looking down at his hands on the table. It was the most logical answer he could think to come up with. He really had no idea where he wanted to go from here. Learning more answers only made him feel more like shit.

Ren was always getting himself into trouble. He was getting himself into danger. And why? Because he couldn’t trust anyone. What a twisted way of thinking. But if he was going to turn on Ryuji next, then what would the blonde do? He could seriously get hurt.

“Think about it.” Iwai said suddenly, rising from his seat. Ryuji watched as he slid out of the booth, then turning to face the blonde again. “Give ‘im some space. _You_ probably need some too.”

Iwai was right. He did need some time to think about it.

“Judgin’ by how pale y’are, somehtin’ happened between ya.” And only when Ryuji opened his mouth to answer did Iwai hold up one hand as if trying to silence him. Ryuji complied, closing his mouth. “I won’t ask. S’not my business.”

That only made Ryuji look down at his hands again before pushing himself out of the booth and to the ground, stuffing his hands into his pockets. It was probably about time he left anyway. There was still so much to learn, but… He felt _overwhelmed_. This was a lot of information to take in at once. Maybe he’d just come back looking for answers again later. He still had to process what he’d learned _now_.

He felt Iwai’s hand on his lower back though, guiding him towards the door. And he obeyed, taking the few steps there before they both stopped at the door. Ryuji’s hand went to grab for the door handle, but Iwai’s beat him there. He didn’t open the door though, instead turning beside Ryuji to look at him again.

“Kid,” he began, and Ryuji dared to look at him. The expression on his face was just as before-- sympathetic. “I’ve known ‘im for over a decade. Don’t know ‘im best, but he’s like a son t’me.” Oh, so they _were_ close. “He _protect_ people-- his _friends_. They mean the world to ‘im.”

And then he paused, stepping between Ryuji and the door.

“If there’s anythin’ I’ve learned about that shit stain, it’s that he’d give his life to protect what he loves.” And then he reached out, gently poking at Ryuji’s chest. “He cares about ya-- talks about ya nonstop. It’s _annoying_.” That at least got Ryuji to chuckle a little bit. Everyone did say that Ren spoke about him often.

But then Iwai continued.

“He won’t hurt ya. Cares about ya too damn much. I might be biased, but…” And then he took a deep breath, his eyes closing for just a moment. “Trust ‘im. He hides shit for a reason.”

Wasn’t that the truth? Ryuji hated that he hid _so much_ though. He just wanted to _know_.

But now that he _did_ know, he wasn’t sure if it was the best thing for him.

“I don’t know.” He said, his shoulders slumping. “It’s just that-”

A sudden ringing caused Ryuji to stop speaking. It was the familiar ringtone of a cell phone, and Iwai reached into his pocket to tug his out. The look on his face when he looked back to Ryuji said it all-- _Ren was calling him_.

“Think about it.” He said one last time, tugging open the door roughly as he pushed the phone to his ear. “What?”

And then there was a pause as Ryuji stepped out of the store. 

“Kid, calm down. I can’t understand ya like that.” 

Ryuji paused in the doorway to turn around and watch Iwai while he was on the phone, but the older male was busy staring at the wall across from himself-- supposedly focused on the conversation he was having.

“What? No. I’m not closin’ just ‘cause ya want to-” He paused again, glancing to Ryuji. “No, he’s not here… Fine. Shop’s closed. Get your ass here before I change my mind.” And with that, Iwai used his head to motion for Ryuji to get lost, jolting it in the direction of the street.

He got the hint after that. No more eavesdropping. He really needed to go. If Ren was on his way here, then he did _not_ want to be caught-- especially since Iwai was (seemingly) covering for him at the moment.

“ _Ten minutes_? You’re already on your way here, ya son of a-”

The shop’s door closed before Ryuji could hear the last of the sentence, Iwai flipping the “open” sign backwards and clicking the lock so no one could enter the shop unannounced.

Shit. Ryuji had thought Ren would be at work longer. He didn’t think he’d be leaving so early just to… See Iwai. He was probably looking for answers too. But, then again, Ryuji had never been certain that Ren had gone to work at all. This was dangerous. Ren could have show up at any moment, and here he was sitting in the open and talking about him.

It looked like he was going to have to take a different way home. Or at least wait until he was sure that Ren was at the shop. He did _not_ want to run into him on the train.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally learning about Ren, huh? Some of you guys guessed answers that were pretty close! I'm proud of ya!


	27. Needs

Ryuji did as Iwai suggested.

Wait. Think about it. Think about how he _felt_.

He thought about how Ren might have felt as well.

He really wasn’t sure how he felt. Probably bad. But sometimes it was so difficult to read Ren that Ryuji had no idea what to expect from him. He’d certainly been good at hiding his secrets.

He hadn’t talked to Ren at all since that night. 

He had too many things to think about. He was too worried-- too _confused_ to speak to him. What would come of his relationship with his neighbor?Could Ryuji get hurt because of this? What about _Ren_? He was in danger too…

But maybe it was about time Ryuji thought about himself. Maybe it was time he took a step back to think that Ren _really was_ a dangerous guy. He’d been right from the start. Ren was always a fishy guy. And now that he could _confirm_ it, he just felt…

_Empty_.

He _knew_ that he should stay away from Ren. He _knew_ that he could cause him trouble. He _knew_ that something bad could come of this relationship that they had-- whether they just be friends or something more.

Ryuji cursed himself for seeming so stubborn, but even knowing what was up with Ren and how he could get into so much trouble because of him, Ryuji really couldn’t bring himself to want to completely push Ren away. Thinking about not having him in his life made his chest ache. Ryuji was never sure that he’d ever been in love before, but if this was what he was feeling, then…

He really didn’t want to stop being friends with his neighbor. 

Cheesy comedy romance aside, Ryuji had come to know his neighbor first as a nuisance and then as a friend. And now? All he wanted was to hold Ren’s hand-- to hug him when he was upset or to kiss him when he least expected it. 

Iwai was right. Ren had _a lot_ of baggage, but thinking about it, Ren had never once directed any negativity towards Ryuji. He’d always been _kind_ , albeit trying to hide shit from him. It did come out eventually, but…

What worried Ryuji was that Ren constantly had the gun on him. If something went wrong and he’d felt the need to always have one, then who was to say that something couldn’t go wrong again?

And what if Ryuji was there for it this time?

It was dangerous. _So_ dangerous. But Ren seemed to like to keep that life separate from his private life… Ryuji wasn’t sure what to do.

But he could start by confronting Ren about it.

It didn’t have to be forceful or violent, but he wanted answers. Ryuji _needed_ answers. He deserved that much at least, right? He sure thought so. He was glad to have those few days to himself though. He needed a break-- needed time to think.

And even if he wasn’t certain about anything else, he was certain that he really didn’t want to just lose Ren. 

He stood outside of his neighbor’s window, a frown on his face. It was freezing outside, and it was probably a shitty idea to confront Ren on the firescape. But it was where they met. It was where they spent a lot of their time together.

Here was where they shared memories.

Not to mention Ryuji could slip back to his place a hell of a lot faster from here than he could from inside of the other male's apartment-- if the need ever arose.

It was also probably easier to die out here. Being pushed off of the edge of the firescape would definitely prove fatal, and it could always be counted as a suicide.

Ryuji liked to think that Ren wasn't so heartless.

But he really had to get this conversation going. He'd freeze to death out here otherwise, and he'd never get the clarification that he needed. It may not have been a good visit from the blonde on this occasion, but he really hoped that Ren would sit with him for a little bit. He also hoped that he was home. There was a light on-- Ryuji noticed, but Ren often left a light or two on when he left the house.

Ryuji wasn't sure that he could will up the courage to come down here again if he couldn't do this tonight.

He took a deep breath. It was now or nothing.

Reaching out wth a hand curled into a fist, Ryuji knocked on the window-- once, twice, and then three times. He then recoiled, pulling his hand back and stuffing it into the pocket of his sweatshirt. There was no turning back now.

That was, unless Ren really wasn't home.

But the movement of a shadow behind the shades caught his attention. Far too big to be Morgana, Ryuji recognized it solely as his neighbor. There was no one else it _could_ be.

Unless he has a guest.

But Ryuji spotted none other than a familiar mop of black hair atop thick-rimmed glasses peeking from around the blinds. And then he disappeared much more quickly than he'd come, the blinds rising in the blink of an eye. He was holding the curtains aside with one hand while the other hand worked on opening the window.

And once that was open, Ren poked his head out into the cold night's breeze, a frown on his face.

"Hey." He muttered, arms crossing atop the windowsill. He looked like he was kneeling on the ground. He didn’t sound happy.

Then again, Ryuji was sure he wouldn’t sound happy either.

"Hey." Ryuji was able to force the word out, but nothing else came. There was only silence, Ren staring at Ryuji while the blonde looked to the ground by his feet.

Shit. After all of the practicing he did in preparation for this confrontation, he _still_ couldn't get anything out of his mouth. Hell, his mind was running blank now.

But what was he supposed to say? Despite the practicing he did, he’d never really managed to think of how to bring up the start of the conversation. But he did know one thing.

He wanted to sit down. Ren was sitting down (or kneeling. One of the two), so why didn’t he as well?

Ryuji turned, back facing the chair that Ren kept outside, and then slipped onto it. He (very ungracefully) almost knocked over the planter his neighbor kept there-- having to reach out and grab it with his hands. As a soft curse spilled from his mouth. Ugh. Of course he’d make an idiot of himself at a time like this. This was the time when he was supposed to look at least capable of himself! 

But the duo fell into silence again after that. It was silent for a few moments before Ren reached out and gently pat Ryuji atop the knee-- starling the blonde at the sudden contact. “I’ll make you hot chocolate.” And then he disappeared into the apartment and towards the kitchen.

Ryuji wasn’t really _expecting_ hot chocolate, but it was much appreciated. It was fucking cold out here on the firescape. But, again, he didn’t come here like this just to get hot chocolate.

Ren made some really damn good hot chocolate though.

He returned a few short minutes later, and Ryuji noted the scent of not only his hot chocolate, but also of freshly brewed coffee. A hand poked out from behind the curtains, and it contained a mug. Ryuji took it with a small notion of thanks, and then settled back into his chair while Ren sat in the window. Maybe he was sitting on that stool he kept by there. Either way, Ryuji spotted a mug in his own hands-- a familiar one with a painting of a black cat on it.

A gift Ryuji had bought him a couple of months back when he’d seen it at the supermarket. Ren really seemed to enjoy it.

Looking down at the mug in his own hand, Ryuji noted that it was floral in pattern. Ren also seemed to love plants. Cute.

He brought the mug to his lips, and he noted that the first sip he took was rather _cold_. There was an underlying heat though, and he’d only barely managed to burn his tongue. Did Ren put an ice cube in the drink so Ryuji wouldn’t immediately burn his mouth? That was… Really thoughtful. He supposed he’d only just drank it a little too quickly and ended up burning the tip of his tongue.

He sighed.

They were silent again after that. Ryuji no longer felt Ren’s gaze on him, and he assumed they were both looking out at the building across from them-- colorful lights shining the closer one’s gaze traveled towards the ground. The Big Apple was always so lively and busy. Even at night, the life was still bustling. 

It was nice to work nights in a place like this. There was always some place open.

They both sipped at their drinks silently-- very uncomfortably though. The air about them felt just awkward. Usually their silent moments weren’t bad, but this? After what happened last time, they were probably both afraid to talk.

But Ryuji missed having his best friend to hang out with every morning after work, and sometimes in the evenings before work. Of course on his days off as well. But this was the first time he’d managed a day like that since the incident. 

“I didn’t expect to see you for a while.”

Looking down to the mug in his lap, Ryuji swallowed a lump in his throat. Ren was right. Almost. Ryuji _really_ didn’t think he should be here like this-- not after what happened. But it just felt _wrong_ to abandon Ren. He didn’t want to leave him alone like that, but… He needed to gather his thoughts.

“I didn’t think you’d see me for awhile either. Not at first.” He brought his mug to his lips, taking a sip. It was nice to have the warm liquid. Gosh, it really did warm him up a little. 

“You didn’t have to come back.” 

Ren’s voice was small-- soft and almost afraid. It was as if he wasn’t sure what to say. It was like he was testing the waters with Ryuji to see just how far he could press him. Ryuji would let him though. Ren needed to start talking if he wanted their friendship to work out.

No more hiding shit.

But Ryuji then sighed, eyes closing as he laid his head back against the window behind himself. “I _wanted_ to.” Well, it was the truth. And if Ren was going to be made to be truthful, then Ryuji was going to have to go along with that as well. It wouldn’t be fair if he didn’t.

They fell silent after that again, Ryuji with his eyes closed and Ren sipping at his coffee. Ryuji swore he heard the faint meow of that damn cat, and he assumed that Ren was petting him from inside of the apartment.

They stayed silent for a few more moments-- Ryuji allowing it out of Ren while he too gathered his thoughts, until his neighbor was able to find what to speak with again.

“About the gun-”

“Iwai told me.” Honesty. That was what they needed. They had to finally sit down and be open with each other, right? That was what Ryuji needed now.

Ren fell silent again for a few moments.

“I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have gone to bed with it, but…”

“Hey.” Ryuji opened his eyes again, though he didn’t look at Ren. Instead, he just focused on the building across from himself. He was shaking-- he could feel it. He was almost too afraid to look at Ren. “How often you see those guys?” The dangerous ones Iwai told him about. He was sure Ren would know exactly what he was talking about.

“Often enough.” Was he avoiding answering with the truth? Hell no. Ryuji was _not_ having that.

“ _How_ often?” He asked, gaze traveling back to Ren. His neighbor was looking down-- almost ashamed of himself.

“It depends on how often I run into them.”

“How often do you go around lookin’ for ‘em?”

Ren sighed, and Ryuji spotted him scratching the back of his head-- a nervous gesture, most likely. “Often. _Really_ often.” He paused once again. “Maybe a few times a week.”

Ryuji sat up after that, elbows bent over his knees as he turned a little to face his neighbor. Morgana was indeed in his lap, attempting to get to the coffee in Ren’s mug, but his owner held it away from him.

Caffeine really wasn’t good for cats.

“Tell me somethin’.” He said, and he spotted Ren glancing up at him through thick glasses. “That one time-- back when I found ya in the alley… Was that _them_?” He wasn’t stupid. Why else would Ren have wandered down a dark alley like that? He certainly didn’t look like he’d been dragged back there.

He did nod a little bit though, glancing back to the ground. “Yes. It was a favor.”

“For Iwai?”

Another nod.

Ryuji felt himself groan, and he used one hand to rub at his face a little roughly. “Ya can’t do shit like that!” He felt like he was about to lecture some child. “Cool as Iwai is, it’s dangerous!”

“I insisted.”

Well, he was probably right. Iwai didn’t seem like the type to willingly throw Ren into danger. But Ren was always so insistent on stuff… Maybe Iwai had gotten used to it over the years. He’d mentioned that he’d known Ren for a long while…

“Doesn’t matter. Ya shouldn’t ‘o done it to begin with!” Yeah, he was definitely lecturing. But Ren had gotten himself into a huge mess, and now he didn’t seem like he wanted to dig himself out of it. “Ren, it’s _dangerous_!”

“So?” Ren’s answer was a little too quick for Ryuji’s liking. Was he really willing to just throw himself away like that? All for his damn “vigilante” work…

Ryuji took a deep breath after that, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Listen. That _Goro_ guy. He knows about this, right? This is what he was talkin’ about that night. Right?”

Opening one eye, he spotted Ren nodding. 

“Who else knows about it?”

Ren’s jaw tensed at the question. It seemed he didn’t like it. Well, that was too bad. Ryuji wanted answers. 

“Well?” His voice was probably a little too harsh for his own liking, but this was serious business. He didn’t want Ren getting hurt. Not again.

He also didn’t want _himself_ getting hurt.

“Boss, Ann,” He sighed. Well, it at least looked like he was willing to spill the beans now. “Yusuke, Futaba, Makoto, Haru… And Morgana.” He looked down to the cat in his lap, petting him gently. “I made them all swear not to tell anyone-- _especially_ you.”

“But why me?”

Ren looked up at him after that, and for the first time Ryuji noticed just how much emotion Ren hid behind those glasses. Dark grey eyes unlike anything else Ryuji had ever seen showed so much emotion before, but now? He couldn’t exactly read his neighbor. There was so much to take in. Worry, fear, anger, affection… He was a mystery to Ryuji-- he always _had_ been.

“You’re _different_.”

What.

“What _kinda_ different?”

He felt his heartbeat quicken, and his cheeks began heating up. That was a… Pretty loaded question, huh? Ren could take it any way he wanted to. But if he answered it with feelings as deep as Ryuji’s, then what?

Where would they go from here?

If Ren _did_ have feelings for him, would Ryuji want to reciprocate? He’d only recently come to terms with his own feelings for his neighbor. But after this? Could he trust being so close to him?

Who was he kidding?

Of _course_ he could trust Ren. He _always_ could.

Except when he was sick, it seemed.

Speaking of, he didn’t hear Ren coughing or sniffling. Perhaps his cold had gone away...

“I can’t explain it.” He said after a moment of silence. “You just seem so fragile sometimes. Not physically, but _mentally_. You’re so emotional, and I just…” He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “I’d hate to disappoint you. Or make you upset. In any sense of the being.”

Oh. Well now Ryuji felt stupid. Where his heart was once beating so fast, it slowed down quite considerably. This place certainly wasn’t the right one for a confession. Not at all.

He was stupid to think that Ren might have feelings for him too. He knew that his neighbor wasn’t _straight_ , but there was no need to get his hopes up… Right?

He took a deep breath, then sipping at his hot chocolate again.

It was seriously good.

And it was also a seriously good minor distraction.

Ryuji was quiet only long enough to swallow his drink.

“I got a couple o’ questions for ya. If ya want to stay friends, you gotta answer them.” There were a few boundaries Ryuji had to make. Of course, there was one boundary that Ren could _never_ cross. And if he did, Ryuji would have to cut off ties with him.

As much as he hated the thought that he might have to.

Ren did nod though, looking to Ryuji.

“Have you ever shot anyone?”

Ren was quiet. Far too quiet for Ryuji’s liking. It made him feel sick-- stomach lurching as he had to swallow the sour taste in his mouth. He had to ask this. He _needed_ to. 

If only for his own safety.

Ren’s gaze was on his coffee again though, his hands gripping the ceramic so hard that his knuckles turned white. “Yes.”

Oh. That answer _hurt_. So he _had_ shot someone…

The next question was worse. Ryuji was terrified for the answer to this one, but he had to ask. Honestly, their entire relationship relied on this one question.

The previous was just a warm up. And Ryuji didn’t like what he’d heard so far.

“Have you ever _killed_ anyone?”

“No.”

Ren’s answer was squick-- desperate, and he seemed out of breath as he answered it. His hands twitched on his mug, and Ryuji felt that he had the urge to reach out and touch him. But Ren seemed too scared to do so.

“Are you lying?”

“No!” Ren was looking up at Ryuji again, his chest heaving. “I’ve _never_ killed anyone.”

But why should Ryuji believe him?

Then again, he really didn’t have a reason _not_ to.

Sighing, Ryuji reached out. He put his hand on Ren’s and gave it a small squeeze.

He was quiet for a few moments, his gaze caught on Ren’s as they just watched each other. IT was… Not as awkward as before, but Ryuji had grabbed Ren’s hand on such an impulse that…

_What was he supposed to do now?_

Ren was looking at him so expectantly, his mouth open just slightly, and if Ryuji could trust his own eyes, he swore that his neighbor was flushing a little-- short heavy breaths still falling past thin lips.

And then he felt his own face heat up slightly, and he quickly pulled his hand away, setting it in his lap again.

“I… I forgive ya.” And he did. Ren would never purposefully hurt him, right? He’d always been gentle and kind, and… Ugh. Ryuji didn’t need to think about how much his heart ached right now. He just wanted these answers and he got them. This was all he wanted. Now he could head home. Right?

“Thank you.”

He looked over at Ren one last time. He was smiling a little bit, chin in his hand as he looked up towards Ryuji.

“I was worried that you’d never want to see me again, you know. I promise I won’t do that again.”

There he was, always trying to be reliable. And cool. What a bastard.

Ryuji felt himself bite his lip.

“Hey,” and he spotted Ren shifting a little bit, causing him to look in his direction once again. “Haru texted me earlier. You’re still coming, right? Even after what happened?”

Coming? Coming to what?

_Shit_.

After everything that’d gone on, Ryuji had completely forgotten the plans Ren’s group of friends had invited him to.

“I, uh…” He sighed for what felt like the millionth time. “Yeah. I’ll come. Tomorrow, right?”

And with that, Ren nodded, his smile growing. “Tomorrow.”

_Karaoke_.


	28. Aria

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am going to apologize for disappointing you in advance. This took far too long for such a lame chapter. I was going to add more to it as well since there was another point that I would have liked to add in here, but the chapter is long already OTL
> 
> (Hopefully you'll) Enjoy!

Karaoke? Ryuji could do karaoke. He hadn't done anything like that in years though-- not since back when he was in high school with his old group of friends. It was a lot more popular in Japan than it was here in America, but karaoke was always the same no matter where you went.

Right?

Always with the same current songs that were popular, as well as some classics that everyone seemed to know off the top of their head-- despite how much you liked the song. It would probably be a different selection in Japan, but Ryuji was sure he'd have heard the songs at least a few times.

If anything from the playlists that they played at his job.

There were a lot of places in the city that Ryuji didn't know about. Ren had really been the one to get him to go to different locations, and to try out some new stuff. It was no surprise that he didn't go out anywhere when he didn't know anyone, but now? It was like a whole new world.

It wasn't like the karaoke place was super close by though. It was quite a walk away. Ren insisted that they walk (of course in the freezing cold), and who was Ryuji to deny him that? They were in public, so it wasn't like he was going to do anything weird, and it was a hell of a lot cheaper than taking any sort of public transportation.

The wind sure as hell sucked though. But what else was new?

It'd felt like ages before they'd gotten to the bar. There was a (very) short queue out front, but by the time they'd reached the place, everyone had already gone inside. Except for the bouncer, that was.

Huh. They must be serving alcohol out in the open here. Kinda like a normal bar, huh?

Ren sure did take him to a lot of places with bouncers…

They had to show their ids to the man, but then they were let inside-- a hell of a lot faster than they’d been back when they went to the club. He didn’t feel like the guy had been studying his face nearly as hard either. But then again, it was a bit brighter here than it’d been at the club.

The sun was still setting, after all.

The duo wandered in, and the host at a podium just beyond the door pointed them in the direction of another door off to the side. 

“Through there and up the stairs.” She said as she flashed them both a smile. 

And with that, Ren reached out and grabbed for the door handle. He held it open wide for Ryuji, and then once the blonde was inside, slipped in behind him. They were immediately met with a staircase to the right, so Ryuji turned and began the small trip up them. 

“Hey,” he began as they reached about halfway up the stairs. “You said the others were here already, right?” He asked, turning slightly to look at Ren as they walked. 

His neighbor just nodded, phone in his hand as he looked over the screen. “They should be. We’re late.”

That had Ryuji frowning. _Late_? But that was all Ren’s fault! He’d taken forever to get ready. He was always trying to impress _someone_ , but Ryuji had never seen him dress so casually.

Where his usual attire could be described as business casual, this outfit was… Different. Layering a black long sleeved shirt under a white one with stars plastered all over it? Ryuji had never guessed that Ren had sneakers as well. Not to mention the blonde’s surprise when he found out Ren owned _leather pants_.

Ren was full of surprises, huh? 

It looked like he’d already taken his coat off though-- probably when Ryuji’s back had been turned when they’d started up the stairs. Ryuji had decided to wait at least until they got to the room…

Once they’d gotten to the top of the stairs, a landing lead them into the main karaoke hall. Ryuji could hear someone singing now even through the closed door at the top. It didn’t sound _good_ in the slightest-- in fact whoever was singing sounded horrible. But who was Ryuji to judge? He’d probably sound just as bad.

It was a good thing everyone had decided to rent out a private room for a couple of hours.

Opening up the door, Ryuji slipped inside-- holding the door open for Ren behind himself. The singing of the man by the bar was louder than ever, and Ryuji could see him looking at the large screen that showed the lyrics. It was a song he wasn’t familiar with, and he really didn’t want to be after hearing this guy singing it.

“Ren! Ryuji! Over here!” The voice calling his name was familiar, and turning to the right, we spotted Ann in the doorway of one of the private rooms, waving and hoping for Ren and Ryuji's attention.

Ren was already waving at her though, and Ryuji felt a hand on his lower back. It was probably Ren's, because it was slowly guiding him towards the room.

He wasn't going to lie. As weird as it was to have Ren's hand in a place that felt oddly _intimate_ , it wasn't a bad feeling. It was nice. Comforting. And Ryuji could feel his cheeks turning a slight shade of pink as he ducked his head down slightly.

They made it to the room without further issue though, and once he'd gotten to the doorway, Ryuji saw that it was... Really busy. There were quite a few familiar faces crammed into the small room-- Everyone from Yusuke to Makoto was there. Hell, even Yuuki was hanging out, and Ryuji spotted Goro sitting in a chair by himself on the opposite side of the room from the door.

And if he recalled correctly, that was Shiho on the edge of the couch-- thoroughly being squished by Futaba. Ryuji felt himself chuckle, and went to greet the female when Ann rushed past him and slipped onto Shiho's lap. Oh. Right. They were married.

Ryuji felt so strange in knowing that two of his middle school classmates were already married when he could barely hold together a damn relationship.

He hadn't even dated anyone since coming to the states.

And then he felt his cheeks heat up slightly again. What? Was he feeling _jealous_? Hell no! There was no way he was feeling jealous!

He didn't want to cuddle with anyone like those two were doing on the couch! No kissing or hand holding or anything! Nope!

…

Ryuji hated how lonely he felt sometimes. But he couldn’t just admit his feelings to Ren like that-- not after what had happened. Ryuji still needed time.

Regardless, the two females looked cute together, and Ryuji waited for Shiho to stop tickling Ann gently before he gave her a smile. 

“Hey! Long time no see!” He said with a wave.

“It’s good to see you again too, Ryuji.” She said, then blinking in confusion when she found Futaba leaning over her lap as well. 

“Took you both long enough to get here!” She said, chin in her hand as she leaned atop Ann. “We thought you wouldn’t show.”

Ren gave a chuckle at that. “Sorry. We got a little tied up.”

And that brought a frown to Futaba’s face. Of course, she looked like she didn’t believe a word of it. “No, you just didn’t think you looked pretty enough to leave the house.” She knew him all too well, huh?

It had Ryuji laughing a little bit.

Ren slipped farther into the room after that-- making his way over to Yuuki and sitting next to the eager male easily. He tossed his jacket onto the sofa behind himself, and Ryuji noted that he seemed to be speaking with Yuuki. About what, Ryuji didn’t know. There was so much chatter going on in the room that he was unsure of where to focus. He hadn’t been somewhere so busy in a long while.

Or at least in a place busy enough where he genuinely wanted to speak with everyone.

But he wasn’t sure where to sit. These were all Ren’s friends, after all, and as much as he liked them all… Did he know anyone well enough to offer to sit next to them?

Well, he knew _Ann_ well. But she was currently busy with her wife. And Ryuji wasn’t sure if he wanted to bother them. Or have to sit next to the cutesy couple. Futaba seemed happy enough to sit there though.

He looked around the room. 

Ann, Shiho, Futaba, Yuuki, and Ren were all squished onto the sofa directly facing the television screen though. There was _definitely_ not enough room for him to sit there-- as much as he’d rather sit near Ren, he really didn’t think that squeezing his ass onto the busiest seat in the room was the best option.

He sure as hell didn’t want to sit next to Goro either. He was on a one-person chair and sat on the opposite side of Ren as Yuuki.

Pardon Ryuji for still being a bit pissed off at him. He was right though. His feelings probably _had_ been justified. But it looked like Ryuji had been caught staring at him, because Goro offered him a small smile and a wave.

Ryuji returned the favor, albeit a little awkwardly.

Makoto was sitting in another armchair by herself and speaking with Yusuke and Haru, who shared a sofa. There seemed to be enough room for him to join in there…

Okay, yeah. That was probably his best option.

He’d sit on the sofa next to Haru. Hopefully on the end seat.

Slipping over to the couch and around one of the coffee tables in the room, Ryuji planted himself next to the female on the couch. She seemed to cease her conversation with Yusuke and Makoto immediately (though she appeared to be listening more so that actively speaking), and turned to Ryuji with a smile. 

“Hello, Ryuji!” She said, folding her hands in her lap.

“Hey!” Ryuji wormed himself out of his hoodie and then tossed it behind himself on the sofa (much like it looked like everyone else was doing with their coats), and then leaned back. He had one arm on the back of the sofa behind Haru as he looked at her, tugging down the shirt that dared rise when he snaked the hoodie from over his head. “How are ya?” 

“I’ve been well, thank you. I’m glad you could make it.” She said, sitting back in her seat a bit. Haru did look adorable today. In fact, everyone looked so comfortable and casual compared to how Ryuji usually saw them.

Why did all of Ren’s friends like to dress up so much when they went out? They looked a lot more comfortable sitting here in sweats and hoodies-- t-shirts and leggings than ever before. 

Wait. 

Everyone seemed to have dressed down a bit, right? Did… Did Ryuji not get that memo?

Looking down at his own clothing, the blonde frowned. Well, he _was_ just wearing a t-shirt and jeans. He didn’t look (or feel) out of place at all.

But it was seriously nice to see everyone dressed down.

Before Ryuji could respond to Haru, he found a paper being handed in his direction, as well as with a pen laying on top. Ann gave him a wink when he looked up at her while she held the paper.

Slowly, he took it and looked it over.

“Drink orders!” She stated. Oh. Apparently she had noted the confusion on Ryuji’s face. 

That, or she just felt like explaining. 

Ryuji looked over the list at all of the check marked items on it. Of course there was the option of alcohol, but he quickly skipped over that section in favor of looking for something that he’d enjoy more.

Soda sounded great.

But he did get to peek at everyone else’s orders while he looked through the slip of paper. Beer seemed to be the drink of choice, though a couple of sodas were marked down as well.

Ryuji added a tally mark next to the cola and then handed the paper off to Haru for her to look it over when a voice caught his attention.

“Guys, really? _Here_?”

Ryuji looked over to the opposite side of the room. Ren had lit up a cigarette and was offering his lighter to Goro, who also had one of those disgusting things in his mouth. Gross. At least he didn’t have to sit next to it.

Ren did hold up what looked like a complimentary ashtray though. “I didn’t have one on the way.” Well, he wasn’t lying.

“Come on! Let’s just have fun!”

It looked like no one really wanted to deal with the nagging though, but Ryuji just rolled his eyes and sat back in his seat again.

This sure was a huge group to have crammed into one tiny room though. He wondered just what everyone would pick for their songs.

Or if they would even have time to sing all of them.

By the time their drinks had been delivered to the room on a tray and everyone had decided on a song or two to add to the playlist, everyone had moved around the room to different locations. Ryuji found himself on the middle couch along with a select few others. At least he’d gotten to snag a seat next to Ren this time. As nice as everyone was, he did feel less awkward sitting next to the guy that had invited him.

It was strange though. Some people were pretty touchy with each other, and if Ryuji wasn’t completely over reading the mood, he assumed there were a couple of other couples in the room. 

As happy as he was for everyone, Ryuji did feel a little lonely thinking about it. He _wanted_ to date-- don’t get him wrong!

But timing was essential. And so was finding someone he was that interested in.

He spared a glance over at Ren beside himself, who was focused on trying to fit one of the covers onto the microphone in his hand. He seemed to be having a bit of trouble with it-- so much so that Goro had to reach over Yuuki to take the damn thing and fit it on correctly. 

It was funny. While Ren seemed to do certain tasks that the average human would find difficult with little to no problems, he certainly had difficulty with the simpler tasks.

Goro had to help him with the cover to the microphone, but Ren only laughed to himself when it was returned to his hands-- it was as if he wasn’t affected by just how much of a child he seemed for being unable to carry out easier activities.

Ryuji pinched the bridge of his nose as he sighed. He really needed to get his thoughts about Ren together.

“Are you all right?” The voice in front of himself-- Yusuke, asked as he was bending down to pick up his glass. By the look on his face, he was looking directly at Ryuji, and the blonde blinked a few times. Shit. He didn’t need to be getting carried away in thought like that with everyone around.

“ ‘M fine.” He said as he sat up, forcing a small smile onto his lips. “Just thinkin’. Got my head achin'."

Yusuke hummed over the rim of his soda, his eyes fixed on Ryuji. "That seems dangerous. Perhaps you should go back to giving your mind a rest-- as usual."

What the fuck.

Yusuke was an asshole.

Frowning, Ryuji’s eyebrows knit downwards. “I can think just fine, _thanks_.”

Yusuke just chuckled at that, finally sipping from his drink. He swallowed before he spoke. “I’m well aware. I was just suggesting you limit yourself.” 

He’d forgotten that his last encounter with Yusuke hadn’t been so… _kind_ either.

“Yusuke!” He heard Futaba whine from the side couch-- drawing out the vowels in his name. “Move it! Your big head’s in the way!”

Yusuke was frowning as he glanced (presumably) to the female. He didn’t say anything though, just heading over to sit in his spot on the couch beside her again.

Well, at least he didn’t have to deal with that guy’s comments for at least a little bit now.

But now it was time to focus on singing.

Most of the group seemed to pick out popular pop songs. Ryuji would have guessed that everyone would pick songs that were fun and lively, and no one disappointed. Even Goro had picked out something fun to sing.

Most of the songs were in English, but some were in Japanese-- apparently popular songs from back home. Ryuji really needed to get caught up to the current songs from his home country.

But then it seemed like it was Ren’s turn to sing, and he decided to stand up for his performance. He pushed himself from the sofa beside Ryuji after taking the microphone from Yuuki, and slipped over to stand in front of the screen that they read the words off of. Huh? Was he going to put on a show or something too? What a show off.

Ryuji could feel himself roll his eyes.

The song that Ren picked was a love song, it seemed. Soothing and peppy to the ears, Ren’s voice carried on just a few moments into the song. It was… Weird. Ryuji found himself leaning forward a little bit, arms resting on his knees as he watched Ren sing. 

His voice wasn’t what Ryuji had expected it to be. Soft and (incredibly) smooth, Ren seemed to carry out the song perfectly. He knew every line by heart and if Ryuji was being honest, he’d say that the song sounded like… It was _meant_ for Ren.

It was like his voice was perfectly suited for it-- complimenting the notes well and carrying out the melody with ease. Everyone was silent while Ren sang.

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting. Ren was always a smooth talker. But his singing voice? It was truly something that sounded almost haunting.

Ryuji wasn’t sure why though, but something possessed him to look more closely at Ren. His gaze was set on someone in particular-- but _who_?

It certainly wasn’t Ryuji. As close as he was looking to the blonde, it definitely wasn’t at _him_ , but…

His gaze traveled over to the person beside himself.

_Oh_. Ren was looking at _Ann_.

But why? Ryuji knew that they had been together for a while, but they’d broken up a few years back. Ann had made it clear that she wasn’t interested in Ren, but then Ryuji remembered something.

_Ren had proposed to Ann_.

Ren was _obviously_ in love with Ann enough to ask her to marry him. He’d planned out everything too-- or so the blonde was told.

He had a ring, he got down on one knee, and was promptly turned away in front of a small crowd of people. 

Sure, Ren had never seemed offended by the notion-- perhaps he’d just gotten over the embarrassment of it after a bit of time. But it still didn't change the fact that he'd _done_ it-- nor did it change the fact that here he was, in front of everyone, singing a very obvious love song right to Ann. And then a thought suddenly came to Ryuji.

_It was very likely that Ren was still in love with Ann_.

That thought had Ryuji swallowing hard. What if he _did_ still love her? Ryuji hadn't thought about that possibility until now...

He found himself frowning as Ren leaned forward onto the coffee table. There was a smirk on his face as he leaned forward onto the coffee table, palm pressed to the wooden top while he got as close to Ann as he could.

That stupid shit-eating grin was really pissing Ryuji off.

He couldn't help it though!

He'd just gotten to understanding his own feelings. He was interested in Ren. And as dangerous and terrifying as his neighbor could be, he was still someone that Ryuji was interested in pursuing…

He hated this. That angry, resentful, heart-aching feeling that coursed through his body- emanating from his chest. 

_Why_? Why was Ren so blatantly flirting with someone who was _married_?

_And in front of her wife too._

Not only was it infuriating, but it was also making Ryuji _uncomfortable_.

But then, before Ryuji could do anything about it, Ann was leaning forward.She reached out and took Ren’s nose between two of her fingers and gave him a hardy pinch.

Ren couldn’t seem to continue singing after that, instead chuckling before pulling away from Ann and then standing upright. He began singing again, swaying his hips to the tune and dancing around the room, looking as smug as ever.

But Ryuji was thoroughly confused.

“You’re never going to get away from that song, huh?” He heard Shiho ask from the other side of Ann, and the blonde just laughed a little to herself, pressing a hand to her mouth.

Huh? What did that even mean? Raising an eyebrow, Ryuji spared a glance over to them just as his neighbor finished his song, and thus, finishing their time at the karaoke bar.

Ren invited him out to another location after everyone said their goodbyes and dispersed. Ryuji wasn’t sure if he even wanted to go.


	29. Afterparty

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OTL

He went anyway. 

Against his better judgement, Ryuji decided that he should spend more time with Ren. What was he going to do? Tell him no and then walk that whole way home alone? 

He really didn’t like that idea.

As frustrated as he was with Ren, he didn’t like the thought of having to walk all that way alone. They were _neighbors_. It only made sense to travel together, right? And he could save money on an uber if that was how they decided to go home too. That was, unless they decided to take a train home. It was probably the second cheapest option.

Ren said their next destination wasn’t too far away anyway.

Ryuji’s hands were stuffed into the pockets of his coat as they walked, and he absently kicked at a rock on the sidewalk. It wasn’t necessarily busy on the street-- in fact, it was a little quiet. It gave the duo a bit of space to spread out so they wouldn’t have to walk on top of each other like they did when the streets were full. 

He still wasn’t sure what to say to his neighbor though. What _could_ he say? With how he acted with Ann, Ryuji wasn’t sure if he was teasing her or if he actually still had feelings for her. 

Ryuji was hoping it would be the first. Not only for the feelings he believed that he harbored for Ren, but also because Ren was a natural jokester. He _loved_ to tease people. Ryuji was really hoping that his gut feelings were wrong with this.

If Ren still had feelings for Ann, he wasn’t sure if he could pursue a relationship with his neighbor.

He was still pissed off at himself for falling in love with his neighbor. This really was like some sort of cheesy romance comedy. It sucked. Ryuji could kick himself for feeling like he did.

He rubbed his face with one hand though, sighing a little bit. Hopefully Ren would be bringing him someone fun and then they could head home soon.

Ryuji still wasn’t sure if he actually _wanted_ to go to this second location with Ren.

But he would go. He’d said he would. And Ren seemed to be in a pretty good mood after they hung out with everyone.

He’d humor him. Just for tonight.

It didn’t take them long to get to their location. Ren stopped outside of a small alcove, looking inside of it with his hands in the pockets of his coat. If Ryuji could tell anything about his posture from behind, he sure did seem pleased with himself.

The alcove was lit up with a dull shade of purple. Inside of it held a staircase, and at the far end was a door. Frowning, Ryuji looked to the sign hanging above the entryway.

_Crossroads_.

Huh. Ryuji had never heard of this place before. Then again, Ren took him to a lot of places that he’d never been to.

He wasn’t sure what he was expecting when they first walked up the the place, but it sure as hell was a bar. The moment they walked in through the door Ryuji noticed the bar along the right wall.

It was pretty dark inside-- the lights dimmed low. Though he could definitely make out bottles lining the walls and chairs and tables in the middle of the floor. Smooth jazz played through the speakers that hung near the ceiling, and the bar seemed… Relatively quiet. There were a few patrons, but they all seemed to be keeping to themselves. 

Hell, even the bar area was pretty empty save for one woman sitting at it and flagging down the bartender.

Ryuji _really_ didn’t like bars. But Ren kept insisting on bringing him to them, huh? And this one was right after the karaoke bar too…

He must really like Ren for doing this…

Ren lead him over to the bar though, but he took a moment to greet the woman sitting at it. Placing a hand on her back, He leaned forward onto the bar, smiling at her. 

“ _Again?_ I thought Lala was trying to get you to quit drinking.” He said, chuckling after he was playfully shoved away by the woman.

“What’s it to _you_?” She asked, frowning at Ryuji’s neighbor. “I didn’t ask for _your_ opinion.”

Ren just chuckled again after that, turning to Ryuji with a wide grin on his face. “Ryuji, this is Ichiko. Ichiko, Ryuji.” He said, sparing a glance back to the woman. 

“Oh!” She said, drawing out the word. “So _this_ is your infamous neighbor, huh?” She asked. A smiled slipped onto her face as she turned to face the duo, looking Ryuji up and down. 

Why did all of Ren’s friends always have to stare at him so intensely?

Ryuji frowned, slipping his hands into his pockets. Ren really didn’t need to talk about him so often. All of his friends made it seem like he spoke about Ryuji non stop.

Should he be flattered?

If Ren spoke about him a lot, then that meant that he thought fondly of Ryuji, right? No one ever really said that Ren spoke in a _negative_ way about him, nor did he ever get the feeling that anyone _thought_ negatively about him. Save for Goro, that was. But they had a pretty rough first meeting.

Spinning around on her stool, Ichiko waved down someone at the counter-- appearing to be the bartender. “Oh, Lala!” She called, her voice high pitched and hand raised in the air and waving enthusiastically. “Ren brought his _friend_! Come meet him!”

Ryuji could hear Ren clearing his throat from beside himself, and it seemed to catch the attention of Ichiko, who turned to face the duo again. Chuckling, she covered her mouth with one hand. 

“Oh. Sorry!” Sorry? For _what_?

Well, she _did_ put that strange emphasis on the notion of _friend_. Or was Ryuji just thinking too much into this?

The bartender finally joined them though, and for the first time, Ryuji could get a good look at her. She was tall-- almost as tall as Ren, with short dark purple hair and… Pretty heavy makeup. She was quite a sight, really. All of that makeup really seemed like a bit much, but for some reason… The look just seemed to fit her. Huh.

“Oh, so you’re Ryuji.” Wow. Her voice was a bit deeper than Ryuji had expected. Blinking, he just nodded at the notion. “I’m charmed.” And then she turned to look at Ren. “I assume this means you won’t be serving customers tonight?”

Leaning forward onto the bar, Ren gave the bartender a quick wink. “I’ll dress up for you again soon, Lala.” He said. And before Ryuji could even think to be confused, Ren was standing upright, hands on Ryuji’s shoulders and urging him towards one of the tables off to the left. 

“Bring us a couple of drinks? Something virgin for him.”

Virgin? Oh. Yeah. Something without alcohol. Ryuji was about to slap Ren for saying something like that so casually. He had no idea of Ryuji was a virgin or not!

And he most certainly was _not_ a virgin! It’d been a while since his last time, yeah, but it didn’t mean he was inexperienced!

He was quickly ushered to one of the few tables. It was a small table and had two chairs set up around it. Ren pulled one of them out for Ryuji and then slipped around the table and to his own seat, sliding into that. Huh. What a gentleman, Ryuji supposed.

But then he did sit down as well, pulling himself towards the table a little bit. He leaned on top of it, looking over at Ren.

“So, uh…” He began, taking a glance around the small room. “You come here often?”

One of those disgusting shit-eating grins spread onto Ren’s face, and Ryuji instantly regretted the question he’d asked. He was sure he knew exactly what Ren was going to point ou-- “Oh? Are you trying to _flirt_ with me, Ryu?”

Frowning, Ryuji slammed his hand down on the table. “T-that’s not what I meant and you know it!” Ugh! He could feel just how hot his cheeks had turned, and he silently cursed at himself for feeling so embarrassed. Why did Ren always have to tease him like this? It wasn’t fair! He was just trying to make some conversation!

Ren chuckled after that, and he leaned forward onto the table, his chin leaning on the palm of his hand. He still had that gross smirk on his face though, and Ryuji had the sudden urge to reach out and slap it right off of his face.

“Sometimes.”

Oh, so it looked like Ren was actually going to answer him, huh?

“I help out here sometimes. Some simple bartending. Can’t make a drink to save my life, but I’m _really_ good at washing the glasses.”

“Don’t be modest, dear.”

Holy shit. Ryuji’s heart jumped to his throat at Lala’s voice. He hadn’t even heard her walking up to them! Was she a ninja or something? Jeez.

She did laugh though, pulling one of the glasses from the tray she carried and placing it in front of Ryuji. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you.”

And with that, Ren’s drink was placed in front of him as well. Beer? He sure did drink a lot of it. After seeing him with a bottle so many times, Ryuji had long come to the conclusion that it was his drink of choice. 

And why not? He looked so natural drinking his shitty, malted beverage. 

“Lala just keeps me around because I’m pretty to look at.”

Grinning again, though much more pleased with himself, Ren leaned in almost naturally to the petting he received atop his head from the bartender. What a cat.

“Don’t cause trouble tonight, you hear?” Oh, so Lala wasn’t a stranger to scolding Ren, huh? Ryuji really needed learn how to scold him too-- without getting flustered, that is.

Lala disappeared after that though, and Ren turned back to Ryuji.

Well, he hadn’t been lying though. Ren _was_ pretty to look at. Shining black hair, long eyelashes… His face was angular and handsome, and there was always some dark and mysterious glint in those beautiful grey eyes. Hell, it was almost scary how attractive Ren was sometimes. 

Ryuji leaned forward onto the table-- mimicking the pose that Ren had. Without the stupid grin.

“Y’sure are comfortable here, huh?” He asked, eyeing Ren suspiciously. 

“You could say that. I just feel… At home. In a lot of places. It’s strange.” 

Strange? But it was nice to feel at home in a lot of places, right? Ren had a lot of friends, and if he could be himself in so many different places, then that meant he was confident in himself and the people he cared about, right?

Ryuji found himself frowning, blinking a few times.

“I’ll spare you the details.” Oh, so Ren seemed to have picked up on his confusion, huh? He could read Ryuji like a damn book… “I moved around a lot. Didn’t have many friends until I came to America.”

Wow. That felt familiar. Ryuji had never fit in so well until Ren started introducing him to all of these people.

“I’ve been at the apartment a lot longer than any other place since I left Japan.”

Huh? But he hadn’t even lived at the apartment for a whole year-- to Ryuji’s knowledge. Before they met, he could only recall the smoke smell for a few months prior. Ryuji had lived there for a while though…

“You must really like it at the apartment then, huh?” He asked, chuckling a little to himself.

Ren frowned after that, his gaze meeting Ryuji’s sharply. There was an intense look in his eyes that Ryuji hadn’t recalled seeing before. Ren seemed suddenly… Really serious. 

“I have a reason to stay in one place now.”

A… A reason? What on earth could that be? Ryuji could feel a cold shiver run up his spine after that, and his cheeks flushed slightly. Why was he suddenly feeling so embarrassed? And not only embarrassed, but he was also feeling… _Scared_.

What could the reason be for Ren to want to stay for such a long time? If he was used to moving…

Ryuji wasn’t sure if he wanted to know or not.

Clearing his throat, Ryuji decided to change the subject. 

“Your friend over there.” He said, sparing a glance to Ichiko-- who was half-leant over the bar and looking like she was nagging at the bartender. “She sure is somethin’, huh?” He asked.

A smile spread over Ren’s face then, and he chuckled. “She is. She’s always been wild.”

Well, she really seemed the type. She didn’t seem like a bad person though-- just maybe a bit to handle sometimes.

“She likes Yuuki a lot-- probably because she can get a lot of information out of him.” Huh? Information? But like _what_? Why did she suddenly seem sketchy? And Yuuki too! What were they both up to?

Ren sighed after that though, shaking his head a little as he sat up. “Yuuki seems to think she’s a bit of a burden. Reporters can be pretty invasive, and Ichiko doesn’t hide her nature.”

Oh. So she was a _reporter_. But… What did that say about _Yuuki_? What kind of information was she getting out of him?

Ren didn’t seem to want to elaborate though, instead just looking to Ryuji with a small smile.

“Uh, yeah. I kinda noticed.” With her comment about Ryuji being Ren’s _friend_. She definitely seemed to come to some pretty funny conclusions, right?

…

Right?

Ryuji laughed a little bit to himself, picking up his drink from the table. He finally got a good look at it though. Pink and with a cherry on top of the ice, he frowned.

This was a damn Shirley Temple! Lala was just as much of an asshole as Ren, wasn’t she?!

Frowning, he looked over to Lala at the bar, who seemed pleased with herself as she waved at his obvious scowl. Oh, she knew _exactly_ what she was doing! Why couldn’t Ren have told her he wanted a soda or something?

Ryuji wasn’t some damn child.

“Yeah…” He muttered as he went back to looking at his drink. As childish as it was, Shirley Temples really were tasty… And he was going to drink it. Not because he was a kid! This was out of spite! 

“I mean, with the way she said what she did earlier, you know-- _friend_ , it seemed like she was implying we were something more than that, huh? It’s funny. I mean, it’s not like you want us to be anythin’ else.”

Shit. Why did he have to say that? He could feel his face turning five-hundred shades of red. His face was hot, and his neck and ears were quick to follow. He had to look away from Ren in embarrassment though, sipping at his drink as a bit of a distraction after a small bout of nervous laughter.

There was no taking his words back now though. What was said was said-- even though he instantly regretted his words…

But Ren’s silence was… Terrifying.

He was almost _painfully_ quiet, and Ryuji’s gaze darted back to his neighbor in a flash.

And then they were both quiet. Even the bar seemed quiet. Ryuji couldn’t hear a damn thing in the entire place. Even the music was falling on deaf ears.

And then Ryuji’s eyes widened in realization and suddenly his drink was trying to kill him, and he choked, sitting upright. He covered his mouth with one hand as he placed the drink down almost a little too roughly, coughing into the hand at the front of his mouth.

“H-holy shit!” He managed to stutter between coughs. And if he thought his face was red before, then now? His whole body felt like it was on fire. 

_Ren had been far too quiet about this for it not to be true._

“S-she meant it! She meant it?” Ryuji was still coughing, but it was quieter and less strong than before, and he pat his chest.

Shit.

_Shit._

Ren was refusing to meet his gaze. Looking down at the hands in his lap, he seemed almost dejected. It was like he thought that Ryuji had totally turned him down. He just looked… So upset.

And then he spoke. And Ryuji felt his heart shatter.

“I like you. A lot.” His voice was so small and almost fragile sounding. It was like he was afraid to speak, and Ryuji could feel his shoulders dropping at just the sad sound in his tone.

Ren took a deep breath, his gaze finally meeting Ryuji’s again just as the blonde finally caught his breath. Mouth agape, he stared at Ren with wide eyes. 

“I’ve hid it for a while, but I’m tired of keeping it inside. I’ve never felt like this about anyone before. It’s just something that I never _expected_ to feel.” And then he looked away, hands clenched into fists on the table in front of himself. “Sure, I’ve _thought_ that I’ve been in love before, but there’s something so different-- so _special_ about you. 

“I can’t explain it, but when we met, I felt something about you. I felt like we were _connected_. But now? I don’t know.” He leaned forward then, head in his hands as he ran them through his hair in an almost frazzled manner.

“Love. That’s the only way I know how to describe it. I love you. I’m _in_ love with you, Ryuji.”

He wasn’t expecting this! Not tonight! Well, not _ever_! But especially not tonight!

But the words fell from Ren’s mouth like some sort of word vomit.

Ryuji’s chest ached. It was painful. Dreadful. Exciting.

All of the feelings he had? All of the things he was feeling… He couldn’t believe that Ren was feeling the same exact things as him.

His heart raced and it felt like the color had drained from his face. He had no idea what to say-- what to _do_.

Without thinking, his hand rocketed out. He grasped onto Ren’s hand firmly and held onto it tightly-- giving it a squeeze as the wide eyes of his neighbor met his own.

Ryuji swallowed a lump in his throat as he suddenly found it difficult to breathe.

“It’s… It’s okay.” He said, feeling a smile that he couldn’t control forcing it’s way onto his face.

“I love you too, Ren.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're finally getting to the point of this fanfiction! I hope you all enjoy this, because you deserve it for reading this far.


	30. Getting Ready

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really good at stalling on this story, huh?

It was kind of an awkward scenario where they stood. Were they boyfriends? Were they just love interests? Ryuji wasn’t sure.

They hadn’t gone on any dates or anything. They hadn’t really discussed the situation much farther than their confessions. Sure, they held hands on their walk home, but after that?

Life had just gone back to normal.

Ryuji wasn’t sure if he was disappointed or happy about the scenario. He was happy that their relationship was kept well. He still saw Ren on an almost daily basis, and they were still _pretty_ friendly. Overall, it was great.

But they’d confessed, and yet they hadn’t actually done anything further.

Hell, a kiss would be nice. But was it uncalled for? Was it too early for that? A date sure as hell would be a great starting place. But how would he go about asking Ren out? It’ been a couple of weeks since karaoke, so was it too weird (or late) to ask him out of the blue?

Nah. Definitely not. In fact, Ren might just be waiting for Ryuji to ask him out! At least that was what Ryuji was _hoping_.

Instead of worrying, he found himself at Ren’s door, knocking gently on the wood to garner his neighbor’s attention. It worked after a few moments too, and Ren was smiling as he opened the door to his apartment, Morgana tucked in one of his arms.

His smile had grown upon spotting Ryuji, and he let go of the door to pet his at.

“Hey.” He said, then turning in towards the house a bit. “Come in. It’s freezing out there.”

He was right. The hallway was cold as hell, and Ryuji could feel himself hiver slightly when Ren suggested moving to a warmer location. Tugging his sweatshirt around his body more tightly, Ryuji wandered into the apartment.

Maybe there was something wrong with the heat in the hallway. It wasn’t unheard of in this place-- the heater had broken down before too. In fact, Ryuji had remembered that it’d happened a couple of times the year before. But at least things seemed to be decent enough in the apartments.

Then again, Ryuji had been relying on his space heater a bit more than usual.

Ren seemed to have the same idea too. A large space heater was seated in the living room, and the apartment felt a lot nicer than the hall.

Hearing the door close behind himself, Ryuji turned to meet Ren’s gaze. It was good to see him, really. It’d been a couple of days, but honestly? Ryuji’s fingers twitched in anticipation. He really just wanted to reach out and play with Ren’s hair, hold his hand, pet his cheek, _something_.

But they had to be a real couple before that though, right? Ryuji just missed affection _so much_ , and it was really starting to affect his thoughts-- _especially_ since the confession.

Morgana dropped to the ground as Ren made his way deeper into the apartment, stopping just in front of Ryuji. “I didn’t expect you.” He said, tugging his sweater around himself closer. Despite the heaters, it was still a little nippy inside the room.

Ryuji just shrugged a little bit. “I wasn’t plannin’ on comin’ by. But I thought you might want to… _You know_. Do somethin’.” It was a lie. OF course Ryuji had been thinking about visiting for a while. But that wasn’t something he necessarily _needed_ to tell Ren, right?

Playing a little hard to get was fun.

Ren pushed his glasses up on the bridge of his nose, his smile lingering. “Is that so?” He asked, and Ryuji _swore_ he saw a smirk spread onto the other male’s lips.

Okay, so maybe he was caught. But Ryuji wouldn’t admit that he missed the times he could come down and see his neighbor when one of them was busy. But you couldn’t blame him! Ren was a fun guy!

Not to mention he was Ryuji’s best friend.

“Uh, yeah.” The blonde found himself looking off and rubbing the back of his neck, one hand shoving into the pocket of his sweatshirt.

And then Ren seemed to decide that space between them wasn’t _needed_ , and he scoot closer to Ryuji, playfully shoving his shoulder a little bit.

“So what kind of thing would you like to _do_?”

What.

Hey! What was with that weird emphasis? He didn’t think…

Okay, well Ryuji probably could have worded that a little better. But they weren’t together. It wasn’t the right time for them to be thinking a little _deeper_ into the relationship, right? Ryuji didn’t want it to be strictly physical.

Dinner sounded great though, actually. And a movie was nice, but… Well, it wasn’t really _necessary_. Not for a first date, at least.

Unless Ren wanted that!

“Nothin _weird_ , dude.” Ryuji insisted as he stumbled slightly, shoving Ren back in return. All in a playful gesture, of course.

Ren only chuckled in response, his arms crossing over his chest. “So what _were_ you thinking then?”

Hmm. Well, Ryuji _did_ want to go out to dinner. That was a start, but he did wonder where they would plan on going. Ren knew the city better than him. The only places Ryuji really knew were some shitty take out places, and…

_Leblanc_.

Maybe Ren would like to go somewhere familiar, right? He did love the curry that Boss made, and he was always going to Leblanc anyway. 

Maybe that was cause for a reason for him to want to go somewhere else, but at the same time he _loved_ the cafe.

And Ryuji did as well.

Familiar faces, familiar food, and a relaxed setting. Ryuji thought it was perfect.

But he would have to come out about his plans first. Ren still wore that damn smirk on his face-- obviously thinking about teasing Ryuji. But the blonde wasn’t going to let him.

“Oh, you know!” He said, allowing himself to smile. He may not have been thinking straight either, but suddenly he reached out and took Ren by the arm. 

Slowly, he let his hand travel down to the black haired male’s hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. Ren didn’t _pull away_ , but he didn’t hold onto Ryuji’s hand tighter either. He just allowed his hand to be held, and that was more than enough to satisfy the blonde.

Why Ryuji had suddenly prompted to do such a thing though, he wasn’t sure. But the contact felt great. Despite Ren’s _fucking ice cold_ hand, it was still comforting. It was soothing, and the fact that he didn’t pull away made Ryuji’s heart flutter a little bit.

He felt like some high schooler with their first boyfriend. Then again, he hadn’t dated anyone in a while.

“We just… Well, since the bar and everything…” Okay, how would he move on from here? Beat around the bush? Get straight to it?

Ren probably preferred the latter.

“I was just thinkin’.” Okay, _obviously_. “We should go on a date. You know. Like an official one.”

Ren’s eyes widened when Ryuji said those words. Apparently he hadn’t been expecting something like that, huh? Great! Ryuji finally scored a point then. After all of the times Ren left him speechless, maybe he could catch up one day, huh?

Well, that was probably wishful thinking.

“I mean, since we haven’t really talked about where we’re goin’ from here. We kinda talked about how we were both interested in each other, so…” Well, that was putting it lightly. Ryuji could recall them both using the term ‘ _love_ ’, but who was counting that bit, huh?

Regardless, he did flinch at his wording a little bit. He could have very well worded that better. But it wasn’t bad, right? It wasn’t like he _had_ to do the asking out. They were both more than interested in each other. They’d both made that obvious.

Ren’s smile softened though, and Ryuji spotted him tucking some hair behind his ear as he thought about his answer. 

But wait.

He had to _think_? Why was he thinking? Did…  <.i>Did he not want to date?

A sudden bit of anxiousness coursed through Ryuji’s body as he waited for what his neighbor would say.

Did he fuck up somehow? Was Ren really not interested in going out with him? But from the other night…

“That’s fine.”

…

That’s _fine_?

That was all he had to say/ But… But he had Ryuji worrying! And what the hell did he mean by “that’s fine”?!

But then Ren smiled wide, his hands gripping onto Ryuji’s finally. “We can go out anytime. On a _date_.”

Yeah. A date. That was what Ryuji had asked, right? There was definitely no grey areas there. Ryuji wanted a date. That… That was why he asked.

Ren didn’t have to act like he was teasing him. Ryuji wanted this to be a happy time, dammit. He was finally getting a boyfriend, and he really didn’t want Ren to ruin anything with his snarky attitude.

“Yeah.” Ryuji paused after that for a moment. “Anyway, so I was thinking that we could do dinner or somethin’ at Leblanc. You like that place a lot and the food is good, so…” And it wasn’t like Ryuji had a lot of money to take Ren out someplace fancy.

There were plenty of restaurants in the city, but even Ryuji would admit that Leblanc was something special.

Ren only hummed in response, pulling Ryuji a little bit closer to himself through his hands. Ryuji had to take a step closer to his neighbor, and perhaps they were a little _too_ close, but unlike the first time they’d really spent time together, this was different. Now, they weren’t strangers. Ren hadn’t come to Ryuji’s place unwelcome and uninvited. 

It was different now. No longer was Ren a nuisance in his life. They were neighbors, best friends, and… _Boyfriends_. At least Ryuji _hoped_ that the date would go well and that they could be considered as such.

Then again, wasn’t it usually acceptable to call someone your boyfriend if they accepted an invitation on a date?

Ryuji didn’t want to push any buttons. He’d wait until after a few dates before officially calling Ren such a title.

Ren took their closeness to an advantage though-- letting go of Ryuji’s hands and instead finding themselves worming into the blonde’s back pockets. 

Ryuji, not having expected such a action, felt himself flinch at the contact-- stepping impossibly closer to Ren and holding onto his shoulders. 

“H-hey, man!” He said, only pouting when he spotted that damn smirk growing on his neighbor’s lips. What an asshole. “Can’t we save that for another time?”

Ren then frowned, the ends of his lips continuing to turn upwards in his feigned sadness. He wasn’t upset at all, and he was terrible at hiding it. 

“Does it really bother you that much?”

“ _Yes_.” Ryuji said, firm in his answer. He pushed Ren away from himself, but held him at arm’s length with his hands as Ren’s own hands fell to his sides. And damn this jerk for chuckling at the response he got. “Another time. We gotta go on a date first.”

“Dinner and a movie first?”

Well, yeah, that would be fine. Ryuji was really planning for dinner to be the big part of the night. But a movie was a great option too.

“Sure. That’s fine. But I want to take ya to Leblanc first.”

Ren chuckled a little bit again, covering his mouth with his hand. Was… Was there a joke that Ryuji didn’t quite get? Shit. Asking someone on a date to a restaurant that they liked shouldn’t be so difficult…

But then Ren pulled away and he made his way to his dresser at the opposite side of the room. “I’ll get changed then. Are you wearing that?”

Looking down at himself, Ryuji frowned. Was… Was this _okay_ to wear? Should he try and fix himself up a little bit? Shit. He’d never planned on changing his outfit!

“Uh, yeah! I can totally change!” He said, reaching into his pocket to fish around for his keys. They didn’t take long to find, and then Ryuji flashed a wave at his neighbor. “You get dressed too! I’ll meet ya back here!”

Heading out of the apartment without another thought, Ryuji made his way to the steps and wandered up them absently. Though he did wonder; did he have anything that he wanted to wear for the date? He thought that his usual form of attire would be enough, but Ren was right. Maybe it would be a good idea to dress up a little bit.

This was a date, right? I was supposed to be special. Now, as for what he should be wearing…

He walked into his apartment, slipping off his jacket once he was in the room. Ugh, it really was freezing in here. If only he could leave his space heater on while he was out with a clear conscious… 

It didn’t help that the heat wasn’t all that great to start off with.

Wandering over to his dresser, Ryuji tugged one of the drawers open with a soft grunt, looking over his choices. Jeans would be all right, right? You could really dress up a pair of jeans with the right shirt and a nicer pair of shoes. Especially if the jeans were in good shape, Ryuji was sure they’d be all right!

Which was great because he really didn’t think he had any pants here aside from various pairs of jeans.

Flipping through the pants, Ryuji’s hand paused on one pair in particular. It was a pair that was very familiar to him, and one he’d gained a compliment from a drunk girl in a club while wearing. Pulling out the pair, Ryuji looked them over.

His ass looked great in them. That was what she’d said. He… He could work with that, right? Ren would appreciate his ass looking great, _right_?

He’d already hit on Ryuji a little too hard tonight.

Smiling to himself, Ryuji tossed the pants onto his bed. Yeah. Ren would like those a lot. He was sure of it.

And now onto the shirts. 

Ryuji moved to the correct drawer and tugged that one open as well. He wasn’t sure what he would find exactly, but it was bound to be not as fancy and elaborate as he would have planned for a date.

Huh. Maybe he could steal a page from Ren’s book-- a button up over a plain shirt. He was sure he had some sort of button up _somewhere_. He did have to go to those job interviews and everything.

Oh! Speaking of…

Ryuji took a glance into the direction of the closet by the front door of the apartment. He was sure he’d left that black one in there. 

Great! So he had a plan!

Smiling to himself, Ryuji went rummaging through the dresser for a plain shirt. Let’s see. There was that light blue one, a black one, a red one… Nothing really seemed to fit though. Hmm…

But then one shirt caught his eye. Bright yellow, Ryuji tugged an old t-shirt out of the dresser. It had a lot of pictures on, which wasn’t what he’d been planning on, but this was Leblanc! A casual, maybe a little dressed up, date to a fun place that he always had a great time going to. Who was to say that he couldn’t wear a fun graphic t-shirt there?

And it fit Ryuji well, he thought.

Fine. So it wasn’t what he’d initially thought of, but it was good enough for him. He’d worry about shoes after.

Reaching down, Ryuji unbuttoned his pants and quickly got to changing into his new pair of jeans. 

The ones that made his ass look great.

And then he got to work with his shirt-- tugging the bottom over his head first and then grabbing for the one he’d picked out to pull over his head after. And once that was situated on his torso, Ryuji turned to head in the direction of the closet.

But something-- or _someone_ caught his eye.

Standing and leaning against the wall with arms crossed over his chest, Ren stood with a smirk plastered across his face-- eyes observing Ryuji almost _animalistically_.

Ryuji couldn’t help it. He jumped in surprise-- a small yelp coming from his throat as he pat his chest.

“J-jeez!” He said, heaving a breath. How did Ren move around so quietly? He’d managed to get into Ryuji’s apartment and everything without even being noticed.

Did Ryuji really forget to lock the door on his way in? Well, it’d been a short trip, and… He wasn’t exactly thinking about it…

“Man, ya could afford to say somethin’!”

Ren just laughed, pushing himself away from the wall and slipping his hands into his pockets. “Sorry. I was too busy enjoying the view.”

Ryuji felt his face slowly begin to burn after that. _Enjoying the view._ Ren said he was…

Shit. He totally saw Ryuji half naked.

Not that it was weird or anything! They were both guys and Ren had changed in front of Ryuji before, but…

Something about them being a couple now just made Ryuji feel _embarrassed_ about being naked in front of Ren. New couple jitters? Maybe.

Either way, Ryuji wandered around his bed and brushed past Ren to get to the closet. He pulled one of the doors open and began looking through it for his black shirt so he could wear it over the one he wore now.

He was busy looking-- sifting through the hangers with as much interest as he could feign-- trying to get over Ren’s words when the black haired male spoke again.

“You look nice.” He commented as he stood beside Ryuji, and the blonde felt a hand place on his his back. He couldn’t see it since he was currently sticking his nose as far as he could into the closet, but it sounded like there was a smile upon Ren’s face, and it had his flush softening a little.

“It’s nothin’ special.” He said, finally finding his shirt. Tugging it off of the hanger, Ryuji turned and slipped it over his shoulders, then buttoning the bottom few. “It’s just a t-shirt and jeans.”

“I mean it.” Ren’s words made Ryuji pause again, frowning as he halted the buttoning of his shirt. “You look good in yellow. And it suits you. It doesn’t have to be fancy to look nice.”

Ren’s voice was soft, and there was indeed a smile on his face. He looked so gentle and genuine in that moment, and Ryuji couldn’t help but take a look at what he was wearing as well.

Where Ren was usually always a little _overdressed_ , now it seemed a bit fitting for a more casual date. A turtleneck under a blazer and some jeans as well. Business casual really was a look that suited him well.

And then Ryuji turned back to the closet-- pulling out the first pair of not-ratty shoes he owned. They were just a pair of slip-ons. Nothing special, he thought, just like the rest of his outfit. But even Ren had on a pair of sneakers. It seemed like they were both trying to look nice but be comfortable, huh?

Ryuji could live with that.

“You look good too.” He said as he stood up, slipping his shoes onto his feet with one hand pressed against the wall for support. But after that was done, Ryuji had to weave around Ren to get to his bed again, pulling his wallet from his old pair of jeans and then throwing his jacket over his shoulders.

There. This was fine, right? Ren seemed happy with it, and that was what mattered

Ren seemed so happy with it, in fact, that he offered Ryuji his outstretched hand. Ryuji was quick to jog over to Ren, taking his hand and smiling. 

Walking to the cafe hand-in-hand? He could do that. That sounded great, actually.

And once they were into the hall, Ryuji was sure to lock the door this time.

The streets were cold, but his heart and his hand were warm. Ryuji couldn’t wait to get this date started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was supposed to include the date, but I guess the words had other plans. I hope you liked it either way!


	31. Coffee Beans

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so, so sorry

It was a short trip to Leblanc. And even though it was short, Ryuji was still chilled through by the time they got into the cafe, shivering and hugging himself as Ren closed the door behind them. 

There were a few people inside of the cafe, but Ren didn’t rush over to any of them. Ryuji wasn’t sure if it was due to him not really knowing any of them, or if it was because he was on a date and wanted to behave. Ryuji liked to think it was the second half, though he really didn’t want to keep his neighbor from any of his friends…

He felt Ren’s hand on his shoulder though, and the black haired male spared a wave to Boss behind the counter. Ryuji would have thought that Ren would go up to the counter to chat with Boss a bit, but he didn’t.

Maybe that was proof that he was more focused on their little date.

That thought made Ryuji happy, and he found himself smiling as he wandered into the cafe a little deeper.

The table that he usually liked sitting at was currently occupied, but the booth beside it was free, so he slipped into the seat facing the door with the hopes that Ren wouldn’t mind the spot so much.

And he didn’t seem to as he slipped into the seat opposite Ryuji, shrugging off his jacket and folding it once, then setting it beside himself.

Ryuji would do the same, but he was still far too chilled to take off his jacket yet. Thankfully it was nice and toasty in the cafe though, and hopefully the curry would warm him right through. Boss’ curry was always the best.

Futaba’s came pretty close though.

And Ryuji would rather die than try Ren’s again. Remembering that night gave the blonde the shivers.

And despite knowing the entire menu, Ren reached out and grabbed one of the menus that was tucked off to the side of the table. He flipped it open and scanned the page carefully, much to Ryuji’s surprise.

Ren _worked_ here. He’d _been_ working here for so long. How come he needed the menu like this? Or maybe he was debating…

But Ren _always_ got the same meal. Every. Single. Time. 

He was acting really weird, huh?

But then he glanced up at Ryuji, a small smile on his face. 

“Ryu?” He asked, and Ryuji blinked for a moment. “Aren’t you going to look at the menu?”

What? _Why_? Ryuji was just going to get the same thing he always got… Maybe not hot chocolate since Ren wasn’t there to make it for him, but some curry with fried chicken sounded great. Maybe some tea to keep warm…

“ _Or_...” Ren leaned forward, smile twisting into a smirk as he rested his chin on top of one of his palms, eyes narrowing. He was judging Ryuji. He was _teasing_ Ryuji. “Are you too distracted by my devilishly good looks?” Asshole.

Ryuji pouted, reaching out and taking a menu for himself with a huff. Why did Ren always tease him like that? Well, sure he _was_ really good looking. But Ryuji was more concerned about why he was insisting on looking at a menu at all.

“Nah, I just-” And then he paused. Looking at a menu. Like if they’d never been here before? Was… Was Ren trying to make this like they were trying out a new restaurant or something?

He was trying to play it up like a new date, huh? Had… Had Ryuji made a bad choice in picking Leblanc? But it was familiar. It was _home_.

Or Ren was just trying to be a smartass. Both of those options were perfectly reasonable.

Ryuji slammed his menu shut, frowning at Ren with a small glare.

“We don’t need menus! Just order what you want, man.” He said, and Ren burst out in a bit of laughter.

So he _was_ just teasing.

And then Ren leaned back in his seat, one arm outstretched above his head as he flagged down Boss. 

“Waiter! We’re ready!”

So he was probably in a super playful mood, huh? 

Boss looked out over the counter that he was currently leaning on with a frown. One eyebrow raised, he stood upright, palm pressed to the top of the counter. 

“Who are you talking to like tha-”

And then he paused, rubbing his forehead with one hand. It seemed like he understood that opposing Ren was a bad idea too.

Ryuji couldn’t help but chuckle. Ren being rude was pretty funny-- when it wasn’t aimed at _you_.

Regardless, Boss wandered closer to the duo, but stuck behind the counter. Hands on his hips, he looked at the two males.

“What do you want?” 

Well, that wasn’t great customer service. Then again, they weren’t normal customers. 

“Hey, Boss!” Ryuji said with a small wave. “I’ll have the usual. Oh! And tea this time!”

It was good, so why change it up, right?

And then Boss looked over to Ren, the frown on his face deepening. Ren was the one who’d given him trouble, after all. 

How he’d been able to deal with the other male for so long, Ryuji would never understand. Ren was always pulling Boss’ chain more than anyone else’s.

“I’ll have the usual too. Make sure the coffee’s extra hot.”

“Why do I even bother asking?” Ryuji heard Boss mumble and he chuckled again as the older male turned away to get them their orders.

There really wasn’t any point in telling him. He was bound to get what they wanted for them any time. 

Poor guy.

But then Ryuji turned back to Ren, who was happily smirking at the blonde once more, chin in his hands as he leaned on the table.

“W-what?” Ryuji asked, shrinking back in his seat a bit. He hated when he couldnt read Ren. Sure, that was almost non stop. But it still got pretty annoying at times.

Maybe if he could read Ren better, their relationship could go a lot farther.

The thought made Ryuji frown, and he looked down at the menu in front of himself, fingers fiddling with some loose string on the cover. 

He didn’t want to think that their relationship couldn’t go far, but… Hell, Ren always seemed like he was hiding something. Even after Ryuji had gotten him to talk about what he’d been doing behind him.

Ren just hated sharing about himself, didn’t he?

Ryuji really wished he wouldn’t get himself into too much trouble.

And then Ren’s hand came into view, cold fingers brushing over one of Ryuji’s hands and giving it a gentle squeeze.

“Hey…” Looking up at Ren proved that he was frowning, head tilted to the side a little bit. “You okay?”

Okay? Maybe. But definitely a little nervous. That much was obvious. His heart had been racing since the first time they’d held hands that day, and his hands were unnecessarily swaety at the moment. He hadn’t been on a date in so long.

But they were friends, right? He could act like they were friends. But with some benefits. Not _those_ kinds of benefits, but with hand holding and maybe a little bit of cuddling.

And kisses? Oh, Ryuji wanted to kiss Ren. His lips were probably really soft and warm…

But he just sighed, forcing a smile onto his lips. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine.” He said, and then he turned his hand over, fingers brushing against the palm of Ren’s hand. “Just a little nervous.”

It was best to be honest, right? Ren had promised to be honest with him, so it was best to offer that same notion, right?

Ren smiled a little after that, taking his hand from Ryuji’s and then he stood up a bit, reaching over the table to gently rub the back of his fingers against Ryuji’s cheek.

The motion was cute, sweet, and it was calming. Ren had always been gentle with him physically, and Ryuji absently leaned into the touch a little bit.

“Relax.” Ren said, his smile growing. “We’re here for fun. There’s nothing to be afraid of.”

And he was probably right. What _was_ there to be afraid of? Ren had already accepted Ryuji’s feelings-- hell, he’d made his own clear _before_ Ryuji did. 

They really were here for just fun.

Ren sat back in his seat when Boss walked over with a tray, setting down everything in front of the duo.

“You two on a date or somethin’?” He asked as he set down one last thing-- Ryuji’s curry in front of him.

Ren sat up straight, folding his hands on the table in front of himself. “Sure are.” He said, his smile curling into a huge shit-eating grin. Oh, so he really _was_ playful today. If nothing else had given it away, it was the way he spoke to Boss. 

Ryuji really did feel bad for him.

“It’s about time.” Boss grumbled out, and then he looked at Ryuji, a smile weaving onto his lips. “Congratulations. Now, eat up before it gets too cold.”

“Uh, yeah. Thanks.” Ryuji said, a faint blush crossing over his cheeks. It was about time? So he’d probably realized the two were interested in each other. 

Ryuji just looked down at his curry, trying to hide his blush.

He’d thought he’d been good at hiding it…

And once Boss had wandered off, Ren reached out and took his coffee, bringing it to his lips and then flinching back after taking a sip. “It’s hot!”

…

_Really_? What was he _thinking_ that it would be? He’d asked for it extra hot!

“That’s what you wanted!” Ryuji insisted, watching as Ren sipped at the water that’d also been brought to him-- probably to soothe his likely burned tongue.

Maybe Ryuji could kiss it to make it feel better later.

That was far too embarrassing to say out loud.

Ren was chuckling though, and then he flinched for a moment as a woman who’d been walking by placed her hand on his shoulder.

Ryuji hadn’t even noticed her until then.

“Ren? It’s been awhile.” She said with a small smile.

Adorned with short and messy brown hair, the woman was smiling down at Ren as she tugged the scarf from her neck to let hang loose around her shoulders.

Ren was out of the booth and to his feet in a moment, shaking the woman’s hand with earnest. “Sadayo, it’s good to see you.”

The woman nodded. “Likewise.” And then her gaze fell onto Ryuji and she frowned, looking back at Ren. “I didn’t expect to see you here on one of your days off. And with a friend.”

Ren just chuckled at that, looking down at Ryuji as well. “He’s something like that.”

Oh, so not all of Ren’s friends knew about his interest in Ryuji? 

Ren did give Ryuji a wink though, and then turned back to the female, stuffing his hands into his pockets. “You’re too busy to pay me a visit?”

And then the woman frowned as she looked back at Ren. “Not by choice. You know it’s difficult with two jobs. And ones that take up so much time too…” She muttered.

Ouch. Ryuji knew how tough that could be. He always felt like he didn’t have enough time in the day for a second job, but this woman _had_ two. His heart really went out to her. But living in New York City was expensive. He could barely break even some months too. Maybe it was about time for a change of job for the blonde.

Ren only chuckled at her words, and suddenly Ryuji found himself sighing. This was supposed to be a night just for the two of them. Ren had been so well behaved so far, but now? He was getting distracted.

But was he being selfish for wanting to spend this time sa just the two of them? Without distractions. Without other friends.

Maybe Leblanc really was a bad idea…

At least the curry was as good as always though.

Ren and the woman, Sadayo, spoke for a little bit. Well, it was mostly Sadayo talking. Ren wasn't always so open about talking. But he _seemed_ to be enjoying the conversation, occasionally sparing a glance over to Ryuji. 

Something about the look in his eyes said something though. Maybe an apology? He really was always being pulled aside to be spoken to. He had a lot of friends, if it wasn't obvious already. 

Maybe the look in his eyes was a silent plea for help from Ryuji. 

Ha. That was a funny thought. 

But maybe it was about time that Ryuji saved Ren for once. Clearing his throat, he looked up at the duo with earnest, sparing one last glance at Ren.

The woman looked between the two of them, a frown forming on her face. “Oh! I didn’t mean to bother you both on your…” A pause. “I’ll speak to you later, Ren.”

And, with that, she wandered off. Ren gave her a small wave before stuffing his hands into his pockets, smiling a little bit. And then he looked to Ryuji, his smile growing one his gaze landed on the blonde.

“Thanks. She’s a talker. Didn’t used to be.”

And then Ryuji just gave a shrug. “No problem. Shoulda known you’d be popular on a date.”

And to that, Ren laughed as he slipped back into the booth. “I’m irresistible, Ryuji. You know that.”

Ryuji found himself rolling his eyes, though he wasn’t _upset_ by Ren’s words. In fact, he expected something cheesy like that to come out of his neighbor’s mouth.

It may not have been the fanciest date, but it was comfortable. Ryuji was in a place he loved with a guy he adored. Sure, they were bothered for a little bit, but…

Ryuji felt that the coming days would only get better from here on out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kawakami is gonna be back! Don't worry ouo/

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it! Please do leave a little bit of feedback if you have the time! Thank you!


End file.
